Episode Report Card Aaron: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Super Hole
By Aaron | Season 6 | Episode 4 | Aired on 01.25.2003
Nappa again. This time the target is television. "[Man] wants to sit in his living room and watch people in a box fall in love, work, sing, golf, cry, fuck, and fuck up." And then write detailed essays about it. "Television," he continues, "is a one-way conversation between you and the world, where the world does the talking." I'm sure David Chase and Alan Ball know exactly what he's talking about. For added laughs here, by the way, the fat biker extra is picking his nose in the background.
Death Row. Lopresti arrives to take Cyril to his next electroshock treatment, but Cyril doesn't even know what that is. "Jesus, why is it every time I gotta tell you what ECT is?" gripes Lopresti. "That's because electroshock causes memory loss," answers Father Mukada as he passes by. Lopresti then scores the biggest laugh of the episode with a simple "Oh," before continuing to unlock Cyril's cell. Mukada keeps on walking, but he pulls up short and receives a particularly nasty shock when he approaches Hoyt's cell and Jaz pops out to lunge against the bars and scream like he's passing a large kidney stone. Oy. Shut up, Dirk Lecter. Hoyt whines some more about seeing the devil, and I'm forced to revise my earlier assessment and say that his screaming actually sounds more like he's just stepped on a cat that's passing a large kidney stone.
Mukada then schedules a meeting with Hoyt's lawyer, where we learn that the guy not only tortured animals and sodomized playmates as a child, but he also comes from money and attended Exeter and Harvard before dropping out to become a biker. Wow. And also -- hee! Mukada really does love to gossip.
And just like that, faster than you can even say "Shut up, Sparky," Hoyt is transferred off death row and into a ritzy psychiatric hospital, all while Cyril is still recovering from the after-effects of another ECT treatment. Down in Em City, meanwhile, Ryan takes advantage of Oz's patented nine-mile-long headphone cords to listen in on a TV broadcast explaining everything I just wrote in the previous sentence. Then his lawyer comes in for a visit, and also explains everything I just wrote in that sentence as well. He then reminds us that Cyril's execution is coming up in just two short weeks, so be sure and set your VCRs.
Crap-ass crime flashback. It's Prisoner #03N-679, Jahfree Neema (a.k.a. Said 2.0). Convicted January 10, 2003 for kidnapping his own daughter from a schoolyard. Sentence: Seven years, up for parole in three.
You know, the only thing that makes these Macbeth rehearsal scenes tolerable is Alvarez's perpetual annoyance with the proceedings. Well, that and the guy who plays Lady Macbeth, but we'll talk more about him later. Ryan wanders in just as things are wrapping up, and Betty Buckley pulls him aside to say that she has a confession to make. It turns out that she and our new pal Jahfree Neema had a bit of thing back in the day. In fact, he's the guy who convinced her to run out on Papa O'Reily and abandon baby Ryan to Seamus's tender mercies. Ryan has a hard time coming to terms with this revelation, especially when Betty further admits that she and Jahfree did more than just smoke dope and protest against The Man together. "You know what it was like living with your father," explains Betty. "It was very repressive, and Jahfree helped me to free myself." Oy. Shut up, Patty Worst.