Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A | 0 USERS: N/A YOU GRADE IT King Me, Asshole!
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 8 | Aired on 1997.08.25
Ross sits, watching two guys play checkers, when Schillinger makes his grand reentrance. He asks where Beecher is, but Ross tells him he's still in the Hole. Speaking of, we see an overhead shot of Beecher sitting on the floor of the Hole. There's something white in the bucket, and I don't even want to know what it could be. McManus enters with some clothes, and tells Beecher to get up, which he does with the query, "Do you want to touch my dick?" And there's another party I've been to. Ah, memories. McManus declines the offer. And here is my favorite exchange of the episode:
Beecher: I shit all over a man.
McManus: I know.
Beecher: That's not normal.
McManus: No.
It's all in Terry Kinney's delivery, people. We get a blink-and-you'll-miss-it dick shot as McManus tells Beecher that Schillinger's back in Em City. He says that Schillinger promised not to harm him, and asks Beecher for a reciprocal pledge. Beecher, after listing all the atrocities Schillinger has visited upon him, insincerely agrees. Well, those two are going to be braiding each other's metaphorical hair, don't you think?
Beecher is making his bed when Ryan enters, greeting Beecher with an expository "roomie," and asks how crazy Beecher is. Dude, you were there at the end of "Plan B." Several Aryans appear and stare threateningly at Beecher through the glass, but soon walk off, possibly having heard that Beecher's feces taste even worse than the slop they're served every day. Ryan tries to put a friendly? sexy? arm around Beecher, but Beecher rebuffs him. Oh, so he really is crazy. Ryan delicately tells Beecher that a Muslim riot is imminent, and that he may need Beecher, sanity optional. Beecher asks for what. Ryan: "Be my brother." Swoon. Beecher looks like he's about to assent, but Schillinger and Ross walk by at that moment. Beecher imitates the patented Said storm-out and yells after Schillinger, calling him an "asswipe." Adebisi repeats it, and it's just too funny. Ross tells Schillinger that he'd better kill Beecher, or his street cred is going to go the way of the term "street cred." Schillinger says he doesn't care, and walks off.