Episode Report Card Ragdoll: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Fabulous Life Of...
By Ragdoll | Season 1 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.12.2004
Haley bounces up to Peyton and says, "I am so excited to have Lucas all to myself for an evening. We have not had a night just to hang out in forever." Peyton says the same goes for her and Nathan, just as the man of the Boy Toy hour walks up to the two of them. Nathan jokes, "I know you're still into me, but a hundred and twelve dollars?" Haley smacks him in that girlfriend sort of way. He says, "Hey you." They smooch. She tells him to have fun. He says he won't. Haley makes googly-eyes; Peyton rolls her eyes. Then Nathan says, "Come on, let's get this over with." Peyton jokes, "Funny, that's what he used to say before we'd have sex." Ahh! Heh. Haley's face kind of falls when Peyton runs off and jumps on Nathan. I think she realizes just what she's done. Because, well, let's face it, Peyton and Nathan used to go out, and they did sleep together, which he and Haley aren't doing. Plus, she's cheated with Lucas on Brooke, and while she's been trying to make up for it the better part of the last three episodes, the potential for Peyton to slip back into old habits is certainly there. Oh boy, and even as the night begins, it's all mixed up: Haley should have gone with Nathan; Jake should have gone with Peyton; Luke would have had much more fun with Slutty Nikki; and Mouth, well, I think he and Brooke are a good pair for the evening…don't you?
Peyton and Nathan start their "date" at his new apartment. Peyton sees the remnants of a painting session and jokes, "So, you're planning to kill me?" And again with the serial killer/murdering jokes -- has everyone lost their sense of imagination? Nathan says, "Oh, the painters must have left it." So, the kid has no job, no money after paying for the apartment, but he can afford painters? Why wouldn't he just do it himself? Plus, what high school kid cares how his first apartment is painted? Is he really prepping for an episode of Changing Rooms? All that wind-up for one lame joke on Peyton's behalf. And it doesn't even make sense. Right, so Nathan continues, "So what do you think of the new place?" Peyton's stunned that he "really" moved out. Nathan says, "Yeah, the judge declared me emancipated." Peyton nods and says, "Good for you, Nate." He shows her around. They land in the bedroom, of course. Peyton jokes, "What, you've got your big fancy apartment but you don't believe in furniture? Where are we supposed to eat?" Nathan says, "We got the bed." Peyton gives him a look, and let the innuendos begin as Nathan unpacks the Chinese food.
Jake and Nikki, eating burgers and fries outside. Well, Jake just sits there with his hands jammed in his jacket pockets as Nikki eats something that looks like dessert. "Still doing that whole eating dessert before the meal thing, eh?" She holds out a spoon and says, "You used to think it was cute." Her lopsided mouth offers him up a lopsided smile. He's not buying what she's selling: "Yeah, that was before you abandoned my child." She takes back her spoon. Oh good grief, there's a tiny piercing on her nose, which I guess is even more proof of Nikki's inner "wild child." Yawn. She sets the spoon down entirely and says, "Okay, I guess we'll do this now." She pauses for a minute and then launches into her explanation: "I made a mistake. I didn't know what kind of mother I'd be. All my friends were going off to college, and my parents, well, you know how they felt. I just wasn't ready, Jake. Is it that hard to understand?" Oh please, you call that an explanation? How much more self-involved could this woman be? She wasn't ready? So, she dumped a newborn on a high school sophomore and took off, only to return eight months later and get busy with another high school sophomore in an amusement park? This, this is the woman Jake fell in love with, a lopsided Lucy with a mini-lisp? Save us all now from Nikki and her particular brand of magic. Please. Jake replies, "Yeah, Nikki, it is -- she was a part of you, you held her in your arms. I spent every night asking myself how you could just leave her behind." Jake's haircut looks like it was inspired by Alexander the Great. Nikki defends herself by saying, "I couldn't. I hated myself for leaving, that's why I came back. I want to be in her life, Jake, in yours too." She grabs the salt shaker for some reason and holds onto it for dear life. Jake! grabs it back, again, not sure what that's all about. She looks up at him with her lopsided eyes and smiles: "I missed you, you know?" Blah, she tried to call him, blah over the last eight months blah. Jake fiddles with the saltshaker, and if any of the salt spills, one of them better chuck it over his/her shoulder because neither needs to be tempting fate. He gives her a searing look: "But you didn't. Did you."