Episode Report Card Pamie: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Hate Your Life? Try Bad Wigs.
By Pamie | Season 3 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.14.2002
Luke's still laughing about Lorelai's big day at school. I have no idea what time it is, but it's daylight outside. Lorelai can't figure out why all of those kids ambushed her with those questions. Luke's still laughing. Lorelai says she'll never be able to go back there again. Luke says at least now he's got a pleasant memory from that school. Lorelai stops Luke as she spots the Sweater Brigade marching over. It's the Bad Blonde Wig Gang, and they're hella pissed at Lorelai for preaching the joys of teen pregnancy at today's PTA meeting. They're all wearing stupid sweaters, and they're all wearing the same bad wigs. This is so dumb and unworthy of recapping, but anyway, they're mad at Lorelai for talking about teen pregnancy. Lorelai says she was just answering their questions. Bad Wig says she should have changed the subject. Lorelai accidentally calls their kids Nazis. "Sounds like you just flaunted your mistakes," one of the Bad Wigs says. Lorelai says the members of the Bad Wig Gang have no right to judge her. Lorelai says they're acting like she walked into the room tossing condoms in the air. "Might as well've," one of them says to her. Actually, then she would have been preaching safe sex, and not procreation. Lorelai says next time she'll bring a banana and have a little show-and-tell. Lorelai says she's a mother who doesn't gloss over subjects because they're uncomfortable. Bad Wig says this whole incident was awkward and unnecessary. Lorelai: "No, Deb, I'd say, Deb, that what's awkward and unnecessary, Deb, is that you all seem to go to the same lousy hairdresser." The Bad Wig Gang all drop their mouths and look around in unison, acting "Offended." Luke excuses himself.
And he moves very quickly, since he's back in his apartment, saying hello to Jess, who asks what's going on outside. Luke sort of blows it off and then checks the closet. Nobody's inside. Luke asks Jess if he had a girl in there earlier. Jess admits that he did, but that he didn't put her in there; she ran in a panic when she heard Luke and Lorelai coming upstairs. Jess says he didn't care, but that's just women. Luke asks if they can have a talk. Jess makes a Ward Cleaver joke that isn't funny. Luke says he knows that Jess is at the hormonal girl age but he's got to think about how he should act around a girl he cares about. Luke says he doesn't care about Probawhore and doesn't even know her last name. She said it once, but it "didn't stick." She doesn't care about him, and they're just hanging out, fooling around -- nothing serious. They treat each other the same way. Luke doesn't understand. Jess says that the girls he cares about don't care about him. Jess starts laying into Luke, saying that unlike him, Jess won't just wait around hoping that one day the girl will come around and like him. He asks Luke if he's fixed anyone's porch lately or gone on a picnic or gotten roped into giving a speech at a high school. Luke tells Jess to shut up. Jess says at least he has a little self-esteem. Luke tells Jess again to shut up. Jess says he's not some kind of golden retriever hoping Rory will fall into his arms one day: "If she doesn't want to be with me, then fine." Luke says that Jess has no idea what he's talking about. Jess gives a "Whatever," and then says he's leaving to see "what's-her-name." He tells Luke he'll bring home a new leash for him. Luke tells him to get out. I guess they filmed that scene quickly on a soundstage, because there was a really weird echo in the room.