Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A | 495 USERS: A- YOU GRADE IT The Short Goodbye
By Couch Baron | Season 4 | Episode 3 | Aired on 2010.08.08
...the three of them arrive home, and the way Anna collapses onto the couch makes it clear she wouldn't be going anywhere for a while even with two good legs. Stephanie says she'll hitchhike home, but Don worries she'll get picked up by "some creep." Stephanie gives him a look and wryly replies, "I guess this is safer." Here's a newsflash: College kids are sassy!
In the car, Stephanie asks if Don is married or divorced, as there's obviously no way he could have stayed single his whole adult life, looking as he does. Hearing his current status, Stephanie asks if he goes "on those dates where you sit there and ask each other questions," and for your future economy of words the term you're looking for is "first dates," my dear. Don sighs that they're "a means to an end," but Stephanie points out a flaw in the method -- no one knows what's wrong with themselves. "Everyone else can see it right away." Don looks intrigued by her keen observation...
...and then they're pulling up to her door. She thanks him for the ride and asks what time his flight is, and he says noon, "unless you think I should change it." Oh, Don. Leaving aside any other commentary on this, how would you explain it to Anna? I mean, not that there's any romantic hold there, but it is her niece, you know, and her affection clearly means more to him than just about anything in the world. On top of that, this is the only place in the world he's ever seemed upstanding, and pure. Anyway, she patiently asks him what he's doing, and he confesses he doesn't know, but says she's so "beautiful, and young," and adds that he and Anna never had a romantic relationship. Stephanie's on the same page as I am, though, pointing out that regardless, Don loves her, and he admits that that's true, "for lots of reasons, and in a very different way." That is, a way that will last beyond his next orgasm. Her face falling, Stephanie says she has to tell him something, even though she promised she wouldn't, "but I see you two together, and I know I have to." And here's where dread suffused me on first viewing, and with good reason - Anna is dying of cancer. That's why she broke her leg -- "it's in her bones, all over her body." Don reels for a moment at the news, and then exasperatedly opines that it's like her not to say anything, but he's stunned and angry to hear the kicker - Anna doesn't even know. Stephanie goes on that the doctors said she doesn't have long, so there's no point in telling her, but Don bites out, "Some quacks out in Pedro?" Also, he pronounces the name of the town correctly (PEE-dro instead of PAY-dro), which may not mean anything to you but made a native friend of mine discover that it was possible for him to love this show more. Stephanie begs him not to make her sorry she told him. "I didn't want you to leave here and not know." On the verge of tears, she gets out of the car, and Don looks like he's sobered up in a big hurry.