Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT At Least I'll Be Alive
By Jacob Clifton | Season 2 | Episode 4 | Aired on 07.05.2011
At least now we know -- don't we? -- that Jason, the Jason Thing, is not connected to the Spencer/Ian mystery, so that simplifies it a little, but I still as a recapper get a little nervous when I think I'm missing something. Even on this show, where usually the more confused you are the better it turns out to be when it's done. Maybe Spencer really is losing her shit and I'm just unable to process the concept that she is losing her shit because you gotta have heroes.
MARIN
Lucas comes by the next morning, and Hanna is super cute with him, and he thanks her for being amazing last night and praises her for being a good friend -- not a mini-Alison, not the user she can be -- and he's so very sweet and it's so very touching that she runs straight to Therapy Anne!
One tiny taste of sanity and ol' Hanna's on it like a carton full of cupcakes and a fifth of vodka. Love it.
MONTGOMERY
Byron: "I exist, okay?"
Aria: "Provisionally, sure. I'm glad our family is kind of a family again."
Mike: "I will do absolutely anything I can to screw that up."
(Blackmailing occurs w/r/t to the Pretty Little Diaspora.)
Byron: "Can I take you to school?"
Mike: "I have to go deal drugs or whatever weird shit I'm doing."
The Bluetooth makes me wish fervently that Mike's secret is that he is a day-trader, like a Boiler Room kid, and that he's spending his schooldays up Gordon Gekko's pantleg, and that's what's really going on. Wouldn't that be amazing? If that were the form his rebellion took?
Montgomerys: "I can't believe you were skipping school just to get your Series 7!"
Mike: "Second prize is you're fired, Mom! Always Be Closing!"
THERAPY ANNE
Hanna: "Perhaps there is something to the Talking Cure."
Anne: "Thanks for validating my profession."
Hanna: "The deal is that we all did things to make Alison love us, but me most of all because I was fat and hated myself the most."
Anne: "She sounds like a bitch."
Hanna: "To paraphrase the books on which this series is based, it's not the whole story. She made you feel magic. She negged and propped while peacocking or whatever."
Anne: "Okay, start there. Not to me, to the empty chair where Imaginary Alison resides."
"Alison. You were the best friend I ever had. And that meant a lot to me. You meant a lot to me. But you were also the worst enemy I ever had. And I can't believe it took me this wrong to realize that."