Episode Report Card Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Cary, Get Out Your Cane
By Jacob Clifton | Season 3 | Episode 12 | Aired on 01.08.2012
Marthas and Caitlins. I think he's well aware.
FLORRICK
Will: "Hey Alicia, remember that time you hired that elfin trickster spirit from the forest to get the Treasury off your ass?"
Alicia: "Yeah. Elsbeth Tascioni. Just take this penny and throw it in the air on any nearby street corner. Take the first left, second right, and then wait at the first public fountain you see."
David Lee: "Hey Alicia! How's it going, good buddy?"
Alicia: "Oh, shit. Please don't hit me in the face."
David Lee: "Haha, you kidder! No, I just designed six different iterations of your children's trust, depending on which way you go with your marriage. I just thought it would be more convenient to anticipate every possible future need you might have. Because we're best friends!"
Alicia: "David Lee, what is going on. I can't even smell the brimstone that usually attends your arrival."
David Lee: "That's oatmeal raisin you're smelling because I also popped some cookies in there. Piping fresh. Just thought you could use a little pick-me-up, friendster! Want a foot rub?"
Alicia: "Oh my God, you think I'm going to screw you on this stripper thing."
KAL-EL
Eli: "Would they ever get rid of David Lee?"
Kalinda: "No. He brings in a shit-ton of money."
Eli: "What if he starts costing more?"
Kalinda: "Then fuck him. Remember the Cheese Lobby? I was on standby to murder you in the parking lot for about a week there. It was touch-and-go."
Eli: "So what you're saying is that I should sabotage him? Make a massive power play to rid this firm of the head of Family Law?"
Kalinda: "Girl, if you go after him and don't win, he will wear your tiny little eyebrows as earrings. They won't be able to identify your remains."
Eli: "We are talking about $1.2M, Kalinda."
Eli makes a succession of sassy faces at David Lee's back.
DEPO
Preston: "Man, all you bitches are just screaming for cover, huh?"
Alicia: "No, we're cool. Thanks for asking."
Preston: "Do you know what perjury is? And its penalties?"
Alicia: "Uh, yeah."
Preston: "What is it."
Alicia: "Perjury is a class three felony resulting in imprisonment for no less than two years and no more than five. You fuckface."
Preston: "What did you do on the Huntley divorce?"
Alicia: "Supervised, I helped negotiate division of assets and executed paperwork."
Preston: "And?"
Alicia: "What do you mean?"
Preston: "You functioned as something of a hand-holder for my client?"
Alicia, immediately: "Nope!"