Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: C | 106 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT The Human Diary
By Cindy McLennan | Season 5 | Episode 9 | Aired on 12.05.2013
1953. Enzo schools Damon on living for the future rather than the moment. He confesses his future involves killing Whitmore's dog and mailing the carcass to him, postage due. He asks Damon his revenge scenario. As Damon scratches his initials into the rock wall, he tells Enzo he can picture it, but that's all we get for now.
Back in the present, Elena tells Damon that Wes knew her father. Maxfield says they worked together and that Grayson Gilbert was also an Augustine. While Elena knew Grayson was a vampire hunter, he was also the town doctor and a caring, compassionate man. "He wouldn't be part of a place that would cut your eyes out." Damon says, "People are full of surprises." When Elena starts to cry, Damon apologizes for getting her caught up in all this. "But I promise you I will get you out of here, okay?" They hold hands through the bars. Elena manages to nod and smile.
Over at Mossy Manse, Stefan is now locked in the safe while Caroline pores over her Intro to Psych text book. Katherine has less academic ideas on the brain, so she asks Caroline if she and Stefan have ever hooked up. Caroline says they're friends. Katherine: "Your loss. He's great in bed." Then why were you sleeping with Damon, concurrently, Kiki? I know, I know. He's probably great in bed, too. Caroline ignores the whole vulgar topic in favor of her textbook's entry on "Prolonged Exposure Therapy." Neither Katherine nor I have the patience to listen to Caroline read and not just because she pronounces every comma, aloud.
Inside the safe, Stefan has already had enough. He repeatedly calls out for Caroline. He also fixates on something inside the safe, but I don't know if its blood Caroline failed to clean up when she supposedly sanitized the safe or if it's just corrosion or a shadow. Stefan pants that he can't breathe and passes out.
Outside the safe, Katherine thinks the main question is, "How do you help the guy who always comes to the rescue? Stefan's a hero. That's who he is at his core. He can't always come through for himself, but he can always come through for everyone else. I've got an idea." It's gotta be better than Caroline reading every, "Comma," so let's have it, Kiki. Not yet? Okay. Then let's cut to the...
Whitmore Dungeon. This scene cuts back and forth between Damon's flashbacks and the present. If I have to cover every blipvert, I'll be in no better shape than Stefan. Let's compress. Damon survived thanks to Enzo's friendship. Enzo tried to draw Damon out with talk of sports and cars, and then finally turned to girls. Damon admits the girl he was trying to impress was more of the horse and carriage era. Enzo says, "Just one girl?" Damon: "I never met another one like her." I'd let that gross me out in regards to Damon and Elena's relationship, but it's nothing that wasn't introduced regarding both Stefan and Damon in the very first season.