Episode Report Card M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Terrorist Leader: 2. Bloated Government Bureaucracy: 1.
By M. Giant | Season 4 | Episode 15 | Aired on 03.27.2005
The call is from Poor Man's Eric Stoltz, who's got bad news: his plane has been grounded due to technical difficulties. ImhoTerror isn't trying to hear that: "Resolve this now…your window of opportunity on the target closes in an hour." Poor Man's Eric Stoltz grimly says he understands, hangs up, and approaches the one mechanic in the entire hangar, and indeed the entire Air Force, as far as we'll see this hour. The mechanic explains he's been sent down from Hawkins FAFB (Fictional Air Force Base) to work on the plane, which is why he doesn't not recognize Poor Man's Eric Stoltz, if you follow. The mechanic says that the trouble sensor is indicating a hairline fracture in one of the plane's strut pins, and there won't be a replacement until morning. Poor Man's Eric Stoltz acts mildly put out, like he can't believe some dinky little strut pin is keeping him on the ground, until the mechanic explains that if the strut pin fails, the back end of the plane will go all Lost on him when he tries to land. The only safe way out of the aircraft would be to eject and hope the plane doesn't hit anyone on the ground. Poor Man's Eric Stoltz nods as though he surely wouldn't want that to happen. The mechanic says he's about to make his report to the Chief Mechanical Officer and "head up to Ventura for a little R&R." "Don't let me hold you up," says Poor Man's Eric Stoltz. Which is an interesting choice of words, because as soon as the mechanic turns his back, Poor Man's Eric Stoltz puts a bullet into it. Lucky for PMES that he and the mechanic had the entire hangar all to themselves, isn't it?
9:05:22. At CTU, Soul Patch is handed a report, the contents of which he relays to Bitchelle: TerrorMom has been dead less than thirty minutes, according to the coroner's report. The fastest autopsy in history aside, I'd just like to say, "duh." You were still listening in on her conversations less than thirty minutes ago. So they can assume that that period is when ImhoTerror grabbed Kiefer. Again, duh. Also, the search radius is 1500 square miles, but that's increasing by the minute. As it does. Bitchelle asks about chatter; Soul Patch says it's actually dying down, which could either mean the end of attacks for the day, or, as Bitchelle says, "The calm before the storm." All they know is that if Kiefer's alive, he'll figure out a way to contact them. Well, sure, but only if there's a nearby army to fight with. Soul Patch goes back to work. Bitchelle looks at him speculatively, then renews the conversation: "I heard Kiefer called you today," she says. Soul Patch admits it. "And that you saved his life," Bitchelle presses. "Well, we both know I owed him one, right?" Bitchelle gives him a tight smile. They do not have sex. Yet.