Episode Report Card Sobell: A | 2 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT "Can I Get A 'Hell, Yeah'?"
By Sobell | Season 3 | Episode 1 | Aired on 2001.03.16
In one of the corridors, we see Rygel zooming along on his chair, shouting, "Greenschlick! Where are you? You told me the ship would be ready by now. Greenschlick!" From the depths of the couch, the husband applauds, crowing, "He is the coolest puppet in the history of puppetry!" He loves Rygel.
The faint sounds of glossolalia float out into the corridor. Rygel follows them back to the operating theatre, where Crichton gives him the gibberish special. Rygel begins, "You're even more inarticulate than --" but stops as he beholds the twitching, gasping surgeon. "Tokot..." he says gently.
Cut to Moya, with Zhaan saying, "We'll come down at once." We quickly cut to the kitchen where Chiana rushes to meet D'Argo all, "Hey! We got a meal ready! I was not at all rubbing up against your son! There's no guilty conscience here at all!" D'Argo gives her the 411 on the planetside sitch. Then he tells her and Jothee to stay put in the event that Scorpius's carrier appears -- this way, the two of them can starburst to safety via Moya. It's obviously because he can't stand the thought of losing either of them, but he can't say it, and neither Chiana nor Jothee see it that way. So D'Argo barks, "Do what I tell you!" and thus tidily provides the convenient, shoddy excuse both parties need to carry on in his absence.
Cut to Braca, who is getting a quick season 2 recap from Greenschlick while Scorpius broods and glowers in the background like the world's wrinkliest teenager. Sergeant Major Good-looking comes in to break the news of Team Moya's imminent arrival planetside. By the way, he too displays unnerving familiarity with a metrosexual skin-care regimen; I bet he uses the Nivea For Peacekeepers facial wash, toner and exfoliating scrub. Scorpius is not pleased that Greenschlick didn't tell them first. The greasy huckster protests that all he needs to do is talk to Team Moya -- "I'll tell them anything you like." "How prescient of you," Scorpius diffidently comments. Then he plunges the mother of all syringes into the base of Greenschlick's skull. As the con artist drops to his knees, body stiffening as he pants, Scorpius puts on a headset with an optical interface and exposits, "Yours is an interesting species, Greenschlick. Simple mind, simple brain, easily dominated. And easily controlled" I believe this is the most successful use of Bluetooth technology EVER. (I kid. Sort of.) We see Scorpius and Greenschlick doing a sort of mime exercise just in case any viewers missed the message that Scorpy's ordering Greenschlick's brain to do things.