Episode Report Card M. Giant: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Now That's Hospitality
By M. Giant | Season 5 | Episode 9 | Aired on 02.19.2006
Kiefer and Curtis are already in their CTUmobile, although they're not actually moving yet. Audrey tells Kiefer she understands that he can't speak freely in Curtis's presence, so Kiefer turns his aviator shades to Curtis in the driver's seat and smoothly lies, "It's Audrey. It's personal." Curtis gives Kiefer leave to step out of the vehicle and take the call privately. Once Kiefer's alone, Audrey quickly tells him that Nathanson is on the line for him. "Why me?" Kiefer asks, like that's what's important now. Nathanson cuts in to say that Audrey can hang up, adding that his phone has special tech-mojo that will tell him if anyone else comes on the line. Kiefer agrees that Audrey can hang up, and she does. "What do you want with me?" he asks Nathanson. Me, me, me. Nathanson says he wants protection. "The terrorists you're after are trying to kill me," he states, in the tone you use to say "four out of five dentists recommend Trident® to their patients who chew gum." Kiefer tells Nathanson to turn himself in, but Nathanson says that Walt wasn't the only person in the government who was in on his little scheme. Ah ha, so Evelyn was onto something. Kiefer points out that he has reason to kill Nathanson himself, namely the frame-up for Palmer's murder. Nathanson glibly answers that they both want to stop the gas from being released in the U.S., and they'll need each other's help. Conceding the point, Kiefer asks where to meet Nathanson, who gives Kiefer directions to a phone booth. "Be there in ten minutes or I'll be gone," he threatens. Hey, who called whom, big talker? Curtis calls Kiefer back over to the truck, and as Kiefer hangs up, he pretends he's been talking to Audrey this whole time. It's 3:11:47 as he and Curtis take off.
As if Kiefer didn't have enough on his mind, Curtis turns out to be one of those guys who can't ride in the car without making small talk. Kiefer hates that, you know. Curtis yammers about Audrey, saying she's a good person and he hopes they get a chance. Kiefer would probably respond a bit more effusively, but he's too busy checking the passenger-side mirror to make sure there are no other CTUmobiles behind them. When Curtis comes to a stop at the next stop sign, Kiefer removes his shades, pops Curtis in the side of the head, and hauls him into a sleeper hold. Curtis grunts and struggles as Kiefer tells him not to fight it. Because if he does, Kiefer will be bouncing around the inside of that CTUmobile like a rag doll. The truck rolls gently up the curb as Curtis's feet come off the brake pedal, but Kiefer doesn't release his chokehold until Curtis is out. In order to make this scene more believable, it's framed in really close in hopes we'll forget that Roger Cross has arms. "I'm sorry," Kiefer whispers. So sorry, in fact, that he goes around to Curtis's door, drags him out of the vehicle, and leaves him lying on the ground under some bushes before driving off in Curtis's CTUmobile. At least he got him off the street. It's 3:13:14.