Episode Report Card Couch Baron: B | 3 USERS: A YOU GRADE IT Brainwashing The Brainless
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 9 | Aired on 11.29.2004
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.So like, you guys? Remember when Sydney joined that cult on Melrose Place? And how the only way they could make her look unslutty by comparison was to cast Tracie Lords as her friend? Good times, those. Anyway, some 09er dickhead joined a cult, so his parents ask Keith to see if there's something illegal going on. Veronica infiltrates the cult, where, poignantly enough, she finds a lot more acceptance than she has in the last year at Neptune High. And in the end, the cult is actually benevolent, which possibly is more than we can say for the parents of the 09er kid. That story ends in a very satisfyingly ambivalent way. Now, in season-arc-land, we pick up at the beginning of the episode right where we left off in the last one, as Veronica steels herself to accept the fact that Jake might be her father. She does lose her lunch over the thought that Duncan might be her brother, but the mildness of the reaction probably indicates that Duncan never even rounded second with her. One hopes, anyway. Veronica quickly determines that the head of Kane Security was the one that was tailing her a year ago, so she resolves to make the Kane family pay for the hurt they've caused her by exposing her real parentage. She needs proof for that, though, so she gets a test to determine who her dad is once and for all. But in the end, she realizes Keith is all the dad she needs. Oh, and by the way, Sydney Tamiia Poitier gets the most unceremonious firing ever. Keep an eye out for her on Joan of Arcadia. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
We pick up where we left off, in the parking lot outside the prison. Veronica looks up from sobbing, and VMVO goes hard-ass: "So Jake Kane is your father. Deal with it, Veronica." Yes, deal with the fact that your real dad is one of the richest men on the West Coast. Perhaps your therapy can include your own pony and a ride in the space shuttle.
Cut to Veronica driving on the highway, as VMVO wonders if her dad knows, and if that might be why he went after Jake so obsessively. Then: "Oh, God. Does this mean...is Duncan my..."
Cut to Veronica hurling out the door of her shouldered car. Hee. Although for me, that answers the question of whether they slept together with a resounding "no." If they had, her steering wheel would be pretty sticky right about now. Driving again, Veronica wonders if the photos of her in the gun sights were how Jake stuck it to her dad. I'm not clear that Keith ever saw those, but maybe she means that Jake threatened Lianne with the photos and thereby got her to leave Keith. Veronica goes on to say that if that's what Jake did, Veronica's taking him down. Geez, Veronica. Wasn't Duncan enough? Oh, speaking of which, if Jake really were Veronica's father, would he really have allowed Duncan and Veronica to date? I mean, I know we don't know a lot about Jake's moral compass, but...there's evil, and then there's just plain gross.
Veronica's taking a close look at the pictures. She notes that one of them was taken in a part of town that she only went to because her mom insisted that she see a counselor after Lilly died. The counselor's name was "Doctor Dave," which, given that CBS owns UPN, has to be a shout-out to Doctor Dan on Joan of Arcadia. And from Veronica's attitude, it sounds like this guy was about as useful to her as Dan was to Joan. I mean, anyone who tells you that you shouldn't be seeing Cute Guy God is no one you need in your life. Anyway, Veronica knows she saw the counselor on Thursdays, and when she sees another photo of her at school in front of a banner that says, "Book Week," she's got enough information to...
...rush into school and ask "Miss Murphy," her English teacher, when Book Week was. First week in February. Working fast, Veronica figures out that the person who photographed her at school had to be sitting at a particular table at a nearby restaurant. She examines her check, which is just for an iced tea (for a dollar! Are we back in Tijuana?). Sure that she's right, she asks a server whether they still have the receipts from February, as she claims to think she's being stalked. Oh, come on, the forum posters love you! Veronica produces the pictures to back up her claim, and the woman is sympathetic. Well, it's not that I wouldn't be sympathetic too, but I'd also wonder why she's coming around with these questions in November when the photos were taken in February. She's not going to be outrunning any bullets at that speed.