Episode Report Card Deborah: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Collision
By Deborah | Season 1 | Episode 19 | Aired on 04.01.2004
Adam's alone in the music room at school, eagerly pawing through a bunch of old vinyl records. Just when I think I can't love him any more than I do. Joan comes in to practice the piano and sees him; his back's to her. She hesitates and says, "Hey." He glances around and returns the "hey" unenthusiastically. He's wearing a hoodie over a shirt Iris obviously picked out. Heh. Poor, sweet, confused boy. Sitting at the piano, she asks what he's doing. Adam: "Well, the up side of schools not having any money is they still have all this dope old vinyl." See, right there…a reason to love the government for gutting education budgets. And you thought it was all bad. He says he's getting some Miles Davis for Iris: "She's never heard him." Joan: "Is that that trumpet guy you played me?" He says it is and stands up to show her a Miles Davis album: "Check it out: original pressing, 1961." I believe it's Someday My Prince Will Come. Joan says it's cool. She explains that she has to practice the piano, and warns him to try not to listen. He says he was just heading out. As he walks up the stairs out of the room, she stops him by saying, "I'm sorry for attacking your shirt. I was just a -- just a little, you know, shocked at the whole fashionista thing, and had this involuntary doofus response. But the shirts look great -- makes you easy to find in a crowd." Joan really needs to learn when to stop talking. Adam's slightly annoyed with this, and Joan says, "I did it again." She shakes her head in disbelief. Adam: "Listen, what -- what are we, Jane? I mean, we're -- we're not…together, but it seems like we are sometimes." Joan: "I don't know. Maybe it's because we were, for, like, a second." Adam looks vaguely hurt at the memory, and also at the suggestion that it was only for a second, because clearly it was more than that for him: "Yeah." Joan says she doesn't want to mess things up for him and Iris. Yeah, nobody in this room believes that. Adam looks down. Joan: "I -- " She breaks off and says she has to practice. Adam: "Sure. Later, Jane."
She starts playing, and I've far from an expert ear but that thing sounds out of tune to me. Also, some hammers are broken so no sound issues from certain keys. She opens up the piano lid to investigate, then begins to remove the upright wooden piece that the music rests against. It probably has some specific name but I don't know what it is. It's heavy and awkward and she loses control of it, but some guy (with a 'fro and wearing a windbreaker) appears out of nowhere to grab it. He says, "Having trouble?" It's more of a comment than a question. Joan says the piano's pretty messed up. Guy: "That's why I'm here, Joan." She sighs with irritation and says, "Oh, you." He plays a bit and comes to the conclusion that some of the hammers are broken: "That's why it doesn't sound right: you can't play all the notes." Also, it probably hasn't been tuned since the Carter administration. Joan: "Yeah, well, you can raise people from the dead, so…just wave your hand and fix the stupid piano." Piano Tuner God retorts, "You want special effects, rent Lord of the Rings. I'm a craftsman, and fixing a piano is delicate work. This one has been…badly neglected." Joan: "Yeah, well, budget cutbacks. You should see the girls' bathroom." Piano Tuner God: "There's all sorts of reasons why things break. The important thing is to fix them." Joan seems puzzled and annoyed by this. He continues, "Plato said, 'Music is the essence of order, and leads to all that is good, true, and beautiful.'" Clearly, Plato never saw American Idol. Joan: "Okay, so now you're quoting Mickey Mouse's dog." Oh, lord. Come on. Even if she didn't know who Plato was -- which rather strains credibility -- would she really confuse him with Pluto? Seriously, there's only so much I can slap myself. ["And Joan's reference took me a few seconds to get, so I can't decide which is less believable -- that a sixteen-year-old wouldn't know Plato, or that a sixteen-year-old would know Pluto. Isn't that reference a little old for her? Anyway." -- Sars] Piano Tuner God lets that go and continues, "No, music can't be true if some of the notes are missing." Joan: "You're like an endless pop quiz. Music is a metaphor for life, for people…because pretty much everyone I know is missing a few notes." He says he has to go to the truck for new hammers: "You should find someplace else to practice." Joan: "That's it?" He gives her an apathetic Godwave as he wanders off.