Episode Report Card Cindy McLennan: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT I Will Be Your Father Issues
By Cindy McLennan | Season 5 | Episode 13 | Aired on 04.15.2009
The Captain and Tennille remind us that "Love Will Keep Us Together" as Miles and Hurley approach the Orchid. Oh I hope, I hope, I hope that's the theme for their new sitcom. Hurley tries to get Miles to "just admit it" and informs him, "I talk to lots of dead people." I will now transcribe this next bit, because I love them together (da na na whatever -- I will, I will, I will, I-eye wi-illl).
MILES: So you have conversations with them, like they're your pals?
HURLEY: Sure, all the time. Sometimes we even play chess.
MILES: You actually see them?
HURLEY: Of course. Why wouldn't I?
MILES: Because that's not how it works.
HURLEY: Aha! You wouldn't know how it works, unless you can do it.
MILES: What I can do has nothing to do with chatting with ghosts, you nitwit.
THE AUDIENCE: Except for that time you chatted with the ghost.
MILES: It's a feeling. A sense. When somebody's dead, their brain stops functioning, which means there's no more talking. There's just who they were and whatever they knew before they died.
HURLEY: That's not how it works for me.
MILES: Great. I'm happy for you.
HURLEY: You're just jealous my powers are better than yours.
MILES (rolling his eyes): We're here. Shut the hell up and deliver your damn sandwiches.
They drive up to the Orchid, which is still under construction. Dr. Pierre Chang comes to greet the van and asks Miles what Hurley is doing there. Miles can't meet Chang's eyes, but he manages to explain that Hurley came to deliver lunch to the crew. Chang says, "Lunch? The instructions were to come alone." Hurley, ever helpful, says, "Don't worry. I won't tell anyone about the body." When Chang is upset that Hurley knows about the body, Miles apologizes. "He was rooting around in the back and he saw it." You can almost hear his inner monologue, "Don't look at him. Don't look at him. Don't look at him. Don't look at DADDY!"
Hurley assures Chang he can keep a secret. Chang says, "Well you'd better..." he reads the name on Hugo's jumpsuit. "Hurley, 'cause if you think working in the kitchen is bad..." Hurley interrupts to inform Chang he likes working in the kitchen. Chang appears charmed at this, but then closes in on our boy. "Well, how do you feel about polar bear feces? Because if you breathe one word of this, I'll have you shipped to Hydra Island so you can weigh turds for their ridiculous experiments." Hurley says, "Gross," and much like his son does, Chang seems to find Hurley exasperating, but strangely endearing, because he abruptly ends his threats and calls for two workers to get "the package" and bring it inside. Chang starts to walk back to the site then turns to the man he doesn't recognize as his son. "And you? Stay here 'til I get back. You think you can handle that?" Still not meeting his eyes, Miles replies, "Yes sir."
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