Episode Report Card Pamie: B- | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Rory's A Material Girl
By Pamie | Season 5 | Episode 8 | Aired on 11.08.2004
Emily is in her element, telling people in uniforms what to do. She's asking the staff to keep the chairs a certain distance apart. If this episode feels familiar to you, it should. As Emily makes a fat joke, Rory shows up in her pretty dress. Emily yells at one of the cater waiters to look at Rory. She makes the man tell Rory she's beautiful. Rory soaks in the compliments. Richard is worried that the bartenders aren't using proper martini glasses, but stops to compliment how lovely his granddaughter looks tonight. Emily says that her hairdresser is upstairs in her bedroom, and if Rory went up there, she could get her hair done, "just for kicks." Richard says he's got downstairs under control, so Emily grabs Rory's hand and skips upstairs.
Lane comes home to find a very upset mfTL, who can't stop thinking about the hellhounds who will feast on his innards. MfTL says that MamaLane sees everything and knows everything, and that it's not cool, nor rock-and-roll. He says he's not that guy, and that he doesn't "do" parents, and that nobody ever takes him home to meet the parentals for a reason. He says he's a back seat, "get in the closet," jump out the window kind of guy. Lane is confused at first, but figures out that Lane 2.0 ratted on her. Lane apologizes profusely and promises that it'll never happen again: "I will take care of the hellhounds, too." MfTL leaves to go walk by a church.
Lorelai is disappointed to find that Luke's flatware is the same stuff from the diner. Man, the snobbiness in this episode. He bought those forks, bitch! Lorelai threatens to tell Dr. Phil that Luke isn’t keeping his work life and home life separate. She pets his head as Luke laughs and continues slaving over the stove for Lorelai. There's a frantic knocking at the door. Luke runs to answer it. It's T.J. He's upset about a fight he and Liz just got into. He yells that women make you crazy, how they burrow into your head and you can't get them out. "Women suck!" he shouts, and then says hello to Lorelai. He says he and Liz had a huge, monster, wammo fight. Luke tries to push him out the door, but it doesn't work. T.J.'s screaming that he's in escarow and this is terrible. Luke tells T.J. he's in the middle of something right now and that this isn't a good time. T.J. doesn't care. Luke asks Lorelai to go stir the sauce, and Lorelai says she can't because she can't cook. She's not good with spoons unless there's ice cream on the end. Luke kind of lunges toward Lorelai, so she runs away to stir the sauce. T.J. complains to Luke that Liz yells at this really loud register that could hurt dogs. Lorelai asks how fast she's supposed to be stirring. Luke tells Lorelai to stir, and T.J. to go back home. Lorelai worries that the sauce is bubbling and turning brown. She says her powers to ruin food are amazing. One time she was watching The Barefoot Contessa, and when a soufflé fell, the Contessa looked at the screen and asked, "Gilmore, is that you?" I'd call Lorelai a princess here, and say that she's just being lazy, but I've seen the same food fears in Djb. I asked him to stir the cookie dough, and he was pretty nervous about it, but I told him he could handle it, and then he broke my wooden spoon in the dough. Then the cookies came out strangely crispy, even though I've made chocolate chip cookies many times. Djb blames himself for the entire thing. So when Lorelai is insistent that her work in the kitchen will only ruin Luke's meal, I know where she's coming from. T.J. asks Luke if he can hang out quietly in the corner, promising to be like a church mouse. Luke goes back to the stove, where Lorelai whines that she's getting carpal tunnel. "I got it," ever-patient Luke says. T.J. cries. Luke tells Lorelai that T.J. needs a minute. T.J. sobs.