Episode Report Card Deborah: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Bully For You
By Deborah | Season 1 | Episode 11 | Aired on 12.11.2003
Joan's at school reading a book called Play Safe: The Art of Self-Defense when Goth God comes up and comments, "I wouldn't worry about self-defense." Joan: "Then why the psycho mission? Because I didn't sign up for martyrdom." Actually, you didn't sign up for any of this, as I recall. Goth God: "Joan. Have I ever endangered you?" Well, there was that one little incident where the murderer was stalking her and tried to abduct her...Joan: "Well, you never told me to ask evil out on a date before." Goth God is taking an oversized art book out of his bag; it's called Lost Souls. He tells her, "'Evil' is not a word to use lightly. It's only the darkest end of a broad spectrum." Joan: "You mean like...light?" Goth God: "Exactly like light. Nobody's born in total darkness." The camera shows some artwork of grotesque monsters and demons in the pages of the book. He continues, "Most of you live on the gray end of the spectrum...a lie here, and there. Jealousy. Wrath. But you only get to absolute evil by doing one thing after another until eventually you're transformed." Like Michael Jackson. Goth God turns some pages of the book, letting his fingers drift over the depictions of various lost souls. Joan: "Like...into a monster?" He says, "A monster is a creature with no consciousness. They're extremely rare, but they do exist." Yeah, and they work for Fox "News." Joan asks if he's watched the news: "I'm not sure they're so rare." Goth God says, "Almost everybody has some light somewhere. And light is always worth fighting for." Joan: "Okay, so I'm supposed to find Ramsay's...light." Goth God says: "I just want you to listen and observe. Be present." That is exactly what Buddhist nun Pema Chödrön is telling me in the book of hers I'm reading right now (When Things Fall Apart). Joan: "That's it?" Goth God doesn't answer, except by handing her the book, and he leaves.
When Joan gets home, she sees her parents drinking coffee at the dining room table. There's a plate for her, covered with tin foil, but all the rest of the dishes have been cleared away. Joan looks at them and says, "I have stuff to do." Helen calmly invites her to have a seat. Joan sighs, knowing what's coming. She sits. Will says that they want her to have a social life. Helen says they love to see her making friends and going out on dates. Will says they want her to see people who are good for her. Joan asks them to stop speaking in code: "Will you just say that Ramsay freaks you out?" Helen: "Ramsay freaks us out." Joan thinks they're going to prevent her from going to the dance. Helen says they definitely want her to go. Joan: "Just not with him." Will says it's a matter of her safety. Joan says her father hasn't even met him. Will: "No, but I know he has a juvenile record." Helen: "And I spoke to Chadwick..." Joan interjects, "Oh my God, I'd rather you guys just say no than go around spying on people!" Helen says she understands the appeal of somebody who breaks all the rules. Clearly she got over that. Will could be the "Straight Edge" poster boy. Joan: "Mom, this is not me being hot for some guy on a motorcycle." Will asks her to please explain what it is, then. Joan: "I don't know! Maybe he's like...trapped...in all these stories that people tell about him. Maybe what he needs is for someone to give him a chance...and like...have some faith." Will and Helen clearly don't know what to make of that. Man, I don't envy people with children most of the time, and I never envy people with teenagers, ever. Look how hard it is to be a good parent. Will and Helen are loving, patient, reasonable people who try to listen to their children at least some of the time, and look at what a struggle it is. They look at each other for a moment, and Helen makes a snap decision, "Okay, but there is no getting in cars with him. At all." Will: "You can meet him there, but stay in sight of your mother at all times." Joan says fine and asks to be dismissed. Helen: "Sure."