Episode Report Card Miss Alli: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Antebellum? I hardly even know 'em!
By Miss Alli | Season 8 | Episode 2 | Aired on 10.03.2005
Paolos hit the Basin and get the Roadblock clue. DJ takes it, and apparently in response for saying, "Take your time, relax," Mama gets hit with another exasperated "Ma, please!" They're all just lovely. DJ hits up some folks, but has no luck. Sharon Gadzooski, however, finds a real live "spy," so she gets her briefcase and the next clue. She reads it, and it sends them to Welbourne Manor a "historic antebellum home" in Middleburg, Virginia. It's 49 miles or so, so says Phil. Sharon runs the clue back to her team.
DJ Ice Ice Paolo continues freaking out.
The Weavers hit the Roadblock in third place, and Rebecca takes it for her team. The unhappy Paolos watch as Sharon returns and the pinks take off for Middleburg. "We're just kickin' aaaass, ladies!" Sharon says. I need no more of that.
Rebecca and DJ are still doing the dance of The Sky Is Blue. She hits a real spy first, and -- you guessed it -- she shrieks all the way back. They leave for Middleburg. Elsewhere, DJ finally gets his briefcase swapped, and because the guy who gives it to him is African-American, DJ decides that "I love you, my brother" is the thing to say. Shut. Up. He runs back to his family.
The Schroeders show up, and Dad takes the Roadblock, saying, "I'll do it. Because it might be hard." Eeew. The Paolos finally leave. Good riddance. They take a moment to note the Pentagon. For some reason.
Mark Schroeder goes up to a woman in a black suit. "The sky is blue." She fucks with him a little bit by pausing, but then she just walks away. "I think her panties are too tight," he says. I would pause to note the lameness of that line, except I'm too busy being impressed with him for not making a joke about how he bets it's that time of the month, because that's the only thing that would have been more hysterically inventive.
At the wrong reflecting pool, they're letting Carissa throw a coin in and make a wish. For the clue. Hee. The Bransens are still looking, too, and the Tonyas are noting that Dad can't run around with them quite as much as they'd like. Wally interviews that he's been surprised that he's not as fit as he thought, and he hopes not to let the Tonyas down.
At the Tidal Basin, we have the Aiellos and Linzes arriving. SIL David and Nick take the Roadblock for their respective teams.
Papa Schroeder walks up to a white-haired gentleman and says, "Hey, Pops. The sky is blue." "Pops"? Rather than give Papa Schroeder the kick in the balls he deserves, "Pops" hands him the briefcase he needs. On his way back to the clue, Mark passes Nick and David, telling them they "look dashing together." He is much more impressed with his own smart-assitude than I am, I will tell you that much. Papa Schroeder returns to the fold, and they leave in fourth place.