Episode Report Card M. Giant: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT I Got the Digits
By M. Giant | Season 4 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.17.2005
PMHC nervously enters the Undal Office and squirms under the Veep's "glare" for a moment. "General Thomas just told me we're missing a nuclear warhead," the Veep snits. PMHC confirms it. The Veep bitches about the satellites missing the hijacking, but PMHC makes the totally reasonable argument that "it's mountain terrain at night." Between Illinois and Iowa? Okay, there's the Mississippi River Valley, and there's the Great Plains, both of which are arguably the opposite of mountains. You can climb to any rooftop in Moline and see fricking Denver. I guess the Veep didn't make many Midwestern whistle stops during the campaign, because instead of calling PMHC on his statement, he asks what happens if they don't catch ImhoTerror. PMHC assures him that it's going to be difficult for ImhoTerror to leave the L.A. area. The Veep scoffs that it's also "difficult to shoot down Air Force with one of our own stealth fighters, but he managed to do that." The Veep even freaks that ImhoTerror's "gonna come after me next." PMHC says there's no indication of that, which the Veep rightly (if bitchily) argues is irrelevant. He'd be perfectly correct to point out that they haven't had an indication of anything ImhoTerror's done all day until ten minutes before he did it. PMHC keeps almost all of the contempt for his boss out of his voice as he slowly explains that the head of Secret Service is on his way. The Veep looks a little embarrassed by his own outburst. Don't feel bad, Veep. Just because you acted like a baby doesn't mean you were wrong.
Curtis and his posse are escorting Prado into CTU, less than ten minutes after leaving the Marina. I totally have this CTU triangulation thing under control now. I'm totally serious. Lispy Skip looks up with murder in his eyes. "That's the bastard Curtis caught at the Marina," he growls at Potato Face. "The one who's helping the terrorists." Since when does Lispy Skip say "bastard?" ["Also, 'the one'? Now he's going all Lispy Harry?" -- Sars] Potato Face barely notices Skip's jarring shift in character. "I'd like to get him in a room for a few minutes. He'd talk to me in about two seconds," Skip snarls. That's a tweak there at all the shlubby Joe Sixpacks out there who think that the only reason the war on terror isn't over yet is because they aren't in charge of it. When in fact it's abundantly obvious that the only thing that a chiseled bad-ass like Prado would be saying to lumpen, low-blood-sugar Skip after two seconds is, "Quit bleeding on me." In any case, Skip's remark gets Potato Face's attention. "Oh, you want to hurt him to get revenge for your mother dying. I can understand that." Oh, still bucking for that promotion to Narrator, Potato Face? I can understand that.
Curtis hands Prado off to the Redshirts and confers with Soul Patch. Prado, it turns out, is an ex-Marine with no criminal record, but over the last five years he has no record of employment. "Which means he's a criminal or a mercenary," Curtis concludes. I wonder if I can count the time I spent as a freelance writer as being a "mercenary." That would look awesome on my résumé. In any case, Curtis is off to question Prado.