Episode Report Card Keckler: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Like sands through my beer glass
By Keckler | Season 1 | Episode 24 | Aired on 05.07.2002
In the shuttle bay, Osama Bin Dribblin' asks Reed, "How many?!" "Eighty-nine, there were only eighty-nine Suliban, not thousands," Reed says. "Hmm," Osama Bin Dribblin' rumbles. "And the army you defeated?" "I would hardly call it an army, it was more like a few dozen prison guards," Reed says, "and to be honest, the whole plan was my idea, so you really should have kidnapped me, not that fool of a captain." Since Mathra was attempting to explain his math to me at that point, it's possible that Reed really said that the army didn't put up much of a fight instead of that last bit. T'Pol says that while Quantum is "an excellent starship captain," he's hardly the Jedi knight Osama Bin Dribblin''s been led to believe. T'Pol's shown us before that Vulcans can lie. Osama Bin Dribblin' asks about Quantum's "legendary desert tactics," and Reed explains that he's the tactical officer on the ship and he has no experience in desert warfare. Where's Norman Schwarzkopf when you really need him?
Osama Bin Dribblin' gripes that all his trouble has been for nothing, and T'Pol asks what about their people. Osama Bin Dribblin' tells her that they have better sensors that he does, so he's certain they'll find them soon. T'Pol responds to his lack of concern by reminding him that the Torothans are jamming their sensors to the point of uselessness. "And the Torothans are threatening to fire on us if we launch a shuttle pod," T'Pol finishes. Reed wants to know how Osama Bin Dribblin' reached them undetected. "There was a narrow gap in their orbital detection grid. It occurs once every forty-six minutes, but it is only open for less than one minute," Osama Bin Dribblin' informs them. Reed says he's going to need all the data on that grid; Osama Bin Dribblin' laughs, saying he's going to need a lot more than that: "The maneuvers are extremely difficult -- it took us years to learn them!" Reed snips that he's "a quick study," but Osama Bin Dribblin' tells him he'll be blasted out of the sky before he reaches the atmosphere. "With you at the helm, our chances would improve," T'Pol states, but Osama Bin Dribblin' says he doesn't have time; his men are waiting for him. Reed tells him tough noogies, as he's the reason Trip and Quantum are lost in the desert. Osama Bin Dribblin' bellows that they aren't his responsibility, and starts to go down to his sh'pod. T'Pol stops him, saying, "You are mistaken. The Torothans believe we've joined your cause. If Captain Archer and Commander Tucker are apprehended, they'll undoubtedly be treated as members of your clan. They will become victims of the same oppression you've been fighting all these years. You should feel as responsible for those two men as you do for your own."