Episode Report Card Lauren S: A+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The One Where George Admits It
By Lauren S | Season 4 | Episode 3 | Aired on 10.10.2007
What it means this time, at least, is dealing with a sullen kid and his mom, who insists he is on drugs. He vehemently denies it, but she cites his lethargy, irritability, mood swings, and dropping grades as proof. Alex says they'll run a series of tests, but she thinks a drug test is the only important one; she's directing this and all her other questions to "Dr. Shales," since she assumes he's in charge. He jumps right in and starts waxing eloquent about his own children and the power of a mother's instinct.
Ever the professional, Izzie doesn't seem to be working so much as outright stalking George, and she pulls him into Really Old Guy's room to ask what happened the night before. Izzie does a lot of sighing and looking put-upon as George explains that he didn't do it, and then babbles about how mad he is at her but how much she helped him through and then how mad he is because "Who marries someone who just buried their father?" I love Callie (or Old Callie, at least) but...it's not a bad question. Kids, don't marry people at the most vulnerable and needy moment of their lives. Izzie's interns then pile in to the room despite her yelling at them that she needed a minute, and they gawk admiringly at George and his Intern Skillz. He flees, so Izzie starts rounds right there. She has Graciella, one of her outspoken female interns, give the bullet on Really Old Guy. She points out that he has a name, but Bad Mood Izzie snaps that it's "Really Old Guy" and tells her to catch up. He's been there a year, which is very convenient for our interns who wanted a quiet spot to lunch, and Izzie blithely runs through his normal treatment: labs and dialysis. No one is more shocked than Izzie when Really Old Guy himself tells her not to bother with dialysis, since "I plan to die today. So it won't be necessary." Izzie, blissfully, is speechless. He continues, "And while I think 'Really Old Guy' is charming, in a neglected-patient kind of way, my name is Charlie. Charlie Yost." Izzie smiles, and her interns laugh; it does certainly appear that they are laughing at her instead of with her.
Mere and Alex show up at the door, as news travels father than staph infections in this hospital. Alex asks if it's true that Really Old Guy woke up. Izzie says snottily, "He has a name." This would be easy, but kind of classic, comedy if it weren't selfish, psychotic Izzie delivering the line. Charlie chimes in, "And tomorrow you can call me Really Dead Guy." Iz examines him, commenting to Alex and Mere that she doesn't think he knows who they are. Charlie gaily corrects, "Sure I do! That's Meredith. She and the brain doctor are always running hot and cold. And you're Alex! You still got a thing for that old patient of yours?" Dude, if you've got to be semi-comatose, this is the place to do it. It's like a 24-hour soap opera for your unconscious entertainment. "I was semi-comatose, Blondie. I could still hear you guys." She orders labs, telling him his kidneys might be working, and he declares, "That means I've got two things to do today. Take a pee, and die." But Izzie tells him she's sure he's not going to die.
Richard comes up to Mark and tells him, "Functional muscle transfer." It's a procedure about which he was reading. Mark translates the Med Speak to explain, "Nerve graft." Then he says it's too risky, while George watches the whole conversation curiously. Richard says her currently planned surgery won't leave her able to talk the same, and that she loves to talk more than anyone. George pipes up and asks what a functional muscle transfer is. Richard tells him he won't find it in any books since it's cutting-edge, and hands him a paper on the subject. They'd move nerves from her leg to tongue. But Mark points out only half a dozen of the procedures have been done. It's all very good cop/bad cop. Chief says sometimes they've got to push the envelope. George, actually a voice of reason, asks why it would be better to do something they've never done before, and asks if they even know how to do it. Richard thinks he's saying they're old dogs who can't learn new tricks. George denies it while they say they still have it and begin conspiring. Mark once did a similar procedure on an elbow. Richard: "Elbow, tongue, that's pretty close!" Despite the fact that elbows don't get stuck to flagposts in the cold, they high-five and decide to go ahead with it, and Richard again asserts that age is just a number. That's what I want -- someone to perform a surgery on me because of a dare.