Episode Report Card Sars: C | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Have yourseeeeeelf a greeeeeeeeeasy little Christmaaaaaaas
By Sars | Season 4 | Episode 9 | Aired on 11.28.2000
ANYway. Dawson says smugly that Gretchen's Tarantino reference "completely prov[es] his point even more [sic]" -- huh? -- because "A.I. Brooks was way ahead of his time." Gretchen says all buck-up-little-camper that she likes Dawson "like this," all worked up about the film, and Dawson rolls his eyes and wonders aloud why Brooks quit making movies, and Gretchen says she could ask Dawson the same thing. She rambles on about how, when she left for college, Dawson had moviemaking on the brain, and now "film is like this unfinished project you've sort of stuffed in your closet." She goes on to say in her best Behind The Music-announcer voice, "Which begs the question [AGH!], whatever happened to the talented young filmmaker Dawson Leery? Why did he stop, and where is he now?" During the requisite tertiary-character ego massage, Dawson looks pensive; then he laughs with that off-putting oh-you-have-to-say-that-but-I-still-know-it's-true face he wears whenever he hears praise of himself.
Oh, God. I've only gotten up to the credits? Sigh. Credits. Cat in dunk tank.
And while the commercials roll, let me take a moment to refer you all to A Dictionary Of Modern American Usage, written in fine acerbic style by Bryan A. Garner. It makes a great Christmas/Chanukah/Kwanzaa/Winter Solstice gift for the grammarian in your life. Here's what Garner has to say on "begging the question":
Begging the question does not mean "evading the issue" or "inviting the obvious questions," as some mistakenly believe. The proper meaning of begging the question is "basing a conclusion on an assumption that is as much in need of proof or demonstration as the conclusion itself." The formal name for this logical fallacy is petitio principii. Following [is a] classic example…"Reasonable people are those who think and reason intelligently." (This statement begs the question, "What does it mean to think and reason intelligently?") [Boldface and italics Garner's; you can find the entry on pp. 77-78.]
In other words, to beg the question is to use a tautology as a proof. In other other words, shut up, writers.
Yacht Club. Non-Liz Non-Claiborne snipes at Joey "Ivy Beleaguer" Potter that she's not paying her to study for her GED. Joey snipes back that she's early, so she can spend the time before her shift starts as she likes, and why can't NLNC keep in mind that Joey and Drue go to the same school? NLNC simpers that she'd rather forget; she adds that she saw Bessie at the drugstore that day, but she gets Bessie's name wrong and throws in an Abby Morgan-esque comment about Bessie obviously not buying contraceptives, like, stow it, NLNC. Joey sneers, "It's Bessie." NLNC doesn't care. A middle-aged man approaches and asks NLNC if everything is ready for Saturday night, and NLNC oozes yes, of course, "fully stocked and fully staffed," just about to tell "little Joey Potter here" that she has to work Saturday, fishcakes. Joey starts to object, but NLNC cuts her off to exposition that Mr. Kubelik is hosting a "networking party" for promising applicants to Worthington, and Joey had better show up to "wait on them." After much unamusing blather, Joey finally makes it clear to NLNC that she'll attend the party "as a guest." NLNC cackles in disbelief all Cruella DeVille until Mr. Kubelik asks, "Wait -- you're Josephine Potter?" He compliments Joey on her essay, tells NLNC that Joey's "one of our most promising applicants," and instructs NLNC to give Joey the night off and seat her at his table. NLNC tries to cover for her earlier bitchitude, yammering that she doesn't know who she'll get to replace Joey since "she's such a shining member of our wait staff," and Joey suggests Drue. NLNC smiles coldly.