Episode Report Card M. Giant: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT ImHoudini
By M. Giant | Season 4 | Episode 19 | Aired on 04.24.2005
Potato Face reacts quickly, snatching up the laptop and bustling Miss Iletech out of the room. At that moment a hit man comes in and opens fire on them, hoping to prevent us from wondering why Missile Tech didn't just bring his laptop with him to Iowa in the first place. The hit man misses, of course, but now Potato Face and Miss Iletech are holed up in the laundry room, shoving the washer and dryer against the door. Maybe the hit man will give up and go home now. But no, he stands outside, putting round after round in the door. "Do you have a gun?" a terrified Miss Iletech asks. "I work with computers," Potato Face panics, getting on her cell phone with Lispy Skip. Upon learning the situation, Skip looks around for help. Fortunately, Kiefer and Curtis have just arrived. Skip gives Potato Face's location (1482 Franklin, Los Feliz, although I think that's actually in West Hollywood). Kiefer gets on the speakerphone and gets a quick update from Potato Face while Curtis tries to organize a rescue team. Meanwhile, the hit man is still shooting at the door. How many rounds does he have in that thing, anyway? He must be able to reload faster than a video game character. Potato Face hangs up, despite Kiefer's telling her not to. By now, the hit man has shot enough holes in the door to punch through it and reach around for the doorknob. Seeing this, the women head out the window. They're gone by the time the hit man enters. Think he'll give up and go home now?
At CTU, Kiefer's calling in the LAPD, while Curtis learns that the nearest tactical team is fifteen minutes away. "Too long!" snaps Kiefer. I'm not sure if he means that's too long to save Potato Face, or if it's too long to be plausible, since Potato Face got there from CTU in about five minutes. Without sirens.
At 1:58:14, the imperiled women run around the house and clamber into the CTUmobile, which was fortunately left unlocked. But Potato Face can't find the ignition key in the car. It's probably in the pocket of one of her dead wingmen. She calls CTU again, and Skip puts her on speaker. Kiefer tells her help is ten minutes away, and she repeats his assessment that it's too long. If they go as fast as the last five minutes did, she'll be fine. "Just try and stay calm," he says. "Tell me where you are." Well, she's sitting in a CTUmobile, and unbeknownst to her there's a guy standing right next to the passenger window who's raising his gun and firing it right at Miss Iletech's head. Luckily, the glass is bulletproof, so they're okay for the moment. Think he'll go home now? Potato Face asks if she can hotwire the CTUmobile and Kiefer says no, but there are weapons inside the car. By now the hit man has walked around to the front of the car and switched to a sawed-off shotgun, which he's repeatedly firing at the windshield. You'd think a neighbor would notice all this commotion. Potato Face says there's a gun in the back, but it's behind a divider grid with a combination lock. You'd think she would have noticed that on the ride over, when she was in the back seat. Anyway, she needs the combination. "I'm on it," says Curtis, as the hit man tries to shoot through the CTUmobile's hood and grille, with no success. Think he'll go home now? Oh, good, he's leaving. They shrink up into a splitscreen window.