Episode Report Card Erin: A | 1 USERS: B YOU GRADE IT Did we really need another Mr. Sloane?
By Erin | Season 4 | Episode 15 | Aired on 04.12.2005
Prison Cells of Recovered Chocoholics. Katya asks Syd if she found the message. Syd says she did, and that she uncovered payments to the assassin who tried to kill her. The records exonerate Irina, and Katya wants Sydney to make it right again. "My mother traced the bank payments to their source," says Sydney grimly. "She discovered who it was." "In that case," says Katya, sitting down heavily, "if I'd gotten the message in time…" "She'd still be alive," says Sydney, probably realizing that if she hadn't had Katya's ass put in jail, her mother might still be around to mess with her head on a regular basis. "Who is it?" snaps Katya. "Before I tell you," says Sydney, "you must promise me: Nadia can never know." Yeah. Like she's not gonna find out SOMETIME. My dad used to hide his porno mags from us kids and we always found 'em. Kids just…know stuff.
Jack's Office of Radioactive Isotopes and Mutant Donkey Ears. Marshall enters and tells Jack that he may be very sick and should be taking a number of tests to determine just how sick he may be. Jack doesn't care to discuss it. Marshall doesn't care that Jack doesn't care. "Dammit, you may not care what happens to you, but what happens to you affects other people. Sydney, for example. Have you ever thought about that?" Jack has this look on his face that's like, damn! When'd Marshall learn to yell at me like that? And does this mean I can have him killed now? "You need to see a doctor now!" Marshall finishes, only to turn and see Sneaky Sloane in the doorway all, do we have a problem here, gentlemen? Marshall leaves, his mission not accomplished. Sloane enters and says, "Jack? Is there something we need to discuss? Jack just sucks on a radioactive lemon and glows pink and green.
Ovary Electric. Syd's relaxing at home when the doorbell rings. It's Vaughn, rogue agent no more. They sweetly say hi to each other and then hug. Aw. He looks exhausted. She kisses him gently on the cheek. "He's dead, Syd," says Vaughn. "My father. He's been dead all along. I think." He goes on to say that he just suddenly realized that his father would never have left him and his mother, not for anything. "The man that I knew could never have walked away from the people he loved." "How did you know?" asks Syd. "'Cuz I couldn't either," he says with a sweet smile. Syd looks down all, aw! My boyfriend loves me! Vaughn ruins the moment by saying, "It was Sloane. I should have seen it all along. I swear to god, Syd. I am gonna kill that son of a bitch." Syd just looks at him for a second. "Come inside," she says. "There's something I have to tell you." Heh. They're going after Uncle Inappropriate, y'all.
Speaking of Sloane, he's sitting at his computer when Jack enters and informs him that Vaughn's returned. Sloane's all, uh, that's nice. Where was he? Jack's all, uh, that's for me to know and you to find out and he retrieved the coil and that's all that really matters, isn't it? Jack then says that Dix ran into some interference abroad, but that he had his vest on, so he's okay. Well, good thing we started the episode with his fake death, then. Jack says that Sloane was right; they shouldn't have let Dixon go on that mission. Sloane asks about the artifact, and Jack tells him it's secured. "Unless there's something else, I'm headed out, you creepy, sneaky little shit," says Jack. "There isn't," says Sloane, "you uptight priggish radioactive circus freak. Have a good night, jackass." "You too, you teeny tiny miniscule little man." I could be guessing on the subtext here.