Episode Report Card Couch Baron: A | 155 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT A Kiss Before Dying
By Couch Baron | Season 1 | Episode 20 | Aired on 2000.01.14
Chair. After a few warm-up memories, we see Crichton's whole intimate interaction with Gilina in "PK Tech Girl." We focus in on them making out, with Gilina's back to us. But then things change: Crais appears, and tells Crichton he's glad he's enjoying his stay with "[them]." Gilina turns -- but it's not her; it's a different blonde woman in a tech uniform. Crais calls a halt as Crichton sniggers and Scorpius and Niem are like, "Awkward." And when you've got the king and queen of bondage outfits saying that, it's a socially embarrassing situation indeed. Niem resumes the extraction of the false memory, and therein, Crais thanks Crichton. He explains a truckload of information we know to be true from the Maldis episode -- he was a conscript, and even though he rose through Peacekeeper ranks on "wits and hatred," some doors were always closed to him. (That speech is going by so fast I couldn't even pause to make a "half right" comment.) Crais finishes up by producing a chip and intoning, "With this wormhole information you've given me, I now have the power to rise where I should be." Aptly put -- up shit's creek is both where you're going and where you belong. Crais, starting to panic, says that Crichton made that up, but Scorpius evenly says that that's impossible. Crais tries punching Crichton, earning him another delectably contemptuous look from Scorpius, and then Crichton, his brain catching up, asks Crais if the game is up. He tells Scorpius that Crais learned of the existence of wormholes when Crichton arrived from his galaxy. "I gave him the information disk in exchange for my life." Of course, were this true, the flaw is that I don't think Crais would have stuck to the agreement and let Crichton live. He may be many things, but apart from the midsection, he's not soft. Crais chokes Crichton into the commercial break.