Episode Report Card Pamie: B+ | 145 USERS: C+ YOU GRADE IT Girls Gone Mild
By Pamie | Season 4 | Episode 17 | Aired on 2004.04.13
Paris, Rory, Louisa, and Fraulein watch boys at play in the pool. Paris complains that she's starving, and is sick of vending-machine food. One of the boys falls into the water, splashing Paris, who freaks out like the Wicked Witch of the East. Rory is on the phone with Lorelai. These girls know how to party. Rory compares the battering rams the boys in the pool are using to giant Q-Tips. Lorelai says she can't get the visual out of her head. Rory says she hasn't had a drink yet, and that she's having a good time. As Lorelai babbles about something, Rory smiles at a boy who has the body of CuteDean and the face of Jess. Lorelai asks whether Rory's pause is due to something cute walking by. Rory is a little thrown, what with the boy smiling at her at all, and stammers that she has to get off the phone. Louisa, Fraulein, and Paris are all smiles. They compliment Rory's taste and ask the guy's name. Louisa and Fraulein are disappointed to see that the blonde twins are at the same pool party. They can't compete with the kissing twins -- two blondes in bikinis, eating lollipops. Louisa and Fraulein leave to find another pool. Paris suggests that Rory get a drink at the bar so that she can go talk to that guy. Rory says she doesn't need to. Paris says that flirting appears to be an important part of this Spring Break ritual, and since she's spoken for, she'll have to live vicariously through Rory. Paris hears of a banana-eating contest and leaves to get some real food before Rory can explain what that probably means.
Upstairs at the bar, Rory grabs a Red Bull. I guess her WPM just ain't high enough yet, huh? Rory asks JessDean if he knows what those giant Q-Tips are called. He doesn't. He asks if that's going to count against him. Rory says it won't. Someone calls him, using a name that sounds like "Shellmack," which is about the unsexiest thing anybody has every shouted, and he leaves. There's a sound of disappointed boys as Paris stomps past: "Excuse me for thinking a banana-eating contest was about eating a banana!"
And now, like in the middle of a Young Ones episode, we just have The Shins play for, like, ever. Long enough for me to think, "That lead singer looks like if Glark were twenty years older." And then, "And the guy in the hoodie looks like Chris Parnell." Long enough for me to miss Rooney, and I don't even like Rooney, but The O.C. made us all think we loved Rooney for an hour, due to the constant repetition of the word "Rooney." It glommed on to our love of Ferris Bueller, and Principal Rooney. It made us forgive Andy Rooney, and give that Mickey Rooney another try. But with this scene, I don't even spend a nanosecond pondering the space between my knee and my foot, because they don't even tell us that we're watching The Shins. Is that classier? Perhaps. But it does seem terribly random. And this club, with its twenty kids dancing while wearing striped shirts, is the lamest place in Florida. And man, is that saying a lot. Anyway, let me take this nice recapping break, brought to me by The Shins. Thanks, guys. A little birdie with the initials C.C.C. just sent a copy of their latest album to the house. I do appreciate it, as does Stee, whom it was intended for. Do, dee, do, dee, doo. Shins are still playing. Second verse, same as the first.