I know it's not a good sign when I put off doing the recap for as long as possible. When I like the show, I don't mind watching it again. But I've been dreading this episode, mostly for the speed-folding scene. I don't want to have to watch that wackiness again. I've figured out the main reason I don't like this show: I don't think Jaye is funny. I think the supporting characters are great, and I find a real sensitivity and humor to them. But Jaye seems so far away, I can't feel anything for her. I don't know if that's because of the actress playing her or because Jaye has no real passion or drive. I can't relate to her because she has offered up nothing about herself. She sits and mopes and complains and avoids, but I don't know why, or what she'd prefer to do, or why she chose philosophy for a degree, or what she thinks about working at Wonderfalls, or if she really likes the bartender or is just happy to have someone paying attention to her. In the first episode, she came across as totally asexual, what with her pawning the flirty EPS guy off to her sister and her interest in the bartender (whose name, we learn in this episode, is Eric), being mostly due to the fact that he might be a fellow drunk. If she were a drunk, that'd be something to latch on to, something to watch and follow, something to see unfold. But this is like Jaye's a pinball and we watch the pinball go from interesting person to interesting person, and Jaye learns nothing about herself so we learn nothing about her so we learn nothing from an entire episode, other than that people can be quirky. There is a truly good show in here somewhere, but until they figure out who they want Jaye to be, it's going to be hard for us to get swept up in it. They might also want to figure out how much quirk their world believably has, because the rules are constantly bending. How much camp? How much raunch? I am a girl who loves John Waters, so please bring on the campy raunch, but at least be consistent. This is why everybody loved Young Americans. It knew what it was, it wasn't apologetic, and it gave everybody really crappy writing teamed with absolutely gorgeous people and soap-opera plots. It was what it was and that was it. I wish this show knew what it was and stuck with it. Then at least it'd be easier to root for or dismiss. Get off the fence, Wonderfalls!
We open with Willam Sadler's narration. He's reading the author's bio for his wife, Karen Tyler. She has a new travel guide, Thumbing Through the Finger Lakes. We see Karen's picture on a bookstore window, to the bio William is reading. Then the photo comes to life, and scares us momentarily. Then she morphs into Karen at a restaurant, watching with pride as her husband, Darrin, continues to read. We pan over to him as he reads the blurb about himself (he's a noted physician). FYI, he's also a forum visitor. Shout-out to Bill Sadler. Pan over to the smirky and self-congratulatory Sharon Tyler, who is an immigration attorney and partner at her firm. Son Aaron Tyler "is the youngest non-Asian to win the Fulton Scholarship in Literature." Hope he uses some of that money to tame his wild brows, or Karen's going to have to do another travelogue on her son's head. "Jaye, a daughter, is twenty-four." Pan over to pouty Jaye. She immediately makes an "Uh...?"
Darrin kisses his wife and says that this might be her best book yet. Everybody's dressed nicely except Jaye, who's in a t-shirt, but then we find out that they're at her bar, so that's weird, that they're eating at her bar, isn't it? Darrin reminds Jaye to congratulate her mother on her achievement. Jaye congratulates her mom thusly: "Uh, how come I only get five words on your flap?" Karen explains that it's a blurb and that she only gets a certain amount of words. Jaye brats that Aaron got twenty-six words and she only got five. "And one of mine's a digit." Darrin gets best line of the night here: "Jaye, sweetheart? Don't parse the blurb." Jaye tells Sharon that she got nineteen. Sharon wrinkles her brow and whines that she counted twenty-two. Karen says that Aaron and Sharon have lived longer, so they get more words. "Achieved more," Jaye corrects. Karen says that Aaron and Sharon have had more opportunities, and that Jaye's time will come. Darrin says that they're all looking forward to expanding Jaye's sentence. You guys, Jaye's family is so nice. They really do care about her, and they go out of their way to make her feel happy. I mean, this is Karen's big book release congrats dinner, and they do it at Jaye's watering hole so that she barely has to move off her drunk stool to bitch and moan about her blurb in her mom's book? Man. Jaye reminds her family that she graduated from Brown with a philosophy degree. "I might even still have it somewhere," she squints. Karen says to Darrin: "That is true. We're nearly finished paying for that, aren't we?" Awesome. Sharon offers an extra twelve words by saying that in addition to her philosophy degree, Jaye also works retail. Aaron says another five could go to mentioning that Jaye lives in a trailer park. Okay, two scenes with Aaron and both times he has to mention the trailer park. Time to expand the brother character. Jaye asks if she should be ashamed of her life. Someone's pager goes off, and all of Jaye's family members answer their individual technological dealies and excuse themselves from the table, offering each other rides to their important functions, leaving Jaye to wallow in her own booze, which she's more than happy to do. Jaye is wearing some kind of one fur sleeve and one upholstery sleeve. Man, that's ugly. She looks like a yeti.
Jaye and her non-matching cat-pelt arms stomp over toward her barstool. She bumps into a girl in pigtails who looks a little like Edie Brickell in the "What I Am" video. The girl apologizes twice as Jaye gives her an evil glare. Jaye heads over to her stool and sits. Flops. Pouts. Eric asks if that was her family. "Yep" is all she offers. Eric tells her she seems depressed. Suddenly? Jaye says she's not clincally depressed, but that her mother published another book and she only got five words in her bio blurb. Eric, thinking like any other normal person, excitedly asks, "You got mentioned in a blurb?" Suddenly, the big-mouthed bass on the wall says, "Hey!" and then there's a strange voice-over of Jaye going, "Oh, God." And then the fish says, "Get her words out." Jaye -- who apparently is now pretty used to objects talking to her all the time -- asks, "What do you care?" Eric, who is used to Jaye's caustic tone, answers, "Well, I think that's impressive." Jaye says it's actually four words and a digit. I think it might be two digits, but I'm not one to parse the blurb. Jaye is in uber-pout mode as she complains that her siblings got fifty-one collectively. Eric: "Digits?" Jaye: "Words." It's like they try the joke, and then they aren't sure if anyone got the joke, so they negate the joke with the correction.
Jaye's friend walks up here and says she didn't know Aaron was on a scholarship. I didn't know you knew Jaye's brother. Also: didn't catch your name yet. Jaye woes, "What if I only ever rate four words and a digit? What if by the time my mother's book comes out the sentence hasn't changed?" How about: "Jaye, 25, has entered rehab." Jaye takes a look at the unmoving mounted bass on the wall and then stands up, pouting near tears: "Or by then it'll say their youngest daughter was confined to a mental institution." And then Jaye leaves. Man, don't you hate friends like that? The ones who turn everybody's good news into their own worst sorrows? That someone's achievement is the reason to wallow in self-misery, full of that loathing that comes from wishing someone would just give you everything you wanted without your having to shed a molecule of your laziness? Hey Eric and unnamed friend? Jaye totally wants you to follow her out into the parking lot, where she'll throw something on the ground or punch a wall or suddenly be "too drunk to drive" and want you to hold her as she cries, telling her how she's better than everyone and that she's going to be super-famous someday because she's such an amazing person. I realize I'm filling in all kinds of character description for Jaye here, and really all she did was pout off her stool and leave her friends behind, but if they aren't going to give me more than "Jaye's mad that her family is successful and that she doesn't get more words in her mother's author blurb, even though there's nothing to say," then I have to play Make-Believe so I don't change the channel. I will fill in the subtext and backstory. I used to do it all the time. With Barbie dolls. When I was eight.
Jaye walks down the sidewalk outside The Barrel. We pull back to reveal a girl in a truck looking at the insides of a wallet with a flashlight. We see that it's Jaye's wallet. Jaye was born 1/22/80. The girl with the wallet and flashlight is Edie Brickell from earlier. She sees Jaye heading to her car and pulls out a large camera. Edie snaps a few photos as Jaye gets into her car, and dark, menacing, unrelenting music tells us that we need to be nervous.
Entertainment Weekly sure did spooge all over this show this week, didn't it? You know what other show they loved this much? Miss Match. Make of that what you will.
Establishing shots of Niagara Falls using photo proofs. Wonderfalls. Stereotypical Elderly Asian Man takes a snapshot of us with his enormous Nikon. He leaves the frame (smiling as those men are prone to do). More Asian tourists mill about the shop as Jaye complains that the shop is busy. Alec says that the boats aren't running because of the fog. Jaye says that it's called the "Maid of the Mist" for a reason. Jaye asks where Leslie is, since she's always whining about not getting enough hours. Alec says that's why Leslie quit last week. Ah, Leslie. We hardly knew ye. For no reason at all, Alec says they need more enviro-friendly plastic bags. He then gives a konnichiwa to an Asian customer.
Edie Brickell is back and finds Jaye. She stammers out an "Ex-ex-excuse me? I, I think this is y-y-yours?" Jaye's all, "Yeah! I was looking for that!" and then is startled to discover that it really is her wallet and not just some wallet she was planning on stealing from the stuttering do-gooder. Jaye says she didn't know it was missing. She opens the wallet. "Or that I had cash!" The girl stutters out a confession. She stole the wallet from Jaye last night. Her "v-van" broke down. She ran out of "m-money." As the homeless girl stutters, Jaye actually flinches and looks pained and embarrassed for this girl. Nice, Jaye. Jaye asks Edie if she put the eight bucks in the wallet. "It was all I h-had," the girl says. "I felt gi-gi-gi-gi-gi-gi-gi.." As she goes on like the stand-up on crutches from South Park, the stuffed chameleon behind her impatiently says to Jaye, "Get her words out!" Jaye whispers, "Oh! Get her words out!" ["Wow, where have I seen this plot line before?" -- Wing Chun] Today Jaye is wearing a sweater made out of Muppet fur. She finishes Edie's sentence, tells her it's no big deal, and asks if there's anyone she can call. Edie says that her parents live in Florida, but that they think she's in "C-c-c-c-c-c-c...." Canada? Jaye guesses the often-visited "Carolina." "C-c-c-c-c...." to Niagara, how about Canada? "Kansas? Colorado? Kentucky? Columbia? California?" Edie says Bingo. Her parents think she had a job waiting for her in California. "I can't get a job because I have a stuhhhh....a stuhhhh....a stuhhhhh." Jaye: "STD?" And right there I have to fight the impulse to turn off the show. "Stutter." Edie says she didn't want to be a burden because her parents have enough problems: "Dad's on an iron luuuuh...." Jaye figures that one out. Do they still have iron lungs? I think you should automatically call bullshit on anyone who says their father's on an iron lung. "My name's B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B..." Jaye sighs, sick and tired of this girl's vocal problems (I am too, but in a recapping kind of way), and stomps over to the named keychains, where she reads them off: "Bianca, Barlow, Betty." What kind of crazy keychain place is that? Half the time I can't find "Pam." "Barlow?" Anyway, Edie picks the first name Jaye said because she's full of shit and that makes me hate the stutter even more. Bianca's fine with her. Jaye is strangely pleased with herself for figuring out Bianca's name. Bianca apologizes and tries to leave, but Jaye stops her. "I can't let you give me your last eight dollars. Here's five back." Bianca is overwhelmed at Jaye's generosity.
Alec is pissed, because there's a line twenty deep at the counter while Jaye's off making f-f-f-f-friends. Bianca is upset that she got Jaye in t-t-t-t-trouble. She awkwardly turns to leave and knocks over a stack of three t-shits. Jaye looks pained. Frantically, Bianca picks up the t-shirts. I know that some of you don't watch the show and only read the recaps, so I want to add this disclaimer here: I didn't make this up. The camera then goes into speedy mode as Bianca folds the t-shirts correctly, like someone hit the Hurry-Up Machine from Out of Control. Guitar music plays and whip sounds are heard and somehow there are like, fifteen t-shirts even though we only see six. (For those of you who have already seen this episode, I'd like to point out that this makes absolutely no sense with this girl's character. So now we're supposed to think she's super gift shop girl, right? Like she's some All About Eve/Single White Femalewho wanted to work there all along and be Alec's favorite employee. Anyway, Alec is impressed with the "Gap corners" on Bianca's folding. Bianca says she's "unem-unem-unem-unem-unem" until the chameleon yells at Jaye to get her words out. Jaye tells Alec to hire Bianca to replace Leslie.
View-Master to a close-up of Alec holding up a nametag that says "Binky." He says it's temporary until they get her real one stitched. "Binky?" Jaye asks. In an extreme close-up, Binky says, "It's short for B-B-B-B..." Then loudly and impatiently, the chameleon says, "Get her words out." Jaye says she gets it; Binky and Alec look confused. Alec tells Binky that Jaye will train her: "Don't worry about her bark. She trained me and now I'm her boss." Alec tells Jaye not to worry about the folding, because Binky's got that down. Alec leaves, and Binky thanks Jaye for speaking up for her before and for not telling Alec she stole from her. "So," Jaye says, "in a way, I kind of helped you by getting your words out." Binky stammers a "yes." Jaye looks at the chameleon and says, "Oh. Okay." She asks Binky if she can count backwards, and ushers her offscreen.
Jaye's reading a magazine while Binky works the register, stammering up a storm as she counts back change. "Come again!" Binky yells at her customer. Jaye puts her arm around Binky. "Don't encourage them," she warns. Now there's a sign for last week's lion on the counter. Binky shouts that this is fun. She asks if Jaye wants to take over for a bit. Jaye says she can't, that she's not allowed, and that Binky's doing a really good job: "Like you've been at it your whole life, yet managed not to get your soul crushed." Binky looks pleased, and suggests that she dust the shelves, but Jaye explains that right now they have a really good even layer of dust. A customer asks where he'd find the Niagara Falls Motion Lamp. Jaye barely lifts her eyes or leaves her magazine to ask him if he saw it out there. He didn't. "Then we don't have 'em," she says, full of spite. She tells him to try the store down the street. The customer leaves, and Binky says she thought they were in the stockroom. Jaye says she just saved the company from a worker's comp situation. Binky seems grateful for Jaye's teachings.
Jaye closes down the shop. Binky thanks her for everything today, and says she doesn't feel tired at all. Jaye is so proud of herself for helping someone poor and dumb. Binky stammers that she's never had a mentor before. Jaye's little light turns on. A mentor. Jaye says she's "five-word blurb girl who lives in a trailer." Binky reminds her that she lives in a v-van. Jaye realizes this is a girl who can't outshine her. "What are your feelings on beer?" she asks her.
View-Master to The Barrel. Jaye and Binky shell an enormous bowl of peanuts as Jaye brags that this is more work than she's done all day. Eric interrupts to ask if that means business was slow. Jaye says it was normal, but that they finally hired some decent help. Jaye introduces Eric to Bianca, and says they'll both have a beer. "Y-yes, puh-please," Bianca says. Eric leaves to get the beer. Bianca says to Jaye, "He's cu-cu-cu....He's cu-cu-cu...." Jaye just waits for Bianca to finish her sentence. "He's...." Jaye says, "Cute." And then Eric walks up with the beer, but I guess we're supposed to think that Eric heard Jaye say the word "cute," and so she's mortified for some reason, even though why the hell would that faze her? Eric gives her a smile like they've already had sex and been dating for some time and asks her if there's anything else. Jaye gives him a smile back like they keep secrets from stuttering clerks all the time and says, "I'll let you know." This episode is a bit of a weird jump from the last one, huh? Eric leaves, and Jaye does that thing we haven't seen since Molly Ringwald wore bangle bracelets, where she looks around all excited and then bites her lower lip in amazement that Jake Ryan talked to her and was kind of flirty. Jaye then says to the immobile bass on the wall, "Okay, that was just tricky." Whatever.
View-Master. Maid of the Mist. Reverse shot.
Wonderfalls. Jaye prices a few boxes. Binky says to a customer, "Thank you for shopping at Wonderfalls." Jaye realizes something and walks over to her. She says that was perfect. "Polite, but detached, right?" Binky asks. Jaye says yes, but also that she's not stuttering. Also, her voice has gone up an octave. Binky and Jaye smile, because they've cured Binky's childhood stuttering, which as we all know from television, is always caused by a lack of self-esteem. Alec asks Binky why she didn't fold the t-shirts he told her to fold. Binky says that people messed them up again. Jaye goes wide-eyed as Alec exhales and asks to see Jaye for a minute. They walk three feet to the side to have a discussion. A customer walks up to Binky with a box and says she bought this yesterday and it doesn't work so she wants to exchange it, but before she leaves she has to see if the new one works so that she doesn't have this problem again. Whew. Exposition set up. Alec asks Jaye what she did to Binky. Jaye says she cured her. Binky loads the plastic dart gun. Alec complains that Jaye passed on all of her bad habits. Jaye offers a "whatever." Alec wishes he'd trained Binky himself. Binky aims the gun and fires: into Alec's eye. Thanks for the dart cam and the popping sound effect. They ruin what's a pretty funny reaction from Alec, all whimpering and hunching. Jaye looks amazed at Binky, who's holding the gun up like Dirty Harry. "This one works," she says. She smiles at Jaye, who smiles back.
"That's the most frightening thing I've ever heard," says the nameless friend to Jaye. Jaye laughs and says it was just a rubber dart. In his eye. They're in Jaye's trailer, and Jaye admits that Alec did suffer a detached retina, but whatever. Jaye can't stop laughing about Alec's permanent blindness as her friend thinks it's weird that some girl would be so violent on Jaye's behalf. Jaye says that Binky is a free agent and she's fine: "You should come out with us. I thought we could take her clubbing." Unnamed Friend: "Baby seals?" She then busts out the worst Hannibal Lecter ever. Seriously. "Can you hear the seals, Clarice? They're screaming!" She then does the fava beans inhale, and it's terrible. Jaye says that Binky is sweet and perfectly normal. As if Jaye would ever call anyone "sweet," and if she would ever call something "normal" without alluding to her own freaked-out life.
Jaye runs in to Wonderfalls, apologizing for being so late, but stops short when she sees that Binky has straightened her frizzy hair and is now a Jaye doppelganger. "Hey," says Binky. As Jaye takes this all in, we go to the Jaws camera effect where the background is crashing in on the main subject. Then it appears that the lights go out, and we can still see the shadow of Jaye before it all blacks out and goes to commercial.
Then the lights come back on and we see Binky asking Jaye what the big deal is. Jaye circles Binky and asks if that scorched smell is from Binky's ironing her hair. In her van? Jaye says that's her hair. "Whichever," says Binky. Jaye corrects her, and Binky freaks out a little, running to a notebook to correctly record "whatever" in it. Confusing: the folding prowess, the do-gooding turned to total apathy, any reason that she's emulating Jaye at this point. We already saw her taking photographs of Jaye, and we know she stole her wallet, so what was the point with the earlier incarnation? And does she really live in a van? That's the only place we've seen her. Are we supposed to be on her side? Is she supposed to be funny, awkward, stupid, brilliant, or desperate?
Jaye tells Binky that she knows imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but that she goes out of her way to cultivate a unique look and persona. I was going to argue that she's done absolutely nothing new, but for two days she's been wearing fake fur sleeves with her t-shirts, so I'm just going to shut up now. Alec walks past with his one good eye and says, "Morning, Tyler." Binky wishes him a good morning back. Jaye drops her mouth as Binky walks away: "You let him think you were me!" Binky says that Alec only has one good eye. "You want me to make him feel b-b-b-bad about it?" Okay, so she really does have a stutter? And becoming Jaye makes her overcome her stutter? Seriously, I'm asking now because with every scene they're not just changing the name we call her, they're changing her whole point of her being here. So I'm just trying to be clear, because later it gets even more confusing. "Get her words out," the chameleon says again. Jaye takes the stuffed animal and shoves it into her purse. Binky watches, like, "I'm fucked up, but this girl is wack."
Darrin enters the shop and says, "Morning, sweetheart." He kisses Binky on the cheek as she says, "Morning, Dad." So has Binky been by Jaye's house, that she'd know the sound of Jaye's family when they're behind her? Jaye looks horrified and stares at Binky, who then tells Darrin that he's not her dad. Darrin apologizes, and says he thought she was his daughter. He walks over to Jaye and kisses her on the cheek. Jaye tells Binky that now would be a good time to restock the motion lamps. "Whatever," Binky says as she walks away. Jaye puts her arm around Darrin and pushes him away from Binky. Darrin tells her that Sharon's book is going into a second printing: "It sold out on Amazon.com." Heh. Yeah. I've done that a couple of times. Unfortunately it's not as impressive as you might think. Amazon.com only has like, a couple hundred of any non-bestseller book on order at any time. Unless Sharon's book just has a really small printing, which, since it's a travel book, is probable. "Really? Good for Mom!" says Jaye, completely out of character. Darrin says it's also good for Jaye, because Sharon has to redo the dust jacket. Sharon and Aaron have agreed to give up five words each, leaving another ten for Jaye: "That's fifteen total." Jaye asks what it's going to say. "Whatever you want it to say," Darrin says. "You want me to write my own blurb?" Jaye asks, upset. Really, guys, I just...I just don't like her. She gets what she wants and then she's unhappy about it. Darrin tells Jaye that Sharon wrote her own blurb. Darrin tells her it'll be fun: "Let those fifteen words show what kind of a unique, one-of-a-kind daughter I have." A little redundant, but again, I can't believe how nice Jaye's family always is to her when she's so bitter and ungrateful. Jaye thinks about the one-of-a-kind part as she looks at Binky, who's staring at Jaye, who's looking at Binky. Scary music plays, for some reason.
The Barrel. Nameless Friend asks Jaye if she sic'ed Binky on her mother to get her more words. "No. In this instance I believe guilt was my friend. Actually more like my frienemy, because now I feel guilty over getting what I wanted." "Frienemy"? Who says that? Was that from Ally McBeal? Five years ago? (My bad. It was Sex and the City. Four years ago.) Also? Shut up, Jaye. Why would you feel guilty? You cried to everyone that you wanted more words. Gah. I say "Gah," to you, Ma'am! Nameless Friend offers a solution: "Then don't take the extra words." Jaye: "I don't feel that guilty." Nameless Friend sees Binky enter the bar, wearing Jaye's Wonderfalls vest. "Oh, look!" says Nameless Friend. "Huh-here cu-comes C-c-c-crazy. Hi, C-c-crazy!" Nameless Friend can't believe Binky now looks just like Jaye: "And you said she was normal." Jaye says to Binky, "Hi, you're wearing my vest? That's my name." Binky says she spilled coffee on her own. Jaye says that, regardless, Binky's now wearing a Wonderfalls vest in public. Binky takes off the vest and says she was in a hurry to leave, but if they wanted a funny line here, she could have deadpanned "I live in a van." Binky calls Alec "mouth-breather," and delivers a Jaye line or two before cuddling up to Eric and flirting with him for a beer. Nameless Friend calls Binky a Jaye Tyler cover band. Binky says she's sore, and that she's been sleeping in a van too long. She gets Eric to wrap his arms around her, lift her, and pop her back. Jaye -- who's never touched a boy -- looks outraged. She and Nameless Friend turn into the mouth-breathers as they watch Eric and Binky flirt. "I think you're the cover band," Nameless Friend says to Jaye. And yes, I know her name is Mahandra, but I shouldn't have to use the internet to find out what I'm watching. Jaye pouts that Binky didn't even have to giggle or toss her hair. Nameless Friend mentions that Binky sure isn't stuttering. "Yeah," Jaye says to the mounted bass. "I noticed." But she did in the last scene and... oh, forget it.
View-Master to the Wax Lion. Jaye pours tea in her trailer. She talks to her sister, Sharon, about Binky, saying that she thinks Binky needs her family, and that she's a runaway and her parents must be worried sick about her. Sharon digs for an olive out of a jar and asks Jaye what she wants her to do about it. Jaye says they need to find out her contact number so that she can call her parents and tell on her. Her name's Bianca Knowles. Not Beyoncé Knowles, y'all. This one's more buh-buh-buh-bootylicious. Sharon asks Jaye why she's doing this: "Is there a reward?" Jaye says she's trying to reunite a family, and that's reward enough. Sharon says that her parents could be carnies, and maybe, like Jaye, Binky doesn't enjoy her family's company. Jaye stammers that she likes her family's company, but prefers the time in short, controlled bursts. Jaye answers her phone. It's Nameless Friend, warning Jaye that Binky is now moving in on Eric, and that it's working fast: "She's sitting on your stool!" Jaye: "Oh, there are just so many things wrong with that sentence." Nameless Friend says that Binky is asking Eric for information about Jaye: "She's all up on his grill trying to suck out any details she can about you." Jaye and Nameless Friend are mortified. Jaye is confident that Eric won't fall for Binky's schtick. "Oh, he's going down," says Nameless Friend. "That girl is so his type. Jaye, she's you!" Jaye beams: "You think I'm his type?" Nameless Friend tells Jaye to get down to the bar, and hangs up. She turns around and finds herself face to face with a very grumpy Binky. Scary music plays.
Swipe to Jaye, who is collecting her coat, telling her sister that she's coming with her. "And try to look threatening!" Sharon has a piece of celery in her mouth. Jaye pulls her out by the arm.
The Barrel. Jaye watches Eric and Binky flirt over a pool table as Eric holds Binky close, teaching her how to hold a cue stick. Jaye brats right up, even though Nameless Friend tries to stop her. "What's he popping now?" Jaye asks. Binky says that Eric was telling her how much she liked billiards, and that she had never played before, so she had Eric teach her. Jaye says she's done playing: "Whatever your game is!" Sharon says that the girl looks familiar. "Because she's me!" Jaye shouts. Binky's stutter comes back as she apologizes, saying she was j-j-just trying to b-be Jaye's friend. Jaye bellows that there are laws against stalking, and that her successful lawyer sister will see to it that Binky's "pale imitation of [Jaye's] ass lands in jail." Binky can only get out a "Buh! Buh!" in extreme close-up before Jaye shouts, "Buh! Buh! Buh-BYE!" Why the scary music there, but then no music here when Binky runs away, crying? This show is awkward. It's all silent in this bar, this nightclub, so quiet we can hear Binky's footsteps as she runs out of the empty bar. Nameless Friend tells Jaye that she was mean. Sharon and Eric look on with variations on an arm-crossing theme. Nameless Friend says that Binky was asking questions because she wanted to help write the blurb for the book jacket. Jaye's not buying that, until Eric hands her the blurb Binky wrote down on a napkin. Why are you acting all weird, Eric? What's with the mugging face? Jaye reads. "Daughter Jaye, a philosopher, resides in Niagara Falls, where she inspires with effortless, undemanding style." Sharon, the only person I like on this show, snarks, "Aw. A runaway wrote that?" We close in on Jaye as she says, "It's poignant." Nameless Friend leaves to check on Binky.
But Jaye just decides to go home, I guess, complaining about Binky and her blurb to Sharon, wondering why someone would write a poignant blurb about someone she doesn't know. Sharon says that Jaye does inspire, because Sharon is now inspired to walk to her car and leave. She does. Jaye finds a van in the parking lot, the one with the "BINKY'S" license plate. Guess her New York plates give away the fact that she's not from Florida. Not that Jaye notices this. Jaye's too busy planning a break-in, which she immediately does.
Inside the van, Jaye finds not a living condition, but instead a collection of Jaye. There are photos on clothespins, t-shirts, a composition book filled with attempts at Jaye's signature, Jaye's Wonderfalls vest, pictures of family members, copies of her IDs, and candid shots of her. There's the sound of a heartbeat as Jaye looks over everything. Somehow Binky's van gets electricity, because Jaye opens Binky's iBook here to find that the desktop wallpaper is a picture of Jaye. I do appreciate that they left the laptop ajar so that we didn't have to watch her power it up, but couldn't it have been a screensaver? Also: what the hell is going on? This also makes no sense. Anyway, as Jaye looks through photographs of herself and the heartbeat sound continues, Binky appears from behind some kind of curtain in the largest van of all time. "You've ruined everything," says Binky. Jaye holds up a clothes hanger and threatens, "I know karate!" She then lunges at Binky, grabs her by the collar, and throws her to the bed. Officer, I do believe there's only one girl here committing a crime. Jaye and Binky fight. Jaye says, "You're like that girl in that movie who wanted to be that other girl so much that she'd kill for it!" Binky: "Grease?" Jaye: "Single White Female!" Never mind that the joke doesn't really work because it doesn't make sense, but Jaye's having to say Single White Female, totally kills any joke that was there by negating it. Binky tries to say what she's doing, but she st-st-st-stutters while Jaye shouts out guesses. "'Stalking me'? 'Stabbing me'? 'Stealing my organs after you stab me'? 'Stitching a skin suit out of my dead corpse after you stab me to steal my organs'?" Binky screams that she's studying Jaye. Jaye stops struggling and asks, "What?" Again the lights go all weird and the music crashes for no real reason and we go to commercial.
Post-commercial, Jaye asks, "You're an investigative journalist?" Binky stutters that she's writing a story about disaffected twentysomethings for Today's Am-America. ["Huh, I think I read that article. Eight thousand times. In 1992." -- Wing Chun] Binky wanted to get inside the mind of Jaye, so she thought she'd try to study her and become her so that she can write the article accurately. Jaye asks why the phony stutter: "Some might think it's offensive, and not just funny." Binky stutters that it's not phony. Then why did it go away when she was Jaye? Jaye says she's "not buying the whole Mrs. Doubtfire thing." Huh? Binky says she can prove it and hands Jaye a piece of paper...
...which teleports them to The Barrel, where Binky continues her sentence, about how this is the correspondence she's had with her editor at the magazine. Binky says that her editor wants her to send something, but that she can't seem to get started. Jaye reads the letter and stops when she sees that Binky is writing an article on "Gen-Y Losers." Binky says that Jaye's not really a loser: "It's really about w-w-winners who haven't w-won. Yet. Or ever." Jaye pouts. "I'm a non-winner." Binky: "Buh-buh-by choice." Binky says that Jaye represents a generation of young people who have been blessed with education and opportunity, who don't fall through the cracks but rather jump through. Jaye says she's not a crack-jumper. "HAAA-HAA!" Binky says. "The wuh-wuh-wuuuuuh-witty wordplay. The Ivy League irony." Binky appears to hate Jaye as much as I do. Jaye asks if Binky is also the girl who was stalking her at Brown, and stole her meal card. Binky says she was a freshman when Jaye was a senior. She found Jaye when she did a search of graduates who failed to make a contribution to society in any way. Binky says that's not a judgment: "You're a victim of the system." Does she like Jaye or hate her? This is so back and forth. She's still crazy, right? But Jaye doesn't mind, because she realizes that this is an article totally about her: "How many words?" Binky says, "Five thousand." Jaye: "Awesome." Binky says it would have been, but since the subject is now aware of her presence, the article is tainted. Jaye asks if that means she's not getting her five thousand words. Binky says there's not g-g-g-gonna be any wuh-wuh-wuh-wuh. The bass tries to tell Jaye to get her words out, but Jaye tells the bass she's way ahead of him. She tells Binky not to quit: "People need to know what it's like to be me. And that's gonna take words. Your words. About five thousand of them. You need to get them out, and I'm gonna help you do it." She offers Binky an all-access pass to the life of a prototypical Gen-Y'er: "Anything you want to know." "Full disclosure?" Binky asks. "I'll let you jump right into my cracks," Jaye says with such intensity that her cheeks shake. Binky pants.
Cut to happy music as Binky narrates what I guess is her article, as she watches Jaye work at Wonderfalls from nearby. Binky tells us that the Gen-Y person does everything she can to avoid interaction with society. Binky asks why Jaye would work a job in customer service if she wants to avoid people. Jaye explains that tourists, with their transient nature, aren't really people. Binky says that a place like this allows Jaye to remain inward and uninvolved. The Barrel bear from the end of the last episode gives Jaye a harrumph. "In theory," says Jaye. Yeah, that's all we've got, too. A theory. Who knows her relationship with that bear, and why they dropped the whole wishing-well thing after setting it up over and over again in the pilot. Do things really talk to Jaye? Is she a sociopath? Because I think she is. Binky tells us that the subject perpetually has a slump and a sneer.
Back at the bar, Jaye shoots pool and explains that the slump and sneer comprise a protective barrier, not unlike the Popemobile. Jaye says she surrounds herself with people who are just as unmotivated, but you have to be careful not to let them get too narcissistic: "Otherwise things start to be about something other than you."
Swipe to Jaye's trailer, where she's drinking as Binky continues to write in her notebook. Binky asks Jaye if all of her choices are specifically aimed at upsetting or disappointing her family. Jaye says that Binky wouldn't be the first to suggest that. She says she lives in the trailer because it's affordable and someone cleans out the refuse tank for free. Binky says it's so much more than that. Jaye says she already knows it looks like the inside of a Genie bottle. Binky says that Jaye's home is a trailer: "Don't you see the beautiful poetry in that? It's a thing that's been designed to go someplace, and yet the hitch isn't hooked up to anything. So it just sits here. Never living up to its potential but never in any danger of breaking down, either." Jaye says that Binky isn't having any trouble getting her words out tonight. Nor is she stuttering in the slightest. Her voice is also higher again. Binky is impressed that Jaye has created a stress-less, expectation-less zone for herself. Jaye: "Wow. I'm like a genius." She asks if they're almost done: "Because surprisingly I'm getting tired of talking about myself." Binky says she has everything she needs. The camera pulls away as we hear Jaye snoring in drunken slumber and the music stays all Lynch-y.
We see Jaye sleeping in her bed, fully clothed, and the sun rises and we hear birds and the clock ticking. Jaye wakes up and looks at the clock and says, "Aw, crap!"
Swoop to Wonderfalls. Jaye tries to slide her hand into Peggy's office, but her timecard is missing. She opens the door to find Alec sitting in the dark. "You're an hour late," he says. Jaye says that her alarm didn't go off. They use swooping sound effects for the timecard as Alec holds it out of Jaye's reach. Jaye sees that Alec is reading Binky's notes. Alec says he found them by the register this morning: "Imagine my shock when I found out the two of you weren't doing inventory yesterday." Jaye says she's still training Binky. "She already admitted everything," Alec says. Scary music plays as the camera frames the shot at an angle and Jaye starts to lie her way out of the situation. Then it gets confusing again, because Jaye tells Alec that all she knows is that Binky isn't an investigative reporter and that her article isn't tainted. Alec says he knows that Jaye had Binky follow her around writing down everything she said for a Wonderfalls document for future generations, and that she even believed Jaye when she said there was a time capsule underneath the Maid of the Mist. Jaye looks caught, but maybe that's supposed to be her realizing that Binky is covering for her, or maybe she did say it, I don't know. She says that some people will believe anything. Alec says that even if there was a time capsule, which he seriously doubts, the Wonderfalls document wouldn't be all about Jaye. That doesn't even make any sense. Alec points out the part in the notes that says Jaye called him a mouth-breather: "That's my favorite." Jaye says that was taken out of context. Alec tells Jaye that he has a deviated septum, and that he has to wait for his cartilage to stop growing before he can have the surgery. Alec says that Jaye has used Wonderfalls resources for personal use without permission, namely Binky. Jaye says she understands if he has to write her up. Alec says he got permission from Peggy to fire her. Alec tells Jaye to clean out her locker and turn in her vest: "I hope this doesn't affect our friendship." The camera's all angled and the room is dark and Jaye's wearing Muppet fur and she seems really upset which is strange since she hates the job and what the hell is this episode about? Did Binky get her fired? What the hell is going on?
Jaye tells her dad that she got fired. Darrin hugs her and apologizes. Jaye mopes that Sharon and Aaron can have their words back. Darrin says that Jaye will make good use of those words. He says this might be a good opportunity for her. Darrin says that "Dubya" failed the first time he ran for Congress, and now he's the President of the United States. Jaye says that Darrin doesn't seem surprised that she got fired. Creepy music and swoopy cam find Binky sitting on the couch talking to Karen. Jaye asks what Binky's doing there. Binky says it was her fault Jaye got fired, so she wanted to make sure Jaye's family knew that. Karen tells Jaye that Binky feels terrible for what happened, so Jaye should hear her out. Karen points out the way Binky is wearing her hair, and suggests that Jaye do the same with her own. Karen and Darrin leave. Binky apologizes to Jaye. She says she left the notes out. Jaye tells Binky to finish the article so that they can tell Alec everything and she can get her job back. Binky says that she can't do that. She can't write the article. Jaye says she has to get her words out. Binky says she c-can't. It's too much p-p-pressure. Jaye sits Binky down and tells her this is a huge opportunity for her and she can't just pass it up. What's with the weird music? Binky says she knows now that she can pass it up, and that she's going to. All her life she had this st-st-st-stutter because she can't get st-started on anything. And now she never has to. Jaye says she does. Binky says that Jaye showed her a new way. She can live in a pressure-less, expectation-free zone. "That's my zone!" Jaye shouts. "You're parked in my zone!" Binky weirdly says it's the only place she'll ever be able to breathe. Okay, so she's not a stalker, but she does want Jaye's life? And she is a journalist? But why the copying of identification cards? Jaye says that Binky didn't stutter at all earlier when she got Jaye to tell her everything: "You planned this! You suck!" Binky shouts back, "You suck!" They then shout "You suck!" at each other and then a couple of "Whatever"s at each other. They are interrupted by Aaron and Sharon, who are wearing the same clothes. What is with this show's random weirdnesses? And can someone turn off that weird music? Are we in a Pink Panther cartoon? Karen says it's pizza night, and she hopes Binky is staying. Jaye doesn't want her to, but she does. Zoom in on Jaye, who pouts until we View-Master out to commercial.
Pizza night. Binky thanks the Tylers for giving her a family supper at a kitchen table. Karen says they're normally in the dining room when they have guests. They're not really in the kitchen, but whatever. The family explains that they still have pizza every Tuesday night. Binky says it's "lovely" to see a family honoring tradition. She says she doesn't really have a family. Her parents both passed away when she was very young, and she was raised in foster homes. "No wonder you ran away," says Sharon. Huh? Binky says she tried to find solace in various religions, but that she's still seeking. Aaron says that kind of a journey is an ongoing one. Darrin explains that Aaron is working toward a doctorate degree in comparative religion. Binky is pleased to see there are two doctors in the house: "One to build the body, and one the spirit!" Sharon shouts, "I'm a lawyer!" Hee. Binky says this is the kind of family she dreams about having someday. Karen touches Darrin and says that all Binky needs to do is find the right partner. Jaye says that Bianca is a Single White Female. Aaron and Sharon stare at their sister. Binky giggles and fidgets as she confesses that there's a certain bartender she has her eye on. She gets up and leaves the table. Jaye follows, and grabs the other end of her plate, telling Binky she doesn't have to clear the table. Binky says she doesn't mind, and that she wants to. They fight over the plate, as Jaye says it's her job to clean the table on pizza night. Eventually, the plate hits the ground and shatters. Scary music. Weird angle. Jaye's family is shocked. Darrin immediately stands and says it's okay. He tells Jaye not to worry -- she lost her job today and that would make her upset and they all understand. Jaye doesn't deserve her awesome family. Binky says they all understand. Jaye screams that Binky isn't a part of the "we." She yells at her family that they don't understand. She points at Binky and takes a step back and screams, "She's an investigative journalist!" Everybody stares for a second. Then Karen says that's marvelous and asks Binky whom she writes for. Darrin asks what she's investigating. Jaye says that Binky's investigating Jaye. Sharon asks if it's a criminal investigation. Jaye says that Binky is writing an article about Jaye so that the whole world can see she's not a loser: "Five thousand words about me!" Binky looks at Jaye's family and laughs. "This is my fault," she says. "Jaye. I thought you knew I was kidding. She's upset because she only got five words in Karen's blurb. I told her I was going to get a job in a major magazine and get her five thousand." Now Jaye is mouth-breathing. And the weird music is back. And seriously, is Binky crazy, or is Jaye crazy, or what? Binky says she's just a retail clerk. "Like you...used to be." The camera goes in close to Jaye and once again we end a scene with Jaye looking around, mouth agape.
Barrel. Jaye takes another shot. She says she was an idiot: "I can't believe I let her get that close." Eric notes that Jaye doesn't usually do that, "let people get too close." Jaye says it depends on the person. She takes another shot: "I should have tossed her out on her bu-bu-butt." Eric asks if she would have been able to do that. Clearly. Jaye says she ironically saw a little of herself in Binky, before Binky actually became her. Eric says Binky's not Jaye. She's trying to be. "But can you really blame her?" Jaye says that they should diagnose Binky for wanting Jaye's crappy life and the job she hates. Eric looks bummed out as Jaye goes on about her life and her family, avoiding his role in it. Jaye asks who'd choose that or even want to read about it. Or watch a television show about it. "I would," says Eric. "And if there were pictures, I'd buy two copies." He smiles and leaves. The fish tells Jaye again to get her words out. Jaye suddenly hears chimes and music from American Beauty.
Cut to Jaye's trailer, where she opens a tangerine clamshell iBook and speaks to herself. "You wanna know about Gen Y? I'll tell you about Gen Y." Jaye then lifts her hands like Bela Legosi and sighs before literally attacking the keys and launching us into a montage that would make Carrie Bradshaw shriek in horror. She's nodding at herself, typing, mouthing words, typing, saving, printing, and mailing under Binky's name. She gives a satisfied smile. If you made the opposite of that montage, with growling and empty-calorie-filled snacks, and constant use of the "delete" key, and tears and throbbing veins followed by a clumsy email sent off and then a flailing of the body onto a couch or bed -- that's what recapping looks like.
Binky is at the Wonderfalls counter, head in hand. Jaye walks in to some kind of strutty music. Binky tells her that Alec said she has to call Security if Jaye walks in. Jaye tells Binky to call her agent first. Wait. Agent or editor? Huh? So confusing. Jaye hands Binky the magazine's acceptance letter: "They're printing your article." Ah, the cunning wiles of the slacker. Somehow this means Binky has to quit working at Wonderfalls and go be Jayson Blair somewhere. Jaye tells Binky that this life isn't Binky's, and that she doesn't belong there, but Jaye does. She tells Binky to get on with her life and let Jaye get hers back. Binky says she can't. Jaye says that if the trouble was that she didn't know how to get started, she doesn't have to worry about that anymore, because Jaye started for her. Binky stammers that she didn't earn this. Jaye says that makes Binky the real expert. She can go ahead and take credit for something she didn't do: "You don't get any more Gen Y than that." Really? I had no idea that was a description. I do believe all of Gen Y would beg to differ. Haven't we learned anything from the Britney versus Christina war? Binky takes off the vest, and Jaye calls her a slacker. Binky tells Alec that she's actually an investigative journalist who wrote a piece about Jaye. "I think that's fair," says Jaye. Binky quits and leaves. Jaye puts her vest back on. She helps a customer. Alec watches.
Zoom in on Jaye's vest. It says "Binky." But then the embroidery goes away and the words "Jen Why" replace it. Pull back to reveal the cover of Today's America Magazine, where a picture of pouting Binky wearing the vest asks, "Who is Jen Why? Slacker of Living Stress-Free? The Truth About Generation Y." Darrin reads from the article as we pull back to reveal a newsstand, and then push in to reveal Darrin reading the end of the piece in a restaurant. "Jen will continue to struggle, to thrash and fight." We're at a table where Jaye's family all has their own copies of the article, turned to the page. "Yet in her most personal, unguarded moments, she will speak of a calm pool." Jaye looks at her family. They must know that Binky didn't write this. Will they care? "A place where the waters become still and the chaos abates. A place where a father's wisdom...." Pan over to Karen. "A mother's compassion." Pan over to Aaron. "A brother's protection." Pan over to Sharon. "And a sister, thirty-five." Pan over to smug Jaye. "All combine to show Jen she is not alone." Karen says she's not alone. Sharon shouts that she's not thirty-five. "And you're not a lesbian either," Karen says, "but you can't expect her to get every detail exactly perfect." Sharon looks through the article to see if it says that. "Well, it was implied," says Karen. Sharon says that Binky has a lovely, crisp prose style: "What a talented girl." Darrin hopes they'll see her again. "I doubt it," says Jaye. Darrin was hoping Binky could come over for game night on Thursday. "Maybe Jaye will join us," says Sharon. Aaron says that Jaye should come, for once. Jaye says she's busy. She then says that the prose probably isn't as lovely or crisp, but that she did write her blurb for Karen's book jacket. "Daughter Jaye lives in Niagara Falls. Her blurb, and life, are a work in progress." The family laughs and we fade to black.
week Jaye tries to get a nun back into the habit.