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Getting everybody to the airport on time is kind of a nightmare. You got Silas having paternity-related freakouts and making out with Andy and refusing to go to Copenhagen, Shane acting sociopathic and abusing Lars, Schiff is still bonkers... Oh, and Nancy's in the trunk of Guillermo and Esteban's car.
Almost two-thirds of the episode takes place in the airport, as everybody tries to get where they're supposed to be. Ignorant of Nancy's fate, Andy does various feats to get Shane, the baby and himself -- along with Schiff -- through security. Meanwhile, Nancy manages to score a cell-phone off a cleaning lady thanks to her bloody nose ("Remember when you used to hit me and it was sexy?" she asks Esteban at one point) and tells Andy to go to Plan C.
Managing to slip the guys at the terminal, Nancy joins her family at the gate and then has a meltdown when she learns that Andy left Silas behind with Lars, because obviously he's not safe either. Of course Andy starts crying immediately when he figures out Nancy has no intention of getting on the plane. She stays, they leave, there's just unbelievably hairy tension as Shane acknowledges the fact, but before he can find a way off the plane and back to his mother the cops show up for Schiff. Who confirms he was fucking Nancy since she was fourteen -- "I loved her and then she outgrew me" -- so hopefully he is subsequently raped to death by dogs that are on fire.
By this point, Esteban and Guillermo have shown up with Silas in tow, so she gets to have another heartwrenching goodbye scene with him, because that's the moneymaker on this show every time. Silas boards the plane, and the three Botwin boys take off into the sky, France-bound and Iceland-passported, and they cry their little hearts out. Except for Shane, who mostly bulges in the eye area and fondles Schiff's giant airplane pillow full of secret cash.
Stevie strapped to her chest, flanked by Esteban and Guillermo, staring into the eyes of every single person that passes, Nancy walks the green mile all the way out to the front of the building, where... Plan C is fully in effect. FBI and cops have the place surrounded, including half the people that were walking behind them on the concourse, so she puts her hands up in the air and says, "I killed Pilar Zuazo, please arrest me." So they do.
Hmm. After the whole confessional with Klosterman the last couple weeks, this seemed like the smartest thing she, and the show, could do. I wonder what Plan B was, and I wonder what they can even really pin on her, considering she didn't actually kill Pilar and has set fire to everything else she's ever done bad. I don't think a season in prison would be all that interesting, no matter how many times per episode you cut to a storyline about Doug shoving things up his butt or whatever. And the boys are all in France or Iceland or Copenhagen now, and while in theory it could be them there and her here, in practice that wouldn't work, because without Nancy-and-Andy there wouldn't be a show, and without her kids she's not a mom. Poor Esteban and poor Guillermo are probably already in a database, so hopefully she took them down too. For a woman who lives off the blood of men, she sure did just save everybody on the entire show. I hope her usual thing kicks in and she somehow gets out of it all scot-free, but I'm starting to wonder. Either way, best season in a long time.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Previously Nancy tried to get Guillermo to kill Pilar -- that didn't work out so well -- and then she got money for everybody from the reporter but he died, and then Schiff robbed the post office once again, and then she got caught in the reporter's motel room with poor Esteban and sad-face Guillermo about to kill her.
But what's interesting is how the fix is always the big problem. Not just immediately but spread out over the whole season. Like, Stevie was the miracle fix two years ago and he was the big problem last year -- getting him born, staying alive and with him, keeping her other kids safe -- and a major one this year. And killing Pilar was the fix last year but that's been half the problem this year. A month in Seattle, a month on the road, a month in Dearborn: Pilar, then Stevie making sure they couldn't stay on the road forever, and then both at once combining into a major incrimination for Nancy's like entire life.
Which I like, because anything that is the fix stops being the fix the second it becomes the fix. Your brain wasn't designed to find one answer and stick with it, it was designed to find one answer and then find the answer. So this episode is great, and very tense and very unlike everything last sad week, and it leads to a fix that clearly is going to be a big problem, but is also maybe the most exciting finale in a while.
She was a dancer, it's all she's ever doing. Even when she looks like she's falling, even when she's jumping, it's just another dance move. That was the first fix and that was the first problem. She dances herself into cages and then back out of them again.
So Esteban's playing that recording over and over: "Every time, I'm walking down that tunnel. Every time. And once I find out what's at the end, I'll figure it out then. But at least I'll know. I'll know. Why would you not want to know?"
She tells them both hola and congratulates them on getting back together. "Guess it's only fitting that, uh, since... Since I broke you up..." She doesn't really finish that thought because Guillermo chloroforms her at that point, with slidy-aroundy camera and slidy-aroundy music sliding all around.
Andy heads over to Lars Guinard's house with Silas's ticket and passport, even though he knows it is a fool's errand, and Silas is doing all this car-related busywork like a witness on Law & Order getting interviewed about a crime, and Andy incorrectly thinks Silas refusing to go with them is about being pissed about Nancy, so he gives a great speech with his eyes bugging out:
"Nancy, your mother -- who not only gave unto you her egg, but raised you and fed you and loved you and wiped your ass and provided a pretty great father for you, despite his early exit -- your mother wants us all together."
Silas is not interested in Nancy's wishes, he's interested in learning about his "spermdaddy," which is super weird and not to mention the fact that he has already learned all there is to know about simple, sweet, old-ass Lars Guinard, and then Shane comes in with a bit of speech of his own: "Hey faux uncle and half brother, we gotta go. Schiff's freaking out every time he sees the meter go up fifty cents."
I like how Schiff is the new Doug or Celia and just knowing he's alive makes watching this show feels so stressful and harrying, like, pretty soon he's going to be onscreen and I don't know if I can fucking take it, and that's exactly how they all feel too. I like that Shane never bonded with him, you know? Just made fun of him for being old and stupid. I like it when we're mean to child molesters.
Shane's like, "Fine, later" but Silas shoves him down and tells him to cut it out with the jaded "I'm dead inside" routine, because he's going to miss his brother hugely.
"I'm going to Europe. You're sitting here in Deershit, Michigan, in a garage."
The brotherly advice that Silas provides -- grabbing Shane by the hair and getting very serious -- is something we could all think about from time to time: "Please, please: Choose to not be a dick." Simple, beautiful, and most of all something we -- Nancy especially -- are not quite prepared yet to hear.
Everybody says larsguinard as many times as possible in the goodbye conversation, which starts when Larsguinard shows up confused by why his old math teacher is at the door, and Andy remembers the time Alanis Morissette gave him an F, and Silas calls attention to the differences between himself and Alanis Morissette -- which are admittedly legion -- like for example he and Andy, who are not actually blood related, never even got to first base.
So then they do.
Which is confusing for Larsguinard in many ways, because what if your suddenly child was gay for uncles, and Shane kind of fucks with him about it -- while Silas somehow actually gets sadder at this moment, the moment of the actual kiss, like it's real suddenly -- but then Andy pulls a Virgo and he's all, "I'm saying goodbye to my nephew, who I love, who I'm gonna miss, and who I might never see again." Larsguinard corrects him on the "nephew" thing and everybody in the world shouts "Shut up, Larsguinard," and faux uncle and half-brother bounce with Old Molesty.
Well, Nancy's tied up in the back of a car with zipties and a reporter corpse on top of her, so she's screamin' a little bit. There's composure and then there's corpse adjacency. Guillermo shushes her but she doesn't shush and she squeamishly begs to ride up front with the non-dead people, but of course Guillermo loves this too much to get her out of the trunk. However, Nancy also has that ability to be super annoying and never give up, so eventually they let her up into the backseat. Guillermo has the distinct look of one who feels he has failed.
Nancy swears that Stevie's not at the airport, acts offended that they don't believe her, and then changes the subject with a whisper to how many people have seen the tape of Shane bopping Pilar. Esteban assures her that he has control of the DVD and that if she doesn't produce his heir for him at the airport, he'll have Shane arrested for murder. Nancy goes into total Momma Lion mode and starts talking some real stupid mess about how she knows all this shit, saw all this shit -- bribery extortion blackmail bank accounts missing DEA agents dead journalists in the trunks of sedans -- and Guillermo's like, "Um, we are going to kill you. Unless the FBI's into the dark arts of Ouija or Patricia Arquette is real, I think it'll be okay."
Which, I don't know anything about this stuff. If they showed that video I would just point to Pilar's mouth and say, "This is the part where the corrupt millionairess -- See her? With her hands on both the government and the drug trade there? -- that's where she said she was going to have my family murdered. I don't know if you guys in law enforcement are familiar with gangster things, but I kinda think she could've pulled it off." And they would say "We're putting Shane in jail" and I would say, "Good! Do they have the talking cure in jail? Because between you and me this kid is bananas."
Anyway, Nancy tells Guillermo to shut up in a hilariously bratty way, and then makes the mistake of kitten-talking to Esteban and twice calling him her "husband," so then her husband hauls off and smacks her across the face. Hard, like Phil Stuckey hard. Because how mean to even call him that! I've always liked Esteban and Guillermo, both, so it's kind of nice to see them being so creepy and still so hurt. Like a bug going, "I can't believe I let you put your wasp eggs in my brain!"
Nancy, whose nose is once again bleeding, jokes around about how Esteban spanked her in the limo that one time, and how there are differences between getting punched v. getting slapped around, and he's like, "You kidnapped my son, you kidnapped my son" blah blah, and she calms down for a second before asking if there's even really a reason he's keeping her alive, like, maybe there's a point to be made there. But he just says the point is that she still has Stevie and they are going to find Stevie. Watching them do this, with her handcuffed and him being a stone killer with a lady problem, at all, is somehow still exactly like watching a formerly fantastic couple going through ugly mediation.
Meanwhile at the airport, they're all trying to figure out how to talk like Iceland people. Andy tells Shane to talk like Björk, Schiff asks who that is, Shane tells him he was a Supreme Court nominee from the Reagan administration, Andy picks out a dark-skinned man with facial hair from the line, from among the slurping fat Americans, and lets everybody go by until he's in line behind him, so the guys will be distracted by the automatic profiling and irritated by their Icelandic activities, because racism isn't racist if you're making a statement about racism, not that this show ever makes it all the way back around no matter how hard or constantly they try, and anyhow it's all quite droll.
Shane and Andy do weird accents -- Schiff's using his real passport, which will matter later -- and Andy foreshadows Plan C by producing a note from Stevie's Icelandic mother giving them permission to get through security and meet at the gate. Short bitching session about the TSA, and then Jenji Kohan on her way to somewhere else walks in front of Guillermo, who is wearing those freaky-outy barefoot shoes with the toes that smell like a burning wetsuit, because he's training for a half-marathon, and Nancy's just pulling mean statements out of her ass.
Mostly from boredom, I think, but also because Guillermo is the only boy she didn't ever actually eat and he keeps fooling her into thinking she did and then boom, j/k, and that's gotta rankle. If he didn't always always have to play gay characters due to being the only out actor in the entire universe, I would be okay with making Guillermo gay, but god knows where they'd go from there anyway, on this show.
"You don't look very fit," she says, and later, "You look gay holding my purse," and finally this lady is like, "Nice nosebleed, pretty white lady with the two sketchy Mexicans. Blink once for help and twice for I am on meth regardless of how pretty I am, go back to ignoring me, your good deed for the week has been accomplished."
Nancy doesn't blink, but Esteban does: He sends Guillermo with her to the bathroom. Which is where she will actually get a leg to stand on, due to her lady power being in ebb right now, so she has to go to the only place where lady power is free, and Guillermo... Whatever, I just want him to do a dirty dance. I don't care where it is. Andy calls Nancy for the billionth time, trying to find out which Plan and where she is, but Guillermo is impolite about letting her take calls.
Which: Do they think she has Stevie in a locker at this airport? In Detroit's Terminal Internacional? Why won't they let her talk to her accomplices? Why can't Guillermo be like, "Hey, Blue Eyes, I have your sister-in-law. Meet us in the ladies'."
Nathalie being unavailable still, Andy's forced to wait. Schiff puts on a fishing hat that says JESUS! and tells them that he plans to scare off any strangers on this full flight by saying, "Hello, friend!" And in the instance that the person actually is a Jesus Freak, he will just put some porn on his laptop. Probably kiddie porn.
And in the instance that the person is both a Jesus Freak and a kiddie porn enthusiast, hopefully they will enter into one of those traditional German agreements where somebody cooks up Schiff's sad old-man penis with some garlic, for dinner, and they have it with a nice Eiswine while listening to Rammstein and engaging in a little friendly sodomy. Mr. Holland's Last Opus, as it were. And still this show would be like, "But is it dark enough."
In the WC Guillermo and Nancy argue about bloody nose care until the cleaning lady comes in and yells at him to get the fuck out of there -- which think about that little journey, how Nancy started out having a maid and then being a maid (but secretly better than other maids in her own head) and then she and the maid beat the fuck out of each other and now a maid is saving her -- and Nancy's like, "It's okay, honey. You can step out." Cleaning Lady is like, "Get out of here before you freak people out. Go on!" Nancy "jokes" that the lady might call security if he doesn't leave, and he does that bruised-eyes angry face he does, and Nancy immediately dances over to ask her for her cell phone.
"Did Mr. Freaky Shoes do that to you?" she asks, and Nancy's like, "Kinda, yeah." She calls Andy and all she'll say is, "It's Pl
an C. Plan... No, seriously. It's C." Which we won't know until the very last part what that means, but I don't want to recap it twice so we'll pretend you already know what Plan C is, and if you don't go watch the show, it's great.
"We're at the airport. So is Esteban. Yeah, bye." Andy's shoulders dip under whatever the weight of Plan C is, and his face goes all manlike and he fake smiles and says, "I'm sure she'll be here soon." Schiff and Shane are less convinced, but C isn't about impressing them with her punctuality, it's about getting Shane out of the country. Andy sighs, full of the empty place for facts and details he doesn't know for sure yet, and drags Shane and Schiff to the gate so he can do his part of the Plan.
Esteban tries to get two tickets for the flight, but it's all sold out, so he asks for any flight, which raises some eyebrows, and he's not checking baggage, and all of a sudden he turns from a hottie to a terrorist, so the guy fumbles and says his computer froze, and Esteban's used to being treated like a rich man, so he doesn't even see what is plain to see about this situation. But, never having been a man, Nancy completely does.
"You're a foreign national? Buying last-minute tickets to Europe? Money is no object? If you'd ordered the halal meal, you might have hit the trifecta..."
Shit gets real tense for the boys, and the other ticket people and other white people stare and stare, and Nancy finally takes a giant step back, like in Mother May I, and asks Guillermo if maybe he picked up her ticket and passport by mistake, "sir," and totally plays the pretty white lady card, and Guillermo has to not only hand over the stuff but also feel horrible about the way this is playing out. Even though actually he is exactly what they think he is, it's still really insulting I'd imagine, because Guillermo is also much more than what they think he is.
Which... I mean, I've always said this show is about the economy of men and how, if you are somehow marginal to that conversation -- black, female, gay, Latino -- then you have a duty to yourself to step outside the bonds of that conversation. All drug legislation is about keeping poor people poor, because what do the white men care if you create a black market, as long as the white market stays clean.
And for Nancy, that has meant a lot of things, leveraging herself in all kinds of ways (demeaning herself not very often at all, if you think about it this way) in order to get there. So playing the White Lady Card now that she's stuck in the Esteban/Guillermo dynamic, to open her cage up to the greater White People of Iceland dynamic, it's cynical but to me it's just crossing the same kind of line, in the only circumstance maybe ever where it's appropriate to do so:
"White privilege is, after all, a privilege!"
So they're kind of angry, I think, to be reminded that this is the world that we live in -- like, Andy's vic was probably a lot more resigned -- because it's not actually the world they live in, very much of the time. Which, that's a lot to play because the scene could also be read as, "The villains are thwarted by the wily heroine." Which, they're not villains and she's sure as fuck not a heroine, but this show gets things like this really weird a lot of the time, so I wanted to clap for that little moment because the actors are really selling it all.
Guillermo pretends it was just an accident and she does Nice White Lady that -- with every step back -- gets more and more awesomely harsh: "No, no, it's my fault. I'm so sorry, it was my fault, I set it down on the counter. It could have happened to anybody. Who's also from Iceland!"
Nancy bounces and they get taken in immediately, and it's a sad commentary on our sad times that actually works. Andy's on the phone with Plan C, and Schiff's bitching about how Nancy was always late -- for class, for dinner -- and how he used to buy her Lean Cuisines because at his house there was no cooking (too crazy, too pervy) and at hers there was no cooking either (too sad, too drunk). Shane finally asks the question nobody fucking wanted the answer to.
A: Fourteen.
Proudly: "Let's just say that I was old enough to know better, and young enough not to care. I loved her. And then she outgrew me... And then she left. But she came back."
The thing about Lolita that I've always loved the best is that it's really the story of two people who got what they wanted, and it killed them. I'm sure if you've never read the book -- you think it's about predators and prey and whatever -- Jezebel probably says it's racist towards fat people or whatever's outraging us this week, but no: Just a girl who got what she wanted, and didn't want it anymore, and she didn't really know what she was asking for when she asked for it. And it's about a guy for whom the same exact things were true.
But since that book is literary and this show is usually, decidedly not -- fillips, those blue butterflies always showing up when we need them, the Bear, the tunnel -- it's okay to look at Humbert and Dolores as barely-real intellectual creations because that's what they are, and still hate Schiff. When you use the quadratic equation you don't worry about the effect of the patriarchy on the sexual self-image of the variable b; when it's Nancy you better keep your fucking hands off her.
Anyway, Andy's finishing up Plan C when Nancy finally appears, overjoyed to see her, and sadly admits Silas isn't there. Her heart breaks and she shouts at Andy for letting him go off on his own, because: He is not safe. Plan C doesn't account for Silas staying in the country because Plan C doesn't involve doing anything particularly awful to Esteban or the Esteban machine, because Plan C can't invite countermeasures against Shane, so Silas has to go to Iceland or else he'll be in even more danger than he is right now.
"He's with Lars. Lars has very white teeth."
Nancy explains that Lars played hockey and his white teeth are fake, and grabs a phone to call Silas and see what she can do about him. Two very lovely exchanges here, the first as Schiff asks what's up with Andy and Nancy and Shane goes, "Who knows? Always drama," then assures Schiff that they'd never hook up.
The world would end, and they both know it. The second is between them, when she complains that he let Silas stay, and he turns that grownup gaze on her: "I can't believe you can't understand why." And she can, and she does, and she's scared. When they call for passengers, Nancy and Stevie now being in the same place at the gate, Andy nearly jumps into the air with excitement, because they could go back to Plan A. And maybe if Silas were there, she could, but now it's got to be Plan C. Which means they are suddenly saying goodbye.
Andy's face nearly breaks and she stares at him, worried; he nods and points out that she's ruined his life. Which she's fine with, but not the way he almost bursts into tears: That makes her slap him, to make it stop. He does, jumping into manic jokey-smurf: "Not to mention you lied to my brother and made him raise another man's baby! When are we gonna deal with that?" I wouldn't say he's delighted, because it's kind of intense, but there's a sort of oooh girl drama face that comes over him that's pretty great. Like, not "deal" necessarily but maybe kinda "dish." You know?
"I know. I'm the downfall of all Botwin men." "And Guinard, and Reyes," Andy points out, and Schiff and Shane show up. Andy's got to hide his face when she mumbles about changing the baby so they can go ahead, but you can tell Shane's already halfway there. She ushers them away, but she can't help giving him a little encouragement, instead of goodbye. Her voice breaks when she asks him for a pillow and blanket, and he nods. "Go fast, okay?"
The last person she sees is Andy, and it nearly kills her. Once they're on the plane Shane's like, "I gotta get something, hold on." Andy refuses to look him in the eye as they quibble over gum and who gets the aisle seat, but eventually Andy gives in and he heads for the front of the plane. The look in Shane's eye is something we've only seen a few times: Whenever Nancy gets caged up. It's heartbreaking. But he gets a little stronger, they both do, when Andy admits she's not coming.
Esteban and Guillermo show up with Silas, and the camera does that Hitchcock thing where she stays put and the world peels away, and Silas apologizes for showing up at just the wrong time: Guillermo and Esteban ran into him just after proving themselves to security: "It was like fate," Guillermo grins.
The thing that makes you awesome is the thing that makes you suck. 100% of the time. But we hardly ever get to talk about the opposite thing, which is also true: The very worst thing about Nancy Botwin is the very best thing about Nancy Botwin.
Nancy gives Esteban the baby and tells Silas to get on the plane a couple of times. His refusal is all about her safety, not Larsguinard or anybody else, and there's a complicated negotiation between them that breaks when she walks him to the gate. Silas's point is that she's about to be murdered, or run with Esteban, and neither of them are okay; he doesn't know about Plan C. Stevie's crying, in Esteban's eyes.
Silas wishes her luck -- with her "new, old, fucked-up life" -- and the assumed nastiness with which she assures him that she's choosing Stevie over him -- "He's fresh, you're cooked" -- is so unconvincing she can barely stand up when she walks away. And that's how he knows she's not choosing Stevie at all.
"When you kill her, let us know, okay? Just for closure."
She wants to turn around so, so bad, but she doesn't want that to be the last thing he sees. When he finally gets to the door and ready to leave, she can't take it and runs to him. "Lars was teaching me how to change spark plugs," he says, throwing his arms wide, and she gives him one last hug goodbye.
Silas joins the boys and Shane, already a basketcase, nearly smiles at him. He doesn't want to ask but he wants to make sure that Silas saw her, before they left. The three Botwin men share a very awful, very silent moment, that Schiff doesn't even register. He just calls Silas "Midas," again. Every time he says that it gets sadder, because that's what Silas could have been. The opposite of his mother.
Nancy assures Esteban she's not going anywhere -- and that, any time she's said that before it wasn't that she lied -- and he finally gives the baby back to her. She's embarrassed and scared, because Plan C is still not for sure, and she holds her baby like a lifeline.
The cops arrive, heading toward the plane, and for a second she allows herself to hope. But they just keep walking, all the way to the gate and through it, and right to the boys. Shane stares, Andy's scared, it takes them forever and ever to get down the aisle. And that's when they arrest Warren for the robbery.
He gives Shane his giant plane pillow -- which is clearly stuffed with cash -- and they take him away. Outside, talking louder and louder, eventually shouting, he tries to explain to Nancy (I suppose, wondering why she's not yet on the plane) the following:
"If this was a confession -- which it isn't, because I'm innocent, but theoretically speaking -- if I were to do something like rob a post office, it would be because I loved someone very, very much, and I always will."
It actually hurts her, what he's saying, because it's all falling apart; she's the opposite of Midas. "Theoretical love is not dead," the cop snorts. "Hooray for us all."
Esteban won't let her watch the plane take off, so they head back out of the airport. She makes small talk -- Cesar's retired, retired-retired, not dead; buying a boat -- and lets it die. Surprisingly, especially for Guillermo, Esteban finally speaks up. She's spent all season trying to get him to talk to her, and now that he's won, he can.
"You could have come to me. We would have worked it out."
Which is true, in its way. She admits she panicked, because she's not really into explaining her whole entire deal about how that would never, ever happen, and he almost laughs. "A thousand chances you had, and you took my child away."
As though it's a debate, as though there's a winner here, she pulls a "you kidnapped Shane" in recompense, and Esteban points out that she forced that too. Besides, he's a killer. She returns the serve -- Isn't this exactly like divorce mediation? All the meaningless points getting scored that change nothing -- and says Esteban's a killer, and Guillermo's a killer too. Except, of course, for when he's supposed to be.
"Fucker! Dealbreaker fucker," she grits at him, with even a little wall-eyed can you believe this guy glance at Esteban. And when Guillermo explains he hates her ass, she laughs at him. "You love me, you sociopathic piece of shit." He promises to kill her, gangland style, ugly, and she goes back to making fun of his shoes.
"My shoes are awesome," he sighs, and she turns back to Esteban, begging him to let Shane go in peace one last time. He laughs at her for being such a devoted mother, and she reminds him of just what that means, and how they're connected: "You'll say nice things about me to Stevie?" Plan C's already gathering, all around them, and the boys don't even notice.
It's not that the personal is political: That's a Baby Boomer lie that tells us we're so special the world won't keep turning unless we keep our own importance in our mind's eye at all times. And by turns the political is revealed as personal: Single choices, aggregating. But when you're left out of the conversation, when you're pushed into shadow economies, the personal is staunchly not political because you have no voice in the body politic, which is why her crimes were never crimes: When you're pushed out of the conversation, the personal is all you have left.
Esteban says that Stevie's mother loved him so much she was willing to sacrifice everything, even her life, for him. Which is true, in a way. But not a way he can see yet. She finally stops, in the corridor, near the door, so that anybody who might be standing behind them -- all the faces, all so concerned with getting where they're going -- can see her face, and offers him a farewell fuck. Just long enough, just random enough, that he'll get it moving again, toward the door: "That's crass. And it won't save you."
And when she asks what will save her, and he says nothing, she already knows what will: She can see the sunlight on the windshields of the cars lined up outside the concourse doors, the glints of their guns, the earpieces in the men that are surrounding them: Plan C.
Surrounded on all sides, with Esteban to her right and Guillermo to her left and the baby on her chest, surrounded by the ocean of everything she's ever been terrified by and all the things she's ever run from, she nearly smiles. The FBI screams at them to put their hands up, and she steps, just lightly, carrying the full weight of her on her toes, one last time, to the front of the crowd:
"I killed Pilar Zuazo. Please arrest me."
And then, just a little quieter: "Please."
The lights come up, suddenly, on a bright-blown certainty: The thing that makes you suck is the thing that makes you awesome. She's always known it, she's always assumed it, and it's what makes Daredevil Girl such an impossible, such a necessary girl. She's not falling, she's dancing. Watch her dance.
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