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Is it over? Is it over? Oh please let it be over! I'm speaking not of Stefan and Elena's love story, although I am grateful for a break from that. No, I mean Elena's incessant moping. You know me -- I've been a staunch Elena defender for the past three seasons, but being beat about the head with excessive exposition regarding her all-encompassing compassion has left me short on patience and empathy. Let's hope "We All Go A Little Mad Sometimes" is the coda to her dirge.
It seems that killing a hunter comes with side effects -- specifically hallucinations meant to convince the killer to kill herself. Hallucination-Connor gets right to work on Elena, who freaks out, screams to Jeremy for help and then stabs little brother right in the neck -- because she thinks he's Connor. I still don't like that the ring protects from even mundane murders when committed by a supernatural entity, but I do like McQueen so I'm trying not to dwell. Because she's still ticked at Stefan for lying to her, Elena calls Damon for help, who in turn immediately calls Stefan anyhow. Being around Stefan only makes Elena feel worse so he leaves and meets Klaus outside Gilbert Gables. Klaus explains what's going on with Elena. Since she killed a hunter, she is cursed.
When Klaus kidnaps Elena to keep her safe, the Fellowship of the Falls works to free her. And free her they do, but they also let her escape their own protective custody. Elena's hallucinations feature not only Katherine, but also Mama Miranda Gilbert. It's at Wickery Bridge that Hallucination-Mom convinces Elena to throw her daylight ring in the drink and just wait for the sun to rise.
To break the curse, a new hunter has to be activated. And what do you know -- Jeremy just got his own mostly invisible hunter's mark! All he has to do is kill a vampire and Elena's imaginary torment will come to an end. Jeremy suggests Damon as his first kill, which I cheer for despite myself. (I mean, what would I do without our Evil Pixie Monster?) But in the end, the Fellowship settles on Chris -- the hybrid Tyler and Hayley are working with to break his sire bond.
Damon finds Elena at Wickery Bridge. When she's not actively hallucinating, he tries to get through to her. It takes Chris's death (back at Lockwood Mansion) to truly free her mind, but by then the sun is coming up. When Elena's skin starts to sizzle, Damon grabs her and pulls her over the rail and into the river.
Chris's death leaves Caroline and Tyler's relationship on the rocks. Care Bear helped the Fellowship save their friend, Elena. In doing so though, she not only sacrificed Tyler's friend and pack-mate, but also agreed to a date with Klaus as a point of negotiation. I'll spend more time on that in the recap, but right now I've got bigger fish to fry, because Elena finally admits she wants Damon.
When Elena wakes in her own bed, Damon is there. He informs her that he found her daywalker ring, which explains why she's not a big pile of ash. Since that's news to Elena, it leaves me wondering how he got her home without her remembering -- not to mention burning up. Occam's Razor would suggest that he found the ring while they were underwater and then got her home, but if so, why doesn't she remember? And even if he didn't, why doesn't she remember? Is it just me or has common sense been sacrificed on the altar of intimate bedroom conversation?
Whatever... when Elena's feelings for the Evil Pixie Monster become evident -- not that they haven't been obvious forever -- instead of taking advantage, Damon takes the high road. I know! He proceeds to tell her the truth: Stefan has been in collusion with Klaus only in order to find a cure for Elena's vampirism.
Elena and Stefan have a heart to heart on the porch. While he appreciates that she waited out his Ripper phase, he just can't deal with the fact that her vampirism has magnified her attraction to his brother. Unwitting attraction is worse than ripping people apart, putting them back together and throwing cell phones out speeding car windows, right? In this universe, yes… yes it is.
In all seriousness, while I've been waiting and hoping for the day when Elena would admit her feelings for Damon, her breakup with Stefan plucks at my heart strings. I can't watch their sad scene without hoping that these two crazy kids will work things out. I am not a love triangle hater. I hate badly done triangles. This one works for me best at times like these -- when I feel invested in all three characters and all of their relationships with one another.
While I'm disappointed that Katherine was only a hallucination, I'm hopeful that the events of "We All Go A Little Mad Sometimes," get Elena over the hump of her unyielding compassion. I don't want her to lose touch with her humanity. I don't want her to turn into an unrepentant monster. I do want her to be something other than a sad sack. Maybe Damon can help her after all. (Fun Fact: Every time I proof this recaplet, I see Maybe Damon as Matt Damon and wonder what the heck he's doing in this show.)
My own hallucinations aside, since Damon wasn't all too pleased with vampirism at the beginning of his unlife and seems to have been a sad sack for 60 years (or however long it was until he met Sage), perhaps he can help Elena lighten up a little. In other news, I'm still waiting for some sibling time between Jeremy and Elena. In the wake of Elena's transition, there is a vein of emotion there just screaming to be mined. Now that Jeremy has become his own sister's natural enemy, I hope it is not glossed over in service of more plot-driven tension. This series soars when the stories are character driven.
I'll be back with the whole story, which includes some tidbits about Professor Atticus (!) Shane and his plans, in the full recap. In the meantime, please grade the episode at the top of the page and then come on over to the forum, where we're breaking up with Stefan on the front porch.
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Want more? The full recap starts right below!So. I was really pleased with and proud of myself after I wrote that recaplet (see above link). Instead of blowing my wad, I discussed the episode without writing myself into a corner. I left plenty of unsaid things just ripe for full recap picking. I was sitting pretty, so I rested on my laurels. I enjoyed my weekend with my family. I even did some housekeeping. I forgot about Thanksgiving. I forgot about both Thanksgiving and my daughter's birthday. NOTE TO DAUGHTER: I didn't forget that you have a birthday, nor did I forget when it was. When I say 'forgot' what I mean is that I let it sneak up on me. Also, it seems you've forgotten you're grounded from the internet right now, but I remember that, so stop reading this. Anyhow, now I'm scrambling to make deadline, while my mind is more on pie. I really know how to entice you all to read more, right? Shhh. Remember back when this was a weecapped show, but I gave you a full recap, week after week? Think on these things, and forgive me, Readers, for I have sinned. I promise to try to bring in the fun. You ready? Okay!
Previously, on The Vampire Diaries, there was a montage. Supernatural creatures have been around for centuries. Elena is one. She needs blood. If she kills someone, she'll crumble. Connor wants to kill all the beasties. Stefan wants to tap into Connor for a vampirism cure. Elena kills Connor. Sadness ensues.
Currently, on The Vampire Diaries. Lying in bed, Elena pants. She tosses. She turns. She is restless. She retreats to the kitchen, where she nukes a cup of tea, or maybe an ill-advised mug of bagged blood. SHE HAS TO DRINK FRESH FROM THE VEIN, DARN IT. It's when she hears the voices that she knows she's crazy. I know you know what I mean. Connor is there, or his ghost, or an illusion, or such. His neck is still bleeding from Elena's bite mark. Elena tries to write him off. She calls for the Germ, and is so insistent that Connor is a ghost that I want her to say, "She thrusts her fists against the posts and still insists she sees the ghosts," but she doesn't, because we're not dealing with a giant spider who doubles as a clown, here. Even though he's a ghost or a hallucination, Connor grabs our girl. I don't like it when ghosts (or hallucinations) can do physical stuff, and neither does Elena. She pushes him off and grabs a knife, which she promptly inserts into his neck, except all of a sudden, it's not Connor with the knife in his neck. It's Jeremy. Title Card.
Cut to morning. Jeremy is lying dead(ish) on the Gilbert Gables' couch. Elena is hyperventilating her story to Damon, who points out that Germ is wearing his psycho killer protect-o ring. He also suggests she call Stefan. No. Not a living soul can figure out why she didn't feed the Germ her healing vampire blood before he passed, but there you go. I mean, I know there's the risk that he could die with vamp blood in his system and become a vampire, but by relying on the ring, there's a risk that Jeremy could go the way of fugue-state psycho killer Alaric, which is no better, and actually a darned sight worse.
Elena reminds Damon about all Stefan's lying and the possibility that he compelled Jeremy. Damon: "In all fairness, I think you killing [Jeremy] trumps that." Everyone's a critic. When Stefan enters, Damon is sheepish. "P.S. I called Stefan." Did you laugh? I so laughed. Elena doesn't want to talk. She excuses herself to shower and "clean all the blood" off her hands, in case we didn't realize SHE'S A VAMPIRE.
As soon as Elena leaves, Jeremy gasps his way back to life. When he asks what happened, Damon can't be arsed to explain. "Buy the e-book." Stefan goes upstairs and finds Elena in her room. He knows she's pissed at him, but he wants to help. When Elena doesn't want his help, Stefan is all: oh, but you want Damon's. Darn tooting. That boy is fine. Okay, both boys are fine. I'm Bi-Salvatore. But don't you think it's Damon's turn? Whatever. This isn't going well. Elena knows Stefan is in cahoots with Klaus. She has her own brother's blood on her hands. She's not in the mood to let himself talk his way out of "this."
Lockwood Mansion. Tyler wakes and comes downstairs to find Hayley and Chris (Ser'Darius Blain), who stayed up all night, paying their respects to Dean (Blake Hood) -- the hybrid who took a nail bomb and weird weapon to the chest, just last week. It's then that Hayley gets frisky. After forcing a shot down Tyler's throat, she wipes his lower lip with her thumb and then sucks said thumb. I scream for Caroline, but instead, Klaus appears. He's swilling from a bottle and celebrating Dean's life, too. Only he's angrier about it, seeing that one of his baby hybrids is dead. Tyler gets why that upsets Klaus, but not why he cares about Hunter Tyler's death. Klaus says he has his reasons. "Cheers."
There's a knock at the door. Caroline is here, finally, and she's returning a box full of Tyler's stuff. Aw. Klaus approaches and confirms she's met Hayley, then summons his hybrid guards, to give Tyler the chance to get dumped on his arse in relative private. Once Klaus is out the door, Caroline and Hayley share a sly smile. Hayley was totally cool the whole time. She gave Caroline the heads up about Klaus's impending arrival. Tyler and Caroline seal their still intact union with a sloppy kiss. Oh oh. Let the record show that Way-Cool Hayley seems less cool about that.
Gilbert Gables. As Elena showers, she hallucinates that the water is blood. Wow, Nina Dobrev has a beautiful back. I know that saying anything of Nina's is beautiful is hardly breaking news, but it's still worth noting, and much more pleasant to focus on than the blood pooling around her feet. If Buffy's Season Six was Season Sex, then The Vampire Diaries' Season Four is Season Gore. Out of the shower, she grabs a towel and gasps for breath that vampires shouldn't even need. We cut to the...
Kitchen. Our ever fastidious Damon is cleaning up Jeremy's blood and otherwise being obsessive-compulsive, when Stefan joins him. I love that Damon is a Felix. I just wish Stefan would be more of an Oscar, even when he's not in ripper mode. Jeremy's off to school to help Bonnie set up for some occult exhibit (and possibly to escape the house in which he was just murdered by his own sister).
Stefan hesitates to answer his phone when Klaus calls, but Damon says, "Quit avoiding him. You're being shady. Shady people get outed." Stefan answers the phone and says he doesn't want to talk about "it." Klaus is characteristically perturbed that he's lost both a hybrid and hunter, but they've got endless centuries in which to find a new path to the cure. He's just worried about one thing. "I'm concerned about your beloved. Have the hallucinations started, yet?" Stefan wants to know what Klaus knows about that. When Klaus learns Stefan is at Gilbert Gables, he's all, "How convenient..." Bee-Tee-Dubs, he's just outside. Did he walk there?
Stefan meets Klaus on the Gilbert Gables porch. Since he killed the original Brotherhood of the Five, he knows the score. "The hunters were spelled by witches to kill vampires. If you prevent one from fulfilling his destiny, then he'll take you down with him. [...] I mean Connor's death won't prevent him from making Elena his final vampire kill. She'll need to come with me, now. I'll lock her up." There's bickering between the two. She's not going anywhere with you. Blah blah blah. She'll kill herself if she doesn't. Blah blee bloo.
Elena's Room. Clean, showered and dressed, Elena looks in the mirror. When the ghost (or whatever) of Connor appears, she gasps and turns toward him. Connor wipes his fingers across his neck would and offers the drippings to Elena. This should give me chills or make me think of things to come, but instead I just start thinking about Thanksgiving Day gravy. I'm not hosting Thanksgiving, but I've got things to cook and buy. Why do I do this to myself? There's a lot of rationalization from Elena, but none of it helps me. It's all about her, per usual. Also, there's a lot of, "You're a monster," muahahaha from Connor. When Damon approaches, Elena still sees Connor instead, so she runs outside. Once she's on the porch, Klaus grabs her and Stealth-Salvatores her away. Damon looks at Stefan like, "YOU SUCK," which seems weird, because Damon's the one that let her run outside in the first place. Commercial.
Mystic Falls High School. Interior. Jeremy is inspecting his hunter's mark when Matt joins him. Jeremy asks Matt if he can see it, but of course he can't because it's a MAGICAL tattoo. Matt must be a Buffy fan, because he asks the Germ if this makes him a, "Chosen One," or something. The boys are interrupted by adorability incarnate: April.
Professor Shane is with April, and is that sort of friendly which is immediately suspect. He's carrying a rock which he claims is the world's oldest tombstone, but still manages to shake our boys' hands. Oh and he says his first name is Atticus, which makes me scream at my TV because Atticus Finch was the best, and Prof. Shane is clearly not. Oh my word, my husband is in the other room and just turned on the TV to find To Kill a Mockingbird. That's a sign. Be right back.
Two Hours Later...
All right. I'm a little distracted. Don't say I didn't warn you. After the professor begs off, April asks Matt and Jeremy why Shane is so familiar. They boys claim to have no clue, so April again asks about Rebekah's disappearance. She's the best friend Becky ever almost had! When April explains (again) that Rebekah was supposed to help her find out about the explosion, but then just disappeared, Matt and Jeremy sort of smirk at her. I love them both. You know I do, but right now, I think they suck. They know she's been compelled to forget things -- a fate these two share with April -- so their smirking is decidedly unbecoming. I tried to find a way around it. That is, I tried to interpret it in another way, like the smirks are really about Rebekah, but they're not. They're feeling superior to April, even though they've both been compelled more times than I can count. Stinkers. Let's all smirk at them until our rage passes, okay?
Gilbert Gables. Bonnie is there. She can't believe the boys lost Elena. They explain that Klaus took her and all about they Hunter's Curse that's currently haunting Elena, but Bonnie claims she can't help. Damon continues to treat Bonnie like she lives in his tool box. "Wave your magic wand. Hocus pocus. Be gone, hunter ghost-us." Bonnie says while the spirits won't let her harness the magic she'd need to break the curse, she can ask Shane for help because he knows everything. Satisfied, Stefan sets off to try and retrieve Elena from Klaus. Let me stick a pin in this moment. I'll be back to it, I swear.
Klaus Haus. Klaus shoves Elena into a beautifully appointed room. The windows have been bricked up to protect his art collection, which makes it an ideal setting for a soon to be suicidal baby vampire. Elena says she'd never kill herself, and everyone who watched the past two seasons laughs 'til their sides hurt. Klaus refrains from reminding her of her recent past by instead explaining his distant past. After he killed the Original Five, he fell under the Hunter's Curse for 52 years, 4 months and 9 days, not that he was counting, or anything! Yes, for yea long, Klaus was tormented by his supernatural victims. He tried to kill himself but couldn't because he's immortal and all. Elena wonders if Stefan knew this would happen if she killed Connor. Klaus sets her straight. "All he knew is that the hunter had to be kept alive. You should have listened to him when he said he had it covered, love." When Elena asks what else Stefan knew, Klaus evades the question and starts to leave the room. Realizing he won't be a party to her impending breakup with Stefan, Elena asks Klaus how he got the hunter-haunting to stop. Klaus: "I didn't. Eventually, it just stopped. The hallucinations tend to appear in strange forms. Don't say I didn't warn you."
Stefan is standing by his motorcycle on the side of the road when he calls Caroline and tells her about Klaus grabbing Elena. He's wondering if Tyler can lead away the other hybrids so that Stefan can free his girl. We cut to the Lockwood mansion. Stefan is there with Tyler and Caroline now, so I can't help but wonder why we had that shot of him with his bike. I don't think we got a long enough look at the bike for it to have been a product placement, but I can't figure out another reason. There's nothing wrong with it, of course, but considering all the dots this show has left unconnected over the years, it's amusing to me that it had to connect this one. YES, AUDIENCE, STEFAN FIGURED OUT CAROLINE IS AT TYLER'S BY USING THE TELEPHONE. NOW IT ALL MAKES SENSE. I have pies to make, Show.
Lockwood Mansion. Caroline and Stefan listen as Tyler explains about Hayley helping him break his sire bond. She came to Mystic Falls to help her friend Chris do the same. Being a Person of Color in Mystic Falls, Chris has bigger problems than a pesky sire bond, but will anyone warn him? No. No they will not. Seriously, I've lost count now, but considering there's only one regular character who isn't Caucasian, there sure have been a lot of minorities killed on this show: Grams, Bree, Abby (sort of), Connor, Pearl, Anna, the man witches, at least one other tomb vamp, Caroline's first victim, the girl Tyler killed (which resulted in him becoming a full-fledged werewolf). Who else? I'm sure one of you has tallied this up, so if you have the full list, shoot it to me on Twitter, where my friend Nicole is currently writing a song called, "And The Black Guy Always Dies." Back to the story... Tyler explains how he and Hayley plan to free the rest of the hybrids from Klaus's thrall. Intrigued, Stefan asks if Chris has regained his free will. Caroline confirms he has and we cut to...
Klaus Haus. Chris brings Elena an overnight bag and informs her that Klaus says she'll be staying there until he figures out where to put her. Let me also stick a pin in that comment and come back to it in a bit. Elena already hates everybody and everything, so she asks Chris to leave. He does, but the ghost of Connor appears in his place. He tells Elena he'll be with her, forever, then asks how it felt to drain the life out of him. Objection! While she did have a little snack, Elena didn't drain the life out of Connor. She bit him while confronting him, but then all she did was warn him to stay away from her brother. It was only after Connor staked her that Elena killed him, and she did so with a classic neck snap. I imagine the writers forgot because they too were distracted by the fact that Elena never wipes her mouth and still had blood pooling in her palms, even after she dragged his giant corpse out into the woods, dug a grave, and threw him in it. Just sayin'...
At first Elena says it was horrible to kill Connor, but he badgers her until she admits she liked killing him and loved the taste of his blood. He then turns the screw by reminding her that he had a family -- a brother and parents. When Elena says she's sorry, he asks if she's sorry about her own parents' death. They were only on Wickery Bridge, because they went to get her. When he vows to haunt her to her last breath, Elena says she won't let him do this to her. He continues to harp on the fact that she's a monster who deserves to die, so Elena turns away from him. It's then that Connor morphs into...
Katherine. Yay! Also, boo. I mean, hallucination-Katherine is better than no Katherine at all, but after the previews, I was hoping actual-Katherine would come to town and school Elena on life as a doppelgänger vampire. Anyhow, hallucination Katherine suggests she and Elena have a little chat. When Elena turns to face her new tormenter, Katherine says, "Did you miss me?" Oh, yes we so very much did, Kiki. Welcome back. Commercial.
Sidebar. Remember that pin I stuck in Stefan's decision to get Elena, and the other pink I stuck Chris's comment about Klaus only keeping Elena in that room until he figured out where to put here? Yeah, those pins. At first, I thought Stefan was foolish to waste time (and risk angering Klaus) by trying to help Elena escape. Klaus is every bit as motivated as Stefan to ensure that Elena stays alive long enough to be cured, and then continue the doppelgänger bloodline, right? Sure, Elena's not going to be happy about being held captive at Klaus Haus, but when is the last time Elena was happy? I'm thinking it had to be Season One, but I digress.
Sidebar, continued. At first, it annoyed me that Stefan didn't just enjoy the free babysitting and use the time to help Bonnie and Damon figure out how to break the Hunter's Curse. But Chris's comment that Klaus intends to move Elena makes Stefan's determination make sense. Now that Rebekah has been staked, no one in Mystic Falls knows Klaus better than Stefan. Stefan also surely suspects that it's likely once Klaus cures Elena, he'll spirit her away from the Falls to destinations unknown. Stefan must know that Klaus must know, that Stefan wouldn't be content to let Klaus use Elena (and her descendants) like a hybrid wet nurse. So, it works for me that Stefan is trying to free her. I think that's all. Right now, I'm more worried about whipped cream. I mean, homemade is easy to make, and far superior, but I've got to bring it to my cousin's house, and it's really best when freshly made. I'm not going to take over her kitchen to make whipped cream, when she has a house full of people. I should go with the canned stuff, yeah? I'm only asking, because my husband will be sure to call from the store. No, honey. Do not get whipped topping, even if it says it contains real dairy. Make sure it's actual whipped cream.
School. Professor Shane is presenting some occult exhibit, featuring the history of someone named Silas, and his tombstone, which people believe to be the first one in the world. No, I'm not going to research the history of tombstones. This show tells us that a thousand years ago, the Vikings were in Virginia -- as were horses. It's crazy, bad and wrong, but it also frees me from caring enough to bother to research any historical claim made during a given episode, so thank you, Show. When Shane mentions Whitmore College, April remembers that's where she knows Shane from. Her dad taught a theology seminar at Whitmore the year before. Fortunately, Matt and Jeremy are standing with her, and they hear what she says -- at least Matt does.
Shane exposits about Silas. He was a powerful witch who created a spell that would grant him immortality. Shane is struck with crazy-eye syndrome when he says immortality, so it's tempting to think I've got him all figured out. Silas created the spell with a witch who loved him. Her name was Qetsiyah. Really, show? What's wrong with Mary or Anne, or Sue? Now I have to remember how to spell Qetsiyah. Oh, that's right. I don't. I can just call her Q. Excellent. So, while Q was in love with Silas, Silas loved another and wanted to grant her with immortality. Q killed her rival and then buried Silas alive, leaving him powerless, immortal and alone. Shane: "This might actually be the origin story of 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned'." He botches the line, of course, but at least he doesn't attribute it to the Bard. During the presentation. Damon is standing with Bonnie. After the "scorned" thing, Damon asks Bonnie if she's got this. She nods and says she'll bring Shane to him. As Damon is walking out, Shane adds that it's said Silas wants to rise again, regain his power and wreak havoc on the world. When he adds, "Maybe we should be afraid," Bonnie almost looks like she's thinking there could be consequences to her new friendship, but I'm not holding my breath. After Shane is done, Bonnie tells him Q sounds like a badass. Shane: "Nothing compared to Silas." So is Shane Silas looking for a magical reboot, or is he just a nutty professor intent on either waking the beast or learning his ways?
Klaus Haus. Hallucination-Katherine is still haunting Elena, and to ensure she remains a fan favorite, she pretty much dishes out every criticism the Elena haters have spewed over the last couple of seasons. Normally, I'd defend my girl, but I'm so tired of everyone telling me how compassionate she is that I find this scene rather cathartic. Here's a sample of Kat's snark: "Don't you ever stop crying? Poor Elena, always the victim. Except now you're a killer." She points out that the girl Stefan fell in love with is gone. "You're like me, now. Maybe worse." Well, hardly. Elena cries some more. Katherine browbeats her and reminds her that once Stefan knew the real Katherine, he hated her. "Oh well, at least you still have Damon." At that, Elena charges at Katherine, and face plants on the bed because these hallucinations are only incarnate when they want you to knife your brother in the neck. The rest of the time, they're just free psychotherapy for the damned.
Bonnie and Shane find Damon waiting in Alaric's classroom. I love how the writers keep revisiting the fact that Damon is mourning one of the few people he actually loves. Shane is intrigued that Damon is a bit of a monster buff. Oh Shane, if you only knew, but perhaps you already do. Damon pulls out Jeremy's incomplete sketch of Connor's Hunter's Mark. Shane identifies it, and demands to know where Damon got it, so our Evil Pixie Monster lies that it came to him in a dream, and then asks about the Hunter's Curse. Shane's voice rises. "Why? You got a dead hunter in the trunk of your car, or something?" Don't worry, Shane. He's out in the woods. Here's the skinny: the legend says that if you kill a hunter, you are cursed to walk the earth in torment until a new hunter is awakened, and the legacy is passed on. In another shout-out to Buffy, Shane says, "They're called potentials." I know you'd expect me to enjoy these shout-outs, but they're working less for me, I think because none of the characters has hung a lantern on the references. Like, if Damon said, "Oh no. It's the curse of Season Seven," I'd be jumping for joy. But no. Anyhow, Shane offers to grab his research on the curse and leaves to get it. Okay, so he's doing a Silas exhibit in Mystic Falls, but he just happens to have his other research in the car, or something? Nuh uh.
Alone with Damon, Bonnie asks how they're supposed to find a potential. Damon says, "Yeah about that," and then pulls out his phone. "Little Gilbert, your services are needed." Well, that didn't need its own paragraph, did it? I suppose I could go back at add it to the one, but it's already pretty long. Recapping has completely ruined my ability to create proper paragraphs because what I try to do is write one paragraph per scene, sometimes more when the scene is complex. You don't care about that, though, so let's move on to the...
Lockwood Mansion. Chris arrives and tells Tyler to, "Make it fast. Klaus will be back soon." Tyler shakes his head. "No he won't." We cut to the...
Mystic Grill. Klaus is sitting at the bar when Caroline arrives. She's wearing a swanky tank/hater sort of dress, and after pointing out the fact that the Grill is in perfect condition even though Dean just got blown up in it the day before, she gets right to the point. The Fellowship of the Falls wants him to return Elena. Klaus admires the fact that they've sent Caroline to sweet talk him, but there's no way he's returning Elena. He claims it's because Elena needs his help, but come on. If he really cared about Elena's mental wellbeing, he'd be with her, trying to help her through the hallucinations. It's not like she could kill him.
Klaus turns the talk to Tyler and Hayley, and points out that if Tyler were still sire bound to him, he never would have hurt Caroline. "I wouldn't have let him." This is, of course, a big honking lie because when Tyler was under Klaus's thrall, he bit Caroline on Klaus's orders. Don't get me wrong. I enjoy the Caroline/Klaus dynamic, but it doesn't give me amnesia. Klaus offers Caroline a drink and smiles when she accepts.
Lockwood Mansion. Stefan and Tyler want Chris to help them get Elena out, and then he can run free. Chris points out that the hybrids will drag him back, but Tyler insists, "Hayley and I got your back. We'll make sure nothing happens." Oh, run, Chris. Look in the mirror. Recognize the fact that you're a Person of Color in this evil little town, and then run as fast as you can.
Klaus Haus. Hallucination Katherine continues to torment Elena and service the fandom. Bonnie lost her Grams and sort lost her absentee mom because of Elena. She probably secretly hates Elena, so she should just kill herself. Maybe it was worth it when she was human, but she's a monster now, and deserves to die.
Klaus Haus. Chris finds two hybrid guards outside Elena's room and tells them Klaus needs them, so he'll relieve them of their post. Once they're gone, Stefan arrives. Chris gives him the keys. Now run away, Chris. Run away.
Stefan finds Elena huddled on the floor. She doesn't see Stefan though. She sees Connor and begs him to stay away. Then she grabs something from the underside of the bed. I've seen people call it a sword, but despite the sound effect, I don't think it is. I think it might be a piece of the bed. Whatever it is, Elena plunges it into Hallucination Connor's gut, but of course Hallucination Connor is Actual Stefan. He falls to the floor in pain while Elena runs out. Now, I've seen criticism about the fact that the room wasn't baby proofed, but as I said, I don't think that was a sword. I think it was just a thing. What stands out more to me is that the post Stefan falls against is part wood. It seems to me she could have used her vampire strength to break off a piece and stake herself, so while the critique of Klaus's baby-proofing is inaccurate, it's not unwarranted. Commercial.
School. Bonnie asks Damon why she didn't know any of this stuff about Jeremy. Damon shrugs it off and gets in a dig at the same time. "The witch who loses her powers gets left out of the important conversations." Oh boy, when she goes dark, she is so going after Damon first. Then probably Elena. When Jeremy arrives, Bonnie explains that in order to free Elena from the curse, Jeremy has to kill a vampire. Jeremy: "Great. Give me a stake. I'll kill Damon right now." Damon: "Easy, Van Helsing. We'll get you one." Sorry, Damon haters. He doesn't mean he'll get him a stake, but rather another vampire.
On the phone with Stefan, Damon tells him they have a solution to their Elena problem. When Stefan explains that Elena ran from him, Damon's all, "Again," which would be funnier had it been Stefan who let Elena first escape from Gilbert Gables, but again, Damon was right there too. Anyhow, Stefan asks Damon to go find their girlfriend. "She's in bad shape. I tried to help her, but she attacked me. Listen, you go find her. All right? Talk her down. She'll listen to you. Just tell me what I need to do to end this." The deeper meaning of Stefan's words are not lost on Damon. I wonder how much Stefan is letting himself realize what he's said. We cut to the...
Mystic Grill. Caroline gets a text from Stefan that reads: "I lost Elena. I need a vampire to kill. I'll turn someone if I have to. Get an answer. Fast." Wow. He'll turn someone if he has to. Well, I guess he would. Stefan's love is always a bit obsessive. I think Salvatore love is, in general. Caroline giggles then comes clean with Klaus. She didn't just come there to get him to free Elena. She came there to distract him so Stefan could break Elena out, but then he lost her. As Klaus rushes out of the restaurant, Caroline grabs him. Klaus: "Caroline, you're beautiful, but if you don't stop talking, I will kill you." Caroline gambles by telling the truth. "They figured out how to stop the hallucinations." Klaus gives her ten seconds to fill him in.
As Elena makes her way to Wickery Bridge, Katherine and Connor continue to drive home the fact that she is a monster and deserves to die. Elena walks to the edge of the bridge and stares down at the water. It's then that Hallucination Miranda Gilbert appears. She takes a gentler approach, but her message is the same. Elena should be dead. In fact, she should have died when the family car plunged off the bridge. At her hallucination-mother's urging, Elena removes her daylight ring and throws it into the river. This scene is painful, but I'm so tired of Elena in pain that it's hard to engage, so why should I punish you people? Commercial.
After the ring is gone, Elena realizes she can't leave Jeremy, but Hallucination Mom tells Elena he's better off with her dead. He won't be alone. Instead of having a vampire for a sister, he'll have a ghost for a sister. She can help him, rather than hurt him. Elena cries and says she's sorry. "Mommy, I didn't mean to disappoint you." Miranda says she didn't, but she died and was supposed to stay dead. When Damon appears, Mama disappears. Elena tells him he was right. Vampires kill people. She adds that Stefan was right, too. She can't live with herself. Damon gently mocks her pessimism and suggests they go somewhere and talk about it. He then turns into Connor who says, "The sun will be up soon." As dawn is about to break, Damon realizes Elena isn't wearing her ring. We cut to the...
Lockwood Mansion. Chris bids Tyler and Hayley farewell, but as he opens the door to leave Klaus walks in. Chris backs up, but not quickly enough. Klaus throttles him because that's what we do on this show, and berates Chris for letting Elena go. Tyler tries to take the blame. Hayley tries to talk sense to Klaus, which is her first mistake. When he reacts the way Klaus always reacts (that is, overreacts, with threats, of course) Hayley tries to take the blame and claims she let Elena free. She'd rather die than end up as one of his sired bitches. Klaus tells the "little wolf" not to tempt him, then turns his attention back to Chris. "Your existence is to serve me. To please me. Do you understand?" Oh man, the slavery parallels here are disturbing. I mean, they could be great (not the slavery part, the parallel part) because Tyler and Hayley are like the hybrid underground railroad. But they're not going to be great, because Chris is a Person of Color in Mystic Falls.
Chris apologizes to Klaus, who tells him to go. As he heads out the door, Stefan confronts him and stabs him in the gut. Hayley screams. Then Jeremy arrives, carrying a big axe.
Wickery Bridge. Damon tells Elena they need to get her inside. Connor's talking at her too. Damon tries to explain the curse, and that they know how to break it, but Elena's paying more heed to Connor's insistence that she kill herself. We cut to the...
Lockwood Mansion. When Tyler yells, "What the hell, man?" Stefan says, "I'm sorry." Maybe so, but he's not sorry enough. He nods at Jeremy who raises his axe over the still fallen Chris's neck and brings it down with a vengeance. Face spattered with blood, Jeremy looks down at his hand as his mark grows. Our little Potential is now a Chosen One. Let's just hope he doesn't sleep with Spike. Hayley screams again. She probably already got the visual.
Back on the bridge, Hallucination Connor disappears for real. Elena can feel the difference and tells Damon, "He's gone." Damon tells her it's okay, but it's not because dawn has broken enough to set Elena on fire. Damon grabs her and jumps into the water, below. Commercial.
Gilbert Gables. Damon is keeping watch in Elena's room. He sees that she's woken and has noticed her ring is safely back on her finger. He fished it out of the river for her. "Little tip. Vampires hate to swim." That's a nice tip of the hat to classic vampire mythology. Elena feels more like herself. Her head is clear, now. She says she can remember everything, but not like she lived it. Just like it was a bad dream. Okay, if she can remember everything, why was she surprised to see her ring? When did Damon get the ring, if not when they both jumped in the water? For that matter, how did he get her home, if he didn't get the ring then? I'd rather have seen that scene then Stefan standing on the side of the road having a two second phone call with Caroline before showing up at Tyler's to talk to her, but I'll let it go.
Elena's eyes light up when she thanks Damon for saving her. He cracks about teenage suicide, but Elena is in the mood for meaningful conversation. When Damon sits on her bed, she takes his hand and gives him a look that conveys a lot more than gratitude. Damon winces. He looks down at their hands, but doesn't pull away, even though he sighs. "I'm about to take a very high and annoying road, and tell you something because I know you think Stefan has been lying to you, which... yeah, he has. But this rough patch you two have been going through is not what you think. Everything that he's been doing, he's been doing for you, to help you. And after he kills me for telling you this, I want you to throw my ashes off the Wickery Bridge. Okay? There may be a way out of this for you, Elena. There may be a cure."
Lockwood Mansion. As Hayley sleeps it off, on the couch, Tyler's sitting to her, boozing it up. Caroline enters and tells Tyler they had no choice but kill Chris. Tyler explains that he promised Chris he'd have his back. If he helped them, he'd be free. Caroline: "We needed to help our friend." While Caroline doesn't consider Chris a friend, Tyler does, and is revolted by sacrificing one friend to save another. "He's like me. He's part of my pack. All he wanted to do was be unsired by that disgusting piece of..." After a beat, he asks how Caroline even got Klaus to agree to sacrifice a hybrid. Caroline: "I agreed to go on a date with him. I just thought it might help keep up the ruse between you and Hayley."
Rising to his feet, Tyler looks at Caroline, pours himself another drink and then throws the glass against the wall. Hayley wakes and asks what's going on. Tyler: "Nothing. Nothing at all. Just celebrating the life of a fallen hybrid friend." Caroline's eyes widen, in horror, but I can't decide if she's horrified by her part in Chris's murder, or by the fact that suddenly, way cool Tyler has returned to his season one 'Roid Rage ways.
Sidebar. I've seen a lot of discussion about how the Fellowship of the Falls murdered an innocent hybrid to save Elena -- a known killer. Um. Hybrids are made when Klaus turns a werewolf into a vampire. Or adds vampire to the mix. You know what I mean. You have to start with a werewolf to even get a hybrid. On this show, certain people carry the werewolf gene. But they're only carriers unless or until they kill someone. It's killing that awakens their werewolf nature. Now sure, Chris could have killed someone by accident. We don't know his backstory. That said this isn't a court of law. I don't have to presume he's innocent. That doesn't mean I don't think what Caroline (and the others) did is not morally complex. It is. But when we were thick in the hybrid story, not too many of them seemed all that innocent. I agree Chris was portrayed as sympathetic. And he helped the very people who then betrayed him to his death. That's all dark and twisted enough. I don't need to assume he's innocent to think so.
Mystic Grill. Damon orders a bourbon, changes his order to two bourbons and leaves one in front of Alaric's empty stool. Aw. The gesture is not lost on Matt. He knows Damon doesn't like him, but he's got intel on the explosion at Pastor Cliche's ranch. He explains that April mentioned her father knew Professor Shane. "Which wouldn't be creepy, except he had all that info about the Hunter's Curse. We live in a town where, you know, anybody who knows stuff is creepy until proven otherwise." See, that's what I was trying to say about Chris. Thank you, Pudding Pop. Damon smiles. "You're on the verge of impressing me. Drive it home." Matt: "I got the sheriff to dig up the pastor's phone records. It turns out that he made a call a day to the same number, the last month he was alive. And on the day the Council got blown up at the farm, he called it ten times -- the office of Professor Atticus Shane.
Shane's Office. Shane asks Bonnie if Damon got everything he needed from his files. Bonnie says yeah and thanks him. She asks how Shane knows all this stuff. He says he's been around the world ten times over and studied every known supernatural. Witches are the most powerful, so he's in her corner, all the way. "When your new hunter -- and I know you have one -- when he completes his mark, you're going to want to come to me, 'cause I'm going to be the only one who can help. Trust me on that, okay. The only one."
Gilbert Gables Porch. Elena comes outside and apologizes to Stefan for stabbing him. He laughs that he probably had it coming. Well yeah, but not in that particular moment. He knows Damon told her about the cure. He's glad to be free of the lies and secrets. They all want the same thing and just have to work together for it. When Stefan sits on the steps, Elena follows suit and then asks him why he sent Damon to look for her instead of coming himself. Stefan: "I sent him because lately, it seems like he's able to get through to you in ways that I can't. You'll listen to him. You trust him, even when you can't trust me." Elena tries to explain that she didn't mean to not trust Stefan, but he cuts her off. "After everything that we've been through, you can admit it." Elena just nods. Finally she tells Stefan he's been so strong for her. "Helping me. Fighting for that girl that chose you -- the girl that I was when I died on the bridge. And I love you so much for wanting to find this cure because I'd like nothing more than to get her back. The girl that she's become -- that -- that I've become is different, somehow. Darker. Who I am. What I want..." Stefan: "What you want, or who you want." You mean whom here, sweetie. He goes with who. Him goes with whom. She doesn't want he. She wants him. Get it? Got it? Good. Let me just pause here to apologize to editorial, and all of you gentle readers, because by picking on Stefan's grammar, I've just doomed myself to missing a bunch of embarrassing errors when I proof, and cursed editorial to miss them too.
Elena purses her lips and looks down. "Something's changed between Damon and me. Much more than it ever used to be. It's like everything I ever felt for him before I was a vampire..." Stefan: "It's been magnified. Your feelings for him have been magnified." Elena says she's sorry. She doesn't want to lie to Stefan, though. Stefan says, "Before, when I was the Ripper... I understood why you cared for him. I mean, I practically drove you to it, but now... I can't do this, Elena. Not anymore." Elena nods. Her voice is choked with tears when she says, "I know." They sit in silence as we zoom out and into the title card.
I've got things to do and I'm sure you do too, so let's wrap this up, since I already discussed my reaction to the breakup in the recaplet. I've seen people wondering why Elena's feelings for Stefan haven't also been magnified. This is how I make sense of it: first of all, Elena already had Stefan. He was her lover. That relationship is already more fully realized, so there isn't an unfulfilled yearning aspect to Stefan and Elena's relationship. Secondly, I think some of Elena's feelings for Stefan have been magnified. It's just that those feelings are negative because he's been trying to control her and has been lying to her. Yes, it's been for her own good, but even knowing that doesn't erase all of that resentment. Plus, above and beyond Elena's... oh no, I have to use the C word -- above and beyond her compassion, Elena hasn't been able to explore her vampiric nature without feeling that in doing so, she is disappointing Stefan. I don't want Elena to turn into an unrepentant killer. I do want her to get past this morose feeling that overwhelms her so. I want her to be enjoyable, not just pitiful. Who wants to watch their heroine, week after week, be completely joyless? Not this recapper.
I'll be back a week from Friday with coverage of "My Brother's Keeper." In the meantime, if you celebrate it, I hope you have a lovely Thanksgiving. And regardless of where you are or what you do, please grade the episode at the top of the page and then come on over to the forum, where we're breaking up with Stefan on the front porch, because darn it, we have pies to make.