By LuluBates
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.An earthquake rocks New York City (which isn't particularly exciting unless it's done in full CGI, and it wasn't), but the quakes are not plate tectonics in action, but alien motherships making an entrance. Anna, the face of their organization, claims they come in peace in search of communion and a mineral. The aliens are overjoyed to find out they are not alone in the universe and they are sorry for, you know, scaring the tuna salad out of everyone on the entire planet and causing the priest to question his calling. But since everyone needs religion in a time of aliens, at least the priest has job security. While the Vatican is on board with the Visitors as part of god's plan, the priest takes a more skeptical view, especially when the Vs start recreating the Biblical miracles. His doubts are solidified when a dying man shows up in his church and directs him to an underground group that is organizing against the V invasion. They know what the Visitors really want and they are fighting back.
The FBI agent formerly known as Juliet from Lost tries to juggle terrorist alerts, alien invasions and single motherhood. Gloria Steinem would be proud. While the rest of the world is learning all about aliens, she and her partner are sticking with their day jobs and tracking a terrorist cell. They unearth a stockpile of C4 and track the clues to a group of conspiracy theorists. The group believes the Vs have been on Earth for years, have reptile faces, and embedded themselves into every level of government, faith and life in order to foment unrest. Once the world is full of strife, the Vs swoop in and offer peace, tranquility, and, er… universal health care. Well, if Congress can't do it, I guess the Vs are the best choice. Agent Erica doesn't believe any of it until the priest shows the hard-won proof of Vs amongst us. Agent Erica hasn't been tracking a terrorist cell, but a sleeper cell of Vs.
Unbeknownst to her, Agent Erica's teenage son gets tickets to tour the mothership and ends up falling for a mother of a hot alien. Hormones are universal, apparently. And so are cults. The alien hottie encourages him to join the Vs' "Peace Ambassador Program," and brainwashes him into thinking that tagging "V" all over the place is an awesome way to spread their message. You would have thought they would do better market research about what earthlings find annoying.
And Scott Wolf makes his triumphant return to television as an intrepid reporter who discovers the Visitors have an important and valuable characteristic: a sense of flirting. More importantly, Anna, the lead alien, takes a personal interest in him. She offers him a private one-on-one… interview on national television. Things go badly when his journalistic integrity is put on the line. But he's only about 70% ethical, and he swaps that in exchange for easy fame and a direct line to the V front office.
Before the secret meeting can progress and form a plan, the Vs launch a surprise attack, killing everyone in sight. It's a brutal scene, and Agent Erica struggles for a gun while the priest gets in a few good whacks. The leader of the group has been trying to get his friend Ryan to join the resistance, and he does, but when Ryan reveals he is a rebel V, no one knows what to think. When Agent Erica's partner shows up, she's relieved to see him, until he chokes the relief right out of her. Guess he's the one who's been tipping off the sleeper cell. Also, he has reptile skin under his face.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Our delightful redux of the celebrated 80s mini-series starts off with a question: Where were you when JFK was shot? Watching Mad Men, obviously. And then another question: Where were you on 9/11? In New York City, nothing funny about that. And then another: Where were you this morning? Well, since you asked...I woke up in a gutter in Dubai, which isn't as bad it sounds because in Dubai, gutters are lined with down comforters and masseuses. It is 6:30 in the morning and our trusty leading FBI agent is still in bed. What, our tax dollars can't pay you to get up by 6 a.m.? Crime doesn't sleep, agent, and neither should you. Where's your work ethic, missy? This is America and you are her representative. Elizabeth Mitchell (more notably known as Juliet from Lost) plays the lazy narcoleptic FBI agent and she only deigns to open her eyes when the bed starts a-rockin'. She wakes up and goes to ask her son if he felt (or caused) the tremor. He is a boy after all. Unfortunately, her son is not there to play scapegoat so Ms. Mitchell should investigate her own diet (and maybe re-consider picking the tostada bar at the Sizzler for lunch). She calls her son to yell at him and he is brave enough to answer her phone call despite the fact that he didn't go home. She is going to feel so bad when she finds out he's in the hospital and she's yelling.
Over at the friendly neighborhood church, the priest opens the doors and greets the homeless who are sleeping there because he is a Man of God and loves all. Even the stinky ones. Know what he does not love? Tremors. Because they are rather obvious intimations that the End of Days is nigh and he still hasn't seen the Brewers win the World Series. So obviously he has displeased the Lord God Almighty somehow. Meanwhile, Scott Wolf makes his triumphant return to television and simultaneously showers and appears on television as reporter Chad Decker. He is a serious journalist. You can tell because he is reporting on foreclosures and not even Ryan Seacrest does that. He opens the shower door and the camera cuts to a different door opening before giving us even the slightest soupcon of Scott Wolf's freshly-showered self. Cruel and unusual behavior if you ask me. The new door opens to Morris Chestnut buying a ring at a jeweler's. We see a photo of him squeezing the girl from ER and 24 who is not quite famous enough for me to know her real name, but definitely qualifies as a "Hey It's That Girl!" She has a lot of books open, so obviously she is a student. Or Bob Cratchit. She has no focus, though, because the second the ground starts shaking, she gets distracted. You'll never make the Dean's List with that attention span, missy!