Episode Report Card Pablo G: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT The Kim Jong-illest
By Pablo G | Season 1 | Episode 5 | Aired on 10.20.2010
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.A renowned particle physicist in North Korea steals a device purported to be able to alter the state of solid matter. Is it like a blow dryer, or something you can use to melt ice cubes? We don't know. We never see the device used. When North Korean authorities catch on that he's stolen the device, Physicist's Daughter is kidnapped. Physicist wants to defect to America, but on the condition his daughter is found and reunited with him so he can get her out of the country.
The Blooms are on the case and are quickly able to snag Physicist at a symposium in Geneva and get him to safety, just as the North Korean authorities are about to detain him. They keep him stashed in a hotel room while they directly disobey Carlton Shaw's directive to stay out of North Korea to find Physicist's Daughter. It's no fun when the Blooms' bumbling will be behind Shaw's back. I guess we just need to imagine his theoretical exasperation this time out.
Once in North Korea, the Undercovers find that two French intelligence operatives are on the scene to try and swoop in and get Physicist to defect to France, because word got out that the CIA would not operate in North Korea. They offer to work jointly with the Blooms, and once Physicist's Daughter is extracted from the North Korean police, they quickly pull a double-cross. Even the Blooms saw this coming and were not competent enough to outmaneuver it. It'd be nice if the times where our heroes aren't perfect they aren't also completely inept.
The French operatives hold Physicist's Daughter hostage for ransom of the glorified blow dryer, but the Blooms beat the crap out of them, as they are known to do, and reunite Physicist and Physicist's Daughter, convincing him to defect to America. USA! USA!
But you know what the downside is to all of this? Samantha missed Lizzy's commemoration of being sober for 90 days. It's hard balancing the world-saving duties of a secret agent with affirming your screw-up of an alcoholic sister. Can I get an empathetic "Uh-huh! That's right"?
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Pablo G. is some guy who lives in San Antonio, Texas. He co-hosts TWoP's original "Trailers Without Pity" with his brother Omar G. Check him out at Space Monkeys!, The Cowboys Blog, and follow him @PendejoJoe on Twitter.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!We begin tonight with Lizzy on the phone. That's odd. What could possibly be interesting about Lizzy without the Blooms around? Lizzy: "At some point they're going to figure it out." Oh. Oh my. But really, these shady phone conversations with mystery men about the Blooms' real reason for reactivation need to stop. The more interesting mystery is how this show is still on the air. Lizzy has to get off the phone because Sam calls to her, and Lizzy pretends that she had been rummaging through Samantha's closet for clothes. She comes out with a few dresses to model so Sam can help her decide what to wear for her celebration of 90 days being sober. I wish somebody would celebrate when I'm sober. Then the celebration would never end. Lizzy wants to wear a black dress, but black dresses are obviously something Sam would need for her super-secret doings. Sam lies about needing it for going to dinner with Steven for their first date anniversary trip to San Francisco. Are we sure Lizzy has been sober this whole time, because at this point she must be drunk not to catch on to San Francisco being a big lie. Steven walks in and is more polite than usual in congratulating Lizzy's sobriety, even offering a hug. Lizzy reiterates how important it is to her for Samantha to be in attendance for her celebration. Sam looks her in the eye and tells her she's not going to miss this. That means she's going to miss this.
North Korea at night. We appear to be at some sort of military installation. A man in a ski mask lurks in the shadows outside and watches guards walk by. He times his movement to theirs and sneaks into a building using a key code. Masked Man runs through staircases and hallways and opens up another door with another key code. A guard happens to notice Masked Man on surveillance and sounds the alarm. Masked Man enters yet another room with a key code. So the only way this whole stunt is impressive is if this is not an inside job and this guy does not work for this installation. The last room he enters is a server room. Naturally, Masked Man needs to enter one more key code to open up the cabinet containing our coveted device of the week. He snags it just as guards enter the room. There's no trace of Masked Man except for an open window. Masked Man hangs from the ledge under the window as a guard peers out and then walks away. The window just below Masked Man happens to be open and another man helps him climb in and change out of his skulking attire. Underneath, Masked Man is Business Man, wearing a suit and looking rather nerdy and anxious. The room he has crept back into is a small, run-of-the-mill office with two work stations, and Business Man takes his desk across from his friend just as guards throw open the door. Business Man sits at his desk calmly, but sweaty as the head guard informs him and his co-worker of the break-in. The head guard totally suspects Business Man and just stares at him for a long time until Business Man cites the A/C being broken for his sweating. If it weren't for the window bit, that would be the most impressive part of this whole heist scene.