Quickfire Challenge: Create a sophisticated dish by choosing three ingredients from a conveyer belt. Guest judge is Eric Ripert. They can wait as long as they want to choose their ingredients, but it means they will have less time to cook. Some people grab ingredients right off, while others just start cooking something basic and wait for ingredients to incorporate. Turns out the ingredients don't really matter since Chris gets lobster and foie gras and still ends up in the bottom. Bev screws up and one of her ingredients doesn't make it on the plate, so she can't win, but Padma and Eric tell her that she would have won if it had. So the second place dish but also the winner belongs to Lindsay, who made a bouillabaisse.
Elimination Challenge: Create a seven course Gothic feast fit for an evil queen, portrayed by Charlize Theron, who will be the guest judge because she's playing the evil queen in a new Snow White movie. Here are the dishes:
Ed: tuna tartare with black garlic ponzu and Asian pear vinaigrette. He plates it with the darker sauce on one side and the lighter sauce on the other to signify good and evil. The judges love everything about his dish, including the fried fish scales he put on top.
Paul: foie gras with bacon, pumpernickel, pickled cherries, and beets. He puts all of the food along the edge of the plate to make an "enchanted forest" and then puts a big bloody handprint in the middle of the plate. Emeril is shocked that the elements came together, because it could have gone horribly wrong, and everyone loves the dish. This is a lovefest so far.
Beverly: seared halibut with red curry coulis and forbidden black rice. Her story is that the halibut is Snow White, and she's prevailing over evil, represented by the red and black. The judges think the fish is cooked perfectly and, once again, have nothing bad to say.
Lindsay: seared scallop over "Witch's stew" and dragon beans. The judges all love how well the scallop is cooked, and Tom can't get over how good the stew is.
Sarah: amarone risotto with lamb heart. Because it was cooked in wine, the risotto is red. The judges like the flavors, although they aren't quite as effusive as they were about some of the other dishes.
Grayson: black chicken with roasted, pickled beets, quail eggs, and foie gras. Her dish looks like a slaughterhouse, between the whole chicken with head left on and pieces of beets that kind of look like entrails. The judges love the presentation, and also think the flavors are good.
Chris: poisoned apple and cherry pie. He froze an apple and used Gummi worms and rice crispies to represent worms and maggots. And then there is cherry pie inside so that when you cut it open, it looks like guts. It's actually pretty cool. The good new for Chris is that the judges think the flavors are good too, and Tom is giddy over the presentation.
The judges agree that this has been their best meal of the season, and it's going to come down to small glitches in determining who goes home. The winner for the night is Paul. I'm really surprised because some of the other dishes seemed more impressive and technically difficult.
The bottom three are Sarah, Beverly, and Grayson. Padma admits that they all did well. Sarah's risotto was slightly undercooked with too much cheese. Beverly didn't get super creative, and her sauce was a bit too sticky. Grayson got really creative, but some of her elements didn't quite fit in. And the cheftestant who is eliminated is…Beverly. Whew. I mean, she's a weirdo and she couldn't even make the weirdest dish? And all of her food was pretty same-y. Very well done, for the most part, but same-y.
After Restaurant Wars, the teams are all feeling kind of down. Sarah interviews that she still thinks Lindsay should have won the challenge, because she held the team together. Okay, but that's not how the winner is determined. It's usually food first, and then they look at other things if the food is fairly equal. It's not Top Front of House, SARAH. Just admit you hate Beverly and you hate that she won and move on. Chris shares with the group that the judges told them that they really need to step it up. So this episode will either feature them stepping it up, or possibly feature them failing even more. No middle ground.
Tom pops his head into the room of mourners and Sarah immediately goes, "Nooooooooo!" Oh, welcome Tom, great to see you. I get that she's exhausted and thinks that his appearance means that they will have to cook again soon, but that's just rude. Tom actually doesn't have terrible news; he just tells them that they're going to San Antonio. I don't know why this show thinks it's The Amazing Race, Texas-style, and has to inform us of where the cheftestants are going, and when. Just open the episode in San Antonio and have a quick voiceover that says, "After Restaurant Wars, we headed back to San Antonio." Done. We'll figure out how they got there. Although I guess the voyage is ample opportunity for product placement, so there's that.
The cheftestants drive back to San Antonio, still segregated into men and women. Chris is disappointed that he hasn't won any challenges, and all of the men discuss how the women are probably pissed that Bev won the challenge. Over in the women's car, things are tense. Beverly interviews that she thinks Lindsay is sour that she lost. Beverly spends a lot of time thinking about how the other people feel about her. Maybe she should just rise above. RISE ABOVE, BEVERLY. Anyway, Lindsay talks about how hard it was to manage the servers and everything and no one really responds because who cares? Can we cook something now? How about now?
The morning, the cheftestants gather for a meal. They talk about what they think will happen in upcoming challenges, and they decide that they'll be individual challenges with a focus on creativity. Paul considers Ed to be his main competition, but he's also worried about Sarah and her classical training.
The cheftestants arrive at the kitchen for the Elimination Challenge and find Eric Ripert waiting there with Padma. Ed notices that there's a conveyer belt in the back, so he's worried. Padma explains that they get thirty minutes to create a dish. When time starts, the conveyer belt will start moving, and there will be ingredients on it. Each cheftestants has to choose and use three ingredients from the belt; the rest can be selected from the pantry. Eric Ripert adds that the longer they wait, the better the ingredients available, but that also takes away from their cooking time.
Time starts. A few people head right for the belt, but most people go to the pantry and start picking out basic ingredients that can be combined with a lot of other things so they can start cooking and just incorporate as they go. Ed grabs macadamia nuts from the belt without a clear plan. That's probably not a great idea. Then Ed grabs a jar of sauerkraut. Those two ingredients sound terrible together. Actually, jarred sauerkraut sounds terrible, period.
Everyone keeps running up to the conveyer belt, standing there for a minute, scowling, and then running back to his or her station. These ingredients are awful: Pop Rocks, a cucumber, Rice Krispies. Chris spots a pot of lobsters so he runs over to the belt to wait for them to come around, but they don't come back around. Heh. The producers are having fun with this. Paul gets impatient and just grabs saffron, Wonder bread, and bitter melon. Yikes. Grayson gets desperate and takes goldfish crackers. Sarah takes saltines, because she's become convinced that there won't be any great ingredients at all. Beverly hasn't taken any ingredients off the belt yet, I don't think. Chris has another miss on the lobster, and then Beverly gets desperate and takes Rice Krispies, tofu, and black-eyed peas.
This challenge reminds me of a game my friend and I used to play as tweens where we would mix together various items from the fridge and spice cabinet and then dare one another to eat them. The lobsters are back! Chris runs over and grabs one out of the bucket just as it passes through into the back, then nearly drops it, but manages to hang on. Those poor lobsters. There are ten minutes left when Lindsay grabs grouper and clams and decides to make a bouillabaisse. She realizes that she's cooking fish for Eric Ripert, the fish expert, and she's worried. Everyone seems to have grabbed a protein at some point, although we missed seeing it. Cooking, cooking, drums, drums, drums, time's up! Beverly forgot to put her curried Rice Krispies on her dish. Oops.
Ed's dish is up for tasting first, and his three ingredients were macadamia nuts, sauerkraut, and black truffle, and he made sauerkraut soup, shrimp, and shaved truffle. Chris got lobster, foie gras, and vanilla, so his dish should be awesome with all those expensive ingredients, right? He made butter poached lobster with foie gras. I really hate people who call foie gras just "foie." Like you're too busy to see the second word. CHRIS. Grayson got goldfish, grapefruit, and Dover sole. That sounds awful. She made butter poached dover sole with goldfish and rosemary. I'm going to admit right now that one time I made chicken breast with a goldfish crust. It might have been Cheez-its, but same idea. It was terrible. They are just so strong in flavor and oily. Not good. Grayson can't stop laughing at her dish.
Paul had Wonder bread, saffron, and bitter melon, so he made mussels in ginger and bitter melon broth. Paul thinks he screwed himself over by choosing the bitter melon. Sarah got artichokes, Saltines, and cottage cheese, and she made fried soft shell crab with cottage cheese sauce. I really hate cottage cheese. It's so...lumpy. Sarah laughs that she's never made a sauce like this before, and she can't believe she's serving it to Eric Ripert. In addition to the grouper and clams, Lindsay also got Pernod, so she made bouillabaisse in fennel-Pernod broth.
Beverly got tofu, Rice Krispies, and black-eyed peas, and she made glazed sockeye salmon and black-eyed peas. Let's get it started! Sorry. Anyway, she mentions that she forgot the Krispies and Eric asks to try them anyway, knowing that they Beverly's disqualified since she didn't use all three of her chosen ingredients. Ed thinks that Beverly should have cheated by throwing her Rice Krispies in the air and hoping they landed on the plate. I'm surprised we don't see more of that type of thing.
So which dishes did Eric hate? He didn't like Chris's lobster dish, because it didn't come together. He thought the citrus overwhelmed Grayson's dish, and Paul's bitter melon was too bitter. Okay, fine. Whose dishes did he like? He liked Sarah's dish, because it went well together, Lindsay's dish, because her flavors worked well, and he thought Beverly did well with her tofu, especially considering he doesn't like tofu. Padma says that it's a shame that Beverly didn't use all three ingredients, because she would have won this challenge "by a mile." So who did win? Lindsay! She acknowledges that the win is kind of a back-handed compliment because they told her flat out that her dish was really second best and she's winning on a technicality.
Elimination Challenge! Padma says that they'll be cooking a dish fit for a queen. Chris cracks me up for the first and only time this year when he says, "The Queen of England? Queen...Latifah?" Something about how he said Latifah was so funny to me. Anyway, Padma spends a long time trying to build up suspense, like we didn't already see the previews and know she's about to introduce Charlize Theron, who is playing the Evil Queen in an upcoming Snow White movie. Sarah is super giddy because God forbid she have a normal reaction to seeing a celebrity. And frankly, I'm surprised Beverly isn't crying, but then again, she might not know who Charlize Theron is. Would you be surprised? Charlize tells them that she's a big fan of the show and she loves food. Ugh, is she one of those celebrities who's like, "I was ugly as a kid and I loooooove to eat now!" I hate those celebrities. Anyway, the challenge is to create a Gothic feast fit for an evil queen. Charlize encourages them to indulge and get creative. It's nice to finally see them get a challenge where they don't have tons of weird restrictions, and can just make food and present it in a cool and unusual way. And thank GOD it's not another team challenge.
Shopping! Anyone else say that in a Paz de la Huerta voice every time? Just me? Paul says that he's making an enchanted forest, and Grayson plans to make chicken, but to mutilate it on the plate and make it look like a crime scene. Yum? Sarah explains that her most important ingredient is red wine because she's cooking risotto and she wants it to be blood red. Then there's a montage of Beverly in the grocery store, bumping into people and saying sorry. At one point, she even bumps into a display rack and apologizes. She's a mess. Lindsay explains that her dish is based on a dish she had while in college that changed the way she saw food. It had dragon beans, which I didn't even know were a thing.
Back at home, the chefs talk about their dishes. Ed jokes that he should just take a jar of pigs' blood and spray it all over the room. Chris explains that he's making an apple dish that will have maggots and worms. Sounds appetizing! He's also way too into describing it and grabbing onto Ed's shoulder and you can tell that Ed is just thinking, "Stop touching me, stop TOUCHING ME YOU FREAK!" I might be projecting. Then Chris calls his wife and talks about how she's his strength and biggest fan and you think, "Uh oh, he's going home tonight."
The chefs sit around and go over their game plan. I guess Paul is helping everyone figure out who needs to use which equipment and who needs to be in what space when so there aren't any conflicts once they are in the kitchen and cooking. This seems so smart. Did they do this every season or just this one? Anyway, Paul gives a speech about respecting space and other people's ingredients and Lindsay explains that multiple people have had trouble with Beverly taking over their space or stealing their ingredients. And we have seen that multiple times this season. I don't think she's malicious; I think she's oblivious.
The cheftestants arrive at the kitchen and start prepping. Ed will be serving first, and he explains that he's making two sauces, one white and one dark, to represent the struggle between good and evil. Paul is making a dish with many, many components and he's worried about his ability to juggle them all. Beverly says that she's making halibut and forbidden rice. Paul interviews that he thinks Beverly is making halibut as kind of an eff you to Lindsay, since Lindsay accused her of screwing up her halibut in the last challenge. Paul adds that Beverly has more cooking experience than anyone else in the house, and people underestimate her. I do think they're wrong to treat her poorly because she hasn't been in charge of a restaurant or whatever, but she is kind of annoying and a weirdo. They've been overly mean to her, but I also get why they are frustrated. Let's not pretend that Beverly is a hapless victim; as I said, she just seems oblivious as to why people might be unhappy with her.
Lindsay talks more about her dish; it's scallops over a witch's stew, and she explains that she first had it when she started working with Michelle Bernstein. Lindsay should just marry Michelle Bernstein if she loves her so much. She never stops talking about her. Sarah is cooking lamb's heart, which she knows is an unusual ingredient, but she thinks it's appropriate for a serial killer, which is how Charlize described her character.
Grayson is cooking black chicken, which looks appropriately disgusting, but is also very lean so she has to be careful of overcooking. Chris plans to use liquid nitrogen at the table and if there were ever a challenge where his weirdo theatrics were needed, it's this one. Paul's juggling is failing; he's burned two of his ingredients. That's actually not bad, percentage-wise, but he is concerned about his ability to execute his dish.
The judges and guests arrive; in addition to Tom and Padma, we have Emeril, Eric Ripert, and Charlize Theron. They're sitting in a super Gothic looking room that fits the theme. That would be a fun dinner, though I don't know if I would want to eat some of the grosser-looking dishes. Time is almost up for the cheftestants, and Ed is first to serve, so he's plating. He explains that the last thing he puts on his plate is deep-fried fish scales, and the scales ended up looking like spikes. He feels good about the dish he's sending out.
So as mentioned, the first dish is from Ed: tuna tartare with black garlic ponzu and Asian pear vinaigrette. He plates it with the darker sauce on one side and the lighter sauce on the other to signify good and evil. Padma likes the fish scales, and Eric Ripert likes the two sauces, which even taste good when combined. Tom makes a joke about how good and evil combined equals a politician. Tom is at his most charming tonight. I know he's a married man, presumably happily, but I think he's trying to impress Charlize. Stay tuned. Anyway, Tom thinks the dish is well done. Charlize likes the black garlic, and says that she could eat it every day.
Paul plates his food. He puts all of the food along the edge of the plate to make an "enchanted forest" and then puts a big bloody handprint in the middle of the plate. Gloved hand, of course. When the servers bring it out, the judges are all, "Oooh!" except Eric Ripert who's like, "I hope he used a gloved hand." Paul explains that his dish represents an enchanted forest with ingredients that are both good and bad, so he made foie gras with bacon, pumpernickel, pickled cherries, and beets. Charlize and Padma are very into the plating, and Charlize says that it's good that Eric is scared, because that's kind of the point. Eric likes the pickled jalapenos in the dish, and all of the judges are really enthusiastic about the dish in general.
While the judges wait, Charlize talks about her movie some more and Tom cracks some jokes. He seriously is flirting. Tom! Beverly serves . She made seared halibut with red curry coulis and forbidden black rice. Her story is that the halibut is Snow White, and she's prevailing over evil, represented by the red and black. She uses the word "bleedingness." Her dish looks pretty boring compared to what we've seen thus far. But the flavors are good, according to the judges.
Lindsay explains that she didn't use any wicked ingredients like organs or hearts, because that's not her style. Instead, she serves seared scallop over "Witch's stew" and dragon beans. Everyone agrees that the scallops are cooked to perfection and Tom can't get over how good the stew is. Tom jokes that the queen would make this stew out of peasants. Tom with the wisecracks! Padma comments that Lindsay has immunity but she might not need it.
Sarah is not worried about her risotto, even though she made risotto before and Chef Tim Love didn't like it. She thinks her dish is perfect as it is, and she loves the lamb's heart too. Her dish is served to the judges: amarone risotto with lamb heart. Eric likes the flavors, and Tom likes how the various flavors combine. Charlize only wants to eat the heart because it's so good. It's weird that they're not showing us ANY negative comments about any of the dishes. There had to be some, right?
Grayson is a little concerned about how grotesque her dish looks, but she has decided to go for it whole hog. She serves black chicken with roasted, pickled beets, quail eggs, and foie gras. She left the head and feet on the chickens, and the beets looks like entrails. And she explains that the egg represents the baby that was inside the mother when it was slaughtered. That might be taking it a LITTLE BIT TOO FAR. She didn't have to be so literal. Maybe it's just me. Everyone is impressed with the presentation, and Charlize and Tom are both impressed with how juicy the chicken is. They also like the pickling of the beets, and the vinegary taste it adds to the dish.
Chris knows that he's been accused of being gimmicky in the past, but he doesn't think that liquid nitrogen automatically means gimmicky. Well, sure. If you're David Blaine. Actually, scratch that. He is pretty gimmicky. Chris serves poisoned apple and cherry pie. He froze an apple and used Gummi worms and rice krispies to represent worms and maggots. And then there is cherry pie inside so that when you cut it open, it looks like guts. It's actually pretty cool. When the server sets it down, Tom is so impressed. The good news is that it tastes good as well, and the ingredients combine to make great flavor. Emeril thinks it really represents Chris's point of view, and Tom is giddy at how much he loves the dish.
The judges discuss the meal overall. Tom thinks it's the best food of the season, and Eric says it's the best food he's had on the show. They realize that their decision is going to come down to nitpicking tiny glitches in various dishes. Charlize jokes that she will get the head of the losing chef on a silver platter.
Weird interstitial. The cheftestants form a band in the Stew Room with various kitchen instruments. Beverly is clapping pot lids together and she keeps going after everyone else stops because she's oblivious and also possibly drunk.
Back in the Stew Room, Grayson tells everyone the story she told about her dish, and Lindsay agrees that it was terrible. But they're all laughing at least. Padma walks in and says they'd like to see everyone, so they file out and face the Judges' Table.
Tom starts out by telling them that this is one of the best meals he's ever had on the show, and if they keep cooking like this, they will all have long careers. Well, thank God. I was starting to think this was a group of terrible cooks, you know? Except for maybe Paul. It's nice to know that they were just being hobbled by the challenge restraints and they actually do have some good dishes in them. Charlize jokes that if she were a queen, she'd take them all back to her castle and torture them and make them cook for her. I don't know how much Charlize got paid to make this Snow White movie but she has earned every penny because she has not stopped talking about the evil queen role. Ed responds, "We are here to please you." Oh, Ed, you old ass-kisser.
Emeril tells Sarah that she nailed the lamb heart. Not literally. Although that would have made a cool presentation in an homage to Neil from Real World: London. Tom liked Lindsay's tiny details that made the dish. Padma thinks Ed's sauces were amazing, with flavor and depth. Charlize thought Chris's dish had the perfect sweetness and Tom adds that he has given Chris a hard time about his tricks, but this was the challenge to use them. Emeril and Padma compliment Beverly's flavors and texture in her dish. Tom thinks Grayson's visual was dead on, and Grayson says that she takes things really literally. Obviously. Padma thought Paul's "enchanted forest" was beautiful. Paul says that he works better with an inspiration like that. So everyone had things that they did well. Who will win? Charlize says that all of the dishes were impressive, but the winner is...Paul. Huh. I really thought it was going to be Chris. They didn't talk much about the flavor of Paul's dish, but maybe it was more impressive in person. Ed, Lindsay, and Chris are also safe, so they all get to leave.
That leaves Beverly, Sarah, and Grayson as the bottom three. Padma says that it was difficult because they all did well. Tom thinks that all of them should add these dishes to their menus at home, because they were great dishes. Grayson shakes her head and laughs, so I guess she won't be serving whole black abortion chickens at home. Tom laughs too and says they might need minor adjustments.
Charlize loved Sarah's presentation, because it was rich red in color, and Sarah says that she was inspired by royalty and used over half of her budget on wine, to make sure she had the best flavors. Emeril asks if she drank any and Sarah admits that she has a little bit left in the other room in case she gets eliminated and wants to drown her sorrows. Charlize thought the risotto was a little salty. Tom thinks the risotto was a little undercooked and Sarah says that's the second time she's gotten that critique and she might have to reconsider her cooking time. Tom notes that he's really nitpicking here because there wasn't much wrong with the dish. Sarah gives a very heartfelt speech about how much she has to give to the competition and how much she loves food. I hope someone asked her a question to garner that response, because otherwise it came across as begging for her life and was weird.
Moving on to Beverly. Tom says that he enjoyed her dish and it was the same flavors she's used before, and she does them well. The only technical problem was that she used arrowroot to thicken her sauce and it became sticky. Beverly says that she didn't want her dish to be gruesome, so she went for elegant. Charlize says that the fish was cooked perfectly and the rice was amazing, but the sauce got a weird texture. Beverly says it was fine when she tasted it, and Tom says it might not have thickened up if she had served it on a hot plate. Beverly also gives the weird speech about how she's doing this for her family and she thinks she has something unique to offer. Besides crying all the time and taping weird affirmations to the mirror?
Tom thinks that Grayson's dish was "out there stuff" and Grayson laughs that she's not sure how she came up with it. Charlize says that the chicken was juicy and the skin was crispy, and she loved the beets, but the greens were a little salty. Tom thought the egg was a good inclusion, but it would have been easier to handle if hard-boiled. Padma thought the foie didn't fit into the rest of the dish, and Emeril agrees. Grayson thinks she went out on a limb and took a chance, and it fit the challenge. She adds that she could have made food that she knows she can do well, like pasta or risotto, but she tried to take a chance. She kind of threw Beverly and Sarah under the bus there, but I see her point.
The bottom three go back to the Stew Room. Grayson reports that the judges liked all of the dishes, so it's weird to be on the bottom while getting so much praise. Ed thinks they shouldn't be sad for who goes home, because they should all be proud of the meal they created. Easy to say when you're safe, Ed.
The judges discuss the verdict. Tom thought Grayson had some technical mistakes in an out-of-place egg and salty greens. Charlize loved how the plate looked, but she agrees that the greens were salty. Emeril likes how Grayson took chances, though. Charlize reminds them that Beverly didn't really take a chance, but Tom thought her dish was well-done. He agrees that it didn't look great. Emeril and Charlize hated the sticky sauce. Tom thought Sarah made some good choices, but she had flaws as well; they weren't sure if the risotto or the heart was the main attraction, and the risotto was undercooked with too much cheese. Emeril adds that there wasn't any bad food, but someone has to go home. These are the weeks that I wish Judges' Table was even longer. I know they don't want to show everything because they want to keep up the suspense of who's going home, but sometimes the decisions are baffling because we don't know what went into them. Reading Tom's blog helps sometimes, but not always.
The bottom three come back out to face the music. Tom tells Sarah that she made a great dish, but her risotto was undercooked with too much cheese. Beverly didn't really incorporate the theme to the extent that the others did and her sauce was a little sticky. Grayson incorporated the theme, but her greens were salty, and not all of her elements fit together. Tom emphasizes again that it was a difficult decision, and then turns it over to Padma to announce that Beverly is eliminated.
Beverly, and this is going to shock you, cries in her exit interview. She notes that if she hadn't forgotten one ingredient in the Quickfire, she could have had immunity. But would she want to get through on a technicality? I guess so. Beverly also thinks she has shown how strong she is, and she wants to be successful to give her son a bright future.
I won't give any spoilers on Last Chance Kitchen but I will just say that the producers stacked the deck SO HARD for one of the cheftestants that it pissed me off. It was ridiculous. Especially when all of the other challenges have been relatively straight forward. I'm still mad about it. Just go watch it. Unless you don't like to intentionally make yourself mad, I guess.