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After the earthquake, everyone's doing pretty wellâ¦except Ryan, who delays getting medical treatment for the huge piece of glass lodged in his back because he doesn't want to worry Taylor. Instead, he calls Seth over, who gets to the Roberts house via a bicycle built for one, but able to seat two. Seth and Ryan take off for the hospital without telling Taylor and Summer where they're really going, leaving Taylor and Summer to search the house for Pancakes. Meanwhile, Julie and Kaitlin are stuck in the ice cream shoppe with Gary the Ice Cream Shoppe Guy, who claims they're being washed out to sea in order to get close to Kaitlin. His plan fails when Frank shows up, but Kaitlin warms up to both Gary and Frank. Seth and Ryan have car trouble en route to the hospital, causing Seth to attempt to change a tire and then run around Newport looking for a way to get Ryan to the hospital. He resorts to a shopping cart before the Frankmobile picks him and Ryan up. Taylor shoots an intruder with a flare gun, only to find out she shot her mother in the foot. It brings them closer together. Sandy and Kirsten spend the episode first bossing Promenade people around, and then at the hospital when Kirsten says something is wrong with her baby. Despite her doctor's worried looks and tests that take an eternity to complete, she and the baby end up being fineâ¦and the baby is a girl! Everyone else ends up at the hospital eventually, be it by Frankmobile or bicycle or wagon. Ryan is fine after a blood transfusion provided by Seth, and the Cohens head homeâ¦only to find the house destroyed. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
The earthquake concludes, and Ryan and Taylor are presented with the immediate problem of how to get the cabinet off of them. Ryan hoists it up while Taylor crawls out from under him and then he slides out on the other side. They tell each other they're okay, and then Taylor apologizes for freaking out before almost freaking out again when she thinks she sees blood, saying she faints at the sight of it. Ryan, meanwhile, just looks really annoyed. I guess we can add "earthquakes" to the list of things that really piss Ryan off. He grabs his jacket and cell phone to call the Cohens while Taylor walks around talking about flashlights or whatever. Then he winces and touches his back. His pulls his hand away and there's blood all over it. Uh oh. Apparently, the camera guy faints at the sight of blood too, because we go to all these artsy shots and fades to black as Ryan lies to Taylor that he's going into the hallway to get reception. Because the first thing you should do after an earthquake while inside a structure that's not all that stable is stay in said structure and gab on the phone.
The Promenade is full of injured/shaken citizens and emergency officials. Kirsten is sitting on a bench looking depressed, while Sandy and Bookstore Lady are listening to the radio to find out what they're supposed to do. And that is to "stay calm and stay put." Sandy says that no one will leave the Promenade "unless they have to," like, who died and made you Disaster King, Sandy? Because that radio broadcast said there were no reports of fatalities yet, and I would think that all those emergency workers we've seen would be better for the job. He's such a glory hog. "What are we gonna do with everyone?" Bookstore Lady whines pathetically. Sandy says if they get organized, they won't have any problems. "Get organized?" More like get bore-ganized. Sheesh!
He heads outside to Kirsten, who's sporting a bruise/scrape on her forehead and a bad attitude. "I can't reach either of the boys," she sighs, not at all frantic like you'd think a mother would be. I'm pretty sure if I was in an earthquake and not answering the phone, my mom would be freaking out. Then again, after the first earthquake I was in after I moved to California (during which I pulled what everyone else on this show did and didn't even think to run under a doorway or anything. I stayed in bed the whole time. It's very disappointing when you find out that when push comes to shove, you freeze up and wait to die), I called my mom back home and said that she was sure to hear about the massive earthquake soon on the news and I wanted her to know I was fine. She hadn't heard anything about it on the news, but looked it up and found it listed on the United States Geological Survey site as, like, a 2.7 on the Richter scale. She laughed at me and went off to tell her co-workers about it so they could laugh at me too. She'll be sorry when the Big One really does hit and I don't call her for fear of being embarrassed.