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1-27 2004.05.05 |
The Honeymoon Is Over Caleb and Lady Heather get married, but no one really cares because they're all busy worrying about Ryan and Theresa and the love child that is definitely Theresa's but debatably Ryan's. Well, except Marissa, who is busy worrying about herself. |
| Ep. | Title | Air/Pub'l | Author |
| 1-27 Recap |
The Honeymoon Is Over The Ties That Bind - Caleb and Lady Heather get married, but no one really cares because they're all busy worrying about Ryan and Theresa and the love child that is definitely Theresa's but debatably Ryan's. Well, except Marissa, who is busy worrying about herself. |
2004.05.05 2004.05.11 |
Joanna |
| 1-26 Recap |
The EPT The Strip - Theresa takes a pregnancy test, and it's positive! For some reason, she chooses Marissa as the first person with whom she shares this information. Marissa is predictably pouty. |
2004.04.28 2004.05.03 |
Joanna |
| 1-25 Recap |
The Black-Eyed T The Shower - Eric Balfour got to be a good guy for about two seconds, until we learn that Eddie beats on Theresa. So, good guy, not so much. Also, all the Juicy Couture in the world can't hide Lady Heather's shocking past: she liked monster trucks! |
2004.04.21 2004.04.27 |
Joanna |
| 1-24 Recap |
Hammer Time The Proposal - Summer and Seth conspire to fix up Marissa's bedroom, because she's been too busy feeling bad for herself for the past eight months to do it herself. Also, Caleb proposes to Lady Heather, buys the restaurant from Jimmy and Sandy, and blackmails Marissa into living with her mom. It's a big week for Caleb! |
2004.04.14 2004.04.20 |
Joanna |
| 1-23 Recap |
She Used To Mean, Used To Be Sly The Nana - Funniest thing, saddest part was she never knew why/ Kicking her son for nothing was her favorite sport/ She had to take off, start enjoyin', 'cause life's too short!/ There's a new Nana in town, and she's feelin' good/ Got a smile, got a song for the neighborhood!/ Things are great when you're not buried six feet deep/ And The Nana's here to say -- with some chemotherapy life's gonna be -- so sweeeeeeeet! |
2004.03.31 2004.04.05 |
Joanna |
| 1-22 Recap |
Poor Colin Hanks The L.A. - Colin Hanks shows up this week as Grady, the star of the hit television show The Valley. He's not nearly as funny as he thinks he is, and he can't possibly think he's all that funny to begin with. |
2004.03.24 2004.03.30 |
Joanna |
| 1-21 Recap |
Not By The Hair Of My Chinny Chin Chinplant The Goodbye Girl - Eddie huffs and puffs and blows his way into The Big House, after he figures out that Ryan and Theresa had sex. Anna announces that she's leaving Newport, and Seth breaks her heart even more than he's already done by showing up at the airport not to win her back. Also, we learn that there's such a thing as chinplants! |
2004.03.03 2004.03.09 |
Joanna |
| 1-20 Recap |
Finding Emo The Telenovela - Seth declares his like for both emo and Summer while standing on a tabletop in the Student Union. Also this week, Theresa comes back with an eye for Ryan; unfortunately, her fianc� Eddie is eyeing Ryan too, but for entirely different reasons. |
2004.02.25 2004.03.02 |
Joanna |
| 1-19 Recap |
Bangs And Banging The Heartbreak - Marissa gets bangs, and Seth gets banged. Neither event is a particular success. |
2004.02.18 2004.02.23 |
Joanna |
| 1-18 Recap |
The Gun In The First Act Doesn't Go Off In The Third The Truth - All the gun-waving that goes on in this episode and no one gets shot? Not even Oliver? Not even a little bit? Oliver succeeds neither in keeping Marissa nor in killing himself, and is ultimately led off to a hospital after Ryan talks the gun out of his hand. Also, Seth apologizes for treating Ryan like crap, but not for treating Anna like crap. |
2004.02.11 2004.02.16 |
Joanna |
| 1-17 Recap |
Mystery Of The Letter In The Locker The Rivals - Ryan continues his impersonation of a Hardy boy, first breaking into the school, and then into Marissa's locker to get to the truth about Oliver. When he finally gets there, though, no one believes him. So, in a very un-Hardy-like display, he beats the crap out of Oliver, which probably won't help his case much with Marissa. Foiled again! |
2004.01.21 2004.01.27 |
Joanna |
| 1-16 Recap |
What Do You Do With A Drunken Sandy? The Links - After a night on the town with Jimmy Cooper, Sandy comes home drunk, spouting French nothings, the likely new co-owner of a restaurant. Meanwhile, the kids are off in Palm Springs, where Oliver takes his self-hatred out on a perfectly fine plate, then drives back to Newport to fake a drug overdose and imitate Carlton Banks. |
2004.01.14 2004.01.20 |
Joanna |
| 1-15 Recap |
Oliver Twist(ed) The Third Wheel - Oliver continues to insinuate himself into the group's good graces, although not into the good graces of the O.C. police department, who bust him for attempting to buy cocaine at a Rooney concert. Ryan comes to his aid, offering up Sandy's services. Surprisingly, Sandy does not adopt Oliver. |
2004.01.07 2004.01.12 |
Joanna |
| 1-14 Recap |
Swinging In The New Year The Countdown - Kirsten's sister Hailey arrives to provoke the Cohens into almost becoming swingers. Marissa and Ryan agree to spend the evening separately, but then Ryan scales multiple flights of stairs to kiss her at midnight so that she won't kiss Oliver, instead. Also, Seth kisses Anna, but only, apparently, because she's there. |
2003.12.17 2003.12.23 |
Joanna |
| 1-13 Recap |
Jesus And Moses Sittin' In A Tree The Best Chrismukkah Ever - Jesus and Moses work together to help Ryan realize the spirit of Chrismukkah! Also, Sandy prevails over Caleb in The Balboa Heights suit through Kirsten's ethically questionable interference; Marissa gets drunk and snippy; and Seth chooses Seth. |
2003.12.03 2003.12.09 |
Joanna |
| 1-12 Recap |
He's Here, He's Queer, Get Used To It The Secret - Newport's onto Luke's big secret this week: he wears colored contacts. And also? His dad's gay. Noopsie gossiping ensues. Meanwhile, Kirsten's attempt to bond with Lady Heather backfires in the form of a potential new neighbor: Caleb. |
2003.11.26 2003.12.04 |
Joanna |
| 1-11 Recap |
Giving Thanks For Adam Brody The Homecoming - It's Thanksgiving in Orange County this week, and Rosa's got the day off, which means everyone's eating Chinese food. But who cares about eating mu shu instead of turkey when you get to spend the holiday with Adam Brody! |
2003.11.19 2003.11.24 |
Joanna |
| 1-10 Recap |
The Lady Prevaricates The Perfect Couple - Lady Heather lies to just about everyone to ensure her smooth reentry into Newport society after the Cooper family's spectacular implosion, but her best-laid plans are shot all to hell when Marissa sabotages the Lady's carefully orchestrated charity benefit by telling everyone that her mother's boning wrinkly Caleb. Drama! |
2003.11.12 2003.11.17 |
Demian |
| 1-9 Recap |
That's Our Guy! The Heights - Seth Cohen's got girls this week (plural!) as Anna and Summer face off for his attention much to Sandy's eyebrow-popping surprise. Ryan and Marissa kiss on a ferris wheel after telling each other to kiss off in the pool house. |
2003.11.05 2003.11.10 |
Joanna |
| 1-8 Recap |
A Pirate's Life For He! The Rescue - After successfully passing a placement exam, Ryan enrolls in the prestigious Harbor School, thus joining Seth in official (mascot) piracy. Jimmy and Lady Heather continue to feud; Sandy and Rachel continue to flirt; Mischa Barton continues to flounder. Also, a non-dieting Ryan doesn't study in the nude. Blimey! |
2003.10.29 2003.11.03 |
Joanna |
| 1-7 Recap |
Once Upon a Time in Mexico The Escape - The kids head down to Tijuana, where Marissa learns of her parents' divorce and Luke's infidelities. She also learns that swallowing a handful of painkillers and chasing them with tequila makes you sweat excessively and then roll around in the dirt. |
2003.09.16 2003.09.20 |
Joanna |
| 1-6 Recap |
Summer Lovin' The Girlfriend - Seth gets a kiss from Summer, who succumbs to his charms when he recalls her love for a skinny squirrel and recites a poem about mermaids from the sixth grade. Also, Luke gets kissed by Marissa; Kirsten gets kissed by her father, Caleb; Ryan gets kissed by Caleb's girlfriend, Gabrielle; and China the Prettiest Pony gets kissed (goodbye) by Caitlyn. The only person (or animal) not getting kissed is poor, luckless Jimmy. |
2003.09.09 2003.09.14 |
Joanna |
| 1-5 Recap |
Donnie Dorko The Outsider - Ryan becomes a busboy from the wrong side of the tracks, and is befriended by fellow busboy from the wrong side of the tracks Donnie, who likes the crazy honeys and whose version of fun consists of breaking blenders and waving guns around at a party. Also, Marissa and Ryan frolic in the swimming pool and Luke gets shot. |
2003.09.02 2003.09.06 |
Joanna |
| 1-4 Recap |
Fisticuffs and Wristicuffs The Debut - For the fourth straight episode, the fists fly; this week with Ryan, Jimmy, and Sandy on the receiving end of punches. Also, Ryan wears his leather wrist cuff again. |
2003.08.26 2003.09.01 |
Joanna |
| 1-3 Recap |
Party Crasher The Gamble - Ryan's mother shows up and literally crashes Casino Night, after tossing back one or two or fifteen drinks too many and taking down a waiter. In her case, "one too many" is any at all. |
2003.08.19 2003.08.25 |
Joanna |
| 1-2 Recap |
Burnin' Down the House The Model Home - Kirsten's "model home" goes up in flames this week, as does any semblance of subtlety on the show. In order to avoid the dreaded group home, Ryan goes on the lam, aided by a sweater-clad Seth and a loofah-bearing Marissa. Once happily ensconced, Ryan surrounds himself with open flames and paint cans. No one said he was smart, but he's pretty enough. |
2003.08.12 2003.08.18 |
Joanna |
| 1-1 Recap |
The Rich Man's Russell Crowe Pilot - He wears a fine wifebeater and is no longer a resident of Chino, having been rescued from "the hood" by Sandy Cohen, thus literally becoming the rich man's Russell Crowe. In this week's episode, we meet Ryan, whose puppy-faced expressions are winning, and Seth, whose every expression is winning because he's Adam Brody, and he's our boyfriend! |
2003.08.05 2003.08.12 |
Joanna |
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