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Episode Report Card |
Stee
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168 users
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More overproduced than Michael Jackson's face, The Contender kicks off with a bone-serious hour-and-a-half-long premiere. We meet the sixteen middleweight contestants at the East L.A. "Contender Gymnasium," replete with the "finest" equipment, and a constant faux-triumphant soundtrack. We meet former celebrate Sly Stallone and also Sugar Ray (not the terrible party band, but the boxer) -- a man who has taken punches to the head his whole life, and yet whose diction is far better than professional actor Sly. We learn the rules of the show -- a fight each week, elimination, et cetera. We also learn that the fighters are splitting up into two teams, East and West, based on location. We meet manager/den mother/terrible-Meg Ryan-movie subject Jackie, and uber-craggy trainer Tommy. We see the warehouse-ish digs above the gym the fighters will be calling home. The fighters meet, measuring the competition as they watch each other warm up. We also learn snippets of personalities and stories: cowboy, ghetto kid, wee Mexican, the undefeated, the nationally-ranked, the cocky, the underdog, the broken-nosed, the family man, et cetera. The fighters make fun of Sly's films, in a early display of good taste. The two teams will take part in the first team challenge. The winning team gets to pick who fights, and who his opponent (on the other team) will be.
Challenge. Plugs for Gatorade. "Surprising" first fight choice. Press conference?! More Gatorade plugs, and others. Sierra Mist! Everlast! Toyota! Foot Locker! Access Hollywood! Long build-up to fight. 8 Mile mirror moments. Sly calls in favors to get "stars" at the fight: James Caan?! Melanie Griffith?! Chuck Norris?! The first fight. It's a really good one. All wrapping up with an emotional ending. And as we close, Stee realizes that, unlike most actors or reality show contestants, each of these men could kick his ass tenfold; therefore, this is his favorite show ever and all the men are completely un-mockable. (Not really, but it's far better than he thought.)
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