Previously on "Petty" What? Oh, Pedicabs: The teams were sent to run a bicycle rickshaw fleet, and Amy had the brilliant idea of advertising on the rickshaws, which appears to have been a bit of an overhyped brainstorm, considering that it has since been discovered that the pedicab company has been advertising on its rickshaws for some time, and says so on the website her team was reviewing in the suite at the time. Why anyone tries to slip anything past the Eagle-Eyed Forum Posters, I simply do not know, because they are equipped with magical powers that allow them to notice continuity errors of the "first his socks were up, then down, then up again" variety, and are not to be underestimated. But anyway. Katrina and Bill bickered, because she didn't understand why the fact that she used her boobies to secure every single victory up to this point would suggest to him that she might be likely to do it again. She finds the idea of a pretty girl being used as a sales tactic very insulting, you know. Katrina also assured Bill that she wasn't only successful because she's so incredibly beautiful. You know, she's not just a pointy face. Er, "pretty face" -- sorry. ["Hate." -- Sars] As for the actual task, Kwame had little success as a rickshaw driver, while Heidi pranced around acting like she flunked out of The Basil E. Nimrod School of Dimwits, and she did it right in front of Carolyn. Silly girl. Surprisingly, Protégé did not hit on the advertising idea, proving that they had managed to spend several weeks with the Trump National Donald Trump (tm Donald Trump, all rights reserved) and not yet learned that everything, everywhere, presents marketing possibilities. In the end, Protégé took a big dive and headed for the Boardroom. There, an oddly nasal version of the Hallelujah Chorus could be heard as Heidi was finally sent home to...wherever. Thus was Heidi swallowed by irrelevance, never to be remembered by anyone, which is a good thing for everyone. Oh, and if you're interested in alleged romance, Amy tried some of the creakiest flirting in the book, including the "gee, you're really a complex guy" thing that most people got over somewhere around their second semester of college when they stopped believing that drinking tea was a good way to get back at The Man.
Credits. It's nothing personal; it's just idiots.
S4. Aspiring Corporate Weasel Death Watch -- which has become a fairly intimate affair, actually. We're down to a relatively itty-bitty number of weasels. Bill asks for predictions about who will get the boot, and Amy and Nick both throw their votes to Heidi. Indeed, Troy comes in the door, and Amy calls out, "Troy? Heidi?" Kwame spots Troy coming in and grins. "T-Roy!" he calls out. He gets up and goes to greet Troy, and they exchange an enthused hand-slap/pull-back thing that they've mastered and I can't describe, except to tell you that it says this: "Fuuuuuckin' A." It may also add "dude," right at the end. Troy settles himself in a chair to tell the tale, and shares the fact that Trump rode them hard for getting their asses kicked, and Troy's response was to point out his relative merit -- to tell Trump, "Everybody sucks, and I'm the best." The rest of the Aspiring Corporate Weasels all break out laughing, and Troy raises his hands in a victory gesture. They're all going to be great at mass layoffs someday.
Time-lapse footage of traffic takes us out of the evening and into the morning. And it looks cooler than you'd think time-lapse footage would look -- they do a good job on this show of using time-lapse in a way that makes the whole city look like a big wiggling amoeba. Bill and Nick stand, wrapped in towels, as Nick shaves and Bill brushes his teeth. Hang on a minute, I'm thinking about how shallow they must think I am. Still thinking. Still thinking. Okay, I'm done. Apparently, semi-nakedness is the order of the day, because Amy is out at the kitchen, also in a towel, getting some coffee. She's been grinding the Starbucks beans, it would appear. (Ew, no, that's not a euphemism.) The phone rings, and because the world just isn't quite that friendly, Kwame is fully dressed as he goes to answer it. He gets the instructions -- from Rona, who I just figured out is a different person from Robin. Robin sits in front of the huge "TRUMP" letters, and Rona sits in front of the newspaper clipping that says "Master Of The Universe." That took me eleven episodes. I would make a terrible Eagle-Eyed Forum Poster. Anyway, the instructions tell the candidates to meet Trump in an hour downstairs in the lobby of Trump Tower. One of the regularly-appearing Tense Music Cues plays as we stare at the giant wall of water in the Trump Tower lobby and see the candidates arranging themselves in a little arc. You know, we used to stand just like that in the college a cappella group I was in, and we used to call it "the cantaloupe." So whenever I see people stand in a cantaloupe, I expect them to start singing something with a lot of "doop doop" in it. (Yeah, laugh it up. But that experience is the only reason I can sing in Bulgarian.) Once the cantaloupe is arranged, Trump walks up with Ass-Kicking Carolyn and introduces the NotGeorge of the week. It isn't Bernie, the Primary NotGeorge, but is actually Mark Brown, the Secondary NotGeorge and the guy who runs Trump's Atlantic City hotels. Secondary NotGeorge looks like he just got here from a 1976 porno movie in which he plays the cuckolded husband.
Now it's time for the teams to be evened up, lest Troy and Kwame be whittled down to nothing. Troy and Kwame are told to pick a member of VersaCorp to kidnap. Now, from their perspective, of course, they can't take Amy, because Trump complained about that last time somebody did it. And they can't take Katrina, because she's bitchy and hates Troy and that's just...well, that's a ticket on the train to Bitchyville, Population Katrina. So they're stuck with Bill or Nick, and unsurprisingly, they select Boyfriend Bill -- who looks kind of bummed, but who I think should have seen this coming. Trump asks them why they didn't choose Amy, and Troy obediently says, "Amy's got enough kudos as it is." She smiles stiffly. I don't think Amy thinks she can ever get enough kudos. Trump affirms that he approves of their choosing somebody else for once.
Trump's order of business is to crow about the incredible beauty of the wall of water, which looks like it was inspired by a very unfortunate landlord-tenant situation, but which he claims has been very favorably reviewed, architecturally speaking. He also claims that people "come from all over the world" to come to Trump Tower. I can't help but wonder if he's claiming credit for the entire New York City tourism trade, because...let's face it -- he would. Oh, he throws in a "yooge" or two in there, which is great, because I can't help but admire a guy who can continue to use his iconic expressions with no sense of shame at all. Where would Dick Vitale be today if he had stopped saying "Gimme the rock!" when it started to get annoying? Trump goes on to tell the candidates that the Trump Taj Mahal is the number one hotel in Atlantic City, and you can almost hear the asterisk after this sentence pop up with a little subliminal noise, like "[Bink!]" But anyway, as Trump explains the task, the candidates will have to "come up with a promotional idea," but based on the actual published dossier that NBC posted on its site, the task is much more specific than that. The instructions they actually receive are to set up "a game of chance or skill" for people to register for. They then will get credit for all the people who sign up for their game, and all the money those people spend gambling after that. The game will run from 10:00 AM to 10:00 PM the day. The winning team will be whichever one makes the most money in total from its registered gamblers. Losing team? Boardroom. Duh. They're all being sent by bus to Atlantic City, and he'll see them there. They certainly are exploring all available forms of transportation. No hang gliders? I shouldn't complain. I sort of love the fact that you can be working for Donald Trump and still have to take a bus, to tell you the truth. Enjoy your last days among the proletariat, y'all. Soon you will be in a swirl of fame that won't subside for at least a week and a half.
When Trump is gone, Katrina stands with Amy and Nick, looking all bitchy with her arms crossed. Katrina really only has about three expressions -- she has Bitchyface, Flirtyface, and Self-Righteousface. They're the primary colors of her personality, and everything else is some combination of them. This is about 90 percent Bitchyface, with 10 percent Self-Righteousface thrown in for extra style points. She explains that Amy is acting as PM, and Katrina thinks it's time for Amy to "prove that she deserves the attention that she's getting." Jealousy is not really flattering on Katrina, any more than it's flattering on most people. Incidentally, speaking of "not really flattering," Amy's shirt here is one of the worst I've ever seen -- she's lovely, but of all her features, her chest is not actually the best one, and this shirt is like some kind of scientifically perfected Sag Emphasizer. In fact, I think it's the Sag Emphasizer Ultra, Now With Extra Gravity. I can't think of anyone who would look good in that lumpy beige thing -- I most certainly wouldn't -- but Amy really doesn't. Katrina bitches some more that with Nick and Amy having "some kind of love affair," she just doesn't need to be anyone's friend. Not that either Nick or Amy would want to be her friend anyway, it seems to me, but there's no reason to step on her point. Except, you know, to amuse myself.
Bill isn't much happier about his new team than I am about Amy's shirt. "I'm shocked that they picked me," he grumbles, "because Troy and I do not have compatible styles, in my opinion. In fact, uh, we're exact opposites. Frankly, I'm not exactly fond of the way he does business." Oh, relax, Boyfriend Bill. You might learn a few expressions that will be really helpful if you're ever trying to pick up chicks at a rodeo. The candidates all pile into the bus, which certainly leaves them lots of room. As they're getting ready to leave, Kwame suggests to Troy and Bill that they all brainstorm for fifteen or twenty minutes, and then they'll talk about some ideas. Kwame interviews that his management style is to hook up with great people and not get in their way too much. He claims that his leadership style works well with people like Bill and Troy, because they both work independently once you give them an idea of what the task is. He claims that this is why they selected Bill in the first place. As stated previously, I think they picked Bill because every other choice was even worse, but...there you have it. If Kwame wants to say "our management styles mesh" instead of "I'd rather be boiled like a lobster than work with Katrina," that's up to him. I won't tell.
On the bus, Protégé is working the phones, setting up meetings and chatting about different ideas. Troy, in an interview that looks like it's being conducted in a dingy field somewhere while he's being held as a political prisoner by a group of separatist raccoons ("We will have our own government and our own trashcans from which to eat!"), explains that they worked the whole way down to Atlantic City. And to their surprise, when they looked up in front of the bus, Amy, Nick, and Katrina were all sleeping. The ironic sound guy uses little "clickety-zoing!" noises to indicate that VersaCorp is just snoozing like a bunch of bums. Troy marvels at how nonchalant they all are, considering that it's down to six people.
The bus drives under an Atlantic City sign, and as we see the Trump Taj Mahal, the music turns hysterically (and I have to think intentionally hysterically) regal and trumpety. It reminds me a little of the very end of The Muppet Movie, just before the set collapses in a grand display of hubris directed against the perpetrators of phoniness. Parallels? Oh, I think so. When they get inside the Taj Mahal, Secondary NotGeorge greets them. Apparently, they took the bus, but Secondary NotGeorge got out ahead of them by being jet-propelled or sent in the Trump Hydraulic Slingshot. (Which didn't muss his hair, of course.) Troy hasn't spent enough time in casinos, I think, because as they walk through, he marvels at how "amazing" the Taj is. Poor Troy. He's a sucker for big candlepower. Secondary NotGeorge explains that "what the customer always wants is to have a great time." Well, sure, except for those people who write on their comment cards, "time, LESS FUN!!!!" Bill asks Secondary NotGeorge about how many "gaming positions" the place has, and it begins to appear that perhaps Bill, for whatever reason, speaks casino. Bill interviews that the game was, to his eye, not going to be won or lost on volume, but on the kind of player you register -- in other words, you've got to sign up the people who are going to be spending a lot of money.
Random casino shots. We find ourselves in the VersaCorp hotel suite, where Amy is saying that they need some kind of great spectacle. Katrina suggests belly dancers. Well, sure. That would be a draw. Because you can't hit scantily-dressed chicks in Atlantic City, unless you're willing to, I don't know, swing your arms. Katrina also suggests a tiger, followed by a car. (Well, she suggests a tiger and then she suggests a car -- a tiger being followed by a car would be kind of anticlimactic, no matter how much engine-revving you threw in.) She claims that when she sees a car, she always walks toward it. She claims this has something to do with curiosity, but I suspect it's because cars are shiny. Katrina interviews that Amy was not interested in her ideas. Amy -- Amy, people -- says that they could pay for "a weekend car rental" of a "luxury vehicle of choice." Katrina unexcitedly refers to this in an interview as "Amy's plan." She goes on to snot that "Amy needs to be held responsible" if the rental plan doesn't work.
Troy interviews that he felt the game had to be "something that attracts attention." He talks about meeting with the casino carpenter (something the dossier says they're entitled to do), and asking him about the grandest thing he'd ever built. The carpenter cites a wheel, and Troy says that he figured that somewhere, there had to be a wheel lying around that they could refurbish. Sure enough, they find one. Troy calls it "the wheel of [his] dreams." Yes, but a guy can't marry a wheel, because what would come ? Polygamy? Troy claims that the rest of his team "will be very happy" with him for finding the wheel. I'm not sure Bill is in a "be very happy" kind of place on this task, so I hope Troy doesn't have his hopes too terribly high. Maybe his team "will scowl less."
Meanwhile, Katrina and Amy meet with Bob, a guy who's got himself a car lot. Katrina claims that in her earlier discussions with Bob, he promised to give her whatever they needed. When the conversation starts, Katrina says that they were hoping he would give them a free Crossfire -- just give it to them outright. That does not seem likely, I have to say. Katrina does her baby-voice thing as usual, making these obnoxious cutesy faces and trying to be all flirty, which is not working on this particular car guy at all. One would almost suspect that Katrina is not the first woman to ever try to wheedle something out of this particular guy in this particular way, and that he's seen enough women of her type in his time to be reasonably immune to it. Not surprising, since he would have gone broke twenty-six seconds after opening his dealership if that were not the case. As the negotiation stalls, Amy complains that Katrina "has a tendency to use sexuality as her prime negotiating tactic" (way to pay attention, there, Amy) in tasks. Amy says that when it didn't work with this guy, all Katrina did was crank it up, which Amy felt also wasn't working. "You know what?" Amy interviews. "Turn off the sexual bullshit and let's talk business." Eh. I agree in theory, but I'm not sure I think Amy has much credibility on that point. Her cutesy-ass way of trying to play the little push-pull game with Nick isn't doing anything for me either, empowerment-wise, so I'm not sure either one of them is going home with the Seneca Falls souvenir t-shirt. But despite the fact that Katrina has been talking and talking to this guy for some time now, when Amy takes a shot, Katrina whines in an interview that Amy wouldn't let her be the lead on the negotiation. Amy manages to wrap up the deal with Bob by offering him something of value -- rather than by cocking her head and giggling -- and Katrina looks mightily put out about it. ["Hate!" -- Sars] Yeah, poor Katrina, upstaged by someone who speaks in complete sentences, none of which include the word "Pleeeeeeeeease." How appalling.
Video poker! Games! And then, it's time for the bit about the Fercos Brothers. As it happens, the Trump Taj Mahal has a show that looks very Siegfried-and-Roy, complete with tigers. Troy and Kwame go to visit the executive producer of the act, who is ten years old. I don't entirely understand this, but we'll go with it as it's presented. Troy chats with the kid a little about how he's "gone straight to the top," and the kid's all, "What do you want? I have things to do." Troy asks the kid -- who is named Fitz -- whether they can "co-market" with him. They'll promote the show, and he'll give them some stuff to enhance their game. Fitz offers them "some of the dancers in costume." Hee. Troy interviews about how weird it was to be negotiating with a ten-year-old. The kid agrees to let them use the lions and tigers from the show, and Troy -- always bubbling over with enthusiasm -- talks some more about what a great partnership it's going to be. "Let me give you advice in life," Fitz tells Troy. "Don't sell when it's already sold." Kwame makes a face like, "Oh, man, you just got schooled by Fitz. And Fitz is too young for pimples." Amusingly, I found an article about Fitz that states that Fitz learned the "don't sell when it's already sold" line from...Donald Trump, who said it to Fitz when Fitz was trying to convince him to bring the show to the Taj. So Fitz is actually somewhat famous for being told this same thing by Trump, which explains why he hauled it out here and used it on Troy.
Troy returns to the room and talks to Bill and Kwame about the fact that one of Fitz's conditions was that Troy had to come to the show. In the suite, Kwame says he wants to go to the show with Troy, and asks Bill if he's all right solo. Bill says he is. In an interview, Bill indicates some doubts about Troy and Kwame going to the show, but says that Kwame is the team leader and Bill "[doesn't] want to step on him too much." Kwame interviews that there was really no reason for him to go to the show -- "I actually just wanted to go along with Troy." And there's nothing wrong with that either, although I also agree with Boyfriend Bill that time was very short, and I'm not sure it's the call I would have made. If nothing else, it stands to make you look bad if the task goes badly and Trump winds up feeling like you could have done more to prepare. But at any rate, Troy and Kwame take in the magic show and the tigers and such. Troy calls the show "absolutely incredible." And also creepy, especially when you see the tiger get all up on one of the Fercos brothers. I'm not sure casinos and tigers and peril would be where I'd go for synthetic excitement at this point in history. Bill comments again that he doesn't think Troy and Kwame both needed to go when there's a lot of work to be done. Bill needs to learn the lesson that if you want to go to the party, you have to go to the party, and if you decide to stay home and wash your hair, you have to wash it with a smile on your face.
Amy, Nick, and Katrina let themselves into their suite. Amy gets all fluttery staring at Nick and smiling, and Katrina gets all catty asking them if they're going to share a bed, and whatever. Amy asks Nick if she makes him nervous, in a sort of "tell me I do" kind of way, and then we watch her interview -- totally ridiculously -- that Nick has a "crush" on her, and she hasn't really decided what she thinks. I have to wonder who Amy thinks she's fooling. It's certainly not anyone who has ever seen the show while conscious. She's been the one trying to crank up the mysterious vibes of love the entire time, as far as I can see. All Nick's ever done is pretty much sit there and let her act stupid, and he knows exactly what she wants him to say -- for instance, when she asks if she makes him nervous, he knows enough to say yes, even though I don't really think it's true. Incidentally, aside from Katrina's stupid comments, there's nothing to indicate that anyone shared a bed on this particular night, let alone had any sex, so...if you want to imagine it, you can, but you certainly can't get that from what's shown. As with most reality show flirting, it's a whole lot of talking and not a whole lot of showing.
We return to a title card saying, "It's Easier to Think Big," and for some reason I can only assume is contractual, we are forced to sit through a pitch by Trump for a new golf course he's building somewhere in New Jersey. Like I care. The only reason this footage is any fun at all is that it's very windy, and he does comment that the way the wind is whipping his hair, at least it will be obvious that it's not a toupee. I will say this, though -- the wind may reveal that that's his real hair, but it also reveals just how far back on his head that real hair actually begins when it's not all fluffy. And how far back is it? Pretty far. The fluffery ain't for nothing, y'all.
Katrina explains the task in a little more detail, including the fact that when they get a person registered for their game, the person then gets a card that's swiped when they play in the casino, so you know how much money they've spent. Bill explains that his team's game is that you spin the wheel for a chance to be entered in a drawing for a $1,000 giveaway. Troy says that at 10:00 AM, they already had a line "lit'rally" out the door for their game. Pretty good. We watch as they open the game and a guy pulls off a winning spin and drops his ticket in the drum for the drawing. Meanwhile, Katrina repeats that her team is raffling off a car rental valued at $300. Wow, that's quite an impressive snore. Amy explains that her team thought they needed "manpower" to "recruit people" to come play their game. So since they needed manpower, they got pretty models. As you do. Amy even harasses one guy herself, opening with a spiel about how they're doing a "Crossfire giveaway," and telling him only after he's started talking to her that all you get is a weekend car rental. Cheap. So very, very cheap and lame. I hate this kind of bait-and-switch. It's right up there with those official-looking mailings that are designed to make me think I'll be arrested if I don't open them, when in fact they're just trying to sell me life insurance. Over at VersaCorp, Kwame asks Bill if Protégé is giving away the car, and Bill tells him no, they're just giving away a rental. The guys both think this is a pretty stupid idea. "Aw, hell no," Kwame says with a smile. Heh. One guy walks away from the VersaCorp model while she's trying to entice him, and she does not look happy at all. No one walks away from Princess!
Boyfriend Bill takes up his position at the VIP registration desk, where he has arranged for access to the VIPs. This, he explains, gives you a shot at signing up the guys who spend more money in the casino. He explains that he had "secured exclusive rights" to do this ahead of time -- to work that particular counter. He also has a dancer from the Fercos Brothers show (I believe) who escorts people from the counter over to the line where they can sign up. Boyfriend Bill opines that the VIP line is going to be the "make or break scenario." Amy sees what Bill is doing, and she sends one of her girls over there to jump all over the same VIPs. Amy admits in an interview that she was poaching the other team's "great idea," which she hadn't thought of. Bill, who you'll remember said before that he had arranged for exclusive access to the VIPs, is not thrilled that the VIPs who are approaching are now going to be accosted by two people at the same time, and he gripes to the girls behind the desk that "it's like a used car lot. Someone walks on the lot and they get attacked by the vultures." He gets together with Kwame and, very frustrated, grumps that "the other team obviously can't come up with an original idea, so they've got their hookers over here working my customers." Ah, yes, Bill's frustrated and he's venting, which doesn't really bother me, but I do think he's destined to be frustrated if he gets this vent-y every time somebody acts kind of tacky and low. It is a Burnett show, after all. Once Bill is fully vented, he and Kwame shake hands, and Kwame says he understands why Bill doesn't want to leave right now. It appears that Kwame was asking Bill to go do something, and Bill was explaining that he wanted to stay, because he was pissed off that his VIPs -- to whom he had negotiated access ahead of time -- were getting poached by models working for VersaCorp, which, as he said, didn't seem to have a single decent idea this entire episode.
Bill then talks to the girl Amy sent over, as well as another woman who I think is maybe a manager, and he complains that for the guys in line to be jumped on by two people looks really chintzy, which I agree with, although God knows it's not like chintzy is going to stand out in this setting. He also tells the girl that she can go anywhere else in the casino, but she ought to leave him fifty feet around the line where he arranged to have access. (I don't think he literally means he's getting out a ruler; I think he just means she can't linger around the counter the way she was.) It's not as much that I dislike Bill in this particular scene as it is that I think he's not really getting the vibe of the game -- he's always been somewhat like this, wanting the game to really resemble business as business would be conducted, and that's just not going to happen. And when he gets frustrated, he acts kind of morally outraged, which...you just have to get over if you're going to do a show like this. Because even though I think he's a good guy, he comes off like he's shaking the tiny fist and such, and that just doesn't make you look good.
In keeping with this episode theme of Amy's team trying to poach from Kwame's team, Katrina sends one of her chicks over to try to grab people out of the line waiting for Protégé's game. Again, that's just cheap. I mean, is it rule-breaking? No. But cheap? Yes. Does it indicate that you don't have a lot of ideas of your own? Yes, that too. When the girl gets over there and tries to take people out of the line, Troy steps right over and walks her away from them. He just keeps up a constant jabber of "sure do appreciate it" and "we'll just have you step right over here" and "pretty as a peach," and although she protests, there's really nothing she can do, because Troy just keeps up a constant patter until she doesn't have any choice but to scoot. Bill interviews that the attempt to poach people they've already hooked is "completely inappropriate," which...again, not rule-breaking. Just tacky, especially when you do it multiple times in the same task. And again, Bill is just wanting people to be a lot more knights-of-the-round-table about all of this than they're ever going to be. He needs a drink. But at any rate, as if two poachings isn't enough, Amy notices that Troy has arranged to have a microphone to promote his game, and so she goes off and tries to get a microphone for herself. Because this is the episode of Oh Me Too, Me Too, Only I Have A Rental Car! Not only is Amy still keeping up the poach, but she denies she's even "taking a hint" from the other team. And denying it is even tackier than doing it in the first place. As to the substance of her plan as opposed to its originality (or lack thereof), rather than set up a line that people can come over to when they take a break, Amy gets her microphone and shouts into the casino for people to leave the slot machines -- where they're spending money -- and come and ogle the car which...they don't have a chance to win. In a side conversation, Carolyn says to Secondary NotGeorge that it's kind of counterproductive for Amy to be pulling people off the casino floor. "And she's screaming into the casino," Secondary NotGeorge adds in a tight, unhappy voice. "Great."
Music that does not at all infringe on the copyright held by the owners of "Dueling Banjos" plays as we flip back and forth between Troy on the mic and Amy on the mic. At times, they seem to be talking at the same time, which is...really not good. Katrina says that she doesn't think the screaming was so helpful, and they're "missing something." And what specifically does she think they're missing? "Shock value."
Right on cue, doors onto the casino floor open, and a cage holding a white tiger is wheeled out. Everyone in the casino turns to watch, including Nick and Katrina, both of whom look a bit chagrined at this spectacle that is not their own. Nick finds himself with the microphone in his hand as the tiger is wheeled into the vicinity, and he says, "Please direct your attention to the 2003..." His voice trails off. "Well, I can't really beat a tiger," he says, and flips off the mic. Hee. Kwame interviews that "the tiger was fuckin' phenomenal." He compares bringing out the tiger to the psychological lift you get from dunking on the other team in basketball. He also calls it "a very Donald Trump thing to do," which I agree with. Only Trump would have had his name shaved into the tiger's fur. Bill, still in glass-half-empty mode, notes that although the tiger caused a lot of excitement, it also took people away from gambling. He's right, but it would rob from the teams equally, so I'm not sure it really hurts Protégé competitively.
Meanwhile, we get the obligatory "not so fast!" segment in which we are told that things are beginning to go better for Amy's team. They're signing people up, doing much better -- Nick claims that they're running on all cylinders now. Amy bitches about how bad the strategy was of bringing in the tiger. As opposed, I suppose, to all of her wonderful ideas, of which there have been...oh, right. None. "It's guerrilla marketing at its best," Nick says of his team's efforts, "and I think we're gonna win."
After the commercial, we return for the portion of the episode that was apparently directed by David Lean. The music swells grandly. "Dum dum dum dah!" it proclaims. The Trumpicopter lands near the Taj Mahal, and to the blare of trumpets, Trump emerges. He is seen -- complete with pink tie -- descending the giant escalator in the middle of the casino. They shoot him from below in order to make him look huge. Oh, sorry -- "yooge." Fascinated people in the casino stare. He works a row of people sitting at the tables, just shaking their hands without even looking at them, really. Somehow, having Trump sort of diss you is almost more of an honor than having him pretend to like you, because if he respects you enough to admit he doesn't give a crap about you, you're really getting somewhere. Kwame is in the middle of greeting a woman when Trump arrives, and Kwame turns and comfortably announces him. Trump brings Troy and Bill over, and he reminds everyone that the drawing will be at 10:00 to win the money. Trump approaches Amy, who bubbles over with excitement -- as usual. He tells her that he's heard that the other team is doing well, and she makes a disparaging remark about the tigers. Trump high-fives her and leaves. I kind of started really hating Amy somewhere around this point. She's just so full of herself. I've never seen anything really resembling a sense of humor or self-awareness...she's not as offensive as some of the other idiot women, but she's certainly not scoring any points with me.
And now, it is time to pull the winners of both drawings. Kwame spins the drum and pulls out the winning number for the $1,000 prize. She's there, and she looks very happy. A guy whose number is not picked does not look happy. Nick pulls the winner of the $300 giveaway (yippee), and that person is not present. How exciting. After all of this, it is time to retire to the blackjack area to announce who won the task.
There's a great shot of Trump strolling through the casino with Carolyn and Secondary NotGeorge alongside him -- they're both holding briefcases and he's not, and they're all walking in this very purposeful way. It's sort of awesome. ["It looked, to me, exactly like Lyman Zerga's entrance into the casino from Soderbergh's Ocean's Eleven. Which would make Carolyn Casey Affleck. Snick!" -- Sars] They meet up with the teams, who are cantalouped again. Carolyn first announces the numbers for VersaCorp. They got 1,337 people signed up, for a total take of $105,362. Protégé, on the other hand, signed up 776 people. Bill looks shocked at this gap in numbers. Katrina smiles smugly. ["HATE!" -- Sars]
But not for long. Secondary NotGeorge explains that while Protégé had fewer gamblers, they had a substantially higher per-person average, for a total of $123,159. My guess is that spinning the wheel frankly took a lot longer than writing your name down for the stupid car giveaway, and that accounts for the difference in getting people signed up. They had a huge line, and some people just aren't going to stand in line for that long. Moreover, it's hard to know whether people did get poached from their line. But here's an interesting point: VersaCorp's patrons only spent an average of a little under $80 a person. Protégé's spent almost twice that much on average, but I'm almost certain it didn't break down anything like that. They probably signed up mostly people who spent the same $80 or so (since the crowd off the floor was the same people) and then had the VIPs who spent several thousand dollars. That's my guess. It really does almost have to be the VIPs who were the difference, just as Secondary NotGeorge said, because there's no other reason that the average per-person number for Kwame's team would be twice the number of Amy's team. "Amy, you finally lost," Trump says to her, as Amy sets her jaw unhappily. "And you guys finally won one!" he says to Kwame and Troy. Kwame and Troy congratulate each other, and Boyfriend Bill extends his hand to Troy as well.
The reward for this particular victory is that the boys get to spend the night in the most beautiful suite in the Taj Mahal, and they'll get $1,000 each for gambling. They all grin from ear to ear. I think this beats a picnic, just by a little bit. Oh, and VersaCorp? You're going to the Boardroom. Hee.
Bill, Troy, and Kwame leave the meeting exuberant. Bill declares his intention to stay out all night, and he and Kwame share a chest-bump. They head upstairs to the penthouse, and when they get there, it is much more attractive than the Trumpartment. It makes Kwame swear a lot, culminating in his declaration that "this is some pimped out, rap video...shit." Or at least I think it's "shit." He gets bleeped. Either way, it really made me laugh. Kwame is really kinda funny, just in a much more low-key way than, say, Troy. "You can just call me the motherfuckin' PM," Kwame says as Bill hands him his thousand gambling bucks. Boyfriend Bill laughs. Bill takes over behind the bar, and asks, "You want a man drink, McClain, or you want a girl drink?" Hee. I was asked precisely that question at a party last night. Without the "McClain," obviously. "Man me up," Troy says, and Bill pours. After asking for a man drink, Troy actually finds the man drink a little bit strong, it would appear, judging by the swearing that follows. Troy now interviews that the three of them had been working all day, and delighted in the opportunity to take some time to relax. They head down to the casino, where they discuss how much they're enjoying the victory. Troy also says that they were able to get rid of all the crap and "cat fighting" and have a great time together. At what I believe is a blackjack table, Troy grandly tells the dealer that Bill is used to the big casino life, but Troy is only a simple country boy. Bill rubs his eyes and laughs, and he finally turns to Troy and gives him the hand-clasp, laughing, "Cut that bullshit, all right, dude?" They laugh. In an interview, Bill says that he does think he and Troy are really different, but it's all "water under the bridge," because they worked well together and it's all cool. Bill encourages Troy and Kwame to bet big, and somebody wins, and Bill says "booyah," which is when you can tell that his biggest problem is that he's kind of a dork. Yay!
Back at S4, VersaCorp is waking up for their day of preparation for the Boardroom. Troy, Kwame, and Bill are just getting home. Amy is sitting at the computer with a towel on her head, tippy-tapping away at a Boardroom defense. You can see that what she's writing down is that she stands by what they decided, and that their idea was better than pulling people off the floor to watch tigers. So rather than talk about what she would do differently time, she wants to argue about why her idea was still better, which...seems stupid to me. That may be a good example of her lack of experience in the Boardroom and how it might not pay off. She interviews that she has "a lot of nervous energy" as she heads for her first visit to the Boardroom. She says that if she's asked about responsibility for the loss, she will indeed take a fair amount of it herself as PM. She and Nick sit at the kitchen table with a giant stack of cash in front of them (huh?), and she tapes things to a sheet of paper. Is she making a chart or something? Will there be a diorama? Can I get her some popsicle sticks? Nick opines in an interview that Amy is actually at a disadvantage compared to the rest of them, because she's never been to the Boardroom before. He says it's hard to know how she's going to respond to being on Trump's hot seat. She singsongs to Nick as they wait that she's "nerrr-vous." I believe this is the debut of the skirt she will be wearing in the Boardroom, which is extremely short, even for the women on this show. Seriously. The thing looks like a headband.
Elsewhere, Katrina is wearing a preppy sherbet-green sweater and voicing over that she may go tonight because of Amy and Nick's relationship. Of course, she doesn't allow for the possibility that she might go because she isn't that good and because Trump has already made it clear that he can't stand her, but why suddenly start getting all rational now? Troy wishes VersaCorp luck as they head for the Boardroom.
Katrina, Nick, and Amy get off the elevator. Katrina and Amy are both working the tiny skirts for all they're worth, that's for sure. Trump enters. "So Amy, how does it feel to finally be on a losing team?" he asks. She calls it "tough." Amy tells Trump that she thinks the team ultimately lost to Bill's VIP strategy. Nick points out that not only had Bill had the idea, but he had negotiated ahead of time that it would be an exclusive deal. "Pretty good, right?" Trump asks. "Oh, it was a great idea," Nick says easily. Trump asks about Amy's feelings about Bill, and she calls him "a great player." Trump asks if he's better than Amy. "I think Bill's my toughest competition," she says. Nick makes a face. Ow. That seemed like an unnecessary grinding of her heel. Trump asks Nick whether he agrees that Bill is that good. "He's good," Nick says noncommittally. Trump asks Amy why she was trying to get the people in the casino to leave, and asks what that was all about. I have a feeling that something went on that we didn't see, because Amy and Trump both seem to be acknowledging that while she was on the microphone, she did something or offered something that took the folks on the floor off the floor, at least part of the time -- I get the feeling it was something other than the rental car, though I could be wrong. I'm not sure that trying to decipher discussions between Trump and Amy will do anything but make me depressed about all the things I don't know.
Asked for her opinion, Carolyn says that she thinks the team's performance had some clear flaws. She says that she doesn't think the $300 value car rental in that setting was a good draw. Trump openly mocks the idea of giving away a rental rather than giving away the car. Secondary NotGeorge offers his opinion that the car with the balloons on it was just generally a boring, dumb idea. Nothing like what was going on with Protégé and the fun time folks had with the wheel and the laughing and the tiger and stuff. Katrina, not wanting to be deprived credit for her great ideas, says that she wanted to have belly dancers and a circus theme. Trump says that Atlantic City has plenty of spectacle -- what they needed was a car. "Who chose this stupid concept?" he asks. No one says anything. "Was it Nick?" he asks. "Was it you? Was it you?" "I came up with the car, I didn't come up with the idea --" "So it's Nick or Amy," Carolyn says impatiently. Amy innocently insists that she has no idea whose idea it was (it was hers). "I'm not really sure," she says. (It was hers.) ["It is not a secret that I do not like Katrina, but if I were Trump, that blandly smug 'I'm not really sure' would probably have gotten Amy thumped instead. Like hell you're not, blondie." -- Sars] Trump insists that had they managed to get a car to give away, the outcome would have been completely different. "I think your concept was terrible," he says.
Now it's time for Amy to pick someone to go up to the suite and someone to stay with her. She chooses Nick to go up, meaning Katrina gets to stay. Nick smiles. Katrina smirks. Nick takes off, and Amy and Katrina go off to sit in the lobby and wait. It's interesting to watch the two women sitting on the yellow couch, trying to find a way that they can sit without showing everything under their skirts.
Trump chats with Carolyn and Secondary NotGeorge. Secondary NotGeorge says that he thinks no one did a particularly good job, but Katrina seemed especially uninterested in what was going on, and didn't seem to even be trying to contribute. Carolyn agrees, but adds that although Amy has done well in past tasks, she "made large mistakes" in this one. Trump brings the women back in. Carolyn starts by asking Amy what Nick did better than Katrina. Amy says that they were equal in this particular task, but over time, she thinks Nick has been the better candidate. Katrina insists that Nick isn't any better than she is. She complains that she's been "underestimated" and she hasn't been "given the opportunity" to be a good leader. She complains about the negotiation at the car dealership, claiming that Amy cut her off when she was trying to negotiate. Amy says that she doesn't understand that, because she thinks that Katrina was the one who ultimately did negotiate the deal. Amy says that Katrina "used some charm" and got the deal done. Katrina jumps in to bitch, because God forbid anyone should think that's how she functions, but Trump stops her to ask her whether she does, in fact, believe in "using womanly charm." Womanly charm? Oh, and me without my petticoats. She says that she "most definitely" does, and Amy says that she does, too, "absolutely." Trump asks whether they think that's unfair to the men, and Amy counters that every man who's left in the suite has used charm at some point or another. Uh...yeah, I can't really argue, I guess.
Trump changes the subject, asking Katrina whether she's surprised that she was picked. She says, all smirky, that she wasn't at all. And why? "Because of a personal relationship that Amy and Nick have, I thought I would be chosen." "What does 'personal' mean?" Trump asks. "You mean...they like each other?" Katrina nods. "I'm surprised at you, Amy," Trump asks, giving her a little bit of a hard time. "I don't make a decision on personal relationships," Amy says, starting to sweat openly. She insists that she made the decision only based on who's better. "Let me put it this way," Katrina says, "I think that Nick and Amy both play each other." Trump asks Amy whether that's true, and she looks up at the ceiling with a little smile, thinking how adorable she's going to look making this face on television, and she says it might be true. He asks her whether she'd be disappointed if that were the case, and she gets all, "Oh, of course not!" when, in fact, she would be very upset to think that Nick was playing her, because she has it in her mind that it is the opposite. Asked whether she would be disappointed if Nick were just playing her, she insists, "I think Nick has a crush on me." Trump asks whether her relationship with Nick was the reason why Nick went up and Katrina stayed, and Amy insists that it wasn't. Amy says that of course, they all have personal friendships, because they live together, but she maintains that that doesn't make the decision for her.
Trump points out that after this firing, there will be one woman and four men left in the suite. "So they've staged a pretty good comeback," he says of the men who remain. "And you didn't help things by choosing a woman," Trump says. "You could have chosen your boyfriend." There is a pause, and Amy, in a full flop sweat, says that Nick isn't her boyfriend. Oh, sorry -- he's not her boyfriend "whatsoever." HA! She repeats that she thinks Nick is a better candidate than Katrina. Carolyn asks her, if that's true, why Amy would keep someone who's better competition down the line. Amy says that her focus is on "aligning [her]self with the strongest team members until the end." "And then you destroy them," Trump puts in. "Absolutely," she answers in a way that's very unconvincing. She strikes me as one of those women who doesn't have a shred of actual tough in her, but acts tough because she thinks tough is cute, which I find revolting.
Trump asks Katrina to remind him how many times her team has lost. She says only twice (before now), and Trump points out that, compared to Amy, that's a lot. Amy insists that "four times," she has "led teams to success." I'm not sure how she's doing that math, but...okay. Trump says that his problem is that he thinks they were equally poor at this particular task. But Amy, in the past, has been excellent. And Katrina, in the past, has been...Ereka's friend. Moreover, both teams have picked her to go back and forth when they were given the opportunity. "And therefore, Katrina, I have to say...you're fired." God, FINALLY. ["HA-- oh, wait. Yay!" -- Sars] That took a really long time after the moment when she became irreversibly doomed. Amy smiles a neat, cold, greasy little smile that I didn't care for at all. As they leave, Trump says that he thinks Katrina "just wasn't as outstanding" as Amy, and thus, she had to go. She goes out and gets into her cab. Amy heads for the door of S4.
In her exit cab interview, Katrina remains absolutely obsessed with Amy and her relationships with the men, talking about how Amy does too have a thing with Nick, does too, does too! She goes on to advise the men that Amy will try to play all of them. So very tiresome, the jealousy. Find a new gig, Katrina.
week: High-priced real estate. Amy and Nick. "America's favorite couple." Bleh.