Episode Report Card M. Giant: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Hell in High Water
By M. Giant | Season 15 | Episode 5 | Aired on 10.25.2009
"Not traditional rowing, but I'm here," Gary says as the yacht attendants pull him in by his oar. After getting his watch, he gets back in and heads back the same way. Anybody who rows like that shouldn't get a Rolex but something out of a cereal box.
"Please, Jesus, let us leave Dubai," Tiffany says before ripping the clue at 11:47. Seems to me that will definitely happen, one way or another. I think Tiffany says they have $144 dollars for the leg, and in their taxi, she likes the James Bond aspect of their task. "We have a briefcase we have to take to some location," she says excitedly, stretching the analogy to its limits. Well at least now we know she can bluff. "Although I don't think that I've ever seen James Bond sweat," she adds, revealing exactly how much she knows about James Bond..
Finally, Mika and Canaan are off, unsurprisingly in last place, at 11:54. Almost four hours behind Meghan and Cheyne, in other words. Good luck catching up. In an interview, Mika confesses, "Canaan is a little more competitive than me. I've never played team sports, I've ever really ran in my whole life, so Canaan has to push me along a lot." I apologize for comparing her to Adrian Monk last week. At least Monk did track in high school. In their taxi, she adds, "We've got a lot of practice being in the back trying to move forward." Yes, but practice implies you're getting better at it.
Gary gets his and Matt's case open, so they're still in third place when they leave the marina. "Can you see ol' Big Easy riding in that raft?" Gary asks in their cab. "No, he'd sink it," Matt says. Whereas Matt has the grace and physique of a ballerina.
The Globetrotters have at last arrived in the right place, still in fourth. Big Easy straps on his lifejacket doubtfully, wondering if they made the right decision. I'll save him some time: No. Big Easy does not in fact sink his dinghy when he gets in, but he's as inept at navigating it as Gary was. Flight Time has to call out not only encouragement, but instructions for turning by using one paddle at a time. Big Easy says he doesn't have experience with this, because in case you haven't heard, he's from the projects in New Orleans. "You got the Mississippi River but it's dirty so you can't go in there." But sometimes it comes to you. Watching from the veranda, Flight Time mutters, "I should have did this one." Big Easy is living up to his name, because in comparison to himself, he is making his dinghy look very small and very difficult.
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