I'm Sick Of Doing Stuff I Can't Do

I'm glad they came here, actually. I think for a relatively nearby country, it's less well-known than some. Americans have the whole thing like, 'Um...there's a canal...and hats, I think...and doesn't Van Halen live there?'

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli
B-

287 users
B-

Previously on Wow, Where Did We Put The Passports All That Time Ago?: The race finally left the country, heading for Panama, where boat drivers mean everything and skill means nothing. Oh, and the native birds are all made of wood, SHUT UP. The Paolos edged the Gaghans for a bungee-jumping Fast Forward, but Papa Bill beat out Sharon Swing-and-a-miss-ski at the baseball Roadblock, so it was the Godlewskis finishing last. They were not Philiminated, however, and lived to screech in unison another day. They also managed to run out CBS's entire annual allotment of on-screen women's underwear in one shot, resulting in a stern letter from Standards and Practices entitled "Gratuitous Panties: URGENT Please Review," in which the words "Leave some for Jennifer Love Hewitt!" were used. In other news, Mama Weaver snarled at the brothers Linz for peppering Rolly with "batta batta batta" while he was trying to hit, and continued to show all the warmth of January in International Falls. This week, the pinks will start out with no money whatsoever and no way to make money other than by opening a black-market lingerie and mosquito-proof hat boutique. (I'm just saying: They clearly produced a mosquito-proof hat. They brought it, not me.) Who will be Philiminated...next?

Credits. You know, I normally would never bring this up, and God knows I've had enough unflattering pictures of me taken to last a lifetime. But if I were going to, say, take out other teams' pictures and mock the appearance of faces and boobs and whatnot out loud on camera while, say, standing at the Yield? I would make sure that in the credits and anywhere else on the show and in my precisely parallel still photos, the portrayal of my tummy was extremely flattering and did not at all make it look like I was slouching in a manner that made me look pregnant. It's one of those where if you don't bring it up, I certainly won't, but when you open the door, it's hard not to walk through it. [BOMP.]

Commercials. It occurs to me that I don't show adequate conviction in the apparently critical battle against dust. But then...you're talking to a person who recently managed to drop her phone in a dish of salsa, so if neatness really does count, I already am in some serious hurt.

Fairly severe music returns us to Panama, where people appear to be rather busy at the moment. Phil tells us that the Panama Canal is a "marvel of engineering," and that it connects the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans. Which, I hope, you know already. I'm glad they came here, actually. I think for a relatively nearby country, it's less well-known than some. Americans have the whole thing like, "Um...there's a canal...and hats, I think...and doesn't Van Halen live there?" On the Pacific side, we find the Miraflores Locks, which served as the fifth pit stop. We are reminded about the mugging of the overdressed pinks, and Phil wonders whether this will be the first time in history where being mugged at the close of an NEL actually made any difference, or whether they'll "rebound from this setback." Oh, the unpredictability of it all. When will the Significance Alarm go off in this episode -- that is, when will be the first moment in which anything occurs that actually matters? Sometimes, the Significance Alarm used to go off in the previous episode, you know. Now, it rarely goes off before the third set of commercials.


continue to pg 2


Provenance
Original URL
http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com:80/story.cgi?show=76&ampstory=6789&amppage=1&limit=&sort=
Captured
2005-11-08
Page Type
recap (60%)
Wayback Machine
View original capture

Historical archive · About · Takedown policy