You knew it had to happen after they started out with twenty people -- it's a double-boot week. Jeff announces early that the challenge is for reward only, and that, no matter who wins, each tribe will get rid of someone. Despite the fact that it's a challenge that seems like bulk should be important, Aitu wins again, partly because Candice (!) is so tough (!). Back at camp, Cao Boi is getting on various nerves quite a bit, but he has himself a plan. He's "figured out" that Jonathan must have the immunity idol, so he wants the rest of the group to split votes between Jonathan and Candice, meaning that Jonathan will play the idol and Candice will be booted. In part, Cao Boi wants to do this because he believes that when the merge comes, the original Raro -- the white tribe -- will get back together and boot everyone, so it's time to make a dent now. Over at Raro (the new Raro, that is), Cristina is still on incredibly shaky ground, despite her efforts to scrape herself off the bottom of the barrel in terms of the esteem of her tribe. It looks briefly like there might be some kind of Jenny-booting coup bubbling, but indeed, when the boot comes, Cristina takes the hit. Cao Boi does, too, and very little winds up changing this week. Six episodes in, we still have thirteen people. More bootings!
Previously on Yeesh, I Take Back Everything I Ever Said About Mashed Potatoes, OKAY?: the Raro men thumped on their chests and growled meaningfully. The reward challenge brought Adam and Nate a little closer to Seven Minutes In He-Man Heaven, and ultimately gave Raro even more ways than that to get all spicy-like. Jonathan went to Exile Island, dug Yao Ming's grave, and decided that somebody else already had the idol. Not Yao Ming -- the other idol. Cristina was beginning to get on everyone's nerves, especially the octopus whose parts she uncaringly slopped all over the beach. Jenny started to seem more and more like one of those girls who could easily get kind of "Oh. Mah. GAHD" about everything, though more figuratively than literally. Aitu won a really cool immunity challenge where they piled everybody onto a tiny little tower, and Raro just had too much bulk for its own good and had to send somebody home. At first, it seemed like Cristina was going to bossify herself right to a place called Sequester, but at the last minute, Stephannie chose the wrong moment for a carbohydrate craving and found herself branded a quitter and sent packing on the slow gravy boat to nowhere. Thus, Cristina was spared the boot, though not the sort of painful lecture at tribal council about what a bossypants she is.
We are pre-credits, post-tribal-council, on Night 14 at Raro. A small lizard wonders what everyone will have to say about who was voted off when they return. He is fascinated. He is on pins and needles. Several rats, meanwhile, are eating as quickly as they can in anticipation of being interrupted at any moment. Parvati walks dead-eyed across the screen in night vision, describing it as a "rough tribal council." Rebecca explains to us that the moments immediately after tribal council were pretty tense, because Cristina turned out to be kind of offended by the wholesale drawing and quartering to which she was subjected in front of Probst. Rebecca insists that nobody meant for it to be a giant, grade-school, dodgeball-like pile-on. These things just happen. They're out of everyone's control. It's not as if you can make choices about what comes out of your mouth; you just have to -- what's the phrase I'm thinking of? -- keep it real! It's keeping-it-real time at Raro! I love keeping-it-real time! It's the best time of the year to see assholes in bloom.
Cristina sits at the fire with Adam and Jenny, and she apparently can't believe she sat through all that dismissive lecturing from such a bunch of scrubs. You can sort of tell that this is her attitude. She tells Adam that, in the past few days, she's noticed people being kind of rude and nasty to her, even just about small matters like passing things to her. "I said you were annoying today!" Adam says, as if this is some kind of...defense? I guess he's arguing that he told her how he felt, and that he didn't merely take it out on her by refusing to pass the coconuts. Or whatever. Cristina tells Adam that he didn't tell her she was annoying. Returning quickly to the matter of manners, Adam accuses Cristina of saying "gimme that" when she wants things passed to her. She insists that she always says "please," and he tells her that she doesn't. This is...riveting, really. The whole matter of who said "please" and who did not say "please" is the reason this show became a hit.
Brad, whose feelings about all this ganging up on people seem to be decidedly mixed, interviews that he's heard Adam "snap at" Cristina and call her "annoying," and that he thinks it's kind of low and tacky. Brad thinks the issue is just that Cristina is used to being in charge and not used to people telling her what to do. Back at the fire, Cristina says that she wishes they'd just said something to her about the things that were bothering them, but Adam insists that it's just "her personality" -- in other words, he claims didn't tell her until it was time to ambush her at tribal council, because there's nothing she can do about it. In a comment I like even less than this crap from Adam, Jenny jumps in and says, "We accept you for who you are! You can't change it, Cristina." That is...just a horrible thing to do to someone. "I've known you for all of a week, I don't like you, and the things I don't like about you are so fundamental to your being that it's not worth even telling you what they are, so I'm barely going to bother." And then to top it off by claiming the high ground by saying "we accept you for who you are"? That's not accepting people for who they are. That's the opposite of accepting people for who they are. "I know you're bossy, but I can deal with that and still enjoy the good things about you" is accepting people for what they are. "Your flaws are many, and I accept them as permanent" is quite different. As to this whole thing, I mean...whatever, I get that Cristina is "bossy," and I doubt I'd want to hang out with her, but for fuck's sake, you might as well agree to spend a day or two pointing out to her when she's being bossy. It's an act of fairness, being willing to engage people once you've ripped them a new asshole.
"It's just the way it is," Adam tells Cristina about his dislike of her, because he doesn't really have a very good reason other than "you're old and not cute," and he doesn't really want to talk about that fact too much. Even in night vision, you can see that Cristina is crying. In an interview, she sniffles that she really didn't have any idea that they all felt that way, but she says that she's just going to keep her head up and go on. She winds up relating this all back to being shot, which is sort of nutsy, but I do feel bad for her. I'm sure she's irritating and bossy, but they're being the worst kind of low-class social tyrants about it. It seems like Adam and Jenny are really dominating the tribe socially, and they're both just pains in the ass I hope will go home very soon.
Credits. Adam even looks smug in still pictures.
Clouds speed-float over the red sky. The sun comes up, and it is Day 15 at Aitu. Ozzy is spear fishing from the boat as Jonathan sits in it to collect the fish. Ozzy offers us a little speech about his fishing prowess, which isn't particularly noteworthy except that it involves his references to his "special holes." You should keep that to yourself, Ozzy. He assures us that, with the help of his special holes, he can easily bring in ten fish in an hour. If I had a nickel for every guy I've heard that from. Okay, not really. In an interview, Jonathan gives Ozzy full credit, not only for being great with the fish, but for being able to hold his breath for an insanely long time. Jonathan allows that they need Ozzy's strength on a group level, but he also says that Ozzy is an individual threat in a big way. Basically, Jonathan is trying to keep Ozzy as long as possible and still get rid of him before the merge, which is just about how I'd handle him. Get as many fish as you can, stock up on protein, and then? Boot!
We watch Yul and JessiFlicka go together to collect some treemail. It contains a mast of sorts. "This head-to-head match/ needs a well-balanced team/ To win your first feast/ you'll kick and you'll scream." Wow, four lines. And only two of them, in retrospect, kind of have nothing to do with the challenge. For obvious reasons, everyone is happy to hear that they could win a feast, not that this group has particularly been starving in the usual fashion. I've never seen so much seafood dropping down various gullets in my life. Because there's no mention of immunity, JessiFlicka is the first to point out that Aitu apparently doesn't have to bring the immunity idol. OR DO THEY? See, it turns out that Cao Boi has this...thing, kind of, about bringing the immunity idol everywhere. He likes to have it with him. He thinks it's special. He uses the word "holy." Dude. It's not holy. It was made by the prop department. When they're not doing that, they make rocks out of Styrofoam. I mean...come on. I'm as crazy about sacred objects as the person, but we're into worshipping-plastic-Jesus territory. Jonathan tells Cao Boi that he doesn't love this idea of bringing the idol along, and that he thinks they should talk about it as a group, rather than having Cao Boi haughtily shove it down everyone's throats, which is what he's trying to do. That's kind of my problem with it -- that Cao Boi is appointing himself Chief Spirituality Officer, and...I mean, it's not like there aren't other religions that think the creation of false idols is kind of bad. I don't think that's Jonathan's issue, but it's not like the uniformly "spiritual" response here is to drag that thing all over the place and revere it. Jonathan also says that he thinks it's rude to bring the immunity idol to a reward challenge, because it comes off like bad sportsmanship, like they're rubbing it in by bringing it when it's not relevant.
Despite the fact that Jonathan is really quite reasonable about this and just seems to think everyone should give an opinion, Cao Boi gets all, "Oh, have it your way." You know, he may be annoying, self-important, and weird, but at least he's passive-aggressive. In an interview, Jonathan says that Cao Boi is "rubbing some people the wrong way." LIKE ME. He adds, "He does have to get talked out of a tree once in a while." Hee. That, I believe, and while all the trees so far have been figurative, I wouldn't be surprised if one of them turned out not to be one of these days. In quite a measured interview, Yul basically says that Cao Boi has been through lots of things and knows lots of things, but is "very hard-headed." He adds, "He's just an unpredictable guy." Yul talks about people like he's writing performance reviews. Like the boss whose employee comes to work with a puppy and a beach ball, and in the review, the boss writes, "He has a lot of energy." That boss? I think Yul could be that boss.
Challenge area. Basically, there are two sets of three poles set in sand. For those who wondered, I predict that within the "playing field," which is a big rectangular flat sand playground, that's stunt sand -- not just random sand from the beach, but soft sand, probably specially made or chosen for its ability not to injure anyone. When Raro shows up, Aitu learns that Stephannie has been voted off. I have to add that Probst really doesn't look bad today, in his white shirt and army green pants, except that I cannot stand that yellow hat he's adopted for the season. It's just...it's like he thinks that's a color found in nature, and other than in the inside of an acorn squash, it just isn't.
In any event, the challenge for today requires each tribe to choose three people, each of whom will cling to a pole. Then your tribe will go after each of those people with two of your people, who will have to pry the pole person off the pole and drag him or her for a distance across the beach. This has something in common with the old dunking challenge from Palau, and of course it has quite a bit in common with last season's awesome sand-wrestling challenge. I tend to sort of...well, I like this kind of challenge, provided that nobody gets hurt.
(Note: I add that caveat only because I have to. I don't really care if people get hurt. More arms and legs torn off, I say. It can only enhance the drama.)
So, Probst explains, the good news is that the winner of the challenge will be enjoying lamb, bread, and apple cider. Apparently, brutal challenges result in being rewarded with lamb, the cruelest meat. The bad news is that they'll be eating at tribal council, because this week, she is the double-boot. I have to think the teams can't be surprised -- we're fifteen days in, and there are still thirteen people playing. Furthermore, tribal council is tonight, so that's going to be three people gone in two days. The challenge requires equal numbers of men and women, so Aitu, which has an extra man, has to have a man sit out. Unsurprisingly, they elect to bench Cao Boi, who is not so much about the wrestling, unless he is wrestling demons out of your sinuses.
So on the posts for Aitu are Candice, Ozzy, and Sundra. On the posts for Raro are Cristina, Nate, and Jenny. Interesting decision, putting Nate on a post. My impression is that in order to have women wrestling women and men wrestling men, both tribes were told to put two women and one guy on posts, and then to have a pair of men to go after the men and a pair of women to go after the women -- and yes, this means that the pairs of women who are doing the dragging have to go twice.
First out are Parvati and Rebecca trying to get to Candice, as well as JessiFlicka and Becky trying to get to Jenny. Candice has powerful arms, more than you could see before, and she also is very long-limbed, which she knows how to leverage in this situation. She has herself wrapped around that pole like crazy. Jenny comes off her post a lot more easily. Not only does Candice hold out, but after they finally get Candice pried off the post, she manages to get part of the way back to it. Meanwhile, Becky and JessiFlicka grab one foot each and start to drag Jenny. Unfortunately, this spreads Jenny's legs a little, and Jenny suffers one of the indignities you risk by wearing bikini bottoms to a challenge, which is that she has to be given the crotch blur when she exposes a little more than she intends to for just a second. (I was going to say "for a flash," but...I won't.) I would also point out that Rebecca has her arm at least sort of around Candice's neck as they pull her off, but Candice manages not to complain a bit. Becky and JessiFlicka get Jenny back to the starting line, so Aitu is in the lead, and Yul and Jonathan are off to deal with Nate. Uh-oh. Nate is big.
As for Candice? Well, she's kicking. And fighting. Putting up a hell of a battle, really. Man alive, I wouldn't have expected such feistiness from someone so scrawny. Jonathan and Yul are predictably having a hard time with Nate, who has hit upon a good method of continuing to hook one of his strong legs back around the pole every time they get one pried off. As Parvati continues barely to help Rebecca try to wrestle Candice, Nate tries an interesting approach by quite actively trying to tackle Yul, just to make it take longer. Ultimately, Nate is dragged back over the line before Candice, meaning that -- get this -- Candice held out longer than two people put together, and one of them was Nate. That is a tough girl. I realize that she also didn't get very strong competition, but that is still an achievement. She made those women work very hard to get her moved.
Becky and Flicka head off to fetch Cristina. Furthermore, finally -- finally -- Parvati and Rebecca have finished with Candice, so Brad and Adam go out to get Ozzy. Mismatch! I mean, Ozzy is spry, but he's outweighed by about a Ford Explorer. This is not something I think plays to Ozzy's strengths. And Brad yanks Ozzy off the post how? By grabbing him around the neck. I think it's very, very hard not to do that, more than it's hard to do it. Meanwhile, JessiFlicka pulls Cristina backwards almost exactly the same way they just did with Ozzy, and Cristina is all, "You're choking!" But of course, if she were being choked, she wouldn't be able to yell that she was being choked. I'm sure she doesn't like it, and she's clearly uncomfortable, but I don't think she's being choked any more than anyone else was. Even less appealing is the fact that Cristina follows this up by getting on top of JessiFlicka, putting a forearm across JessiFlicka's neck, pushing down, and saying, "Stay away from my neck." So she did that choking bit much more intentionally and much more dangerously than Flicka did. Bad form, Cristina. Very bad form. Jeff has to tell her to knock it off.
Ozzy is busy being totally outweighed by Brad and Adam, who are just kind of scooting him toward the line. He's fighting hard, but he's not going to last all that long.
Meanwhile, over in the land of Cristina not covering herself with glory, Cristina decides to try to yank JessiFlicka's pants off. Which...are you kidding me? That's a roller girl. They don't embarrass easily. The one I know has a teammate who put pictures of her...let's call them "crotch abrasions"...on the internet. I'm also pretty sure I see an out-and-out hair pull by Cristina against Becky. And then, Adam and Brad get Ozzy back to the line, so Parvati and Rebecca can go back out for Sundra, the last person. One promising development comes when Becky and Flicka figure out that they've gotten themselves situated at opposite ends of Cristina's body and they kind of have her wrapped up, so they can roll, and if they roll together, they should move gradually toward the finish line. I think this is Becky's discovery, but it works only briefly. Cristina makes another hair-pulling move for which Jeff has to caution her. What's , Cristina? Are you going to hit them with your purse? Sundra clings tightly to her post. Ultimately, Becky gets hold of Cristina's shoes and just starts to pull, as Flicka pushes. Finally, they get the reluctant and determined Cristina to the line and touch her foot to it, and we are done.
I liked that challenge. It was tough, it was fair, there was very little dirty play, and the women mostly wrestled hard and fair and unapologetically. It's pretty cool seeing a roller girl and a cop wrestle. I mean, the two pulling had the advantage of there being two of them, but the pole person had the pole, and also had the advantage of not needing to go anywhere, so I didn't feel like anybody got treated too badly. As Jeff explains, the way it will work later is that Aitu will go to tribal council first, and then they'll eat and watch as Raro has its tribal council. Jeff says that there will also be one more surprise. Isn't there always? I just hope it has nothing to do with Rupert. For some reason, that's my undying fear. Jeff sends everybody home.
A flute tootles to bring us back to Aitu after the challenge, where Jonathan is saying that he "never took on a dude that big." Heh. You actor. (I saw him on The Nanny this week. Ha!) "It was fun, but it was crazy," Jonathan adds. (Same with seeing him on The Nanny, by the way.) Ozzy adds, "Yeah, those guys kicked my ass." Aw. Poor Ozzy. Sundra, in an interview, is nothing but happy and proud of her tribe. She can barely contain her fist-pumping, tooth-clenching enthusiasm: "I was so proud of the tribe today in challenge!" She thinks they worked together very well. "It came down to the girls," Ozzy says to the team at the fire, and it's basically true. They got that lead from Candice, after all. "I've never wrestled a cop before," says JessiFlicka coyly. Hee. Somehow, I suspect it won't be your last time, dear. In an interview, JessiFlicka looks back on how Cristina started pulling at her hair and clothes when she started losing. Which was pretty much true. The entire tribe is very happy about having earned themselves some food later. On the other hand, as JessiFlicka interviews, it sucked to come home knowing that somebody was still going to have to go.
Speaking of which -- and that is the last sensible transition you'll see for a while -- Cao Boi is in the shelter with Yul, and wants to tell him about a dream he had. Cao Boi explains that he had a dream about people coming into a village and kidnapping other people. With a rope. And making them turn invisible. (Yul's face: "Okaaaaaay.") And then, in the dream, Cao Boi realized that he couldn't defeat these invisible-making kidnappers. Cao Boi cuts in for an interview in which he explains the rest of the dream, because it's very easy to get lost. It turns out that the dream also included a "shaman lady." He then explains that, much as traditional mythology would suggest, the shaman lady was offering credit-card applications.
Yyyyep.
So the way Yul explains it, the shaman lady in the dream asked Cao Boi if he had an American Express card or a Visa, and he started to review marketing materials. You know, as you do. He asked her what he needed these applications for, and she told him that he needed three of each. And it was at this moment that Cao Boi realized how to defeat the immunity idol. You can understand, since now the shaman lady with the credit-card applications made it so obvious.
Okay, actually, what it is...Cao Boi wants to try to smoke out the immunity idol. Fortunately, Yul helps out with the explanation of Cao Boi's strategy, keeping it from taking a year for Cao Boi himself to explain it. Cao Boi thinks that Jonathan has the immunity idol, or possibly Candice does. Therefore, he wants to put three votes each on Candice and Jonathan, which should force Jonathan to use the idol, and should then result in the booting of Candice. From Cao Boi's perspective, this is a good plan because it gets rid of the idol, and because it boots Candice or possibly Jonathan, both of whom Cao Boi thinks are part of an Old Raro (read: white people) alliance. Yul tells us that, based on what Cao Boi believes the situation to be, "the plan is ingenious." Of course, Jonathan...doesn't actually have the immunity idol, because Yul has it, as he reminds us. Whoops. It isn't clear how Cao Boi got to be quite so certain that Jonathan has the idol, but the way he justifies it to us is that Jonathan has been to Exile Island twice, while Candice and Yul have only been there once each. This gives Jonathan a better chance of having it...sort of. Cao Boi also is very worried about "the Caucasians" having all five members at the merge, because the rest of them will all just be knocked off. Of course...all five original Puka are also still in the game, so couldn't the same be said of them? Hmmmmm?
Raro. Nate is spear-fishing, and he is grumpy. He says in an interview that they lost the challenge. And "it hurts." He is catching another giant octopus to make himself feel better. But apparently, the octopus-catching just isn't as special as it used to be, because it's no longer a shriek-to-the-heavens event. Elsewhere, Cristina dabs her forehead, and then tells us in an interview that she's nervous about tribal council. Since, you know, it seems like nobody likes her. She goes to Brad and asks him if he'd be open to giving her a chance. Not that she really seems to suggest any alternatives. Brad is a good place to start, but Cristina needs more of a plan than this. Cristina also asks Parvati for a chance, and Parvati nods, but then says that she doesn't know whom she's voting for. Cristina tells us that she hopes her effort in the challenge meant something. But still? She's "bummed." Now, Cristina tries probably the most hopeless of all approaches, which is an approach to Adam, in which she just tries to make peace, talking about how she isn't mad at him or anything, but in which she still really doesn't offer anything as far as an alternative plan. It's just way too obvious that there's nothing to this except "please don't vote me off, please please." And that's just not going to be enough. Cristina's in a bad position, because it only takes four votes to get rid of you, and Adam and Jenny are wretches, and Parvati and Rebecca are basically with them. She had a shot, I think, at Brad's vote and maybe Nate's, but I think those were the only ones she had any way of getting, absent a daring plan -- which she is not attempting. There are only seven people on this tribe, lady. If you're going to get the focus off yourself, you have to give three of them somebody else to vote for. Adam goes to talk to Jenny, and they agree that it's still Cristina. We watch Cristina ask Nate for another chance, too, but...in favor of what? Whom is she suggesting they vote for, and why? Come on, Cristina, have an idea!
Nate interviews that Cristina's effort at the challenge made him think she might be of some value, and then he has a chat with Rebecca in which he says that if Cristina were kept in the game at this point, she'd be insanely loyal to whomever spared her. Nate also makes it clear to Rebecca that he is not happy about the way Adam spoke to Cristina, which he found disrespectful. He also tells Rebecca he's concerned that Jenny is "tight with them other Asians" -- hey, just like what Cao Boi thinks about Candice, sort of! -- and that she'll get with them in the event of a merge. In other words, the two untouched original tribes are starting to make people nervous, and you could spend all day wondering whether that would be as true if they were random old tribes rather than racially based -- and therefore easily remembered -- old tribes. Nate interviews that if he didn't vote against Cristina, it would be Jenny. The problem with that, of course, is that every indication is that Rebecca and Jenny are pals, so who would go along with him, other than Cristina? Nate ponders his options, saying that Cristina is strong, but also has a strong mouth (heh), while Jenny is "sweet" but maybe not so trustworthy. Poor Nate. He feels torn.
After a set of commercials, we are back at Aitu. JessiFlicka and Cao Boi are doing a stretch together where they're back to back, and then one bends forward so that the other bends back. It's kind of cool. I wouldn't think of it, but it might feel pretty nice, particularly if you'd been sleeping on the ground and the person you were partnered with didn't smell like it was Day 15 on Survivor. Meanwhile, Jonathan is having a talk with Yul, in which he's saying that he thinks Cao Boi is a "genuine threat" and should go. He's also genuinely annoying, which I thoroughly believe is the real reason Jonathan is done with him. In an interview, Jonathan presents the Cao Boi boot as a "consensus." Not sure how broad that's supposed to be -- a consensus among...his alliance? The tribe? The halves of his brain? Jonathan says that, with Cao Boi, it's all the little stuff that's making people irritated, including dumb stuff like his wanting to take the idol everywhere. Cao Boi, on the other hand, is busy talking to Ozzy and Flicka about getting Yul and Becky to commit to Plan Voodoo. That would be the plan where they split votes 3-3 between Jonathan and Candice, and everyone gets 0% interest until September 2007. Cao Boi asks Sundra if she understands the plan, and he assigns her to vote for Jonathan. Sundra interviews dryly that Cao Boi "has this theory that the white alliance is going to take over the game." She says that Plan Voodoo might be a good idea, just in the sense that she herself feels "suspicious of Jonathan." She's not really sure why, but it "smells a little fishy" to her. I think Jonathan is one of those guys everyone is suspicious of because it's fairly obvious that he's smart, and that he's not playing a dumb, overemotional game where he's going to walk into a trap at some point and nicely knock himself out for you. I kind of like him, actually, and I'm not surprised that people are a little unsettled by him. He's a guy to worry about, if you're someone else in this game.
Interestingly, at the same time, Becky is telling Yul that she's a little uncomfortable about Jonathan as well. Yul reminds us that his alliance is supposed to be Jonathan, Becky, Candice, and Sundra, but that he's hearing all this noise from the women about not trusting Jonathan. He adds that the suspicion is kind of making him wonder, because if enough people have doubts about a person, maybe there's something to it. While I always think everyone needs to play his own game, I think it's smart to have enough humility to think to yourself, "If everyone else thinks the same thing, is it possible that I'm wrong, instead of all of them?" Cao Boi pulls Yul aside to tell him that they have the six votes necessary for Plan Voodoo: "We're brothers. We've got to remember that." I do not like that. I smell in that remark the implication that because Cao Boi is Vietnamese and Yul is Korean, they're "brothers," which doesn't sound right to me. The rest of the team tells Cao Boi that they're on board for Plan Voodoo -- well, except Jonathan and Candice, obviously. Ozzy interviews that he's not sure whether the plan is a good idea, and right now, there's just a lot of "chaos in camp." In an interview, Yul says that he's a little bummed, because he'd kind of like to play with "honesty and integrity" (bleeech), and he's finding that to be just about impossible to do. You can tell he doesn't watch the show, or he wouldn't be so surprised. I keep expecting to see a little devil-Probst on one of Yul's shoulders and an angel-Probst on the other. And then I get creeped out at the idea of Probst in a red unitard, and I have to stop thinking about that.
Cao Boi and Flicka are lying around, and he's telling her that Yul, Becky, and Sundra are all on board for Plan Voodoo. "Why are they all in there whispering together, then?" Flicka wonders, looking over at the shelter. Heh. "They're just discussing things," Cao Boi reassures her. And then Cao Boi quzzes Yul about whether he's ever had an ulcer, which is pretty funny. FEELING IT, YUL? I don't think I've ever seen the integrity battle give anyone an actual physical illness before. Jonathan tells us that he'd be "shocked" to be voted off, and that if he goes, he will have been seriously outplayed. I'd say so. And yes, to the many, many people who have written me to ask, I have noticed that he sounds just like Alan Alda.
Aitu tribal council. Jeff welcomes them. He mentions that Cao Boi has brought the idol, and he'd like to know why. Cao Boi argues that they brought it because they don't have immunity anymore -- they're voting somebody out, after all. Yul looks embarrassed by crazy Uncle Cao Boi. Jeff doesn't understand what Cao Boi wants to do with the idol now that he has it here, and Cao Boi says "he'll be another member." And he plunks the idol on the ground. Sigh. I'm so weary from watching attention-seeking behavior. Jeff kind of doesn't understand why they keep bringing the idol to the wrong things. He asks Ozzy what the story is. Ozzy says, as diplomatically as he can, that for whatever reason, Cao Boi wants to bring the thing everywhere they go. Nobody else cares, but why argue? He says it nicer, though.
Jeff asks Yul about Cao Boi, and Yul calls him a "shaman-cheerleader-fire-tender." I was waiting for "crazy neighbor who always thinks the government is coming to repossess the bank and therefore keeps all his money in a peanut jar." Yul doesn't say this, but simply calls Cao Boi "very loyal, in his way." Yul closes with this gem: "I can't say I fully understand him. You know, he has his own perspective on things." ["Hee, that's like when older ladies don't know how to say that something is hideous or crazy, so they just use the all-purpose euphemism 'different.'" -- Wing Chun] Jeff asks Cao Boi if he's always misunderstood, and Cao Boi says that people always love him or hate him. He says that if he's got the time, people usually come to understand him, but yes, he -- like all great self-declared outcasts -- is often misunderstood. Jeff asks whether the tribe has leaders. Yul says he's not sure whether there are leaders, but that Jonathan and Cao Boi are "probably the most vocal." He calls Jonathan "sort of a natural leader." Asked whether that seems fair to him, Jonathan says that he appreciates it, but that he doesn't feel like he's assumed that role intentionally. You can tell he knows that outright leadership is the hot potato of this game, and that you definitely do not want it if you can pass it off to someone else without looking too obvious. I think he should have said, "Well, it's just like a leader to say that about me, Yul."
Jeff asks Ozzy what, at this point, one bases a vote on anyway, particularly when the tribe is doing well and doesn't have obvious problems. Ozzy says he's not even really sure. He's looking into his heart. Uh-oh. That is a large and squishy place to try to find a vote. Cao Boi is asked how he's thinking about the vote, and Cao Boi says that it's all about the "big picture," and "down the road" and so forth. He also goes into a chess metaphor, saying that he wants to "expose the queen." Jeff is perplexed, and he wants to know what the "queen" is. Cao Boi says that the queen is immunity. Jeff figures out that Cao Boi is talking about the individual idol: "So tonight's vote, for you, is trying to expose the hidden immunity idol." "Yes," Cao Boi agrees. Jonathan looks either amused or concerned (or both) about this development.
Jeff says that it's time for voting. If anybody has the hidden idol, then he or she will play it after the votes have been cast. Jonathan votes for "Cowboy," calling him a "wild card." Sundra votes. JessiFlicka votes for Jonathan. "Sorry, bub," she says dramatically. "I lost my trust in you." Ozzy votes. Cao Boi votes for Candice. "I hope we stick with this voodoo plan," he whispers. "One of you has the immunity idol. Let's hope it comes out." Yul, Becky, and Candice vote. Yul looks miserable and anxious.
Jeff returns with the votes. First: "Cowboy." Candice. "Johnathon." "Cowboy." "Cowboy." And that one's bad, because that means the plan is not happening. And the sixth person voted out is..."Cowboy." Wow. [Sic] was evicted unanimously! Cao Boi brings his torch for snuffing. And then Cao Boi leaves. I have to admit that I will miss the crazy old nut. Particularly if I ever have a headache, which happens pretty frequently during reality TV season. Jeff says that, now, the remaining members of Aitu will be able to eat and eavesdrop, but first they have to wait for Raro.
In his exit interview, Cao Boi speaks in a most unfortunate way: "I did learn that I am most vulnerable among the Asian community. People who are like me, but not like me. I was aware of them in the beginning, but eventually, I learned to trust them. I should have known better." So...Cao Boi's parting words are essentially "Goes to show -- you just can't trust Asian people." Way to go, dude. That's just the kind of thing I was hoping this season would teach us.
Now, it's time for the members of Raro to come to tribal council. They file in. When they're all there, the members of Aitu are served their meat and bread and cider. Nate actually watches them eat with his hands over his mouth. Heh. I think he's trying to keep himself from diving over there and taking something.
When we return from commercials, Aitu is eating. Jeff tells Raro to note that Cao Boi is gone. Jeff asks Adam whether he cares about the food, and Adam assures Jeff that they have plenty of food, and that he doesn't care for either lamb or apple cider anyway. Nerts to you, Jeff! Nate, on the other hand? Bothered. Jeff asks Nate about seeming quiet. Nate admits that he's distracted by the food. Jeff asks Adam how frustrating it is to lose two-thirds of the challenges. Adam says it's tough, but that Candice did it all today -- she got a lead for her team, and she wore out Parvati and Rebecca. Candice mouths something like, "Thank you," and then it's another "I love you," and yuck, seriously. Adam gets all goopy-grinning, and this instantly makes me like Candice 25% less. Jeff asks Brad about how Raro prides itself on physical strength. Brad says that it's not about one challenge; it's about the bigger picture of "working their ass off at camp." Jeff asks Cristina whether the tribe feels like "a sinking ship." Yikes. She says she doesn't think so. They still have a chance. Well, she doesn't personally have a chance, but...you know. Jeff asks Brad about the whomping Cristina took at the last tribal council, and wants to know if he felt bad for her. Brad says that he did feel bad for Cristina. He thinks everyone should get the benefit of the doubt. Jenny wears a bitchface, not that we really have to give much of a news bulletin on that one.
Jeff asks Jenny how it was when they got back to camp. Jenny says that Cristina was upset. "People in our group right out said, 'You're annoying,'" says Jenny, stressing the "you're annoying" as if she really means it. Jenny says she understands how Cristina felt, and that it was "embarrassing." What she doesn't acknowledge, of course, is that it was also mean. Jenny goes on to say that she just doesn't understand how the tribe could have avoided offending Cristina. And I suspect that Jenny actually doesn't know, which is sad. She doesn't understand all the ways in which they could have simply chosen to behave differently, which would have made everything end in an entirely different way. Cristina admits that the last tribal council bothered her, saying that she thought these people were her friends, and that it just didn't work out that way. She says that it was "definitely a blow." She insists, though, that she gave it her best effort in the challenge in spite of the way that she'd been treated. Jeff asks Adam about this, and he agrees that she kicked butt in the challenge, but goes back to his argument that it's just her personality, because it "clashes with ours" (he likes to speak for everyone, I've noticed). He also goes back to that really annoying "she can't do anything about it; it's who she is" thing. Which is a perfectly condescending way to make Cristina feel both shitty and powerless. Jeff asks Nate about losing another member, and about looking out for himself. "Mos def," Nate says. He adds that he's wondering about "scenarios" and thinking about what to do. But he's still hoping that the tribe will come from behind.
Before the vote, Jeff has a surprise. Aitu is now going to "kidnap" one member of Raro. This person will eat. This person will not be voted off and cannot vote. This person will go back to camp with Aitu and stay there through the reward challenge. After conferring, Aitu decides to take Nate, which I think is pretty dumb. If you have one alienated person, you take that person. You cause chaos, and you earn someone's loyalty by saving her. Granted, Nate is probably the most likable person on that tribe, and there's something to be said for that approach. He's probably also the happiest to have the food. I have to wonder how much Cristina hurt her chances of being picked for this by being so mean to Flicka and Becky during the challenge. If I were Flicka, and if she'd held me down by my neck and choked me on purpose, I think I'd have said, "Nah, they can vote her off, frankly." In any event, Nate is the lucky one, so he heads over and starts eating.
Okay, now it's time for voting. Jenny votes. Rebecca votes. Adam votes for Cristina, saying, "You're a nice woman, but our tribe is stronger without you." As one of the EEFPs noted, he actually means...the exact opposite of that: "You're a strong woman, but our tribe is nicer without you." Parvati votes, looking unhappy. Brad votes -- for Jenny. Cristina does, too. Jeff goes off to tally.
Jeff returns with the urn-o-votes, but he sends Aitu back to camp before reading them. First vote: Jenny. Then Cristina. Then another Jenny, which Jenny was not anticipating, I don't think. But then they're all Cristina, so there is to be no surprise, and Cristina is done. She takes her torch to get snuffed. The tribe has spoken. DUUUUUUN! When she's gone, Jeff sort of makes fun of Raro for getting rid of different people for all different reasons, and then he sends them off. I hate Jeff's final moment where he tries to give them one to grow on. I truly do.
In her farewell interview, Cristina says that she had a good experience, but that she feels "taken advantage of." She also says she met good people and "some really awful people," but she says that's "part of the game." I hope she recovers; she seems awfully bitter at this point. I don't know that these were "really awful people." They're just kind of...bratty and self-important, and if you're not ready for that, you don't want to be on this show, lady.
time: Yul doesn't think Aitu should fight in front of Nate, but JessiFlicka doesn't really care. Exile Island? Still sucks.