The Merge That Wasn't There

S05E07

By Joanna

Previously on Survivor, Ted and Clay predicted an upcoming merge. Robb bit Ken's hand, which was fuckin' tryin' to feed him, and then fuckin' tried to feed himself, by biting into some contraband bananas. Sook Jai enjoyed a Thai feast, but didn't enjoy losing the Immunity Challenge, nor did they enjoy the resulting Tribal Council, which led to Robb's ejection. So maybe they did enjoy it after all. In any case, ten are left. Tonight, one more will go.

As the members of Sook Jai walk back from Tribal Council on Night 18, Erin says it was one of the hardest things she ever did. She tells us that after bonding as a tribe, it's hard to vote someone out because they are your family "for right now." Jake doesn't think anyone feels good about the vote, but promises that it will only get harder. Despite her Tribal Council misgivings, Erin doesn't feel completely confident about the allegiances of any of her tribe members. She lies inside the shelter with Penny, and the two women whisper about the relationship between Ken and Shii Devil; they think the two may already have an alliance. Back in the interview, Erin tells us she's keeping an eye on them.

Turns out we're keeping an eye on them too, as we join Ken and Shii Devil by the fire. Ken rants about his recent argument with Robb, and insists that he told the truth about everything. He reveals Penny's betrayal, and Shii Devil says, "It's kinda messed up that Penny keeps doin' that." So they've caught Penny in lies before? In any case, Ken responds that Penny's just playing the game, but "playing hard." Shii Devil says several times that Penny's playing "hardball," hoping Ken will catch on and agree. He finally does. He then calls Penny "sneaky," to which Shii Devil exclaims, "She's so sneaky about it!" In an interview, Ken explains that he is watching Penny because of her sneakiness. He knows her "MO," and sees right through it. He adds, "I can just picture her in high school. I know how she was when she was in high school." Even I hate high-school girls, and I was one. Ken knows how Penny "operates." Back at the fire, Shii Devil suspects that Penny wants to vote out Shii Devil, and Ken reveals that Penny has been after Shii Devil from the beginning. Shii Devil tells us in an interview that Ken was upset about Penny's manipulation; even though he knows that's just the way Penny is, he is still concerned because he's strong and will enter the merge as a target. Shii Devil and Ken continue to poke and walk around the fire. After a goodnight hug, they promise to "see [each other] tomorrow." But aren't they headed off to bed in the same place?

Quick-moving time-lapse clouds bring us to Day 19 at Sook Jai. Chuay Gahn must have been watching bark peel during this time, because we haven't checked in with them yet. The tribe receives a treemail clue, which includes five shades of paint, and reads: "A different color per person/ Adorn yourselves well/ Show some personality/ 'Cause you can never tell/ Use only one color/ Don't share with a friend/ Take pride in your artistry/ It will pay off in the end." This sounds like a challenging competition for our S10 -- particularly the whole "show some personality" part. Jake exclaims as he opens the mail, "Hmm...let's see what these are -- probably little finger paints. Oooh!" He is very excited, as are the other members of the tribe. Ken is fanatical about getting the blue paint as they attempt to distribute the colors. Shii Devil voice-overs that the tribe didn't know what the paints were for, but that they assumed it had to do with a merger.

We finally make our way over to Chuay Gahn, where a happy Ted yells, "Ey! It's body paint stuff!" The tribe members cackle and high-five each other. Clay urges the others to "show personality," which is funny. Personality just kind of is, and the fact that they have to work at it says a lot about them. A montage of the tribe members painting themselves follows. Helen's artwork looks like it will be a real problem, while Jan has a triangle on her forehead. Ted is painting himself -- including his shiny bald pate -- in a metallic gold. He glistens and poses in the sun.

The colorful tribes strut into the challenge. Peachy welcomes them while attempting not to crack up over Helen, who has painted herself up in blue-black paint to looks just like The Joker. Even more so than non-painted Zoe from last season. Jan's forehead triangle has evolved into a full pointy sun. Peachy congratulates them on making it to Day 19: he says it is a "physical and political feat" that none of the booted six was able to accomplish. Peachy thought it would be fun to give the S10 a chance to get to know each other and to "spend a little quality time one-on-one." He explains that in randomly selecting their paint colors, they matched themselves up with someone from the other tribe. At this, the orange-painted Penny totally checks out Brian and blushes. Too bad there wasn't any pink paint to choose from. Brian checks her out, too. Peachy calls the pairs out; they will meet in the middle of the circle and randomly select one of five baskets, two of which contain further instructions. Afterward, they can find a private spot on the beach to get to know each other. As we see the pairings happen, Jan voice-overs the process, in case we didn't get it the first time. Clay is paired with Shii Devil; Penny with Brian, who starts to kiss her but then changes his mind and dodges into a hug at the last minute; Ted with Erin, who doesn't look like she knows how to hug someone of Ted's sheer girth; and Helen with Ken. This leaves Jake for Jan, the latter of whom tells us, "As luck would have it, Jake and I ended up the same thing! So that was real funny 'cause we were the original ones to pick tribes!" Jake and Jan hug, and Peachy tells them to have fun. They walk off swinging their held hands, and Peachy likes it!

The tinkly music of blossoming, orange-colored love plays as Penny and Brian sit together on the beach. They toast each other with fruit from their basket, and then Brian explains in an interview that they exchanged information as to how both tribes were living. Penny tells Brian that Sook Jai "did a lotta oysters and snails in the beginning," and Brian commiserates on how difficult it is to clean shellfish. They must have had a really uneventful conversation for Mark Burnett to forgo the chance to make like a romance was brewing.

Clay and Shii Devil don't have fruit in their basket, but they manage to "wow" over a little scroll instead. The scroll reads, "Getting to know you/ Getting to know them/ Go to Chuay Gahn camp/ But with foe or friend?" It looks like there's more to the clue, but we're only subjected to the first part. In an interview, Clay reiterates that Shii Devil was instructed to visit Chuay Gahn's camp, and that "the other couple" got a similar note in their basket. As he says this, we see Helen unscrolling the clue she and Ken received.

Shii Devil and Clay chat each other up en route to Chuay Gahn's beach. Shii Devil marvels that Chuay Gahn has a cove and cave, and tells Clay they don't have either at Sook Jai: "We had a rooster wakin' us up for a while. Then we ate 'im." Clay says that they have many monkeys around the Chuay Gahn camp, and Shii Devil is surprised. An amazed Clay asks, "You haven't seen monkeys?" then tells her all about the boat-stealing, grinding Magilla. He puts his hand on Shii Devil's back to guide her as they walk. They finally arrive at the camp, and Clay points out the shelter, which Shii Devil thinks is much better than Sook Jai's.

We move on to Helen and Ken, who have arrived at Sook Jai. Helen is not flattered by her paint, and Ken doesn't appear to be wearing any. Maybe he scrubbed his off when he saw how silly Helen looked in it. Helen exclaims over Sook Jai's bed, but she doesn't sound particularly earnest. Ken confirms that they did indeed make it themselves. Helen is surprised that Sook Jai has chickens, and Ken reveals that they've already eaten two of them. Helen responds, "You gotta be kidding me!" In an interview, Helen says that her first impression of Sook Jai was amazement over how well they built their structure. Ken and Helen toast each other with fruit from their basket and say, "Cheers," except Ken says, "Chee-yahs!" I have never toasted anyone with fruit -- or any food item, for that matter -- but I think I'll have to start doing so. Maybe today when I unwrap my peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch, I'll be sure to step outside my office and toast the secretary's hard-boiled egg. That aside, Helen was surprised to see that Sook Jai's water source was so near to their camp. As Ken shows it to her, Helen tells him that Chuay Gahn has a similar water hole, but that they have to swim a mile to reach it. Or they could paddle there if they hadn't lost their boat, but Helen conveniently leaves that part out. Ken -- who has likely been hanging around Penny too much -- says, "Oh my goodness!" when he learns this news. In an interview, he explains that as one of the four "ambassadors," he listened to Helen but didn't say much: "Let's face it -- this is my enemy." We rejoin them; Ken is questioning Helen about her tribe's ability to get along. Joker-faced Helen looks away, and then says they like each other "as much as you can like strangers." In an interview, she tells us she is a "suspicious new Englander and he's a New York cop." She didn't want to give up Chuay Gahn's secrets "to the cop" so he could run back to Sook Jai with them. Why not just call him a "pig" and get it over with?

The tight-lipped exchange between Helen and Ken is juxtaposed with Shii Devil's outpouring of information to Clay. We rejoin them as she enthusiastically says, "Well, you know what? At our tribe? We haven't gotten along since Day One! I'll tell you what -- I'll tell you the truth here." In an interview, Shii Devil explains that although her initial strategy was to remain silent and get Chuay Gahn scoop, she "spilled [her] guts" as soon as she got to camp. It's too bad another creature didn't do the gut-spilling, because Shii Devil could have made a nice meal of it. Shii Devil tells Clay that Sook Jai's plan is to stay five strong and vote out the members of Chuay Gahn. I don't know why this is supposed to be some scathing, tribe-stabbing revelation. Of course that's Sook Jai's plan, and it's Chuay Gahn's plan too if they have half a brain between the five of them. In an interview, Clay tells us that he learned about Sook Jai's problems from his conversations with Shii Devil. Shii Devil tells Clay that if Ken wasn't around, she would have already been voted out. She says that he wouldn't let the others vote her out in the interest of fairness -- because she'd worked so hard. She adds, "And Penny -- who, by the way, as sweet as she looks..." which Clay interrupts to say, "Ain't she as sweet as she looks?" Shii Devil insists that Penny is the most manipulative player in Sook Jai. In an interview, Shii Devil tells us that she gave Clay the "down low" on her tribe and "all the crap that [she] hadda [sic] endure," and that he was sympathetic. Clay then reveals to Shii Devil that he and his tribe members hope to get Jake on their side, along with one other member of Sook Jai. Shii Devil immediately exclaims, "Me!"

The entire group reconvenes, and Jake says they had a great time talking about things and learning about each other. I can't even imagine what boringness Erin and Ted and Jake and Jan talked about, since we didn't see even a second's worth of footage of either conversation. Peachy doesn't particularly care what they talked about and immediately changes the subject to the "different experience" had by some members of the group. Shii Devil reveals that she was lucky to go to beautiful Chuay Gahn, where there's a cove, a cave, and "no rain." She had a wonderful experience. Helen points out that Sook Jai doesn't have a cave, "so they don't have any dry shelves to put their clothes and stuff." Ted exclaims, "I heard!" Helen makes about fifteen different expressions on ten seconds, and not one of them is attractive. Peachy reveals that the four members have become ambassadors for the group because "something very different is happening" today. He announces that the tribes will now "live together on one beach," and that the ambassadors will decide which beach that will be. Whatever they choose, they'll get a new boat for the last twenty-one days of the game. The group immediately chooses Chuay Gahn's beach, and Peachy reveals that all of Sook Jai's "personal items" will be waiting for them when they arrive. They get movers? Peachy says that Chuay Gahn will also get "a new home of sorts," because they'll be sharing it with seven other people. He says, "In a sense, you are essentially starting over." "In a sense" and "essentially" is a bit of overkill. He calls the game a "new world," but cites the "eighteen days of education" as being of use to them. Peachy says that the only thing left to do is hug each other. Well, he doesn't come right out and say "hug each other," but we know that's what he means. Brian heads straight for Erin.

A bird soars and lands on a branch. My husband says something about this being cool camera work, but I missed whatever was so great about it. The new tribe -- which doesn't get a new name -- cheers for itself, "Family!" Helen explains that Chuay Gahn did the same cheer when they first arrived in Thailand. They've now proclaimed themselves a family and agreed to work together as such.

The group returns to Chuay Gahn and acts amazed to find food there, even though the tribes got food every time there was a merge in the first four seasons. There are tons of crackers and apples, which the cameras show us about five separate times. Those apples are really popular. Erin voice-overs that they got brie and crackers and rice noodles, and then we hear Clay scream in the background, "Lookit [sic] our noodles!" Erin -- whose cleavage looks very Tori Spelling-esque in this interview -- tells us that they "went nuts" over the grapes, apples, and wine. And if I thought the face-stuffing close-ups were bad in episodes, this segment bests any of that. The S10 get in-depth close-ups of the food going in; it's so overzealously shot that I half expect to see equal footage of the food coming out the other end. Techno music accompanies the face-stuffing. Brian poses dramatically on the beach and says, "Well, it's great to welcome everyone in my kingdom. I love, uh, opening up my house. My casa is tu casa." Hee. He says that although the Sook Jais are in "[his] house," he still has the "home court advantage." But really, the only court this guy belongs in is the king's. As the jester.

Back at camp, Jan lunges for a bottle of wine, yelling, "I love this wine, guys. Let me have it!" She then makes a face -- with the crossed eyes and the lolling tongue and the gaping mouth -- that completely defies my earlier assertion that Jan lacks a range of facial expressions. I'll take the expressionless Jan anyday. Jan tells us that they successfully merged and also came up with a name: Chuay Jai. That alone should be proof that something fishy is going on: the producers of this show would never let them name themselves something so ridiculous. Well, they let them name themselves ridiculous things every season, but not something so ridiculously simple -- not to mention easy to pronounce. Jan feels the need to explain that "Chuay Jai" is the result of combining the names of the two tribes. At the least, golden Ted thinks it's pretty cool. Shii Devil announces that she's going to wash off her body paint and Ted -- who may foresee some grinding opportunities -- follows her, agreeing, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."

Erin explains that, while they washed of the paint, Sook Jai tried to assess the situation. She says that Chuay Gahn has been extremely "hospitable" to the members of her tribe, and has made them feel at home. Shii Devil, Ted, and Clay frolic in the water, and Clay yells, "Bring some wine! Bring some wine!" to someone on shore. Meanwhile, Erin and Penny stand in the shallow surf, smiling grimly. Shii Devil exclaims that she loves it at Chuay Gahn and thinks they made the right choice. The camera pans back to reveal a cluster of the entire group in the water, except Erin and Penny, who still refuse to join in. Ken tells us in an interview that Shii Devil is smiling again; he can't blame her because she took a lot of "flat-out abuse" at Sook Jai at the hands of Robb and Penny. He says that Penny is now trying to figure out Shii Devil's "angle," but says, "That's Penny. What are you gonna do?" I don't think I'd like Penny very much. Actually, I don't think I'd like many of these people very much, but at least they're entertaining to watch. Penny's just a bore.

In the water, Jan has sufficiently scrubbed the blue sun around her face until her whole face has turned blue. She's having a smurfy day! Shii Devil tells her she looks like the statue of liberty, and Jan whines, "I don't wanna be the statue anymore!" Shii Devil says she can just look cold, then. Hee. Penny tells us in an interview that although they claim to be a family, they all have their "thinking caps" on. And now I like her even less for using the term "thinking caps." Penny is trying to figure out her boundaries, and where she fits in with the group.

Shii Devil then tells us that being at Chuay Gahn is "like breathing for the first time," which is a little melodramatic. She feels good to be with friends who don't judge her; she then tells a muted but still gold-tinged Ted that she was Sook Jai's odd man out from the beginning. He asks, "You don't think it's because --" and she cuts him off to say, "Race?" She thinks race is definitely a factor and that it can't be taken out of the equation, but that she doesn't think the others are racist; they just don't understand her. Ted finally gets to recite the Martin Luther King words he's been waiting to spout about not judging people by the color of their skins, but it's out of place here. I mean, it's not Shii Devil who needs the lesson. Shii Devil thinks the problem is more that she likes eating chicken organs, and she can't stand being judged because she's "culturally different." In an interview, Shii Devil tells us that everyone at Sook Jai (except Jake and Ken) did "their best to socially ostracize [her] and, uh, and basically torture [her], you know, in the worst way -- in a social way." Shii Devil feels like she's lived in a bubble for eighteen days, and now she's "damn happy" to be with the Chuay Gahns. Ted seems sincerely happy to hear this. In an interview, he says it's been very interesting since the merge. He tells us that Shii Devil approached the members of his tribe to let them know how much she appreciates their company. In response, Ted told her about the tribe's "family atmosphere," and invited her to join their family. We rejoin Ted and Shii Devil's conversation, where Ted tells her to see "that bath that [she] just took as a recleansin'." He proclaims, "Today marks the beginning of a new day." Doesn't every day mark the beginning -- or middle, or end, for that matter -- of a new day?

The S10 cook noodles by the light of the moon and loudly talk over each other. Clay says, "Damn, you all gettin' excited. Give me the wine!" Erin tells us that it's "nuts bein' over here" at Chuay Gahn, and then we see Brian and Ken debate what kind of wine it is. Ken doesn't know, and jokes that it's "a fine chardonnay." My guess is that in Brian's kingdom back home, Boone's is the wine of choice. Erin reclines as she tells us that Sook Jai always talked about how boring life at Chuay Gahn must be, and that she never expected this. She's amazed, and already feels at home. Back around the camp, Erin jokingly slurs to Ken as they pass the wine, "Are you tryin' to get me drunk so you can take advantage of me?" She gives him the hand as he responds, "You know how it is, baby." Jan drunkenly toasts something. In an interview, Brian tells us, "Jan, uh, well, Jan's, uh, a lush. And she admits it." That's the best kind of lush. Ted voice-overs, "Jannie doesn't drink....much," as we see Jan attempt to walk around the fire, and then totally wipe out. It's one of those stumbles that takes about fifteen full seconds before it's through, and it is not an easy fall. As the others exclaim and try to help, she says she just "hit the brick," so she's okay. Brian says to the group, "By the way, guys, that's Jan every night." She tells him to shut up and insist that it's not true. They don't have wine every night!

And then out of nowhere, there's singing. These people should never, ever sing. Ever. Shii Devil and Ted enthusiastically warble a blues song I don't know. You don't need to write and tell me what it is. Really, please don't. Shii Devil explains in an interview that they sang "campfire songs," in the sense that the song was sung around the campfire, but it wasn't exactly "Kumbaya." Helen bounces along and moans because she doesn't know the words, but can't admit it. Shii Devil is really proud of herself as the song concludes; she high-fives and acts exhausted by the entire singing experience. Shii Devils, in particular, should not sing the blues. She'll be singin' the blues later, but in a whole different way. Ted doesn't drink alcohol, so he's amused to watch other people get drunk. He tells us, "For me, it's always funny." Clay feels some "rock-in-roll comin'," as Ted continues voicing over that Brian took the guitar and played the worst thing Ted's ever heard. We see a blurry-eyed, slouching Brian strumming away and singing:

The way you feel about me [STRUM!]

And I'm see you here and there [STRUM!]
But at the same time [STRUM!]
I sure wish [indistinguishable fast mumble STRUM!]
But at the same time [STRUM!]
I don't really give a damn [STRUM!]

The song itself is not nearly so funny as the various expressions of the others in the group. Erin is literally slack-jawed, and Ted and Shii Devil exchange a curious, snickery look. As the song trails off, the group tries to figure out if Brian is finished so that they can clap and be done with it. And also so that they can go hide the guitar someplace really far away. And oh my lord, I just realized that Brian actually brought that guitar along. It's his luxury item. Ted says that Brian was singing about moons and girls and was a "goner." We see Brian stumbling down the beach with Ted as Clay exclaims in the background, "Brian's out of it right now. Too much wine!" As Ted guides him, Brian almost knocks Ted over and then clings to his shoulder to remain upright. Ted tells us that they walked down the beach to get Brian "some air." The end up in a cove, and Ted voice-overs that the situation reinforced this bond -- both as players and as friends. Brian drunkenly urges Ted to "watch out for NYC! Watch out for NYC!" and they agree that Ken's "out for blood." Ken's out for a million dollars, dummies. Ted is amazed that Brian, despite his total drunkenness, it still able to strategize. As we see a shot of Brian's back as he pukes, Ted says, "He has my back as much as I have his back." Brian dry heaves while Ted looks on.

Morning dawns on Day 20. Brian is up early and stumbling around the camp. Probably, he's still a little drunk. He tells us that the prior night was eventful, and then dumps some vomit-like substance from one pot into another; he swirls it around and inspects it. I know that's not really vomit, but it's gross nonetheless. Brian says, "I was talking to my good friend, Hurling Freddy," and blames the situation on "a little too much wine, too many crackers." He doesn't mind, though, because it shows the others he's "human" and "one of them." And the pathology finally reveals itself. I was waiting. Ted and Jan have also woken up, and Ted jokingly offers to get some more wine for Brian. Brian laughs if off and responds, "I feel like...I feel like Jan!" Brian tells us he has a "very subtle form of leadership. It's very low-key. It's very underhand." He says he knows exactly what's going on; although he didn't for a few hours the other night, he brags, "Most of the time I do!"

Shii Devil and Brian walk off together, as Brian voice-overs that he knows there's some "cattiness going on with the girls" of Sook Jai. He says, "We'll see if I can use [Shii Devil] as part of my kingdom." They pick up sticks as Brian says that the vote is going "towards P," which Shii Devil knows. In an interview, she tells us it was a dramatic morning, because the Chuay Gahn tribe approached her to join them in voting out Penny. Ken asked her if she was going to switch, and she explained that she was really confused and didn't know what to do. Shii Devil tells Brian that if she joins Chuay Gahn, she will betray two members of the Sook Jai tribe who trust her. Brian says that first instincts are usually the best, and she reveals that her first instinct is to vote against Penny. Still, she insists, Ken makes a good argument for staying with Sook Jai. Brian urges her to remember that she is now part of the Chuay Gahn family, and that they all love her. He says, "And you can feel it!" She is obviously flattered by the love and attention of the other tribe, and tells us in an interview that she told Chuay Gahn directly that she was on their side. She says, "I'm workin' a deal. I'm voting Penny out." As she and Brian walk off together, they agree that it's "gonna be a blast."

A black and orange spider takes a really long time to eat a little worm trapped in its web. Shii Devil tells us again that she's decided to vote for Penny. She wants to talk to Ken about it because she knows that's the "right thing to do." "Right thing[s] to do," would also include keeping her original word and not stabbing Jake and Ken in the back while screwing herself over in the process, but it's all subjective, I suppose. Shii Devil isn't sure if it's wise to reveal her plans to Ken. When Ken asks if she's figured out her voting plans, she starts to tell him, stutters for a while, then says she's "flip-flopping." He is upset because he'd defended her when everyone else accused her of being a traitor. She's gone back and forth on the decision, and he needs to know what she's going to do. In an interview, Ken tells us that she'll be considered a rat for the rest of her life if she turns on her tribe, and I think that's a little extreme. Shii Devil insists that she's confused, but Ken wants an answer. Shii Devil says, "I'm stayin' on your and Jake's side..." Ken sees this statement as promising until she adds, "But I'm not stayin' on Penny and Erin's side." And where has the "g" in "ing" gone in the English language? It's not so hard. Sesame Street needs to do a better job with these people. In any case, Ken knows Penny has to go and has already discussed it with Brian, but he wants Sook Jai to have the advantage first. In an interview, he explains that the tribes currently have even numbers; if Shii Devil votes against Penny, she's going to give Chuay Gahn the advantage "because [she's], like, a little snake. Now they're gonna invite [her] in." Ken says she's showing disloyalty, and that she will make herself an outcast on both sides by voting outside of her tribe. Again, Ken attempts to reason with Shii Devil; he knows she doesn't want Penny on the jury, but she shouldn't screw over everyone else, including herself, because she's mad at one person. He asks her to think about it and let him know. Isn't that where the conversation began? Anyway, Shii Devil tells us in an interview that she won't further discuss the situation with Ken because he used his "interrogation routine" on her, and "the policeman is comin' out." She thinks he was trying to intimidate her, and says she's willing at this point to gamble on voting out Penny and Erin and seeing what happens. If "see[ing] what happens" means "getting her ass voted out for betraying her tribe." Shii Devil walks by the tent, inside which Erin randomly rambles on to Penny and Helen about boys and their middle names.

A spiky branch. Magilla, clinging to a tree. I hope he's not clinging to a tree with spiky branches, because that would hurt. It's now Day 21. Shii Devil and Ted have fetched the treemail, which includes a "weird lock." They're really proud that they waited to be in the company of the others before reading the clue, which is all about paradise and prisons and "legends of convicts," and escaping. Helen screws up her face, and Shii Devil states, "So it's definitely for individual immunity." Jan immediately agrees, which is reason enough to doubt the conclusion. In an interview, Clay tells us that they're now combined, so that "when [they] have a challenge for immunity, [they] go as individuals." He says, "If I win tonight, I'm gon' put something around my neck. I cannot be voted for, and I cannot be kicked off at that Tribal Council." As the tribe discusses the challenge, Magilla observes them from the tree. The tribe then heads out, and Magilla seizes his big chance. As the tribe walks away, Magilla sneaks over to the basket and begins surreptitiously eating their food. They walk some more. He eats some more and looks around sneakily. Hee. Why am I not surprised that Magilla is smarter than the S10? He should get to compete in the reward challenges as well.

Shots of locks and keys greet us at the challenge. Singers howl. The S10 walk into the challenge in single file, where a visibly agitated Peachy awaits them. He reclaims the idol and says that first, he has to check in with them. He asks Erin if it was difficult to adjust to living together. She doesn't respond at first to Peachy's bait, and says it was much better "having both tribes live together." She then falls for the trap and continues, "I never would have expected our merge to have gone as smoothly as it has." And it's like she just said the "Word of the Day," but no one screams real loud and Chairry, Pterri, and Globey are nowhere in sight. Peachy says, "You said 'merge.' I certainly didn't say anything to give you that impression, did I?" Gong! Shii Devil looks around, puzzled. The others look puzzled too, but clearly Shii Devil's reaction is most important. Peachy points out that he precisely said, "two tribes will live together on the same beach," which is exactly what they've been doing. Ted acknowledges the dangers of assuming, and says he thought they were now one tribe, and that the challenge would be "more of a individual effort." Peachy states again that the challenge is between Sook Jai and Chuay Gahn, because "the two tribes never merged." Gong!

Peachy's moment of revelation having ended, he turns his attention to the challenge. He explains that the island used to be a prison, and that many escapes and escape attempts happened there. Today, the S10 will break out of a "makeshift prison." At this, the camera pans back to reveal two bamboo cages: one purple and one orange. Peachy explains that each competitor will be chained and shackled with locks that "open with a key." As locks often do. They will each have two locks on their wrists, and one lock on their ankles, accounting for fifteen locks in total for each tribe. The keys are located outside the cages on posts, and the goal is to use materials found within the jail cell -- twine and sticks, it appears -- to retrieve them. The S10 must have one foot on the ground at all times while inside the cell, and they can only retrieve one key at a time, which can only be used on one lock. Once they have released all fifteen locks, they will dig themselves out of the cage, crawl through to the front of the cage exterior, and cross the finish line. The first tribe there with fifteen keys in hand wins immunity. Peachy says, "Shall we get it on?" And I've missed his old misuse of sexual phrases.

We see the S10 fully shackled and waddling into their cages. For no other reason than the fact that they had to have been told to do so, they hang on the bars like you see in movies. I'm surprised they're not banging on the bars with pots, and enacting prison rape scenes. They continue to hop around while Peachy gleefully reports that rain is coming. He promises, "The faster you get out, the faster you get dry." As the S10 beings the key-retrieval process, Peachy narrates such pertinent remarks as, "Ken, making a play for a key," and "Brian, time to make something happen for Chuay Gahn." Luckily, we don't see every key as it's retrieved -- nor, for that matter, do we get corresponding commentary from Peachy -- although we do see that Shii Devil is working very hard. The scene goes from sunny to rainy to sunny again as the time-lapse clouds roll by. Clay urges his tribe to use their shoelaces, which Peachy thinks is "ingenuity at work!" Brian and Penny each drop a key, but only Penny mouths, "Oh, fuck." It's a very close race to the end. Penny has slid through Sook Jai's bars for better reach, and Shii Devil has as well. This challenge is biased against the fatties! Suddenly, they're tied with fourteen keys each. They both manage to drop them, but Chuay Gahn recovers its key first while Sook Jai is still struggling. Peachy tells Chuay Gahn that they can now start digging, and proclaims, "Chuay Gahn's gonna have to dig a pretty big hole for Big Ted." He tells Sook Jai that they're still in it. Chuay Gahn digs and digs; Helen's the first to attempt to slide out. She's half in and half out and it looks very uncomfortable. The others get out without event until Ted, who screams and grunts his way out of the hole. They anxiously run over to Peachy, who counts up their keys and confirms that they do indeed have fifteen. As the tribe members hug each other, Ted swipes at Clay's face. Sook Jai, still caged, looks dismayed. Peachy congratulates their effort, but reminds them that they will still have to vote someone out.

A bunch of bats huddle at the top of the cave. One by one, they fly away until a single bat remains. If this were The Mole, this clue would reveal that vampiric Helen will win. Chuay Gahn walks back from the challenge, and Clay says that Peachy's revelation was like being at a Thanksgiving dinner where someone slapped him and "Grandma in both families split and start fightin' again." Seriously, it's like he's speaking a different language. I have no idea what that means. Jan demonstrates a distinct awareness of her surroundings and situation by telling us exactly what just happened moments ago. She says they were tricked, and are still two tribes vying for immunity. The members of Chuay Gahn can't believe that Sook Jai had to go straight to Tribal Council. They agree that anything can happen after today and Ted says, "Now we got a situation where we're sleepin' with the enemy!"

The members of Sook Jai arrive at Tribal Council wearing their serious faces. Peachy narrates that tonight's vote is important because it guarantees a spot on the jury and the chance to "be in this game one way or another until the end." Peachy asks the members of the group what went through their minds when they realized that the challenge was "still tribal." Erin was shocked because she thought they would arrive at the individual immunity challenge, get new buffs, and officially merge. Peachy says that the rain coming down is "sort of a fitting end to, uh, a turbulent three days." Jake's hat blows off his head and he quickly grabs it. That man's got some reflexes. Peachy congratulates him on the catch, and Jake sweetly says he'd hate to lose the hat. Peachy asks how the tribe has been affected by the non-merge. Jake answers that they'll be down by one person now, and will have to "reorganize [their] thoughts" and go back in with "some adaptable ideas." Peachy asks if Erin "reckon[s]" that some people shared information they now regret. Erin is disappointed because she knows some members of her tribe were working with Chuay Gahn. It was "disheartening" to see people she once trusted looking out for themselves instead of for the tribe. Peachy asks how Penny will vote, because "certainly there's some strategy in this." Penny doesn't answer the question, but joins Erin in indiscreetly bashing Shii Devil: she says she learned that one of her tribe members was planning on voting Penny out , and that although she's trusted these people for the past eighteen days, in the last twenty-four hours, she's questioned that trust.

Peachy suddenly says that Tribal Council is an "open forum," and Shii Devil emphatically nods and says, "Good." Peachy senses that there's "stuff goin' on," and Shii Devil jumps in to say, "I'd like to -- I'd love to speak." She then launches into a monologue beginning with, "This is not a tribe unified. It's never been a tribe unified. As much as everyone here would like to think it was a tribe unified, this has not been...the case." And what's with the whole "tribe unified" shtick? Why not just say a "unified tribe"? In any case, Shii Devil has felt the "brunt" of the lack of unity, and doesn't think it's surprising that she found in Chuay Gahn "five people who are really lovely." She says in talking to Chuay Gahn, she's realized that the people who mistreated her at Sook Jai are the same people the other tribe distrusts most. She says that Ken was the first person Chuay Gahn asked about, and that she watched his back. She was always loyal to Jake as well. She then turns to Penny and says, "Penny, you're manipulative." Hee. Shii Devil knows it's an unpleasant word, but says it's the best way to describe the way Penny's played the game. Shii Devil thinks that if Sook Jai votes her out instead of Penny, the Chuay Gahn tribe will get a bad impression of them. Penny speaks up to say that although she's had plenty of opportunities to vote out Shii Devil, she chose not to because they needed to go into the merge as a unified tribe of five. She's very smirky. She doesn't feel like she's manipulative, and says, "No matter what Chuay Gahn thinks or says, these are the people that I need to be with." Peachy asks whether Shii Devil is making a plea or offer, and Shii Devil calls out Jake, Ken, and Erin by name. She knows they're considering voting out Shii Devil, but promises that she hadn't made any decisions yet and would have told them if she had. She says, "I've not lied to you...yet," which is kind of funny since it implies she will lie to them in the future. Penny unabashedly grins, while Erin's eyes bug out. Shii Devil requests that the others look at the full eighteen days and not just the past twenty-four hours. She insists that she's on their side and that she has maintained her promise to them. She also adds that since she's been to Chuay Gahn's camp, "I think I know more intimately where their heads are...than any of you." She should have stopped while she was ahead. ["Or, she should have said that first -- that Sook Jai could use Shii Devil's knowledge of Chuay Gahn against them." -- Wing Chun] Peachy snits that there's clearly a "bit of a cloud" hanging over the tribe, and that the big question is how that information will impact the vote. He sends them off to vote.

Shii Devil silently holds up Penny's name. No scathing commentary? Not even a proverb? Penny votes for Shii Devil: "What comes around goes around." We don't see what anyone else has to say.

As always, the decision will be final and the person voted out must leave immediately. Peachy doesn't say that person should not imitate Robb's lingering departure from last week. First, we see Penny's vote for Shii Devil, followed by Shii Devil's vote for Penny. It's suspenseful for about 2.5 seconds, before Peachy reveals that both the third and fourth votes are for Shii Devil. As she turns over her torch, Penny looks smug, and Jake looks very unhappy. Shii Devil thrusts her torch into its hole for snuffing and wishes the others good luck. Jake sadly watches Shii Devil go, while Penny continues grinning broadly. Peachy points out that the tribe will either rebound and get stronger or "fracture completely" from this point on. He tells them to think about it on the "long wet walk home."

If you get a buff, you'll be hugged by big strong guys like Robb. So don't get a buff, okay?

week on Survivor, the tribes adjust to living together, but since Ken doesn't go around pissing where he sleeps, it's a problem. And Helen -- who has some anger-management issues -- wants to kill Magilla.

As we see that it was a unanimous vote against Shii Devil (other than her own vote against Penny), she tells us that she "committed the classic error" of excessively plotting and scheming. It's been a really "humbling" and fun experience for her -- the last three days in particular. She wishes the others good luck and has no hard feelings. Then she's off to eat some chicken necks -- hopefully somewhere near Robb.