By Kim
Aaaaand, we're back! The castaways are divided up into three tribes before they even hit the beach, and their numbers include former professional baseball player Jeff Kent and Facts of Life star Lisa Whelchel. And, the surprise additions are three former cast members who had to leave the show due to injuries: Russell (who passed out during a challenge and I remember thinking was dead, so I'm glad he's okay), Jonathan Penner (who got a life-threatening infection on his second time around, so this is try number three) and the one everyone remembers, Michael Skupin, who passed out in the second season and fell in the fire. Ugh, I will never forget those images of him standing in the water with the skin from his hands just falling off. Gross.
Russell joins the blue tribe, Matsing. Penner joins the red tribe, Kalabaw (Jeff Kent's tribe). Michael joins the yellow tribe, Tandang (Lisa Whelchel's tribe). Once the returnees are introduced and assigned a tribe, Probst tells them to grab supplies and hop on a raft. It's fairly chaotic and the rafts are not big, but they all manage to grab a few things and head to their camps. Jeff Kent twists his knee in the process.
Russell immediately tells his tribe that he doesn't want to be their leader, but then gets busy telling everyone else what to do. The two young pretty people, Marcus and Angie (I think?) are a little annoyed by Russell but understand the value of letting him hang himself out to dry.
The people on Penner's tribe all agree that they should ditch him fairly early, but we'll see if they follow through. One of them immediately recognizes Jeff Kent but doesn't say anything yet. Penner starts searching for an Immunity Idol right away, which pisses off his tribe, but given how they plan on getting rid of him immediately, maybe he shouldn't care. He finds the first clue immediately.
Skupin's tribemates immediately form an alliance of four (Abi, Pete, Skupin, and RC). Let's not forget that alliances formed early have been really important in the past few seasons, especially last season. They want to get rid of Lisa Whelchel. Skupin immediately recognizes Lisa but doesn't say anything. Everyone else seems to be too young, I guess? Although she's been on television recently between the books she's written and her Christian ministry stuff. She is a Survivor superfan, too. Skupin kind of can't believe that his alliance-mates don't know who Lisa is, and he urges her to tell people because everyone wants to get rid of her. But she doesn't think it's prudent yet. Skupin's tribe is also concerned because Skupin has maybe four pretty serious cuts early on.
Back on Russell's tribe, things are crazy. Zane goes around and makes individual alliances with each of the women, then makes a three-man alliance with Malcolm and Russell and says that he can pull in any of the women if needed. Malcolm thinks that's shady, so HE makes an alliance with the older woman, Denise. I need a flow chart to track all the alliances on this tribe and it's still the first day, I think. Russell finds the immunity clue first, but Zane spots him trying to read it and Russell lies about it.
The first immunity challenge is a relay race run in pairs, tied together. The first pair runs into the jungle and finds paddles. The second pair paddles out and finds a chest, and brings it back to shore. The third pair opens the chest and assembles a puzzle. First place gets immunity and a firemaking kit. Second place gets immunity and flint. Third places had to vote someone out.
Have I mentioned how happy I am that this season takes place on water and we get to see swimming and paddling challenges again? I'm really happy. The yellow team (Skupin's tribe) leads the whole way. The red team (Penner's tribe) falls behind after the first leg but makes up ground on the second leg, leaving the blue team (Russell's tribe) in last place for puzzle assembly. Red and yellow battle it out, but red finishes the puzzle seconds ahead of yellow. Lisa seems to do a great job with the puzzle for yellow, which may have helped her standing. Russell was the one who chose roles for his team, and people ended up in roles they didn't want, so they blame him for the loss.
After the challenge, Russell tries to give everyone a pep talk but Zane cuts him off and says, "I suck and you should vote me off." This is a strategy somehow? Russell mansplains to all of the women that they should vote Zane off, which only annoys them more. Angie begs Zane to stay, and so does Malcolm. They think Russell has an idol, though. Whether it's for that reason, or because Zane basically volunteered to go, the tribe votes off Zane and he's the first to leave.