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So, anyway. Blackwater Ridge, Lost Creek, Colorado. Monster's-eye view, growling and creeping around outside two cozy-looking dome tents. Inside the tent, two guys play Game Boys against one another. In the other tent, another guy uses his Treo -- this is one lamely high-tech campout -- to record a video of himself saying, "Hey Hailey, day six, we're still out near Blackwater, we're fine, keeping safe, so don't worry, talk to you tomorrow." Back in the other tent, one of the dudes heads out of the tent to take a whizz, sets up near a tree, and starts noticing rustling and mysterious tree-branch swaying, before letting out the expected "ARRRRGHHH!" Cut to his friends in their tents looking concerned and calling out to him. Nintendo Buddy sticks his head out of his tent first and we see him get pulled headfirst into the air, screaming as he goes, total Greg Grunberg style. Treo Geek shits his pants and douses his lamp while something circles his tent and growls and circles and growls. And then circles and growls some more. Until it finally rips through the tent for its tasty morsel. This last kid was wearing an honest-to-God shell necklace, and so I'm sure after his untimely demise was either sent immediately to hell or on a casting call for The Real World TGI Fridays.
Palo Alto. Sam brings a tasteful bouquet to the late Joey Potter's grave. He quickly explains the unusually nice flowers by pretending like he hadn't recently taken a flower arranging course and addressing the grave, "You always said roses were lame, so I, uh, brought you, uh." He focuses in on the glamour shot adorning the headstone, and loses his composure: "Jess. I should have protected you. I should have told you the truth." He kneels to place the flowers on the grave, and a dirty arm shoots out of the grave and grabs onto him. Shit, that fucking got me! As the viewer jumps a bit, we cut to Sam jolting awake in the passenger seat of the Metallicar. Foreigner's "Hot Blooded" plays in the background. Nice. Hot blooded! Chicken of the sea! Gotta fever of a hundred and three!
Dean looks over and asks Sam if he had "another nightmare" and then asks him if he wants to drive. Sam is surprised: "Dean, your whole life you've never once asked me that. Look, man, you're worried about me. I get it, and thank you, but I'm perfectly okay." Dean doesn't buy it. Sam grabs a map and asks where they are. Dean tells him they're just outside of Grand Junction. That is in Colorado, and I drove through there with Ed once on the way from Chicago to San Francisco and got caught in traffic because for some reason the highway gets routed through city streets for a few miles there. While in traffic, I looked over and saw what to my eyes was a horrifyingly deformed person who had legs for arms and was flapping them against the passenger-side back window. I stayed very quiet because I didn't think I could point this out to Ed without sounding like a person who is prejudiced against people who have legs for arms, and this is before we were even engaged, let alone married, so I didn't want to lose him over this admittedly controversial issue. Then I realized that the arms that I thought were legs were actually the (arm) arms of the person in the front seat who was reclining and reaching back toward the person in the back seat, and that somehow this made it look like the person in the back seat had legs for arms. Yeah, I don't know either. The end. You think that was a boring and weird story, wait until you sit through the rest of this recap.