By Pamie
I can't even tell you how happy I am that I'm finally recapping this episode of The Sopranos. It contains my favorite line ever uttered on HBO. You'll know it when you see it.
A Zanone Brothers garbage truck pulls into the parking lot of a small business. The back opens, and the trunk dumps tons of garbage in front of the building. It's all rotten food. The owner runs out and screams for them to stop. He calls them all kinds of bad names. The sanitation workers don't stop. In fact, they dump even more. "Where do you suppose you are going?" the owner shouts. His English is fragmented, and he shouts things like, "I demand you to come back here this instant! This instant!" The truck drives off as the owner shouts down the street, "Motherfuckers! Motherfuckers!" So, his English isn't entirely broken.
A guy answers the phone, "Yeah. Zanone Brothers." Richie walks into the room at the same time, asking, "How 'bout them Nets?" The guy on the phone -- Bobby Zanone, I think -- is talking to the man with the all of the garbage. The garbage guy is complaining that the driver came over and dumped all of the garbage in front of his building. Bobby explains that it's company policy that if the customer is unhappy he gets double his garbage back, free. Bobby tells Richie that it's "the raghead from the deli" on the phone, so Richie takes the phone. Richie explains the policy. The garbage guy says he complained because the driver hasn't been making full pick-ups over the past few weeks and he got charged double for it. Richie says they had to come out twice to get all of the garbage. This is all because Tony told Richie to start charging double for pick-ups. Richie tells the guy he figured he wasn't satisfied, so he wanted his garbage back. Garbage Guy says he didn't want his garbage back. Richie says that must mean he's satisfied. "You are speaking shit to me," the man pouts into his cell phone. Richie says they'll send another truck out tomorrow, and hangs up the phone.
Neil Mink -- that's Tony's lawyer's name, right? Mink is on the phone in his office negotiating someone's sentence when Tony shows up. Tony brings a box of champagne, and Mink returns the duffel bag of cash from last week. Mink asks how everyone's doing. They make small talk about Carmela, the kids, the job. Tony asks what he owes him. Mink says Tony can pay him when he actually has to do something, which almost happened this past week. Tony announces the upcoming "Neil Mink Lecture Series." Neil tells Tony that very bad things almost happened, and that Tony should consider laying low for a while. He should take an office at Barone Sanitation and look like an honest man making an honest living for a while. "Insulate yourself from these shenanigans," he tells Tony. He says the feds have spent millions of tax dollars watching Tony's every move, and eventually they're going to want a return on their investment. Tony says he understands.
Junior's back at the hospital, cursing in pain. His doctor tells him he's going to feel a little tender where they inserted the stent. Bobby Bacala tells Junior that he should just use the bedpan time so he doesn't have to go through all of this pain. "I'm not a cat," Junior says. "I don't shit in a box." They tell him to take it easy on his heart. Junior flirts with the nurse, telling her that when he gets out, he's going to take her to the "discotheque." The nurse laughs at the use of the ancient word "discotheque." Bobby makes eyebrows towards the man that has just walked in. He's Michael McLuhan from the U.S. Marshal's Service. He's there to install his lo-jack again. Junior: "They give you the important jobs, huh?" The nurse asks if his name is really Marshal McLuhan. Marshal McLuhan, who's heard that joke 8.2 million times, calmly says that it is. I quickly search the Internet, and wonder briefly if I'm going to get fired because I didn't know who Marshall McLuhan is. Apparently he revolutionized media in Canada. Should I have known that? ["He's the guy who said, 'The medium is the message.' You should probably remember that if you ever go on Jeopardy!." -- Sars] I'm a bad Pop Culturist sometimes. Just ask me the words to Mr. Mister's "Broken Wings." I've got them all down pat. I guess I have them stored in my Marshall McLuhan section. Junior then makes me feel better by asking, "What's the fucking joke?" There's a woman in a wheelchair at the door, staring into the room, as the doctor tells Junior to take it easy so there's less pressure on his heart. Junior gets to go home tomorrow. "Lucky fucking me," he says. Everyone leaves except for Bobby, who asks, "Sandwich or something?" Junior replies, "Did you hear me with my fucking balls? Who could fucking eat?" Poor Bobby. He sees the woman in the wheelchair and shuts the door in her face.
Tony stands at the window, listening to the classic rock station. Carmela walks into the living room and asks him what he's looking at. Tony says he's just looking out the window. Carm leaves to get her eyebrows done. The classic rock tells us that "It may be the devil or it may be the Lord / But you're gonna have to serve somebody." I hate when I get my classic rock served heavy-handed.
Tony walks into the kitchen and grabs a snack out of the refrigerator. The music stays just as loud as he sits down and eats a Popsicle. Tony flips through a magazine to read the headlines. Landfill dispute, garbage problems, blah, blah, blah. Tony's done skimming; he gets up and walks out of the kitchen.
Melfi's finishing a couple's session by telling the husband and wife: "Remember. One mouth, two ears. Listen to each other." The man and woman walk off unhappily together. Melfi checks her day planner and sees her 2:00 appointment is with "T.S." She walks over to a desk and pulls out a glass and a bottle of vodka, I think. It's a white bottle with a picture of a tree on it. Not white, but like hazy glass. Semi-transparent. Wow. Nobody cares. Sorry. She pours herself a tall glass of booze. She chugs, wipes her mouth, and looks guilty.
It's two. Tony's there. Melfi's boozy. She starts the session: "So, what's up?" Tony says he's bored. He doesn't want to come there anymore. "Wow," Jennifer says. "That's the first time we've heard you say that." They stare at each other for a little while. Tony says this is feeling like a waste of time. Melfi disagrees. Tony says he was watching a movie the other day with Brad Pitt and "that blonde, Gwyneth Paltrow." "Sliding Doors?" Melfi asks. "Fuck no, Seven," Tony responds. Heh. He says it's a good movie, but halfway through, he thought, "This is bullshit." Finding out who the killer is won't make a bit of difference in his life. He shouldn't care who the killer is. So he turned off the television. Melfi congratulates him and asks what he did instead. "Went out in the yard and burned ants with a magnifying glass," he says. Melfi just stares, and Tony asks where's her sense of humor. She continues to stare until Tony asks, "What's the matter? You still in mourning over the coming of managed care?" Melfi flops her hand forward and says, "Go on." Tony says that everything in life is a series of distractions until you die. "I hear depression talking," Melfi says drunkenly. I hear his mother talking, but who asked me. Tony says that he's tired of all the medication. Melfi says that some people take pleasure in the simple doing of things. Tony says he can't do the things he takes pleasure in. He's trying to change his "business profile." Melfi smarms that this is all about his "legal problems." Tony pouts for a while. Melfi sighs.
Junior's getting wheeled out of the hospital. Bobby leaves to get the car. "Corrado? I thought that was you." It's the woman in the wheelchair that was staring at Junior the day before. Her name is Catherine Romano. Junior recognizes her and stands up to greet her. The nurse tells Junior he has to stay in the wheelchair until he leaves the hospital. He tells her to call a cop. Catherine and Junior went to high school together. Catherine points out her son behind her. "Little Chuckie," she calls him. He's a grown man now. Junior smiles and remembers that Chuckie used to ride the bike for the butchers. Chuckie gives Junior a look and says he needs to make a phone call. He walks away. Catherine says that Chuckie is a cop now. "Like his father." A detective. Catherine's husband died of Hodgkin's fifteen years ago. "The week the shuttle exploded," she says. She says the pension and the grandchildren help. She tells Junior he looks good. She asks if he's healthy. He says he's got a little trouble, but nothing much. He sees her foot and asks if she broke her ankle. "Bunions," she says. They chat about where they live. They're still in their same places. She lives by their old school. She says they should have coffee sometime at the nearby IHOP. Junior lies that he's not supposed to leave the house because of "stress." A very large orderly then walks up and menaces Junior back into his wheelchair. Junior slowly sits back down.
At Barone Sanitation, a very large, very angry dog barks and snaps at the air for the longest establishing shot in the history of The Sopranos, reinstalling my fear of dogs.
Tony gets escorted back to his office. It's filled with boxes. Tony says, "What the fuck, I don't show up for eight years, you turn my office into a store room?" He boxes the other guy on the arm to show he was kidding. I guess he's Dick Barone? I'm guessing. Dick says he'll get everything cleaned up. He calls in Connie, a tiny blonde woman who Tony will no doubt fuck the shit out of later. He introduces her to Tony. He tells Connie that Tony's going to be working there for a while, so he needs his office cleaned out. Connie decides to move everything to near the copy machine. I don't know why we need to know that. Connie leaves, and Tony compliments her tits. Dick tells Tony that Connie's a born-again Christian. Tony loves a challenge. Dick says that there's a little problem with Richie. Tony says he knows about Richie dumping the garbage on the deli. Dick says that's not it. One of the Zanone drivers, "The Illustrated Man," he's selling blow along the routes. Dick says he can handle the Department of Sanitation, but if the DEA gets involved, they'll lose their 901. Tony says, "Son of a fucking bitch." Dick says he hates to break Tony's balls. Tony says, "You know that piece of shit's gonna be my brother-in-law? Nice, huh?"
"The RICO Act, Elliot," Melfi says while wringing her hands. "We sat there and we talked about the fucking RICO Act." That's the Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act of 1994, by the way. Yes, I looked it up for you. No, you don't have to thank me. It enables persons financially injured by a pattern of criminal activity to seek redress through the state or federal courts. Elliot tells Jennifer that she treats different patients differently. She says that two years ago she thought RICO was a relative of his. Heh. She keeps wringing her hands until Elliot points it out. He asks how her drinking is going. She says it's worse. He asks if she's an alcoholic. She admits she's drinking between sessions, but only on the days she sees Tony. "I can't take it," she says. Elliot thanks her for finally admitting it, and asks if she's taking steps to stop seeing Tony. She says that he didn't want to come anymore, but she talked him out of it. She says it's like watching a train wreck. She can't stop listening to what he might say to her.
A nurse puts a breathing mask on Junior. She's pretty and blonde and in his house. Bobby watches from the back of the room. The nurse tells Junior that it's going to keep his airways clear while he's sleeping. Junior says he doesn't snore. The nurse tells him to not be embarrassed. She says that obstructive sleep apnea is very dangerous, and that it's a good thing he has this machine. Junior says it makes him look like a sick man. The nurse calmly says he's not sick, but that Junior's been getting up to forty arousals per hour. Junior jokes that he's been getting many more since she showed up. The nurse plays along, explaining that she meant a different kind of arousal. "You are such a flirt!" she teases. She says she'll stop by tomorrow to check on him. The doorbell rings. Bobby asks who it is. "Judge Crater," Junior says. "How should I know?" "The one who ordered the house arrest?" a confused Bobby responds. Junior says it was just an expression, and tells him to go open the door. The nurse leaves to wash her hands. Junior can hear it's Catherine at the door. "Fuck me," he says as he hides the breathing apparatus behind him. Catherine walks in on crutches as Junior says this is a surprise. Catherine says she would have called, but he's unlisted. She's brought some manicotti. Bobby takes it to the kitchen. They chat about their conditions until Catherine sees the nurse walk back in. Junior says that the nurse just got there and they're about to have his examination. Catherine says she might come back on Friday, then. She leaves. The nurse whispers, "You're awful." Junior says that she's a neighbor lady, and went to school with his older brother. The nurse laughs and says she'll see him tomorrow. Junior smiles and watches her leave. Bobby comes back in and asks why he sent Catherine away. "I thought you were bored," he says. Junior says talking to that woman wouldn't have helped. He says they have nothing in common. "Bunion. You know how I feel about feet," Junior concludes.
The Garden State Carting Association is having a rocking 13th Annual "Couples Invitational." The clubhouse is a-rocking with an amazing amount of white shorts and sweaters tied around shoulders. Couples dance to "Disco Inferno." Carmela and Helen Barone gossip about other women at the party while Tony listens to Dick Barone babble on about business. Tony's bored. Richie shows up. He asks to be introduced to Helen. Janice walks up to Tony and talks about how great the place is. Janice is wearing a woman's golfing outfit that's so red and so tacky that I want to look away. Tony teases Janice about being completely transformed. She calls him a giant asshole. Tony walks over to Richie and asks if he has a minute. Richie gets creepy and says he'd like to get a drink first. Tony grabs Richie by the neck and says they'll catch a waiter. He pulls him away. Carm introduces Janice to Helen.
Over by a window, Tony asks Richie if he has any blow. Richie plays dumb and laughs. Tony asks if he can only score if he goes to the deli in Nutley. He tells Richie not to sell that shit on his routes. Richie says he's working with Junior on this. "I don't give a shit if you're working with Wal-Mart," Tony says. "Knock it the fuck off." Richie says they're saving for a house; if he can't expand, he can't make enough money to treat Janice right. Tony says the cops are finally leaving garbage alone after five years. If the DEA gets involved, they're fucked. "It's only coke," Richie says. Tony says that if Junior and Richie want to deal drugs, it's their business. But if they do it on the routes, then it's Tony's business. "It stops today, you got it?" Here it comes. Richie just stands there, breathing, staring at Tony. Tony says, "Don't give me your fucking Manson lamps." Brilliant! Hysterical! When I first saw this episode, I rewound to make sure that's what he really said. It has become a part of our vernacular now. "Manson lamps." I love it. Tony tells Richie not to tip a truck on a problem customer. He says he fucking hates having to fucking deal with him, and he hates the way Richie makes him feel. He tells him to get the fuck out of there. Richie finally stops staring, smirks, and walks off. "More Than A Feeling" starts piping in all loud as Tony watches people dance. They get blurry. Tony starts snorting and twitching. He has a panic attack and passes out. Janice and Carmela run over to him, screaming for an ambulance.
Hospital. Carm says they pay a fortune in therapy: "What is she doing for you?" Tony asks Carm to leave him alone. He's broken out in a rash on his arm. The doctor walks in and says that the tests are all normal. Nothing physical. Tony asks what the fuck is wrong with him. The doctor says she'd think he'd be relieved. Tony says he'll be relieved "when someone puts a finger on whatever the fuck is wrong with [him]." Carm tells the doctor she knows she's only trying to help, but it's frustrating. The doctor gives Tony a once-over and tells him that losing some weight wouldn't help. She leaves, all smirky and satisfied.
Junior washes a plate. He's out of detergent. He washes it with a sponge and puts it in the drainer. He turns on the disposal, and it makes bad noises. He turns off the disposal and puts his hand in the drain, making me nervous that the disposal is going to chop his hand to bits for the thirty seconds. Bobby shows up. Junior asks if he got the ladyfingers. Bobby didn't. I'm terrified that Bobby's going to somehow trigger the disposal. They argue about the broken disposal for a while. Bobby says he'll get someone to fix it. Junior asks who was at the door. It was Catherine; Bobby told her Junior was sleeping. Jun asks if Roberta called back. Bobby says that when he ran into Roberta at Fountains of Wayne, she was cold to him. Junior asks what Roberta was buying. It was a fountain of "kids pissing." Junior concludes that Roberta must have bought a new house. He laments about her nice ass and how great she is. Bobby leaves to take his kid to karate. Junior puts his hand back into the drain and realizes that it's stuck just as Bobby leaves.
Pan up from Frank McCourt's 'Tis to Carmela and her book club ladies. Carm echoes my opinion by saying that 'Tis is nowhere near as good as Angela's Ashes. By that I mean Angela's Ashes was good, and 'Tis made me throw the book across the room halfway through. I did. I threw it as hard as I could. Angie also agrees with me that we have no sympathy for this boozehound. Tony walks down as the women say that they have no idea what poverty is like in this country. Did I tell you guys that I got laid off twice in one day this week? I did. I'm all on the dole now, y'all. Me and me da are gonna try and score a potato to feed the weakness. Tony gets some food out of the fridge. He's storming around as the phone rings. It's Silvio. He says a shipment came in, and it's full of WWII memorabilia. Pussy's dressed in a German outfit, bitching about Nazis. Silvio says he's looking at the History Channel. He tells Tony to come down and play with everything. Tony moans that he really can't and should listen to his lawyer. Tony's listening to everyone goof off in the background, and you can tell that Tony is so upset that he's been grounded. He tells the boys he can't come out and play. Tony hangs up, pouts, listens to Carm having fun with her friends, and angrily eats his cold cut.
Melfi's at dinner with her son. She tries to make small talk about his classes, but she's off by a semester. Melfi's son Jason is so smug and pouty. I dislike him. Even though he's kinda cute. Melfi starts coughing because there's a woman smoking at the table to her. Melfi's already a little drunk, making stupid jokes to her son. He calls her "my droll mom." Melfi turns to Smoking Woman and says, "Excuse me, could you move your cigarette?" Smoking Woman turns and says, "Pardon me?" Melfi says the smoke is blowing into her son's face. "We're allowed to smoke," Smoking Woman says as she turns back to her companion. Melfi says it's an area where New Jersey is "woefully behind." She asks Smoking Woman to move the cigarette again, and Melfi's son says it's no big deal. Melfi says it's no big deal to move it, either. Smoking Woman: "I don't think so." Melfi: "I'm sorry?" SW: "I'm not gonna move it." Melfi: "Why not?" SW: "Because you're very rude." Smoking Woman sounds like Lili Taylor. Melfi says she was being polite in asking. Smoking Woman says she doesn't like Melfi's tone. Melfi says the cigarette is a health hazard. "Move it," she says. She says that she's a physician. She asks Smoking Woman if she knows what she's doing to the rest of them. She says that her son has gone to the trouble of living in a smoke-free dorm. "My salutations," Smoking Woman says. "This isn't a smoke-free restaurant." Melfi says, "Look, this is ridiculous. Could you just move the fucking thing?" "Not when you talk like that," Smoking Woman replies. Melfi's son tries to get her to stop. Melfi and Smoking Woman go back and forth some more about moving the cigarette until Melfi throws her napkin and hits Smoking Woman in the face. It's very funny. Smoking Woman stands up, calls Melfi a bitch, and lunges towards her. Everyone is standing, trying to stop the fight. The manager tries to get everyone to calm down. There is a discussion of calling the police until the manager tells Melfi to leave. Jason says he's "out of there," and leaves. Melfi drops some bills on the table and quietly leaves also.
Junior's hand is still stuck in his drain. It's nighttime and dark in his kitchen. He can't reach a light switch. He can't reach the phone. He's upset. Finally, there's noise in the house. Richie and Janice have shown up with groceries. They see Junior stuck in the drain and start giggling. Janice says it's a good thing she's nice or she'd start tickling him. Junior says he's been there six hours. He tells Richie to get the detergent and lubricate his wrist. Janice asks why he didn't call a plumber. "With what? My fucking toes?" Junior screams. Richie gets Junior to calm down so he can get his hand out of the drain. Junior finally calms down, and his hand is released. He whines and moans over to the table and sits. Janice pats his shoulder and tells him to take it easy. She asks if Junior's coming to the engagement party. She says she'll make some coffee. Richie pulls out a wad of cash. "It's light," Junior says. Richie says it's Tony's fault, because they can't sell coke on the route anymore. "I guess nobody should eat but him," Richie says. Junior's pissed, wondering how Tony can get away with this. Richie jokes about Tony's seizures and says he doesn't say anything because he knows Tony's family. "I don't want to say anything disparaging."
Tony's doodling on a notepad in his office, listening to Dick Barone on the phone. There's nothing for Tony to do, so he grabs a ruler and starts scratching the rash on his arm furiously. It starts to bleed as Connie walks in and asks if he needs coffee. Tony says he'll be going home soon. Connie looks upset at the blood.
Melfi tells Elliot that she embarrassed her son. Elliot asks if Jennifer's going to check into a 12-step program. Jennifer says she's not an alcoholic. She's got therapy to fix herself. She says she won't drink around Jason anymore. Elliot remarks that Melfi's in the bargaining stage already. She says she'll go to a meeting. Elliot says he's prescribing Luvox. Melfi says that that's for OCD. Elliot says it's good for other compulsions as well. He says that Melfi's unable to bring Tony's sessions to a conclusion. Jennifer says she really thinks he's not ready. Elliot says that Melfi is obsessed with Tony. She trembles and says, "Luvox. Jesus Christ."
Junior is in the doctor's office, telling Tony that the coke helps with the medical bills. Tony tells him to keep the coke away from the garbage route, and says he knows Jun's got plenty of money. They argue over who's in charge of the business. Junior says that, back in the fifties, everybody worked together. Tony says that Albert Anastasia looked really amicable lying on the barber shop floor. Junior says he's just saying. The doctor enters. Junior asks why the nurse never came back. He sent her a bottle of Shalimar. The doctor puts the face mask back on Junior's head. He says the stent was a complete success. "How many Migs you shoot down last week?" Tony asks Junior. Hee. The face mask does look like Junior's about to follow Iceman right into the Danger Zone.
Junior's refrigerator. The manicott' is gone. Bobby ate it. Junior yells at Bobby for eating it. Bobby says it's not his fault Junior's hand got caught: "Why you got to be so nasty?" Bobby walks away, and Junior sees that Bobby washed the dishes while he was done. Junior goes over to the phone and calls information. He wants the number for Catherine Romano. He calls the information recording a cocksucker.
Tony's seeing a doctor for the rash on his arm. The doctor says it might be brought on by stress. Tony's unhappy about this diagnosis. The doctor prescribes some cortisone. He says it might be an irritant in the air at the sanitation station. The doctor says he knows Tony's seeing a therapist, and he might want to discuss stress management.
Cut to Tony fucking the hell out of Connie at his desk while the phone rings. She's in his lap, tossing everything off the desk as the phone keeps ringing and the dog barks outside. There you go.
Junior sits with Catherine in his kitchen. She says she was surprised to hear from him. She stopped by the other day, but he was out. She says it was strange because she thought she heard him yelling inside the dark house. They sip coffee. Catherine asks Junior if her husband was ever "on the take." She says she finds wads of cash sometimes, hidden in places. Junior says that her husband probably won it all at the track. Catherine looks hopeful. "You think so?" Junior says somebody has to win.
Carm and Tony walk through an empty house. It's huge. Carm tells Tony to take more of an interest in Janice's potential new house. Tony says he's there, isn't he? Janice and Richie show up all laughing and joking about how Janice got them lost. Janice thinks the house is great, and if they have kids it'll be perfect. Janice and Carmela run off to look at the kitchen, leaving Tony and Richie to stare at each other. Tony says he talked to Junior. Richie says he knows. Tony makes sure they're clear on the drug shit. He wants to know how Richie plans on paying for the house. Richie starts bragging about how his house is better than Tony's house. The walls, the paint, the lawn -- all are better than Tony's house. Tony starts getting panicky; he tells Carm that he doesn't feel well, and he's going to leave. Carm feels his forehead and says he's all clammy. She starts to leave with him, but Tony tells her to stay with Richie and Janice.
Tony makes it outside the house and starts panting. He's twitching and gasping. He sees Richie wave and smile from the window. "Oh, you poor bastard," Tony says, and walks off.
Dick Barone walks into Tony's office. Tony's drawing a chart for a basketball pool for the office. Dick says that they got Richie's driver on video selling three ounces of coke at an arcade. Tony says he talked to Richie. Dick says this was last night. Tony says he'll have to torch a truck. He says he knows Dick doesn't want to hear that, and he sure as shit didn't say it. Tony keeps drawing and tells Dick he's working on the basketball pool. Dick walks out as Tony grabs some Liquid Paper for his chart.
Junior pours himself some tea as the phone rings. It's Livia. Junior tells her not to call him at home. Livia says she wanted to see how he was feeling. He says he's fine. "It's not easy being abandoned, is it?" she asks. She tells him she had a stroke. Junior says he knows. He doesn't live in Oshkosh. Livia says she heard Junior's been keeping company with Catherine Romano. "Oh, she's so sweet," Livia teases. She says that her husband told her Catherine's a slut. She let everyone feel her up back in the day. Junior tells Livia what she doesn't know could fill a book, and hangs up on her.
Junior walks over to Catherine and hands her a cup of tea. Catherine asks if everything is okay. "My brother's wife," Junior explains. "Oh, Livia," Catherine says. "How is she? I heard she wasn't well." "She never was," Junior responds. Catherine says that Livia's life is very sad. Junior talks about the homemade wine they're drinking. He offers to make them some lunch. Catherine says they could just go down to the Friendly's. Junior admits that he's under house arrest. She asks if the lo-jack hurts. "It beeps," he replies. "The choices we make, huh?" she says. Junior says he gets special permission for some things, but mostly he has to stay in the house. He says he understands if she wants to leave. Catherine says she enjoys him. She always did. She tells him to stay there and she'll get some food for them.
Tony's at therapy, bitching about his rash. He says the other day on the History Channel, he learned that the US is the only country where the pursuit of happiness is guaranteed in writing. He asks where his happiness is. Melfi says it's only the pursuit that's guaranteed. Tony says there's always a loophole. He asks what's the matter with her. She says they should talk about him instead. He says it seems like she's on drugs, and he's boring the shit out of himself. Melfi asks if Tony knows why a shark has to keep moving. Tony does. They can't breathe if they stop moving, or they'll die. Melfi says there's a condition called alexithymia, common in certain personalities. "The individual craves almost ceaseless action which enables them to avoid acknowledging the abhorrent things they do." Tony asks what kind of personalities. "Antisocial personalities," Melfi says. Tony says that Richie ran over a guy for no reason, paralyzing him. He asks what happens when these antisocial personalities aren't distracted from the "horrible shit" they do. Melfi says they have time to think about their behavior, how what they do affects other people. "And they crash," she finishes.
Junior falls asleep in front of the television. He snores loudly. Catherine stands up, grabs his breathing gear, and puts it over his head. Junior protests, but she tells him to just wear it. She kisses the top of his head and turns the machine on. Junior's quietly sleeping, and Catherine goes back to Diagnosis Murder.
Paulie cooks pasta. Pussy and Furio look at porn. Christopher plays cards. Tony walks in. Everyone's happy to see him again. Christopher's achy, and asks Tony to take it easy on the hugs. Tony asks for an update. They're thinking about hitting up something for some tech stuff. "Hesh knows a guy." Tony asks what else is going on. "Nothing," they say. Tony sits down and starts polishing his shoes with an electric polisher. Back at the stove, Paulie tells Silvio he's having a lot of luck with Swiss Basics Moisturizing Formula. Tony takes the polisher and applies it to his rash. Christopher wins his game of cards. There's a crash outside. Everyone jumps up and runs outside.
It's a car accident. Carmine apparently speeds often. Tony sends Silvio to bitch him out for speeding in the neighborhood. They argue as Tony sits with Paulie at the table outside. Tony lights a cigar, and Paulie starts tanning. Agent Harris shows up to introduce Tony to his new partner, Joe Marquez. Tony jokes that there weren't any openings at the post office. Harris and Tony small-talk, and eventually discuss the car accident. Pan back as everyone and everything's back to normal.