Life or Death

S03E08

The SAMCRO boys somehow have bikes waiting for them when they show up in Ireland. They join up with McGee and are quickly picked up by some aggressive Northern Ireland cops. Luckily, Gemma's there to show us who's always the ballsiest on this show, in any country, by running the cops off the road and freeing her men. Turns out the cops were paid off to detain the gang, and it's looking a lot like the work of Jimmy. With a few threats to the well-being of the cops' families, they're on their way to join the hooting and hollering Ireland Sons. They also find Maureen, who fills them in on Abel's whereabouts, but tells Jax he has to just sit and wait for Father Kellan. Gemma meets Trinity, and knows immediately that it's true she's John's. Maureen urges Gemma to keep this shit buried, since the truth will only hurt and distract Jax right now. But Jax has plenty of hurt and distractions, especially when the car he, Chibs, Fiona, Kerianne and Trinity are in gets all shot up while taking Chibs' boys back to the priest. The Sons know it was just a message and that they'd be dead if that had been the intent.

Jax and the gang work off the aggression in a boxing bout, where there's lots of brother-sister flirting going on between Jax and Trinity. For some reason, Gemma hauls Clay off to bed instead of intervening. Fortunately, Kellan shows up and sets up a meeting with Jax at St. Matt's, and tells Trinity to put her mom to bed. Later, Bobby Elvis tells Gemma how much happier Clay is when she's around, and she sadly tells Bobby Elvis he's going to have to take care of Clay when she's not around. She asks him not to go to the scary place, so they have a sad hug instead, and then Clay sends her air kisses. When Jax meets Kellan, he will only tell him that Abel's safe and far from Belfast, because he wasn't safe near Jimmy. He tells Jax in the utmost confidence that Jimmy wants the IRA to end its relationship with the Sons for his own benefit and profit, but Kellan (speaking on behalf of the IRA) wants Jax to kill Jimmy before they give his son back. That way, it won't look like the Army's killing one of their own, but like a distraught father, since Jimmy took Abel and lied about it to have leverage over the Charming Sons. Kellan promises Abel will go home in the arms of his loving family if Jax kills Jimmy. You have to wonder if he means Jax or the new Catholic family holding Abel as the episode closes.

Back in Charming, Tara bails Tig out of jail. Bad news, though: His license has been taken away. And, what's a Son of Anarchy without the ability to ride his hog? So he's stuck shotgun with Kozik, and we get a little backstory into why Tig hates Kozik so much. Surprise, surprise, it has a little something to do with a lady. Also, Lyla and Tara bond over what a bitch Ima is; then Lyla asks where she can get an abortion without creating a paper trail. Oh, and Opie doesn't know, but this isn't Lyla's first rodeo. When Tara asks her boss where her "friend" might go to get an abortion anonymously, she gives her a location and then assumes the friend is Tara. She tells her if that's true, she'd tell her she's doing the right thing. Tara takes Lyla to the abortion clinic, where they have a heart-to-heart before Lyla's called back: "Sarah Palin?" Tara makes herself an appointment, too.

Darby and Jacob do some dirty dealing in Jacob's attempt to buy the gym that is apparently key to all of his power. But Lumpy Feldstein (or "Lump," as the boys like to call him) calls in Tig and Kozik to assist. Jacob, meanwhile, bails out and enlists the help of Calaveras Hector. That pits Hector against a Prospect guarding Lumpy's place, which isn't much of a fight as the Prospect just hides while Hector shoots the place up, then bashes Lumpy in the head with a "Tell Sons no one messes with the Mayans." And, with that one lie, the gang war is so on. Stupid Prospect doesn't even call for help for Lumpy; he just takes off with his tail between his legs, leaving his weapon and jacket behind.

What is it about special international episodes that makes it impossible for them to ever be as good as a regular-old episode of a given show? And why does a good show insist on changing it up like this anyway? And it's nothing against Ireland. I love Ireland. I'm just not sure Ireland and this show mix particularly well. And why go to all that trouble of creating a fictional town only to send your characters out into the real world where they don't belong. Anyway, that's where we are for now: Ireland. So we might as well enjoy it. First up, then, is that episode title, Lochan Mor. I couldn't figure out in the context of the episode what exactly it meant, so I went to Google. A lochan seems to be a small lake or sea inlet and mor seems to mean big. Because I think "big little lake" doesn't make sense, I'm going to assume it means "big pond." As in, SAMCRO is a small fish in Ireland's big pond (as opposed to the big fish they are in the little pond of charming). So, okay, let's actually start the episode.

The episode opens with beautiful shots of the Irish countryside and a somewhat less beautiful Gaelic song. As the camera zooms in on SAMCRO on their Irish bikes (how'd they get those so soon upon arrival?), Irish rock kicks in. They ride across Ireland, with Gemma and a few others in a military-style jeep trailing behind. Maureen sends Trinity out with groceries for home, I guess, and then thoughtfully watches her walk away. We stay with Trinity, who carries the groceries to her mom's and puts them in the fridge, then leans over the guy passed out on the dining room table. The Irish music continues as we're with Tara back in Charming, drinking coffee to Abel's crib. Then we're with Abel, in what appears to be a baby thrift store, run by Father Kellan Ashby, who crosses Abel's forehead. Jimmy's in a bar somewhere on his cell phone. He hangs it up and sits down at a booth with his friend. SAMCRO boys ride and ride across the green Irish plains. They stop and meet up with SAMBEL. McGee and Clay exchange warm hugs and cussing -- as do many of the other guys -- but Gemma looks on from the Jeep, wearing the skeptical sunglasses of a worried woman. Chibs meets his nephew, who fills him in on the safety of Chibs's ladies. McGee makes sure everything's cool between him and Clay. Clay says it is, so they all get back on their bikes to ride off together. But not into the sunset or anything, because this is Ireland. There is no sun.

Unser comes back to taunt Tig, lying down in his cell, about his lawyer being in Belfast. He lists off Tig's crimes (Tig says it's all "hearsay" other than speeding), then lets Tig out, because Tara's posted his bail. Before Tara leaves, Unser pulls her aside to make sure she told him everything honestly about what happened with Gemma's escape, before he hands the information over to the FBI. She looks guiltily downward -- I wouldn't recommend Tara play any poker -- and then assures him she didn't forget anything. On their way out, Tig finds out his license is suspended and will be for at least a couple of years. Tig wonders how he'll work without a license, but more importantly: How will he ride? Tara promises to have someone pick him up at impound, but Tig still thinks this is bullshit.

Our SAMCRO + SAMBEL parade meets a police roadblock back in Ireland. Gemma's Jeep driver assures her that as long as everyone has ID, they'll be fine; she's still wearing her skeptical sunglasses, though, and they're moving toward scared. The cops hit only the SAMCRO bikers up for ID, then head back to their car to check it out. Back in the van, Gemma's removed her sunglasses so she has to actually talk ("This is bad") so we'll know her fear and skepticism are still strong. The cops way-too-quickly realize the SAMCRO guys have fled jurisdiction in California and yell for them to get down on the ground; they're under arrest. Gemma's driver doesn't think it makes any sense that the cops would be able to get the intel that quick. Chibs spits in a cop's face and then a fight breaks out. Gemma's upgraded to an "Oh, shit!" as she watches from the van. The cops and their automatic weapons win this one and lead the guys to the police van. Gemma's driver thinks these asshole cops will probably just shoot them and dump them after Chibs's spitting incident. Gemma's having none of that, so she pushes the driver aside and guns the Jeep right into the police van (she has time to throw her sunglasses on first, though). The cops flee as Gemma's driver shoots in their general direction. Oh, good. So now she'll be wanted by the Irish government, too. Jax wonders what the hell just happened, and Chibs's nephew welcomes him to Ireland. It's impressive what these guys are capable of making light of. Credits -- Irish-ified.

After a commercial break, the two SAMs have a cop who was left behind. They want to know who tipped him off and why, so they all take turns beating the crap out of him. Then they threaten to kill one of his men if he doesn't talk, so he admits they were paid to detain them, but he has no idea by whom. More threats assures the guys he's not lying, so they pull the cops' IDs and make some threats against their families if they tell anyone about this. Then they're on their way.

Back in Charming, Tig's living out his worst nightmare, since Kozik's the one who was sent to pick him up. It is, however, not my worst nightmare because I'd like nothing more than an Odd Couple spin-off in which these two are roommates. This whole driving thing is the perfect conduit for that, since Tig would need to rely on his roomie more than ever. You're welcome, Kurt Sutter. Kozik even tells Tig he'll let him ride bitch with him while he doesn't have a license, but Tig's plans are to send Kozik back to Tacoma; he's never, ever letting him in to SAMCRO. Kozik: "It's been eight years, douchebag." Tig's like, "You know, when you put it that way, you're right. You're in!" Or, wait, I guess that's not how people generally respond to being called "douchebag." Tig actually says that not a day goes by that he doesn't think about "her." The plot thickens.

Unser and Jacob. Meeting of the minds. Jacob accuses Unser of helping Gemma, but Unser promises they're still on the same side; he's not helping them. But Jacob needs him to do more than not help them; he needs to hurt them. A ruckus in the hallway gets Unser and Jacob's attention. It's Salazar, who's pissed about the death of his boy last week (you know, even though he fingered him). Jacob's glad to know Salazar has such a strong opinion about how his friend died, but Unser basically tells him to leave that to the sheriff's office.

Ashby's Provisions. Maureen hears and then watches as the SAMs ride by and join up with even more of the SAMBEL contingent in a parking lot that's apparently reserved for just such a purpose. She and Trinity head 'round to greet them, and it's an awkward, if not entirely unfriendly, meeting of John Teller's baby mamas, his kids, and Clay. They all shake and then Maureen sends Trinity inside. Gemma wonders where her grandson is, so Maureen invites her upstairs for a cup of tea. Gemma doesn't want any goddamn tea, which is practically fighting words to an Irishwoman, who asks for a wee bit of respect in her own homeland. Gemma asks if coffee's an option, and it seems to smooth things over well enough for them to head inside. Maureen fills them in: Cameron brought Abel to her. Father Ashby has him now. But they can't go after the priest; he'll find them. Maureen says she's sorry this has happened, and she can't imagine the pain they're all feeling.

Jimmy takes a call from Liam, who's been riding with the SAMs. He tells him he's not sure if SAMCRO trusts him, and he isn't sure if McGee has the heart for this. Jimmy doesn't need heart, though; he needs guts and brains. He hang up and kicks a table in the bar he's in, just to show us how very much he needs those things. And, if that wasn't enough, he throws a chair. He, like, really doesn't need heart, y'all. And that's why he's so emotional.

In the office at SAMCRO's garage, Tara's going through files while Chuck babbles about liking it here better than in jail. Outside, Tig and Kozik bicker like they're in love. Chuck tells Tara that, judging by the level of malevolence between Tig and Kozik, there must be a vagina involved. Not that we needed that scene, since we figured out the vagina part earlier when Tig said "her." Tara thanks him and heads outside, where she bumps into Lyla, who apologizes for Ima. Tara says it's not her fault, and she appreciates that Lyla hit her. That's the perfect segue, as Lyla sees it, to ask Tara where's a good place to go for an abortion. She wants it quiet, and off the books, and Opie doesn't know she's pregnant. She might want babies with him someday, but the timing's just not right. She's done this before, though, so it's not a big deal.

Jacob and Darby, sitting in a car. Darby swears the intel he had on the prescriptions was good, and Jacob trusts him and pays up, then offers him a new proposition. Jacob can help Darby show Charming he's turned over a new leaf, and he doesn't even have to get dirty. He just needs Darby to help him get Lumpy out of his gym, since he needs four places to do whatever dirty deed he's planning in a full Charming city block. If Darby's not interested, he can just leave Jacob's money behind. Which, of course, he doesn't.

All the SAMs are packed around a giant table somewhere in Belfast. It's a hilarious site, actually, since it looks like a bunch of executives at a conference table. Except, you know, with shaggy hair and biker jackets. SAMCRO wants to find Jimmy, but McGee tells them they can't call the priest asking questions like that unless they very much want to have their asses handed to them. Some leather-clad youth busts in to let them know they have visitors. The SAMCRO guys walk outside and look hopefully at a big black van. Chibs is the one who gets to celebrate, though, when Fiona and Kerianne get out. Tearful, huggy reunion as inspirational music picks up so we can see how emotional this is. Gemma comes out to take a peek, too, and she almost cracks a smile, even. Inside later, Fiona says she has no idea what's up with Jimmy, who doesn't trust her anymore. She does know he's been recruiting, though, from his bar in Newry, where he pretty much lives. She knows nothing about Liam's involvement with Jimmy, but repeats that she's been in the dark lately. She's sorry she's no help, but no one's holding it against her. Fiona and Kerianne are supposed to stay at the rectory with Father Ashby, to keep them safe since Jimmy could try to hurt them. Chibs promises he won't let that happen, and the SAMs all flash their guns to show just how safely they'll be able to get Chibs's ladies back to Father Ashby.

Lumpy (or, as I'll always know him, Adelai Niska) watches some guys practice their jabs and hooks when Darby comes in, all friendly and conversational. He tells Lumpy that some friends of his want him to consider their generous offer to buy this place. Lumpy's not exactly won over by the swastika tattoo hanging out the top of Darby's shirt given his own tattoo: his Holocaust number on this arm. Lumpy tells Darby to come on back after he closes if there's something he has to do, because he'll retire when he dies. Darby tries to tell him that if it's not him causing problems for Lumpy, it will be someone else, but Lumpy's survived the holocaust, so he's not about to let this scare him away.

Gemma's sleeping off her jetlag (and heart attack) when Maureen comes in and wakes her. They decide it's about time for a heart to heart. Gemma says she was holding onto hope all the way here that Maureen might be wrong about Trinity, but she could see John in her as soon as she saw her. Gemma asks if John knew; he did. Gemma's pissed, and Maureen apologizes, using her age at the time as an excuse. She goes on that she doesn't expect them to be friends, but this shit needs to stay buried. Gemma says it seems that no matter how deep she buries shit, someone always digs it up. Maureen tells Gemma that the truth right now will only distract Jax, which isn't a good idea. Gemma doesn't agree, but you can see she's agreed. Speaking of Jax, Trinity joins him in his room and gives him some clean sheets. She flirts a little and tells him how sorry she is about his son. Jax asks her how old she is, and finds out she's totally legal at 22 (except for the part where she's his sister, of course). Juice summons Jax to go with Chibs to return Fiona and Kerianne, and Trinity decides to go along, so they don't get lost in the big city. But mostly to flirt with her half-brother. Could this get any creepier? Oh, show, please do not answer that question.

Back at Teller-Morrow, Chuck takes a call for Tig. It's Lumpy. And Darby's back at Jacob's car (Jacob's listening to elevator music, which is totally perfect), throwing the envelope of money back at him: "Find another bitch." Inside, Lumpy tells Tig and Kozik what's up, not so he can be protected but so someone knows what happens if Lumpy winds up dead. While they're in the boxing ring, Kozik challenges Tig to a boxing match, which he takes him up on, though we don't get to see it for no reason at all. It's not like they were trying to save time in this hour-and-a-half episode that somehow feels even longer. Maybe if we'd gotten to see the Odd Couple battle it out, it would have been a little more fun.

1 2 3 4

onk, thinking it's just another Irish drunk driver, but it was the set-up for a drive-by shooting. Masked bandits shoot up the car and then take off. SAMs are back at the conference table later, when Chibs comes in and tells them the girls made it safely to the rectory and no one knows who the shooter was. SAMCRO tends to think it was Jimmy's guys, but McGee says it was the Ulster Volunteers, who have been after Jimmy and know Fiona's with him. Liam tells Jax that if they'd wanted him dead, he would be. McGee agrees it had to have been a message to Jimmy to cease and desist. SAMCRO's not in Charming anymore.

Back at the hospital, Tara and her boss, Margaret, have an awkward conversation about where Tara's friend can have a discreet abortion. Margaret thinks Tara's friend is actually her "friend," and tells her that if it were Tara, she'd fully support that decision, not because the father's a criminal but because the mother's uncertain about her future, which she knows would be an unstable environment for a baby. Tara, who seemed all casual when she walked into the room with Margaret, is suddenly in serious contemplation.

Jacob's bailed Salazar out of jail, since they have something in common: They both lost someone because of the Sons of Anarchy, and they both want the debt settled. Jacob would like to give Salazar a couple grand now and two later for two hours of his time. Not many folks could turn down $2,000 an hour, so you can't really hold it against him when he leaves his lady to get in the car with Jacob.

Back in the SAMBEL parking lot, it's full-on party time, with kids and adults fighting, drinking, running around, and being all sorts of inappropriate. Liam finishes his boxing with someone and asks who else will take him on. Jax, with a bone or two to pick unofficially, steps up. Trinity looks worried about him and a little turned on as she offers to wrap his hands. Gemma watches the serious flirtation going on and, instead of telling her son that he is hitting on his sibling, she finds herself turned on by it, too, since she invites Clay back to their room, saying she'd rather watch "my man's big dick" than her son defend his honor. Clay can't say no to that, though he does have a little concern about her heart. She gives Jax a kiss on her way out and asks Trinity where her mom is. Maureen ain't much for parties, it turns out. Or maybe she just prefers to party alone, judging by the serious drinking and smoking she's doing inside at her kitchen table.

Liam and Jax knock each other around, which is a perfect time to cut back to Charming, where Tig's no worse for wear but Kozik's bleeding from the eye after their own boxing match. They leave a prospect (who we'll call "Prospect Fail" for reasons to be made clear soon enough) at Lumpy's place, and tell him that Lumpy sleeps in the back room, so he better guard him well. Tig gives Prospect Fail a gun, and he and Tig leave. Another Prospect offers to stay, too, but the Odd Couple won't let him.

Jax is looking well-oiled post-fight, just how his sister likes him, as she congratulates him (a quick shot of a bloodied-up Liam makes it clear what a badass Jax really is) and then offers him the use of the bathroom inside her place, so he doesn't have to listen to his mom and Clay going at it. But, as they're heading back to her place, Father Ashby shows up and asks Jax to get cleaned up and then make his way to St. Matt's so they can have a talk. Jax tells Trinity goodbye, and Father Ashby tells her to put her ma to bed. Which, to Trinity, means covering her up with a blanket where she's passed out on the couch. Then she goes to bed herself with a "Love you, Ma."

At Lumpy's, breaking glass awakens Prospect Fail. He hides behind a trophy case and watches Salazar come in with a gun and break shit up. He slips away into the room to hide as Salazar steals a medal out of a trophy case, then shoots the whole place up. Lumpy's awakened and comes storming out, yelling at Salazar, who tells Lumpy to tell the Sons that nobody messes with the Mayans. As if the knocked-out Lumpy will be telling anyone anything. But, still, good attempt at starting a gang war and slithering right on out of it. Prospect Fail runs out of the place with his tail between his legs.

Abortion clinic. Tara waits with Lyla, who thanks her for doing this since she doesn't really have anyone in her porn circle who'd be there at a time like this. Lyla wonders if Tara thinks she's a freak, but Tara promises she doesn't. She asks Lyla if she's sure she wants to go through with this. Lyla's sure. She does love Opie, and would love to have kids with him someday, but not right now, while Donna's ghost looms so large. She says Opie tries to let her in, but the fear of something awful keeps her on the outside. The nurse comes out and calls for "Sarah Palin." Lyla guesses that's her, hugs Tara, and heads back. Tara goes to the desk and schedules her own appointment. She tells the receptionist she's about seven weeks along.

Belfast. The SAM table is looking less conference and more poker as the guys are playing cards. Gemma comes out in a robe and chats with Bobby Elvis in the kitchen as he makes her some tea. Gemma can't believe how much has happened on this first day in Belfast. Bobby Elvis: "Just another vacation." He chuckles, then sighs, then really asks her how she's doing. She says she's okay, and Bobby Elvis promises they'll find the kid. She knows. The way she watches Clay so lovingly here makes me think maybe she's not going to make it to the day when they get Abel back. Gemma tells Bobby Elvis he'll have to take care of Clay when she's gone, but he doesn't want her going to the scary place. He says they're all right and she says, "Okay," then hugs him. But she's not all that convincing. She's much more convincing blowing kisses to Clay, who blows them right back at her before she heads off to bed.

Prospect Fail leaves his Sons of Anarchy jacket and the gun Tig gave him on a car and rides off into the night, (hopefully) never to be heard from again. Unless he's going to have to deliver the message about the Mayans to the guys. Maybe he saved us some time and put a note in his pocket.

Belfast. McGee gets a call from Jimmy, who tells him to put today's "little setback" behind them. He gives his phone to his booth mate Donny, who will fill Liam in on the details of what's to happen .

A church. St. Matt's, I presume. Father Ashby and Jax sit together, and Father Ashby assures Kellan that Abel's safe. He says Abel was in danger from Jimmy, and still is. Jax doesn't understand why Jimmy has any reason to hurt his kid, but Father Ashby says he has many. He tells Jax that the words he's about to share with him are very volatile "and only God can be a witness." But, don't worry, because even God wouldn't be able to follow the Father's logic about what's about to happen here. He tells Jax that Jimmy wants to end the IRA's relationship with the Sons of Anarchy, and cut out SAMBEL from any future work, stop dealing guns in SAMCRO. Jimmy says the gun dealing is why his dad helped set up the charter with SAMBEL. But Father Ashby says Jimmy wants to sell the guns to Russians in Oregon for a greater profit because he wants more money. Everything he does is for profit. Jax, like the rest of us, wonders what this has to do with his kid. Father Ashby says the IRA's come to a very difficult decision: Jimmy's greed and arrogance has become a hindrance internally and politically. He says Jax experienced that hatred tonight, with the drive-by shooting. Jax figures out that Father Ashby's going to get rid of Jimmy, but that's not quite what the priest has in mind: Jimmy's so enmeshed in the IRA that word can't get out that they'd kill one of their own leaders. So he needs Jax to kill him over the vengeance of a distraught father, something every Irishman would understand. Jax asks if Jimmy knows about this conversation, and Father Ashby says Jimmy knows the lines have been drawn, which is why he lied to Jax about Abel and tried to get him deported right away

1 2 3 4

By DeAnn Welker

Speaking of fun, Trinity, Jax, Chibs, Fiona, and Kerianne are headed to the rectory until SAMCRO leaves on Oswald's plane; Chibs is bringing them back with him. They don't have time to discuss Kerianne's lack of a desire to leave, though, because the car in front of them comes to an abrupt halt. They honk, thinking it's just another Irish drunk driver, but it was the set-up for a drive-by shooting. Masked bandits shoot up the car and then take off. SAMs are back at the conference table later, when Chibs comes in and tells them the girls made it safely to the rectory and no one knows who the shooter was. SAMCRO tends to think it was Jimmy's guys, but McGee says it was the Ulster Volunteers, who have been after Jimmy and know Fiona's with him. Liam tells Jax that if they'd wanted him dead, he would be. McGee agrees it had to have been a message to Jimmy to cease and desist. SAMCRO's not in Charming anymore.

By DeAnn Welker

Back at the foster home/baby thrift store, where Abel's new loving family is taking him home. I don't get why Father Ashby won't show Abel to Jax if he doesn't have something more sinister planned than he's letting on.

week: SAMCRO's still in Ireland. Now with more guns. There's some shit going down back in Charming, too. Explosions! Gunfights! A gavel bangs! Jimmy points a gun at Gemma's head. And it looks like Jax is either knocked out or sleeping. It looks quite a bit more exciting than this mostly setup, setup, and setup episode.

DeAnn, a writer and editor in Portland, Oregon, went to Ireland for her honeymoon. It was nothing like this episode. You can contact her at twopmodmars@gmail.com.

See an interview with Kim "Tig" Coates from Sons of Anarchy.

Check out an episode preview below, discuss it in our forums, and check out our gallery of why SAMCRO should have their charter revoked!

Want to immediately access TWoP content no matter where you are online? Download the free TWoP toolbar for your web browser. Already have a customized toolbar? Then just add our free toolbar app to get updated on our content as soon it's published.