In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.
Black Swan choreographer (and Natalie Portman's hot piece of a husband) Benjamin Millepied is the guest judge this week, as the Top 10 split up to dance with the All-Stars. What normally is an exciting chance for the dancers to blend their styles with more polished performers this season threatens to be an exercise in more charismatic dancers whom we love more (Twitch! Alison! Alex!) eclipsing this season's dull (if talented) roster. But let's see how they did:
Tiffany draws disco with Brandon Bryant, and between the kinetic energy of the style and the glitziness of the costumes, she impresses. Witney teams up with the Shaping Sound duo of Travis (choreographer) and Nick Lazzarini (partner) on a jazz routine about sexy ghosts. It's a good pairing, and she managed to deliver the sex appeal that appeared to be the main objective. Cole gets blown off the stage by Anya Garnis with a Dmitry-choreographed cha-cha, and despite the fact that he actually begs for a ticket to the Hot Tamale Train, Mary found too many flaws in the footwork to give it to him, making me fall in love with Mary all the more.
Lindsay draws by darling Jakob Karr as a partner for Broadway, which only makes me hate her all the more. Good luck getting me to look at anything else on stage when Jakob is doing his thing, but the judges do what they always do, which is pat Lindsay on the head and tell her she's a wonderful little princess. Mary even hands her Cole's ticket on the Hot Tamale Train. Will gets Bollywood with Kathryn McCormick, which is pretty much just good news all around. Will delivers the face-pullingest Bollywood ever, and kind of a sloppy one at that, not that the judges recognize it, and more importantly not like the voters will punish him for it, as Will is basically a taller, fleshier Kent Boyd at this point.
Cyrus is the beneficiary of the night's best choreography (Travis), best partnering (Jamie Goodwin), and best music (M83), but he holds up under the glare and gets raves from the judges, even if he mostly just holds up Jamie while she explodes on stage. Chehon draws a Dave Scott hip-hop with Lauren Gottlieb, and while he never shakes the ballet-dancer-trying-hip-hop thing, the end result is enjoyably strange and compelling. George gets to partner with Allison (yay!) on a Tyce Diorio jazz (boo!), and they're flawless, despite Nigel's prissy bitching about George not connecting on stage (which, in light of the results, seems like ass-covering more than anything else).
Eliana gets a Stacey Tookey contemporary with Alex Wong that, for me, fell just short of the steaminess that the judges saw, but it's still pretty damn impressive. And Audrey closes the performances out by alllllmost keeping up with Twitch on a Dave Scott hip-hop.
Then Cat announces the bottom four: Witney, Audrey, Chehon, and George. Well, I just give up. Do what you want with this season, America. I'm out. The boys in particular deliver some killer solos, and Nigel says it's Chehon's solo that keeps him around as George (the best dancer this season, I should add) is eliminated. Audrey never really stood a chance against Witney, so she's going too. I hope you're proud of yourselves, America.
Want more? The full recap starts right below!Previously: we somehow made it to a Top 10 without me having any idea who some of these people are. Part of it is the decreased screen time that comes with performances and results in the same episode. Part of it was the Olympic break. But part of it falls on the dancers themselves, a group of the most talented dancers ever on the show, but so few of them manage to infuse their routines with any kind of personality. (Of course, the ones who do, like Amelia and Witney, end up in the bottom anyway, so who knows WHAT is the problem.) Either way, this season is dipping further and further below sea level and it's got me worried.
And honestly, the way to start winning me over is decidedly NOT a Tyce Diorio group routine. Particularly not one where Tyce is dancing with the Top 10. Apparently Cole was too injured to take part (though unfortunately not too injured to continue in the competition), but even so, with all the All-Stars on hand this week, Tyce still managed to fight his way into the spotlight. The routine is a tribute to Gene Kelly, and I know that because it begins with a closeup on a director's chair that reads "Gene Kelly." So it's a tribute to his most iconic roles, in Singing in the Rain and On the Town and so on. Eliana and Chehon seem to be featured. And Cyrus, of course. Can't have a group dance that doesn't spotlight Cyrus. The dance itself is a classic Diorio jumble, the whole never adding up to the sum of its parts. Cole gets to have his moment at the end of the routine, atop a ladder, yelling "CUT!"
Cat is incredibly kind in calling Tyce's appearance a "cameo" rather than a coup d'état, and then she introduces Gene Kelly's widow sitting in the audience, and considering today would have been Mr. Kelly's 100th birthday, it should be noted that his widow is YOUNG! Anyway, joining Nigel and Mary this week is Black Swan co-star and choreographer (and Natalie Portman's hot piece of a husband) Benjamin Millepied. Lots of ballet input this year, which I like.
Tiffany and Brandon Bryant (Season 5): Disco (Doriana Sanchez)
Would you believe this routine is "fun" and has a lot of lifts??? Doriana says so! Every time! Also, it should be noted that Brandon KILLED on disco in his season. The routine ... disco is so often hard to evaluate. In particular, so much of the heavy lifting on this one is done by Brandon, or the outfit, or the camerawork. But Tiffany sells it. There are a few clunky transitions, but she pulled it together near the end and zipped through some hip-shaking. The lifts are all ostentatious and impressive, sure, but they're all spotlighted so much that they never surprise you. They feel a bit labored. Nigel says he loves Tiffany's energy and excitement, which I agree she brought. Benjamin also brings up the energy level and her expressive face, which served her better this week than it did last week. I really think I like her (she's in that Courtney Galiano mold), I just never remember her!
Witney and Nick Lazzarini (Season 1): Jazz (Travis Wall)
Oh, it's a Shaping Sound showcase! I trust you're all watching All the Right Moves? I love Nick as a dancer and all, but watching him on that show, I just do not trust him! I think he's trying to pull some All About Eve stuff on Travis. Anyway, ghosts! That's the theme of this piece -- they're ghosts from the 1920s or something. Sexy is the watchword for Witney, this week. Travis wants to bring the sexy out! Nick wants to give her sexy lessons! Et cetera. On stage, there's lots of fast, jazzy movement, and some great lines by both dancers. Benjamin loved the release and tension in the routine and thought it was great fun. Nigel recognized the sexy in Witney this week, because he is a goddamned genius. Whatever, nothing in this critique matters as much as Mary exclaiming, "Lord have Murphy!" That was astounding.
Cole and Anya Garnis (Season 3): Cha-Cha (Dmitry Chaplin)
Aw, Dmitry! Always a pleasure. Cole outright says his goal is to be the season's first passenger on the Hot Tamale Train, which I would find presumptuous even on a dancer I wasn't already annoyed with. This cha-cha is set to The Wanted's pleasingly pervy "Glad You Came." Don't tell anyone, but I LOVE when the choreographers program a ballroom routine to a dumb song like this. Anyway, Anya is just a delight (and as Mary later says, the passenger on the maiden voyage of the "Hot Tamale Train"). But Cole ... well, ballroom is one style where commitment to some weirdo character isn't going to be enough. He's way too loosey-goosey with the legs. Mary's is the only opinion I want here, and indeed she tells him specifically where his footwork went wrong. She says she can't put him on the Hot Tamale Train tonight! HAHAHA! Sorry, that's probably mean, but he's been consistently overpraised all season. Let me have this. Nigel wants Cole to play less to the audience and pay more attention to his partner. We see Matthew and Alexa in the audience, and I'm glad to see them having fun again. They both looked so beaten down upon their exits.
Lindsay and Jakob Karr (Season 6): Broadway (Spencer Liff)
Jakob! One of my all-time favorites to have ever passed through this show. Meanwhile, Spencer's been getting stronger and stronger every time he choreographs, so I'm excited for this one. It's a really creative routine, with Lindsay and Jakob on opposite sides of a screen that casts a shadow on one of them or the other, and they mirror each other's Fosse-inspired movement. It's intelligent, coherent choreography and super fun to watch. Moreover, it shows off both dancers' forms quite well. Truthfully, I'm more impressed with Jakob mirroring Lindsay's feminine motions than the other way around. After they dance, Nigel requests a pointed foot from Jakob, and it starts to get ... okay, I'm just going to say sexual, because it kind of does. Please stop getting sexual with Jakob's perfect feet, Nigel. Meanwhile, he calls Lindsay "magnificent yet again." WHAT do they see in this girl? She seems perfectly adequate and nothing more. They always do this, just pat Lindsay on the head and tell her she's a wonderful little princess. Mary even hands her Cole's ticket on the Hot Tamale Train. I don't know. Nigel and Mary fawn over Jakob some more -- hey, where was this support when he was getting backburnered for Russell in his season? HUH?
Will and Kathryn McCormick (Season 6): Bollywood (Nakul Dev Mahajan)
There's usually not much of a big concept for these Bollywood numbers, but this one has Will the snake charmer and Kathryn the snake. I should mention here that Kathryn is SO GREAT in Step Up: Revolution, and I was so happy they gave her so much contemporary to do. Will is going overboard even in the rehearsal package. How, in this season of personality deficiencies, did Will manage to get TOO much? He pulls so many faces in the routine, it borders on corny. Bollywood is already floating on this alchemy that's threatening to become corny at any second anyway; this kind of hamminess proves most fatal to that balance. It's a good routine, but not by much. After, Cat jokes about "Will Ferrell jazz flute," meaning she remains my very favorite person. Mary spotlights what is admittedly a breathtaking ronde from Will, and both she and Benjamin are full of compliments. Nigel admits his first instinct is to say "Just calm down a little bit; take things more seriously," but then he tells himself to shut up. No, Nigel! Just this once, go with your gut!
Cyrus and Jamie Goodwin (Season 3): Contemporary (Travis Wall)
VERY fortunate for Cyrus to pull Travis here, because Travis came armed with one of the season most impressive concepts. This would be another Shaping Sound showcase, with Travis as Jamie. The story is that Cyrus and Jamie are the last two people on earth. Simple enough. Travis really plays up the difficult angle in rehearsals, as he says how "blown away" he is by how fast Cyrus is retaining the choreography. On stage, the lighting and costumes are stark, and the music -- M83's "Outro" -- is exquisite, and if you've been noodling over the Cloud Atlas trailer for the last few weeks like I've been, you've already had it in your head for a while. Travis has a gift for picking music for his routines, and this is yet another triumph. Cyrus shows great strength and support for Jamie. He pulls off some good contemporary moves in his own right, but let's be honest: this is Jamie's show, and she makes him look awfully good. Can I just vote for Jamie to win this season? She just explodes onstage. Routines like this make me feel like she was one contemporary showcase from taking Season 3 at a run. Benjamin loved Cyrus's "raw energy" and good partnering, while Nigel says that while some people "want to dance," Cyrus "has to dance." Mary weirdly takes time to mention how Travis DIDN'T hide him in this routine, which I don't entirely agree with. No, he wasn't in the darkened wings of the stage, but he really did spend 60% of the routine lifting Jamie up while she danced. "You make us feel something," Mary sums up. This is starting to feel like a season-6 Russell narrative (and Cyrus is nowhere near as good as Russell was).
Chehon and Lauren Gottlieb (Season 3): Hip-Hop (Dave Scott)
The concept here is that Chehon is leaning on Lauren literally, to represent how one would lean on a friend metaphorically. Chehon, as you might expect, is nervous about picking up hip hop, since it's so far removed from ballet. At one point in rehearsal, Lauren accidentally steps out from under him, and he falls, and they have a good laugh about it. There's also a funny moment as Chehon tries to get used to Dave Scott's method of using random words and grunts in place of counts. (Dave: "what! no! ha!" Chehon: "No?"). On stage, while it's clear that Chehon doesn't have the movement completely nailed, he's nevertheless fully committed. He never shakes the ballet-dancer-trying-hip-hop thing, but the end result is enjoyably strange and compelling. The more I watch, the more I'm transfixed. I guess that's the appeal of Chehon -- even when he's getting it wrong, he makes it look like something completely new and riveting. Nigel thanks Dave for taking that stick out of Chehon's ass. Pretty well sick of Nigel using that metaphor on the overwhelmingly gay dancers on this series. He implores Chehon to keep finding ways to engage the audience. Mary wanted more funk, but she thought he accomplished a lot tonight. Benjamin, a fellow ballet dancer, seems to really sympathize how much terrain Chehon had to cover in the journey from ballet to hip-hop, and he gives him a lot of credit.
George and Alison Holker (Season 2): Jazz (Tyce Diorio)
The idea here is that George foregoes his train home so he can stick around Paris and have a raunchy rendezvous with Allison. I worry about George having to be sexy, but he actually performs the routine pretty flawlessly. I wish Tyce hadn't said "raunchy" in rehearsal, because the dance is gorgeous on its own terms, and no one would have thought to look for raunch if Tyce didn't call it out. The choreography is overstuffed with too much story that it threatens to overwhelm the quality of movement, which is too bad. These are two expert contemporary dancers flying at each other. Nigel risks the wrath of the audience by saying he didn't believe George's character and that it was immature. But the audience doesn't attack him with boos -- in fact both Mary AND Cat have to basically tell them too. This is the George problem in a nutshell. The Dance audience is hardly slow to boo a negative critique, so why don't they care about George?
Eliana and Alex Wong (Season 7): Contemporary (Stacey Tookey)
Aw, Alex! The dance references a crumbling relationship, and Stacey says Eliana has to de-prettify herself for the routine to work. They dance to "Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)" by Nancy Sinatra, which is a fantastic choice. The dancing is humid and liquid and intense, but I think it was going for dangerous and sultry and it fell a bit short of that. Two delicious concurrent solos, but I'm not sure the chemistry was what it could've been. Regardless of what I think, the routine draws a standing ovation (though Benjamin looked like he was a reluctant joiner, or maybe I'm projecting). Eliana is Nigel's favorite girl, and this dance was "by far" Mary's favorite routine. She says it was "layered like the perfect tiramisu." Mary's hitting the wordplay this week!
Audrey and Twitch (Season 4): Hip-Hop (Dave Scott)
This is the lesser of Dave's two routines this week. Audrey and Twitch are a 400-year-old vampire couple, dancing all around their coffin. They sell the concept well; it's pretty funny, and somewhat reminiscent of Kathryn and Legacy's "On and On" in Season 6. Audrey holds her own, but you're not going to steal the spotlight from Twitch. Benjamin thinks Audrey could have given a bit more. Nigel wanted her to serve a bit more Helena Bonham Carter, but still, he says this is sure to be on the finale (... really?).
RESULTS!
We're back to the quick band-aid-ripping results format this week. The Bottom 4 are as follows: Witney, Audrey, Chehon, and George. WHAT THE FUCK, AMERICA? At this point, these four have been in the bottom so often that it can't be a fluke. America is connecting to the bigger personalities in Will and Cole and Cyrus, fine. And I guess the Cole and Cyrus halos have transferred over to Lindsay and Eliana (the latter is fully deserving of her spot, don't get me wrong). I just don't think I've seen a season where voters set aside talent for personality quite this clearly before.Nigel requests solos from all four, not that I think it matters. Witney delivers one of the more spirited ballroom solos of the seaon. Audrey dances to Jennifer Holliday's "And I Am Telling You," which is so weird. Chehon tears it down on his solo once again, but does it even matter anymore? America don't care, my darling. America don't care. Meanwhile, out comes George, the best dancer of the whole season, once again begging for special dispensation from Uncle Nigel to stick around and be ignored by the public for another week. Choke on it, you stupid damn country.
After a ballet performance by L.A. Dance Project, and choreographed by Benjamin Millepied, Nigel is back with results. Oh my God AGAIN with re-explaining the process, Nigel??? You get input from the choreographers, YOU'VE SAID THIS. Nigel proceeds to save Witney. Audrey's like "Duh." It was the right elimination this week, but I am still amazed that the people who danced that Titanic routine are both out of the competition this early.
, Nigel says George's solo was the greatest he's danced all season. Chehon, meanwhile, can't transfer the quality of his solos to his partner routines, but they're keeping him anyway. So sure, fine, get rid of George. Can we just FF to the end of the season already, where Eliana/Lindsay and Cole/Cyrus will battle it out for the win? Ugh. Not even Jakob hugging Cat during the episode-ending dance-off can improve my spirits.
RUNDOWN! (as always, in order of my preference)
George and Allison's jazz
Cyrus and Jamie's contemporary
Chehon and Lauren's hip-hop
Lindsay and Jakob's Broadway
Tiffany and Brandon's disco
Eliana and Alex's contemporary
Will and Kathryn's Bollywood
Cole and Anya's cha-cha
Audrey and Twitch's hip-hop
Joe R doesn't like saying things like Worst Season Ever, but ... Questions, comments, and unadulterated love can be sent to him at joseph.reid21@gmail.com.