Episode Report Card M. Giant: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Who is Jenny Galt?
By M. Giant | Season 2 | Episode 3 | Aired on 07.17.2006
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.Tuesday
It's a week of reversals. Apparently this week there was a lot of drama over who was singing which song, and this is the product of all of it. Patrice sings "Helter Skelter" in a not-remotely-scary fashion. Josh covers the third Nirvana song of the season, "Come as You Are," and the judges aren't impressed that he did just that. Storm tones down the theatrics for her version of the Cars' "Just What I Needed," but that microphone stand is still going to need a lot of therapy. Lukas does "Let's Spend The Night Together," and is less Jagger than Jon Cryer in Pretty in Pink. Jill returns to what I assume are her bar-band roots with Free's "All Right Now," and Ryan's lead-footed "Fortunate Son" makes us all wonder about his definition of the word "fortune." Phil's "White Rabbit" is his best performance to date, even though Jason joins him onstage and plows his bass right into him. Dana attempts to rock a Bon Jovi song, but doesn't quite pull it off. Again. Toby's rendition of "Runaway Train" fails to thrill, but come on -- it's "Runaway Train." Bono's sunglasses join Magni for a duet of STP's "Plush." And Zayra gets her Björk on for a torchy version of "Everbody Hurts," which, my ears actually don't, so much. Jenny's performance of "Drive" by Incubus is correctly described as more "Lilith Fair" than "OzzFest," and Dilana earns the closing slot with a rocking Cranberries cover. Yes, you heard me. Initial bottom three: Jenny, Dana, and Ryan. Still feeling fortunate, Mr. Star?
Wednesday
After last week's elimination show, the Supernovices have learned their lesson with regards to complaining about the judges on-camera at the Rock Star mansion; they know that they'll just have to eat their words at the taping later. So now they complain on-camera about each other. Specifically, Ryan says that Dana shouldn't even be on the show. When confronted with it in the Nut Gallery, Ryan not only doesn't back down, but says Dana's so not rock that she embarrasses him. One assumes that he's also embarrassed to find himself in the initial bottom three with her just minutes later. Jenny was also in the initial bottom three, and they're joined in the bottom five by Zayra and Josh. Yes, Josh. Jenny stays in the bottom three and tries to show that she can rock a Stone Temple Pilots cover, but it's a lot like watching your first-grade teacher trying drugs for the first time. Dana's also in the bottom three, and having taken Dilana's advice to heart, she gets way into a Sass Jordan tune and pulls it off quite well indeed. Ryan and Zayra are safe, which means the third member of the bottom three is Josh. Yes, Josh. He does another Nirvana song ("Heart-Shaped Box"), but sounds a lot less like Lyle Lovett than he did last night. And so Jenny goes home, with a new outlook on life and a promise to be less "safe" from now on. It's a coming-of-age story, really. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
So our host Dave and his wife are splitsville. I blame his aggressive flirting with Brooke.
Tuesday
Brooke comes out dressed like a chandelier and introduces the remaining lucky thirteen Supernovices, as well as the band they're "sucking up to" (her words, not mine -- this time), including "the man who brings some serious ho to his hum, Tommy Lee." It still doesn't make any sense, no matter how much the audience screams. She also introduces Dave, who tells her that she looks spectacular. Brooke responds a little more nervously than usual, now that Dave's single again. Once that's out of the way, Brooke wastes no time telling us that the song selection process this week "got ugly."
Flashback to the Rock Star mansion, where the Supernovices are crowded around the bulletin board with this weekâs thirteen songs hung up. Toby's in the back trying to play scoutmaster, saying that he's going to write them all down so they can be organized about this. But Josh isn't having that and immediately lays claim to this week's Nirvana song, "Come as You Are." That makes Nirvana the only band to be featured every week so far, by the way. While he's pulling it down, Dana calls "Helter Skelter," which Josh also takes down and hands off to Dana. Dana's not the only one who wants it, though, as we see when Patrice grabs it out of her hand. Voices rise, and not in song. Toby tries to regain control, telling them all to put the songs back up. Ryan warns Josh that he's setting a horrible precedent, but Josh doesn't care. He's "sick of being a nice guy," and he's out of there with the song that he'd better fucking nail after being such a jerk about it. "Helter Skelter" somehow got back on the board, so that Patrice and Dana can continue arguing about it. Meanwhile, Lukas is trying to decide what he wants from what's left. Toby hums him the opening of the Stones "Let's Spend The Night Together," but Lukas is so not down with going out in front of people and singing "Badadada bop bop badaaada," because he's so much cooler than Mick Jagger. And then for some reason, Patrice and Jill are getting into it over "All Right Now," each defending her own maturity while racing the other to the sandbox. I'm really not sure what's going on there. Perhaps I shouldn't have skipped the webisode this week.
A bit later, Patrice is outside telling Josh, "I might have 'Helter Skelter.'" Josh asks if that's what she's holding, and when she says it is, he tells her, "Then you have 'Helter Skelter.'" Someone needs to tell Josh that heâs got no future in reality TV unless he learns how to get mad at people for doing things he just did. Inside, Jill is complaining to Storm and Zayra about Patrice's attitude, and they almost care. "Are there gonna be punches for frigging songs next week?" Zayra wonders, hoping to get into a promo.