Danny feels like he's missing out on partying with his roommates, and Melinda is holding him back. Danny still feels ugly because of his eye. Wes meets some college cheerleaders, and the guys go to a website and pick which members of the squad they want to party with. The boys and girls go out separately, and Danny and Melinda each worry that the other has found someone else. Instead, they both come home, and Melinda helps Danny while he drunkenly pukes. Later, Danny asks Melinda out for a Valentine's Day date. The roommates continue to learn more about SXSW and how to operate the video equipment, and then they get their first checks. When the roommates head to a meeting to learn more about SXSW, Danny and Wes are still drunk from the night before. Lacey handles the business, and everyone else sits around and yawns. And then my stupid recording cuts off before the very end, but Melinda and Danny are boring, so who cares? And I'll have a full recording in time for the recap.
As blues music plays, we see the roommates going out on the town to a club called the Dizzy Rooster. They drink, they dance, they do shots, they make fools of themselves. While everyone else is out, Danny takes a shower and voice-overs that it sucks that he can't go out with everyone, but that he'll be able to in a couple of weeks. Rachel interviews that Melinda goes out, but the whole time, she talks about how she wants to be home with Danny. So don't go, you know, EVERY NIGHT. I can see why Melinda would want to go out once in a while, but does she need to every night?
Melinda walks home from the club alone. She interviews that she wants to stay home with Danny all the time, and that he's always in the back of her head. Melinda arrives home. Danny, in the shower, voice-overs that he misses going out, and that he just wants to party and have a good time. Melinda finds Danny in the shower and totally starts making out with him, which seems like an invasion of privacy. Danny doesn't seem to mind, though, as he invites her in. Melinda gets in and takes off her clothes, which seems to reverse the usual order of things, but whatever. Danny interviews (with a suddenly completely healed eye) that Melinda is beautiful, but that she also has a great personality, so he's having a hard time not getting attached to her. In the shower, Melinda and Danny start making out.
Just when it's starting to feel like pornography, the other roommates arrive home. Lacey walks into the bathroom and realizes that Melinda and Danny are in the shower together. Lacey asks Melinda how she got home so fast, and then interviews that she really doesn't need to see people in the shower anymore. Wes invites himself into the shower, and Nehemiah totally starts to follow him. I think Wes would like nothing more than to be part of a Danny/Melinda sandwich. Wouldn't most fratty dudes like Wes act like they don't want anything to do with a naked male friend? Danny interviews that his roommates not only ruined the mood, they also jumped in the shower with him and Melinda. You know, if you're so concerned about "the mood," maybe you should find a place with a little more privacy than the communal shower.
Danny lies in bed with his ice pack clutched to his eyeball again. Melinda lies there with him and says that she only thinks about him while she's out. Danny talks but doesn't make much sense, and Melinda says that when Danny is able to go out again, she doesn't want him to feel held back. Danny interviews that he really likes Melinda, but that he also doesn't want to feel like he's missing out. Melinda tells him that she doesn't want him to go out, see a hot girl, make out with her, and then leave Melinda to deal with the fallout at home. So is Melinda saying that Danny should or should not feel free to hook up with other girls? Because it seems like she's arguing both sides here. Danny thinks they shouldn't worry about this until it becomes an issue. Yes, best to make relationship-threatening decisions when you're drunk and horny, instead of in the cold, rational light of day. I think that ice pack froze his brain. Melinda says she knows it's going to come up, and Danny excuses himself to get more ice, which is the Broken Eyeball version of "There's someone over there I need to talk to." Melinda interviews that she doesn't know if Danny wants a relationship, or if he'd rather be like Nehemiah and Wes and get groupies. Well, from what we saw last week, Nehemiah and Wes don't really "get" groupies.
The roommates arrive at the University of Texas for their job. Paul Stekler, their boss, asks for a summary of what they've done. Lacey reports that they need to meet with the head of SXSW to find out more about what their job is, and what they need to cover. Wes interviews that they are learning how to use the equipment. Danny interviews that they're getting excited about the whole thing. Based on the roommates' claims that they're working on actually doing work, Stekler hands over their checks.
Lacey and Johanna walk out of a restaurant and head home. Johanna brings up the whole Melinda/Danny relationship, which I have been avoiding calling Melindanny, because I kind of hate those combined name relationship terms, but this one sounds like a disease, so I guess it's okay. Plus, I'm lazy. Anyway, Lacey thinks that Danny has issues, because he flips out when anyone calls Melinda his girlfriend. Lacey is very judgmental about this; I don't know why it's her business whether or not Danny refers to Melinda as his girlfriend, since Melinda doesn't really seem to care.
Nehemiah, Wes, and Danny eat lunch somewhere. Danny asks his friends what he should do about his relationship. He explains that he told Melinda that he wants to go out with his friends sometimes and have guys' nights out, and Melinda told him that if that's what he wants to do, then they should end their relationship. Which seems kind of reasonable, actually. Danny interviews that he likes Melinda, but that he wants his freedom, but that he also wants to be with her. Welcome to the world, Danny.
Lacey and Johanna are still discussing Melindanny. Lacey thinks Danny is treating Melinda like "a leper," because he's "flipping out" when people call her his girlfriend. Johanna adds that if Danny doesn't want people to have the impression that Melinda is his girlfriend, he shouldn't treat her like one.
Danny tells the guys that it's "a Catch-22," because he could give Melinda up and not find anyone else. So she's okay, but he feels like there might be better out there? Then he'd be doing Melinda a favor by giving her up. Nehemiah interviews that Danny wants to have his cake and eat it too, but doesn't want to give up "something special" for "a lot of BS down the road."
This is turning into "Summer Nights" with all the switching back and forth between the boys and the girls discussing this relationship. Johanna thinks that the shit will hit the fan when Danny gets cleared to start going out with the guys. Johanna is annoyed with the guys, because they keep saying that they're "saving" Danny a girl. I hate to tell those guys, but Danny is probably the best-looking of all three of them. I don't think they need to hook him up. Johanna interviews that when Danny goes out, girls will be thrown at him, and Melinda will have to compete.
Danny asks his boys what he should do. Wes tells him to dump Melinda and go out and fuck as many girls as he can. Is anyone surprised that Wes said that? Anyone? Oh, that girl who wouldn't kiss Wes last week? She's surprised, because she can't believe that Wes is trying to act like he's got any sort of game? Good to know.
Rachel twists her hair in the bathroom and asks Danny if he's going out tonight. Danny says he's not. Rachel asks if he's going to go out tomorrow, and Danny says he doesn't know yet. Johanna interviews that Danny doesn't want to go out in public because of his eye, and that he feels very ugly. Wait. That's why he's not going out? I thought he wasn't going out either because his doctor told him to rest and not get jostled or anything, or because he couldn't drink because of his medication. I never thought it was because he lost the pretty. That's SO LAME! In seventh grade, I broke half of my front tooth off diving into a swimming pool, and I still went to school the day! Of course, I was (and am) a nerd, but still! Get over yourself.
Rachel says that the girls are going to have a Sex & The City night. I can't imagine what that would involve. Wearing really ugly clothes, drinking appletinis, making bad puns, and hooking up with guys? Isn't that what they do pretty much every night? Wes snarks that the guys are going to have a Laguna Beach night, which was almost funny, so points for Wes. Danny voice-overs that he wants Mel to go out and have a good time, and that she doesn't have to stay home and babysit him. Before they leave, Danny hugs Melinda and suggests that they stay home and have sex all night. Melinda laughs and says that he should have suggested that earlier, but she still goes out with the girls. I guess Danny's just not that good.
Danny sits in the hot tub, drinking a beer. So clearly, the reason he can't go out has nothing to do with alcohol. Also, what is with Danny and water therapy? He's always sulking in the shower, or the hot tub. Danny interviews that he thinks Melinda is gorgeous, and that a lot of guys will hit on her, which makes him jealous and worried.
The girls dance in a club while Danny sulks in a hot tub. And then they split the screen in half, and on one half is Danny crying and drinking beer, and on the other half is Melinda and her huge boobs dancing in a club. I hope the editors were either high or joking with that shot, because it was goddamn ridiculous.
Danny calls and makes a dinner reservation for Valentine's Day. He interviews that he's taking Melinda out, because he knows she wants to go. He wants to show her "a little bit of the romantic side." The guy taking the reservation reminds Danny that any cancellations need to be made twenty-four hours in advance.
Melindanny go to the eye doctor. Melinda interviews that Danny has stitches on the side of his eye and the side of his head, and that he's getting them removed. The doctor comes in and remarks that Danny's face is a lot less swollen. Melinda sits there while Danny has his stitches removed. It's a little freaky to see sharp, pointy objects so close to someone's eye. The doctor finishes without poking Danny's eyeball out, and Melinda asks if Danny can start exercising. Could she be more obvious? The doctor says that exercise is fine, but that he should avoid contact sports. Melinda bursts out laughing and the doctor blushes. Danny interviews that he feels better, and that he can go out like he did the first few nights they were in the house.
Danny, Nehemiah, and Wes check out a website and start hooting and hollering. Wes interviews that they were out getting burgers, and they met a hot chick. They asked her to join them at a bar that night, and to bring some friends. She told them to check out a particular website to see what her friends looked like, and then the guys checked it out and saw that it was a team photo of some college cheerleaders. Wes decided that they should make a list of recommendations for the original hot chick, to tell her who to bring. I note that she didn't suggest they do that, so the whole thing is kind of rude and idiotic, but that never stopped these guys before. Nehemiah calls the hot chick and lists off a bunch of names. The hot chick, Amber (of course), says that they're being ridiculous. Nehemiah asks her to get as many of the girls that she can from the list and meet them at 11. Amber actually says okay. "Okay"? How about "Fuck off!"?
The female roommates get dressed up and ready to go out. Rachel interviews that Melinda looks hot, and has never looked so beautiful. Okay, Melinda is wearing a plain black dress. It's kind of short, and it shows off her rack, but she doesn't look all that different from the way she usually does, so I don't get what the big deal is. Melinda walks through the living room, and Danny asks Wes what in the hell he's doing. Wes tries to remind Danny of the internet thing, and Danny says that he would have picked Melinda. She walks into the room and Danny gets upset. Wes tells the girls that they all look hot tonight, and that it makes it difficult for him to encourage them to go out. Lacey walks out and...oh. It's kind of sad. Everyone else is wearing spaghetti straps and low-cut blouses and Lacey is dressed from head to toe in black, with very little skin showing, and then some sort of red sequined capelet over the top. She looks like a grandma. Melinda kisses Danny and he begs her not to leave. As the girls walk out, Danny says that he lost Melinda forever. Wes thinks tonight will be very important, and Danny wonders why Melinda has to dress like that on the night that he's going out to pick up chicks. Wes says that Melinda did it on purpose (probably true) and that all women are sneaky bitches (not really true).
And now it's time for the Most Awesome Thing I Saw on TV Last Week. The most awesome thing I saw on TV last week was one of the later episodes of Little House, after Laura got married but before James (Jason Bateman! My crush begins!) and Cassandra showed up. So anyway, Laura was teaching the students about something stupid, and none of them knew the answers, and she was, like, the worst teacher ever with her leading questions and inappropriate anger, and of course Harriet Olson picked that moment to show up because some guy from the state board was coming, and his visit would determine whether the school got additional funding. So Harriet called a meeting of the school board (Pa, of course, Doc Baker, the Olsons, and two randoms) and argued that they needed to upgrade the curriculum and include French and art appreciation and Pa was like, "Why do farmers need art appreciation?" which, way to encourage education just for bettering yourself, Pa, and Laura said she couldn't really teach those subjects because apparently she was incapable of having the Pony Express or whatever deliver a book on those subjects, reading it herself, and then teaching the students, so of course Harriet stepped up and said she'd do it and then Laura got pissy and quit on the spot, and I really thought this was going to be the episode that Laura revealed she was pregnant because she was being such a bitch. And then I remembered that Laura's pregnancy was revealed in the same episode where Ma thought she was pregnant, but it was really "the change," thus leading to (on my initial viewing at like eight years old) an awkward conversation between me and my mother about the facts of life, and particularly, menopause. So Harriet took over the school and made the kids dress in uniforms, and Albert outsmarted her by putting coal dust on his ankles to simulate black stockings, like, wouldn't the fact that his leg hair was totally poking out be her first clue? Meanwhile, Laura was using her newfound free time to cook elaborate meals for Almanzo, who kind of hated them, but tried to be nice, but Bitch On Wheels Laura must have been taking lessons from Old School Nellie because she got pissy and flounced out, and Almanzo had a hilarious callback joke to the cinnamon chicken incident. And then Albert found out that some other kids were planning to screw up Harriet's big day in front of the guy from the state, so he ratted them out to Laura and she went into the school and took over to help Harriet out, and they got their funding, and no one cared about French anymore, or art, because they were just poor farmers who were never going to leave the town limits, or have to talk to anyone from Canada or whatever, and it was awesome.
Danny and the guys go out. Wes interviews something stupid about how great it is with Danny and the cheerleaders there. Meanwhile, the girls are going out for a fancy dinner and martinis, which looks really boring. The guys drink lots of shots. The girls leave the restaurant and head to a bar or something. Melinda interviews that her big fear is that Danny will kiss another girl. Some chick in the bar tells Danny that he's really cute, and Danny shakes his head. Nehemiah interviews that he thinks Danny wants other girls besides Melinda. The girl, Steph, gives Danny her number and he kisses her neck. She asks for a kiss on the lips, and he says no.
The girls come home, and Melinda dives into the pool with her clothes on and talks about how drunk she is. Meanwhile, Danny and Wes are leaving their bar. Wes slurs that Crystal (the friend who told him last week that Rachel's date had a girlfriend?) showed up, and Danny thinks that's weak. Wes says that Crystal is "practice squad." Ouch. I guess she's not a friend anymore. Danny says that he's going home to check on Melinda. And by "check on," he clearly means "hook up with."
The guys walk home together. They all need belts, because their jeans are falling down. Danny interviews that he doesn't care about the chicks at the bar, and just wants to be with Melinda. Melinda has now put on a bathing suit, but she's still in the pool. Rachel walks by and says that the guy will be home soon, and Danny will tell Melinda he loves her. Melinda bets five dollars that he won't do that. Rachel says she'll kick Danny's ass if he brings home another girl. Melinda vows that, if Danny brings another girl home, she'll go back to the bar and fuck every guy she sees. Well, that's mature. And healthy.
Danny comes home and I swear to God his pants are now down below his ass cheeks and his underwear is just hanging out. How is that cute? Danny talks about how drunk he is. Rachel finds out from Wes that Danny didn't bring anyone home, so she tells Melinda that she owes her five dollars. Nehemiah and Danny have one of those perfect drunk conversations where Danny is like, "I had too many shots," and then Nehemiah is like, "As long as you don't throw up, we're good," and then Danny is like, "...[urp]" and Nehemiah is like, "You ready to throw up?" and Danny is like, "Yep" and Nehemiah says matter-of-factly, "Then let's go to the bathroom."
Danny heads into the toilet stall. Meanwhile, Melinda talks right into Wes's ear, but she's not whispering, so it's not clear why she's talking so close. Anyway, she says that she really likes Danny, but that she's willing to give him space if that's what he needs. Lacey comes in and reports that someone is puking, and Melinda runs off in her bikini to attend to her man. Melinda interviews that she wants to make sure Danny is okay, because she knows he would do the same for her. Okay, by the musical cue here, they're trying to make this out like it's super-romantic, but it's actually kind of gross. Melinda gets right down to the toilet seat with Danny and strokes his hair, and she must have a stronger stomach than I, because if I were drunk, or even if I weren't, that would totally make me puke. The smell!
The morning, the roommates get ready. Wes interviews that Danny is really hungover, which makes Wes know that he did a good job. Yeah! My friend got wasted! Lacey reports that the cabs are there, and everyone scrambles to get ready. Rachel interviews that they're going to meet with the organizers of SXSW.
Danny sits in a cab with Lacey and Wes and looks green. Danny says that he's taking Melinda to dinner, and that he wonders if it's a lost cause. Wes says that nothing bad happened last night that Danny needs to worry about, and Danny says he doesn't remember what happened. Lacey interviews that Wes and Danny are still drunk on the way to work. Danny says that he will reek of booze in their meeting, and he asks his roommates to keep him from talking because he's still drunk. Lacey asks, "What do you want me to do, poke your eye?" I kind of love Lacey, even if she is nosy and judgmental. I mean, I am too, so I guess I can't blame her for that.
The roommates arrive at their meeting. Lacey interviews that she's excited to learn more about SXSW and everything it contains. A woman named Elizabeth meets up with them and asks what they need to know. Lacey says that they need to know what they will be allowed to shoot. Lacey interviews that she feels like it's her job to make sure things get done, because she hates when tasks are unfinished and she hates when people are disappointed in her. I guess this is foreshadowing for the inevitable episode where everyone get pissed at Lacey for being such a taskmaster. The other roommates yawn and then leave.
In a confessional, Melinda says that Danny asked her out on a date for Valentine's Day, and that she doesn't know how to react. She says that she's never been out on a real Valentine's Day date.
Melinda and Danny hang out in the kitchen and discuss the night. Melinda says that she doesn't really remember anything, but that she knows she didn't make out with any guys. Danny says he only made out with four girls. He's clearly joking, but Melinda doesn't get it and tells him that she can't go out with him on their date because she has to wash her hair. Danny doesn't say anything. I thought he was joking. He was joking, right? Danny interviews that he doesn't want space from Melinda, and that he just loves being around her.
Danny mopes in the bathroom for a while, but must decide not to take a shower for sulking purposes. He goes into Melinda's room and admits that he didn't really kiss anybody last night. Melinda laughs and acts like she knew that all along, and agrees to go on the date with him.