In honor of the upcoming three-week break from this show, there will be no Most Awesome Thing this week. (No, that doesn't really make any sense, but there you have it.)
Karamo and Dorian have a conversation about how Karamo hates Whitey. Karamo explains that his father gave him all these books on the civil-rights movement when Karamo was nine or ten, but that no one ever explained to Karamo that those types of things weren't still happening today. So his father told him about the civil-rights movement, but didn't tell him the ways in which it succeeded? That's weird. I mean, the struggle for racial equality is far from over, don't get me wrong. Karamo interviews that he has "distrust issues with people outside of [his] race." Is "distrust" even a word? I looked it up, and it turns out that it is, but it's not an adjective, so that's why it sounded weird. It's a noun or a transitive verb. Anyway. Dorian says that some of his closest friends are white, and that they've never done anything to violate his trust. Karamo interviews that he's not used to dating guys like Dorian, and that while they have intellectual conversations, he needs something more. I think he means passion or a spark or something.
After Dorian leaves, Karamo talks over the situation with Willie, who thinks Dorian is a nice guy. Karamo smirks over the music Dorian listens to, which is '80s R&B. Karamo interviews that he "needs somebody who also embraces the hip-hop culture." Karamo tells Willie that when he's processing something, he paces, and it helps him think. Willie seems completely uninterested in what Karamo has to say. Karamo paces around the house.
Sarah talks to her mom on the phone. Sarah interviews that her mother has had leukemia since Sarah was seventeen, and that she's currently undergoing radiation therapy. Sarah's mom jokes about her radiation therapy. Sarah interviews that her mom fooled herself into thinking she could control it, and now it's out of control. Sarah's mom complains that her sense of taste is shot, and jokes about it some more. Sarah wipes away tears and stays silent.
Sarah tells MJ that her disordered eating started when she found out that her mom had cancer. Sarah thinks that she felt a lack of control over her life, and that the only thing she could control was her eating. MJ asks about Sarah's mom's cancer. Sarah says that her mom was originally told that she had five to ten years to live. MJ softly says he's sorry about that. Sarah says that many people deal with family illness without trying to destroy themselves, and that her mom wishes for health, and yet Sarah undermines her own health. MJ asks if it was anorexia or bulimia. Sarah says it started as the former and continued as the latter but, when MJ asks, tells him that she hasn't done it in months. MJ interviews that he's been around a lot of women with eating disorders, and that he understands what Sarah is dealing with.
Karamo meets up with Brie, his ex-girlfriend, who is pretty hot. Karamo interviews that he and Brie dated in college, and that he hasn't seen her in two years, although they have maintained a friendship. Karamo and Brie hug, and then walk down the street holding hands. I forget that Karamo has been out of college for four years, because he seems younger to me. I was surprised that he had a girlfriend in college, until I remembered that it was almost five years ago.
Brie and Karamo go to the African American Museum of Philadelphia (which, if I remember correctly, Dorian told Karamo about in the first place). Brie says that she feels ignorant because she's never been there and apparently lives in the area. In a confessional, Karamo says that he sees a lot in Philadelphia about liberty and justice, but that the founding fathers had slaves. Karamo reminds Brie about the time they all marched on the Capitol. As they examine the exhibits, Brie comments that they don't look back enough, and Karamo agrees.
Brie and Karamo go out to dinner. Brie says that it's weird going out to dinner with Karamo, because they never did that when they were together. Karamo points out that they were poor freshmen. Good point. I don't think I went to a restaurant more fancy than Denny's in my entire college career, unless my parents were visiting (and paying). Karamo interviews that he didn't sleep with any men while he was dating Brie, and that when they broke up, he told her that he liked men more than he liked women. He thinks that his honesty is why they are able to stay friends. Brie asks Karamo if he loves his boyfriend. Karamo says that he and Dorian are "just talking," and that he doesn't know if it will work. Karamo says that he wants more of a hip-hop type, and Dorian is more...at which point, Karamo trails off. Brie supplies, "A Banana Republic?" Karamo agrees, and thinks that Dorian listens to too much pop music. Brie points out that you can't just dismiss someone based on music choice. Karamo says that it's a big part of his life, and that he listens to music a lot. Brie asks if Karamo has exposed Dorian to his favorite music. Karamo dismisses the topic by saying, "We'll see."
Karamo says goodbye to Brie and interviews that it was a relief to hang out with someone who knows him well. I think Karamo is really immature in a lot of ways. I mean, who breaks up with someone just because of his or her taste in music? Karamo probably has really valid reasons why he is incompatible with Dorian, not the least of which is that they want different levels of commitment, and Karamo is just using the music thing as an excuse. For someone who just told us how his honesty saved his relationship with Brie, he's not being very honest with Dorian, or with himself.
Sarah answers the phone, and her sister Rachel says that they are coming to Philadelphia. Sarah is like, "Oh." Rachel adds, "We'll be there in an hour." Whoa. Sarah asks why they didn't tell her earlier, and Rachel says that they just decided to do it. Sarah interviews that her mom and sister have decided to stop over on their way to New York, and that she wasn't expecting to see them. Sarah sighs, and Rachel tells her not to act annoyed. Sarah says that she's not, but that it's short notice and she has to work tomorrow. Rachel responds, "Well, fine. Be a bitch." Sarah's voice goes up two octaves as she protests that it's her job. Rachel snaps that they'll stay in Philadelphia and not see her. Sarah says that she wants to see them, and asks what she's supposed to do. Sarah interviews that she's blindsided by this and wants to see her mother, but also doesn't want to see her mother while she's undergoing treatment. Sarah has never seen her mother ill before, and while she knows it's selfish, Sarah can't help feeling that way. Sarah's mom gets on the phone and asks if she can get out of work. Sarah pouts that she can't, and gets off the phone quickly. I think that Sarah could have been a little more gracious about it, but I can understand, even setting aside her mother's illness, why she was taken aback by the short notice.
Sarah tells Melanie what just happened. Melanie thinks Sarah will be happy to see her family. Sarah shrugs and complains that she didn't get any warning. MJ walks through and comments that Sarah seems to be in a bad mood. Sarah says she doesn't like seeing her mom without any hair, and Melanie agrees that would be hard. Sarah interviews that being in Philadelphia is an escape for her, and that she's in a bubble.
Sarah runs to her room and gets into bed to cry. Sarah interviews that she's upset that she's crying, and she's upset that she doesn't want to see her own mother whom she loves more than anything.
Melanie walks by and sees Sarah crying in bed. She goes in and asks if Sarah wants to be alone. Sarah apparently says no, because Melanie lies down on the bed and says that it must be hard for Sarah to think about seeing her mom when she's sick. Sarah says that she's able to avoid many things in her life while she's away. Melanie interviews that Sarah wants to avoid dealing with her mom's illness, and that Melanie can relate because she did the same thing when her grandmother was sick. Melanie tells Sarah to let herself be upset. Sarah interviews that she knows it will be good for her to see her mother, and to get used to seeing her when she's sick.
Sarah calls her mom and asks if they've had dinner yet. They haven't. Sarah suggests that they go out, and that they can meet at the house. Sarah also finds out that her father is with her mother and sister. They make arrangements and hang up.
Sarah waits outside until her family's car pulls up. Rachel gets out first and hugs Sarah, commenting that she seems happier to see them now. Sarah says that she's fine. Sarah interviews that she and her sister are opposites, but that they have that sisterly bond. Sarah hugs her mom, who jokes that she's feeling bald. Sarah checks out her mom's missing hair. Her mom laughs and says that she'll survive. Sarah's mom has a great attitude, I must say.
At the restaurant, they talk some more about the radiation therapy. Sarah gets quiet and says that she's glad she didn't have to see it. Her mom offers up some of her meal to Sarah, claiming that she has a hard time eating anything. Sarah takes a few bites of her mom's salad. In a confessional, Sarah cries really hard as she says that she can't control her mom's cancer, nor many other things, and that's what drives her obsession with her body and her self-criticism. Sarah points out to her father how buff she is getting. Rachel butts in and asks if Sarah has thrown up. Sarah is offended that Rachel would even ask that. Rachel says she just wants to make sure that Sarah is healthy, and laughs. Sarah's dad asks Rachel, "Why would you do that?" Sarah gets pissed as she lists off how healthy she's being. Sarah says sharply that Rachel knows how Sarah's face looks when she's throwing up, and that Sarah's face isn't bloated. Sarah interviews that she's close with her sister and loves her to death, but that she can't understand how Rachel thinks and acts sometimes. I think Rachel wanted some attention, and wanted to make herself look better at Sarah's expense. Sarah's family walks her home and then takes off.
Karamo naps in his bed. Dorian calls, and Willie wakes Karamo up to tell him that Dorian is on his way over. Karamo groans and tells Willie to say that he'll call Dorian back. Willie asks if he should tell Dorian to come anyway. Karamo says he'll call Dorian back. Willie reports the news to Dorian, and Karamo goes back to sleep.
Some time later, Dorian walks into Karamo's room and wakes him up. Damn. That's a bit presumptuous. My husband wouldn't even do that to me, unless it was really important. Dorian tells Karamo to get up, because Dorian brought his best friend over to meet him. Karamo asks Dorian to give him a few minutes. Karamo interviews that he hates people stopping over unexpectedly, and that he also hates when people wake him up.
Karamo gets up and goes downstairs to meet Dorian's friend Steve. Dorian asks how Karamo is doing, and Karamo says he's been better. Karamo interviews that he's not going to tell Dorian how annoyed he is. Dorian realizes that something is wrong and asks Karamo what's up. Karamo complains about how bad his headache is, and says that he can't go out with them tonight. He suggests that Steve and Dorian go out with MJ and Landon instead. Karamo leaves to go back to sleep. Dorian totally knows something is up as Karamo crawls back into bed.
MJ and Landon gather up Dorian and Steve to go out. Willie tells Karamo that he's being rude, and the worst host. Karamo laughs, and says with a smirk that he has a headache. Karamo interviews that he's happy that MJ and Landon are hanging out with Dorian and Steve tonight, so that he doesn't have to. MJ, Landon, Dorian, and Steve leave for the club.
Now comes the part where Karamo went really, really wrong. I can sort of accept not wanting to make a big scene while Steve was there, and faking a headache to put off the inevitable confrontation, if he was planning on having it out with Dorian at a later date. But now Karamo changes his clothes and goes out to a club with Willie. That's so wrong. It's like my mom used to tell me: if you're too sick to go to school, you're too sick to do something fun. If Karamo's going to fake a headache, he needs to commit to the fakery.
Karamo and Willie arrive at a club. Willie interviews that it was really shady. Karamo says that he's annoyed with Dorian, and that he thinks they could be great friends. Willie says that sometimes Karamo changes his mind, and Karamo says that's because he's lonely. If by "lonely," you mean "horny." Karamo interviews that he forces feelings for Dorian because he wants companionship. If by "companionship," you mean "sex." Willie asks why Karamo feels this way, and Karamo says it's partly Dorian's personality, and also that Dorian stopped by. But what about the all-important musical taste category? Karamo likes Jay-Z and Dorian likes Boyz II Men. That's a breach that cannot be repaired.
Willie and Karamo walk home, and Karamo says that he hopes he doesn't run into Steve and Dorian. Meanwhile, it's 2:30 AM and Dorian and Steve are back at the house, waiting for Karamo to return. Dorian asks Sarah why he's there and Karamo isn't. Dude, don't drag Sarah into your relationship problems. I'm starting to see why Karamo is annoyed. I don't think Karamo is handling it the right way, but I see why he's annoyed. In a confessional, Sarah says that Dorian is great, and that she knows that Karamo is hot and cold, but that he needs to step up and take some responsibility.
Dorian leaves the house. Meanwhile, Willie and Karamo are still walking home. Willie says that Karamo always changes his mind, and asks whether Karamo has feelings for Dorian. Willie interviews that it's unfair for Karamo to lead Dorian on. Word, Willie. After all that build-up, Karamo never sees Dorian, and arrives home safely.
At 3:10 AM, Dorian calls for Karamo. Karamo laughs and tells MJ that it's supposed to be easier to date guys, and that he shouldn't have to deal with this girly shit. Yeah, like demanding to be treated with some respect. I have some advice for Dorian: he's just not that into you. I watched the repeat of Oprah last week with the authors of that book, and I only wish it had been around when I was sixteen, because man, would I have saved myself a lot of wasted energy making excuses for lame guys.
Karamo takes the phone call. Dorian recaps the events of the evening. Karamo makes the excuse that he felt he could go out with Willie and chill out, whereas Dorian and Steve were going to a "hectic" club that would only exacerbate his headache. Karamo adds that Steve would have thought he was an asshole because he wasn't in a social mood. I think Steve already thinks you're an asshole, Karamo. Dorian says that he's never seen this side of Karamo before, and asks if he's being played. Karamo interviews that they're not in a relationship. Karamo denies playing Dorian, who says that he feels like Karamo is worth having in his life. Karamo thinks they should have this conversation in person that time they see each other, and they hang up.
Sarah says goodbye to her parents and hugs her mom. Sarah checks out her mom's bald spot and strokes it tenderly. Sarah interviews that it's still hard to deal with her mom's illness, but that she wants her mom to know that her daughter is okay. Rachel is carrying some sort of animal in a carrier -- a cat? Maybe that's the reason for the trip in the first place?
Sarah tells Melanie that when she found out her mom was sick, she mourned. Melanie says that Sarah shouldn't do that, and should try to find a way to deal with it that works. Melanie adds that Sarah doesn't want to forget about her mom or deny what her mom is going through. Sarah interviews that she agrees that she shouldn't bottle up her emotions, but that she's used to her emotions being private. Sarah says that talking about it makes it more real. Melanie suggests that Sarah write her feelings down, because sometimes that's easier than saying them out loud. In a confessional, Sarah says that she knows that she needs to change. Melanie tells Sarah that she's always there for her.
Dorian comes over to see Karamo for the showdown. Karamo suggests that they go outside. Karamo is armed in his best hip-hop outfit, and he looks like a twelve-year-old in his oversized striped polo shirt, giant jeans, and sideways cap. Karamo interviews that he's really good at verbally expressing his viewpoints, but not his emotions.
Karamo and Dorian sit on a bench outside. Dorian says that Karamo has misrepresented himself. Karamo wonders how he made Dorian feel bad for having feelings. Dorian tells him to cut the shit, and that he doesn't play games. Karamo seizes on this as a reason just to be friends. Dorian says that Karamo has the ability to accomplish whatever he wants, but then goes into this lecture about how Karamo's actions need to match his words. Karamo has totally checked out at this point. I don't know who Dorian is performing for, except the cameras. Karamo says that it's bullshit, and Dorian just keeps repeating smugly, "Be true to yourself." Karamo walks away, and Dorian sits on the bench alone. Karamo interviews that he's not happy with the way things ended with Dorian, but that's life. He's learned to be honest with himself, and to admit that he doesn't want a relationship right now. Well, he also needs to be honest with his partner, which is the important thing.