Willie opens a can of soup, and they seriously linger so long on the soup that I thought it was going to be a plot point. Like maybe Willie and Melanie get into an argument over whether or not the soup is condensed. Willie wants to add a can of water before heating it up, and Melanie says he should eat it right out of the can with no addition. What? Like there haven't been dumber arguments in the history of this show. Sarah walks into the kitchen and just yells, "Dorian, the guy who works at the gym." Yeah, what about him? Willie wants to know if he's gay, and Sarah says she doesn't know, but that he's cute. Karamo, grinning wide, interviews that Dorian signed them all up at the gym, and that he doesn't know Dorian that well. Karamo describes Dorian as "black, tall, and muscular." Karamo interviews that he's sexually frustrated, and that he needs the affection of a man "very, very soon." Karamo plays a videogame which my husband identifies as either Super Street Fighter 2, Super Street Fighter 2 Turbo, or Super Street Fighter 2 Turbo Championship Edition. He suggests that I make it a poll, so I will, and you guys can let me know. Anyway, this videogame involves Karamo furiously pounding buttons to make two guys hump each other. Huh. Maybe I'll have to get into this game, once I find out what it is.
Karamo, Sarah, and Melanie go to the gym, which is called the Philadelphia Sports Clubs. Melanie agrees to go inside for a tour. Karamo introduces her to Dorian. In an interview, Karamo grins some more and sings out, "Doooooriaaaaaan! I like Dorian." Karamo is so cute when he has a crush. You can just feel the happiness. Dorian gives Melanie a tour of the facility, and Karamo tags along, even though he's presumably a member and already knows where everything is. Melanie signs up and they say goodbye. Outside, Melanie says that Dorian is cute, and that he and Karamo would be a good-looking couple. She teases Karamo about only going to the gym to see Dorian. Karamo denies it, laughing. Busted!
Melanie interviews that part of their job will be building a playground for kids. The roommates head to the Northern Home for Children and meet Donna and Laura. Sarah interviews that Northern Home works with kids in the community. Donna explains that many of the kids have "pretty upsetting backgrounds" but that they are "sponges for love," and that a smile will win them over. Willie interviews that the kids don't have much positivity or love in their lives, and that the roommates' job is really rewarding. The roommates play basketball with the kids. Landon interviews that he feels fortunate to be a part of this. MJ is really sweaty. Like his formerly light gray shirt is now dark gray with sweat. And I get that he was running around, but no one else is that sweaty. He should have just removed his shirt to play basketball. Then everyone wins!
The roommates ride home in their van, Landon at the wheel. There is a lot of traffic. They try to find their exit, and miss it. Melanie groans and sighs, even though Landon would have had to break numerous traffic laws to make the exit, since they spotted it like two seconds before he reached it. Landon tells Melanie to "shut the fuck up," and Melanie says, "Fuck you, bitch." In a confessional, Melanie says that she's over Landon's pissiness. Melanie tells Landon to chill out, because he said "fuck you" for no reason. MJ reminds Melanie that she says it every day, and Melanie claims it's not with the same amount of animosity. How do you get to be twenty-something years old and not realize that no one likes a back-seat driver? And that the person behind the wheel, especially in heavy traffic, needs to be treated with respect. At least until you reach your destination, at which point all bets are off. Melanie is rude, and an idiot. The other roommates all look uncomfortable. Shavonda is sitting on MJ's lap, which seems unsafe.
Landon and MJ walk down the street. Landon says he's mad at Melanie for the way she bitches him out all the time. MJ says that everyone is mad. Landon thinks he is the butt of her attacks more often than not. Landon interviews that he's overly sensitive. MJ suggests that Landon tell Melanie that it hurts his feelings. MJ thinks that Melanie will roll her eyes, and he demonstrates, but in the end, Melanie will hear it. MJ interviews that they are all fed up with Melanie, and that she needs to relax. MJ jokes that the moral of the story is that Landon should punch Melanie in the nose, kick her in the teeth, and tell her to fuck off. Well, it's not like we haven't seen similar antics in past seasons. Why are they so reasonable this season? When are they going to start throwing forks?
That night, Willie and Karamo go to a club. Karamo looks miserable hanging out with Willie's friends, so he says that he's going to go look around. Karamo interviews that he wants someone to share Philadelphia with, but hasn't found him yet. Karamo just happens to run into Dorian. Surprise! They have to stand very close to hear each other over the loud music, but neither guy is complaining. Karamo says that he thought Dorian was straight, and Dorian replies, "Not by a long shot." Karamo interviews that he doesn't know why he assumed Dorian wasn't gay, but that was the attraction. Well, at least he's honest. And consistent. Dorian invites Karamo to the African-American Museum, and then Karamo invites Dorian to the dance floor. Once they are out there, things get hot. So hot that Dorian has to peel off his shirt, with Karamo's help. Willie interviews that Karamo seems happy to dance with Dorian. Karamo and Dorian grind their pelvises into each other and...oh, my. They are quite a hot couple. Although Karamo is kind of ruining it by wearing a fleece pullover while Dorian is shirtless. Karamo voice-overs that he thinks he might have feelings for Dorian. Willie ruins the fun by interrupting to tell Karamo that they need to go. Dorian and Karamo say goodbye and make plans for the day. Once they get outside, Willie celebrates with Karamo.
Karamo and Willie take a cab home and discuss how cute Dorian is. Willie gives Karamo a kiss on the cheek, which I found sweet, because it shows that despite their initial misgivings, these two are becoming friends. Willie says he's been hanging out with Dan's friends. Karamo says he's supposed to see Dorian tomorrow, and maybe he and Willie will both be getting action. Willie laughs.
The roommates head back to the Northern Home to meet with some guy named Anthony, who explains that they are going to walk the grounds and select a location for the playground. In a confessional, Landon says that this is what he's been going to school for. Landon describes why one area would be good, but Melanie won't let him get through one sentence before whining, "I don't like this area." She proceeds to say "I don't like it" about ten more times, while Landon is talking about "retaining wall" and "high use area" and other terminology that proves he's either an expert in this field, or good at faking it. Willie interviews that Melanie is annoying. Willie calmly says, "We're just discussing options, honey. Let him talk." Melanie gets all offended, even though she was just ten times ruder to Landon than Willie was to her. Willie wasn't even a little bit rude to her. Melanie interviews that people may think she's bitchy or opinionated, but that she likes those things about herself. Too bad no one else does. There's having an opinion and convictions, and then there's being rude, and Melanie is the latter. As they walk off, Melanie tells Willie he was mean, and Willie tells Melanie that she was being rude. Melanie gets all huffy about it.
Later, Willie and Sarah take a cab. Willie talks about how annoying Melanie was. Willie interviews that once Melanie has an idea, she won't hear anything else or anyone else's opinions. Willie says he asked Melanie to let Landon talk, and Melanie accused him of being mean. Willie doesn't think he's mean. Sarah says that Melanie is assertive, but that she can't take it when anyone else behaves the same way. Sarah interviews that Melanie has to find a balance between being "a strong female" and "overzealous about her opinions." Was Sarah just the voice of reason? Sarah? What is going on? Willie says that he's opinionated, but that he's not rude, and Sarah agrees.
Willie calls Dan on the phone. Willie interviews that Dan is "a personal flight attendant," and I don't know what that means, but it sounds dirty. Anyway, Dan flies all over the world and is rarely home. Dan suggests that when he arrives, they can "nappy-nappy." I don't know. Willie says he's going to get started, and Dan can finish with him. Why do I get the feeling they're not talking about getting some shut-eye? Willie interviews that he's never been in a long-distance relationship, but that he adores Dan to pieces. Willie is taking a nap when Dan walks in and crawls into bed with him. They kiss hello and then go back to sleep. I'd like to believe that there was some footage cut out in the middle.
Later, Dan pours champagne for Willie and himself. They discuss how happy they are, and kiss. And kiss again. Karamo walks onto the balcony and sees Dorian arriving downstairs. Karamo interviews that it's his first date with Dorian, and that he's happy they're going out.
Karamo and Dorian sit at an outdoor café and discuss being gay. Dorian says he went from being a college athlete and ladies' man to "some gay guy," but that he's learned that you have to be true to yourself. Karamo says that he had to come out to his family before he left. He explains that he's the youngest, and has three older sisters, and they all cried. His mother was cool, but his father went crazy and said that Karamo wasn't his son. Karamo interviews that he comes from a religious Caribbean background that doesn't accept homosexuality. Dorian tells Karamo not to be ashamed of himself. They walk down the street. Karamo interviews that it's one thing to hear that someone is gay, but it's another thing to see him or her being gay. In other words, no kissing or holding hands for Karamo and Dorian. Did Karamo forget this little rule when he was bumping genitals in the club? I guess he was just drunk. Karamo and Dorian shake hands, and Karamo literally runs away. Heh.
Back at the house, Karamo and Dan discuss the situation. Karamo says he can't be himself on camera. Willie interviews that Karamo feels like he has to hide his sexuality. Dan points out that Karamo knew he'd be on camera when he agreed to be on the show. Karamo says he planned to be celibate for four months. Dan says Karamo has to deal with some shit. Karamo agrees and says that his way of dealing with it is to not deal with it. Karamo thinks this is a great idea. Dan? Not so much.
And now it's time for the Most Awesome Thing I Saw on TV Last Week. The most awesome thing I saw on TV last week was yet another airing of The Blue Lagoon on TBS. I remember watching this movie as a kid, and being kind of thrilled because it seemed dirty, even though I was watching it on network television so all the dirty parts were cut out. Now that I think about it, I don't know if I've ever seen the uncut version. I'll have to remedy that. Anyway, in case you haven't seen it, it's the story of two kids, Richard and Emmeline, who are shipwrecked on a desert island with a crusty old dude named Paddy. See, they had to have the old dude along so it would be plausible that these kids could even remotely survive into their teens, and once they become teens...look out! Richard is constantly playing with himself, and Emmeline just thinks about God. But then they totally do it, although I was kind of wondering how they figured that one out. I mean, I know it's natural and all, but if you had no idea what sex was, or what was going on, and yet you had some sense of morality from being a child in the Victorian era, the whole sex thing just seemed implausible to me. And yet, Emmeline gets pregnant, even though she has no idea that she's pregnant. And they are remarkably not freaked out when the baby starts moving. I would think I ate a bug or something and it was growing inside me. So Emmeline gives birth and there's this mysterious tribe on the other side of the island, but that never really amounts to anything, which is pretty lame, because I assume they were cannibals. And then they go to a nearby island to get food or something and Emmeline just lets the baby wander into the boat and they drift out to sea together, and Richard tries to rescue them, but he loses the oars in the process because he's being chased by a shark. It was totally Emmeline's fault, and she was pretty whiny the whole time anyway. So then the baby eats these poison berries, and then Richard and Emmeline decide to kill themselves since they're lost at sea anyway and now their baby is dead. And then they get rescued by Albert Einstein (or someone who looked just like him) and they're not dead, just sleeping. Which seems like a huge cop-out and made me wonder if they added that ending after test audiences thought it was too depressing. Because just having them die would have been awesome.
Karamo and Dan continue their conversation. Dan thinks that Karamo is making a rash decision. Karamo says he's shy about sex. Dan tells Karamo just to let it go. Karamo interviews that Dan is giving him courage. Dan says that sometimes things are worth the pressure and the angst, like Dorian. Karamo interviews that he knows he needs to work on it.
The roommates are in the van again. And Melanie is complaining again. This time, she's upset that they are going to be late. MJ interviews that Mel is confrontational, and that people have let her get away with it in the past. Melanie continues to rant, "So not cool, guys. So not cool." Finally, Willie snaps, "Okay! We know!" I love Willie. He totally just said what everyone else in the van is clearly thinking.
The roommates arrive at the Northern Home and apologize for being late. The bosses totally don't care. Landon interviews that they are going around with Donna, Anthony, and a bunch of kids to visit various playgrounds and see what the kids like. MJ talks to one kid to get ideas. He suggests "a water fountain that has chocolate milk," and the kid says that he wants fruit punch. MJ interviews that some of the kids are requesting silly things, like a sauna. Heh. How do those kids even know what a sauna is? Karamo runs after some kids and looks like he's having the time of his life.
MJ, Willie, Karamo, and Shavonda are in the van, and they stop to get gas. Willie says that Melanie negates everything the others say. Shavonda agrees that Melanie gives her opinion when no one asked for it. Shavonda adds that she really liked Melanie during their first week, but now she's over it. MJ says that they all have their little annoyances, and that Melanie doesn't want to be portrayed as the bitch, so she gets upset when people point out on camera that she's being bitchy. That's quite an astute observation for a lunkhead like MJ. Karamo gets out to pump the gas. Willie says he hates when people pretend to be something they're not. Karamo. Okay, he doesn't say Karamo's name, but you know everyone is thinking it. Shavonda says that Mel is always mean to Landon. Karamo asks if there is a consensus about the others in the house, and Shavonda says that everyone in the house is annoyed by Melanie, and that's it.
Karamo talks to Dorian on the phone and they make plans to go out. They arrive at a totally empty restaurant. Karamo talks about their job, and how they're designing a playground. He explains that his roommates were all scoping out sites, and that he couldn't stop playing with the kids. Karamo wants the kids to know that they can talk to and trust him. Dorian thinks that's commendable, because while Karamo may look tough, he's really sensitive. Karamo interviews that now he feels like he has someone to share his fears and dreams with. Karamo and Dorian sit by some water and talk. Karamo interviews that Dorian wants a friend he can trust, and that Karamo will be that friend.
That night, Karamo and Dorian walk down the street holding hands. The camera focuses in on their hands, and I'm surprised that they didn't put in a big arrow pointing to it. Karamo voice-overs that Dan's advice has inspired him to be more affectionate. Karamo and Dorian go back to the house, and sit on the couch talking and holding hands. Karamo gives Dorian a kiss, and then they totally start making out and it is hot. Karamo interviews that Dorian is a great guy, and that he could see them being together for a long time. They end the shot with Karamo laying his head on Dorian's chest while Dorian plays with his hair. Aw! They are sweet together.