God woke up!
This challenge calls upon the designers to pull inspiration from their inner bodyguards-slash-prostitutes and design costumes for the "Divas" from WWE Raw. It is actually not at all as gross as it sounds. It is maybe amazing? The designers meet their muses as they are battling in a wrestling ring and they all seem genuinely terrified. The Divas introduce themselves and describe the themes of their personas; then the designers choose who they would be working with.
Christian, per usual, gets it immediately. He designs this leather-and-lace number that was smokin'. The schizophrenic Christian edit is on its meds this week -- all of the designers seem really entertained by him. Jillian doesn't have time management problems this week. Chris obviously could do this challenge with his eyes closed. In fact, the longer this season goes on, the wider Chris's mouth seems to be opened in repose and the squintier his eyes get. Exhaustion?
Sweet P seems to be coming to the end of her time on the show. She's more and more frantic every week. She can't seem to grasp the drama of this challenge and says as much, which is weird to me considering she is so heavily inked. Aren't tattoos dramatic? Rami drapes this little number in pink that all of the judges hate. I don't know if it's his fault as much as it is the reaction to his muse, who seemed totally effing crazy. In the end, Chris wins his first challenge! He points out how appropriate it is that he would win the tackiest challenge to date.
And: Ricky. Oh, Ricky. You have cheated death for the last time, my little crying hatter. He is reviled for his scattered vision that results in a weird bathing suit with a hair-cutting smock. So, he is eliminated. And he doesn't cry. Ricky, you confound us!
Previously: The designers had to create an iconic look from old Levis. Jillian almost lost her mind due to exhaustion. Victorya was sent home for not really creating anything at all. Ricky won the challenge. Project Runway viewers lost their minds.
It's morning at the New Gotham apartments, and Jillian tells Sweet P that they can't let the final three (four?) be all boys? She further interviews that she would be very disappointed to have made it this far in the competition and not get to show in Bryant Park. Agreed. I don't think there's any real danger of her not making it though. I'm still struck by how the elimination of each new designer emphasizes Jillian's robotron qualities. She's such a little weirdo.
In the boys' apartment, Rami and Christian are talking in one of the bedrooms. Rami notes that the competition is "almost over" and Christian adds that there are some "hot messes" in the final six. He says that Ricky's winning garment from the last challenge had ruffles attached to the bottom and it wasn't even seamed. Rami giggles at Christian's comments. Even though it seems to never really happen, I'm interested to see if anyone calls him on his behind-the-back nastiness at the reunion show.
Meanwhile, Ricky says that his win in the last challenge didn't really go far towards earning him respect from the other designers, but winning taught him that he doesn't care what other people think (judges excepted, I'm assuming). He's wearing a trucker cap in the interview. One mannequin says to the other, "Do you remember when Ashton Kutcher was relevant?" The other says, "No." I wonder if Ricky made that cap.
At Parsons, Heidi enters the runway wearing a knee-high shiny cocktail dress. She brings on the models for the winning and losing models from the last challenge. Ricky decides to stay with Amanda, which means that Jacqueline, Victorya's model, goes home. Everyone seems really sad about this. Jillian interviews that Jacqueline was very talented and it's a disappointment to see her leave. That's interesting. I feel like the designers this season as a whole are more high fashion-y and the model competition has been an example of that (though, of course, the professional models have actually modeled in fewer challenges than ever before). Several times this season, we've seen the designers discuss the models (and traded, see: Leah) in such a way that it's clear they really respect the finer points of modeling and what a good model can contribute. I'm not sure I see what they see all the time, but I admire their appreciation of the nuances.
Heidi asks the designers if they are ready for their challenge. They are. She says that's just too damn bad they'll have to wait. That night, at the apartments, Sweet P asks everyone what they think the challenge will be. She thinks it might be a cocktail dress, since that's what Heidi was wearing on the runway. Rami wonders if it might be a celebrity. Then, Sweet P says it could be designing a swimsuit for Sports Illustrated. Rami replies, "Ew." Goodness.
The morning, Tim greets the designers in the workroom. They're going on another "field trip." Chris interviews that they were all suspicious about where they would be going. At the elevators, Christian asks Tim if they are going someplace fabulous. They are. Then, Christian asks if this place will also be fierce. "It had better be fierce, Tim." So precocious, I could just squeeze him to death. Back to Chris, he says that he has wondered if they might be designing for drag queens. Wondered/wished, potato/potahto. In the elevator, Jillian says that she hopes they don't have to run today, because her heels are six inches high. Christian points out that they had to run in another challenge as well. Yeah, what's the deal with that?
The field trip is as far as the room where the runway is. They step out of the elevator and walk towards the doors and there are all of these grunts and screams coming from inside the runway room. Nina's lunchtime? It's a mystery. Jillian says that is was "crazy war noise" that sounded "violent and scary." "Crazy war noise" is a new favorite of mine. Not sure when I'll be able to use it, but I will. The designers are so freaked out. Tim begins his preamble about how this is the runway, blah, blah, but it doesn't sound like anyone's really listening. Sweet P interviews that it sounds like people are killing each other from inside the room. Christian thinks that it sounds like sex moans. Sex is war.
They finally enter the room and there are women wrestling in a ring where the runway usually is. Rami interviews that he didn't know where this was going, and it was like watching a train wreck happen. Well, I know exactly what they're doing the minute I see the women, but I love thinking of where Rami's mind could be going. What if they have to make wedding dresses for them? Business suits? Nun habits? Chris says that it was pretty great watching the women kick the shit out of each other. These girls are scantily clad.
Tim rings the ringside bell and the ladies stop killing each other. Tim introduces them as the Divas of World Wrestling Entertainment. Tim enters the ring and says, "Grandpa has difficulty with these ropes." I love him. He says that he's borrowing a word from Christian and that the Divas are "fierce indeed." Christian recommends that Tim "work it out." The Divas introduce themselves. The first is Maria. She says that her style is "rock glam." Torrie Wilson says that she is "the epitome of the All-American good girl." Hmm. Kristal says that she likes leather and lace. Michelle McCool says that she is also an All-American girl, but she is also very interested in sports. Layla El says that she is very funky and she is also a professional dancer. Then, she does a high kick. She must be a professional dancer. Candice Michelle says that she is your current WWE women's champion. Thank you for representing all of us, Candice Michelle. For all of your hard work, you will be rewarded with a last name. Candice says that she is also known as the "sex kitten" and then she rips open her shiny robe to reveal her red bikini top and tight red vinyl pants. Classy. Okay, so they all told us their wildly varying styles, but they all basically look like they came from the first page of a Playboy pictorial. Those are all clothes that are meant to be taken off.
No surprise, Tim tells them that their challenge is to create something for the Divas to wear in the ring. I just realized why the challenge was no surprise. Project Runway is so much about product placement these days, and they wouldn't be designing something that took your attention from the brand that the Divas represent. "Product placement" is considered such a dirty phrase, but the truth is, fashion is so much about marketing and finances, even at the highest, most seemingly successful level. I don't think many designers can take for granted the benefit of tagging your brand to another well-known brand. It might seem cheap to some people that so many of the challenges have been branding exercises (i.e. Steve and Barry's, Hershey's, Levi's, WWE, etc.), but it seems pretty reasonable to me given the industry. Each of the designers gets to choose the Diva that they want to work with.
Because he was the winner of the last challenge, Ricky chooses Layla as his Diva. Ricky says in an interview that he picked Layla because she looked Latina and he got a "little vibe" from her. Tim picks Jillian's name and she chooses Michelle. Chris chooses Maria. Christian chooses Kristal. Sweet P chooses Candice, who responds by screaming and grinding herself in a circle. That leaves Torrie, and Rami tells her that she's stuck with him.
Designers and Divas make their way to the workroom. Tim tells them that they'll have 30 minutes to work together before the designers go to Spandex House to buy supplies. I shit you not, they are going to Spandex House. They will have $100 for the challenge.
We see Chris tell Maria that everyone is thinking that they are just making "stripper tranny wear." Hmm, not sure that's such a complimentary thing to say. She's cool though and replies, "Partially stripper tranny." Partially, because they have vaginas. And they're not actually strippers. Chris notes and Maria concurs that she has an affinity for leopard print. Mrow.
Torrie tells Rami that she projects "innocence, but still sexy." Maybe innocent of capital murder, but who's she kidding? Rami seems a bit flummoxed. He says it's not a very fashionable challenge, but he still needs to make her happy.
Candice Michelle seriously tells Sweet P that she's the "classy sexpot" and not the "whore sexpot." Have these women been in a sensory deprivation chamber? How could they be so wrong about what words mean? Sweet P doesn't even look her in the eye. She interviews that all of the sparkly stuff on Candice Michelle's outfit "scared the shit" out of her. "I just don't even get it!" she screams. I've never liked her more, for some reason. I like that Sweet P just puts it out there when she doesn't know what the hell she's doing.
Christian is cruising along with Kristal. It looks like they agree on chaps (or "a chap" as Christian says, dear God) with cutouts. Ricky suggests gold fabric to Layla and she seems to be into that. He interviews that anything can be fashion when you are designing for someone else, whether it's spandex or an evening gown. First of all, bullshit. Second of all, it sounds like the producers asked the designers, "Is this challenge about fashion?" and made them answer back with the question in the answer, because who gives a pop? Weird question. And, shouldn't Ricky be crying by now? He and Layla agree on a one piece.
All of the Divas hug their designers, then they're off to Spandex House. I love that Spandex House exists. Chris finds what he wants immediately. Everyone, in fact, seems to find what they want.
The designers have the rest of that day and all of the day for the challenge. Jillian watches DVD's (from BLOCKBUSTER -- okay, maybe it's time to rethink what I said earlier) of the Divas doing their wrestling thing. She's rooting on the women that she's watching, but she's kidding. She dryly announces to the little screen that she's watching, "If I design the wrong thing, she might body slam me." Doesn't Jillian remind you of the third female lead in a work place sitcom? Think about it. She says that spandex is difficult to sew.
Rami shows the fabric he purchased. It's crazy bright pink. "It's modest," he opposites. Everyone seems shocked. Rami thinks that Torrie is like Barbie. Maybe Prison Warden Barbie.
Christian is wearing the chaps that he made. He thinks they're hot. Sweet P shows the two fabrics that she bought and Christian cracks up. He interviews that hers were the ugliest fabrics in the room. "She looks like tranny ice queen!" he says. We still love him, right? Sweet P interviews that she just wants to make it to Bryant Park -- she won't let this "kooky" challenge take her out. She puts some feathers on her dress form, but decides that it's "too casino." Sweet P, don't let that "classy" suggestion from Candice bring you down! Casinos are too good for her!
The day, the designers file back into the workroom. We see a shot of Jillian doing a roundhouse kick on a dress form that is AMAZING. She looks like Wonder Woman! Chris says that he is not ashamed to make an outfit for a wrestler, but he knows that some other people aren't happy. And, here's Sweet P. She is not happy making a robe for Candice, but knows she has to. She decides on a puffed sleeve, because she thinks that will be less cheesy. Why is she trying to mute this design? You're designing for a woman whose job is to pretend that rubbing her boobies on other girls is really fighting. No need for discretion here.
Jillian is making a bra top and short shorts. Chris says that he wants his design to look like an animal in a cage. In the workroom, he says that if they were designing these outfits for men, he doesn't think anyone would have a problem with the challenge. Sad, but true. I'm sure there are exceptions, but doesn't the Project Runway audience seem like the wrong place to promote booby wrestlers? I mean, it is. That was a rhetorical question.
Inspired by the fake violence, Sweet P decides that she needs to arm-wrestle someone. Christian accepts her challenge. She tells the "skinny-armed little twit" to man up and they go at it. As they're struggling, Sweet P squeaks, "If I lose, I die." And...Christian wins!! Kind of on a technicality (they move before a hand actually hits the table) and Sweet P doesn't die, but surprising, no? Girls are weak. Even when they arm-wrestle each other. They hug after the competition. Rami is surprised that Christian won and he says, "I'm beast, you guys! You just don't know!" Everyone laughs.
Tim comes in and he brings the Divas in for a 30-minute fitting. Maria is thrilled with Chris' design. She really is. Rami compliments Torrie on how toned she is and says it puts him to shame. Tim tells Sweet P that the white ensemble she made for Candice looks like she's from the WWE hospital. Candice agrees -- she says she could buy the basic ensemble that Sweet P has made at "the stripper store." Awesome. She recommends to Sweet P cascades of rhinestones. Sweet P interviews that she is being asked to make the tackiest garment she could imagine. Oh my God, get over it! This is so weird to me. No one's asking her to love wrestling or their clothes -- just adapt, for God's sake.
Ricky's garment is orange, and Tim says that he's worried about the color. Ricky says that there's a "reason" to his madness. Christian loves his outfit and, thus, the challenge. He thinks that Kristal is one of the fiercest people he has ever met. "And that's a big deal because I have met some fierce bitches up in my life." I imagine Christian places every person he meets on the scale of fierceness.
After the Divas leave, Sweet P freaks out over all of the things asked of her by Candice. Ricky asks Christian if he can borrow a snap, and Christian gives it to him without even looking at him. He interviews that he didn't want to give him the snap, but you help people and their work is still not great. He thinks that Ricky's outfit is completely a bathing suit, but he's not going to tell him because he wants him to get weeded out. Ouch.
In the sewing room, Sweet P says that her diva name is going to be "Spread Eagle" and her move is going to be "the thighs." Chris diverts a little from the game and says that he's going to be Wonder Woman and she's going to smother men with her large breasts. But, Wonder Woman is already a thing and she doesn't do that. Whatever. Christian says that his diva name would be Ferosha Coutura and she sprays girls in the eyes with hairspray. He should patent that shit -- it's good.
Tim comes back later and asks Ricky what he's doing. He's making this cape thing that Tim thinks is "a little Wonder Woman." Okay, I'm getting confused and not just because of all of the inconsistent Wonder Woman references. I want to see Ricky cry again for old time's sake as much as the hateful person, but why is Tim giving him notes about taste? Because I 'm assuming that's what he was doing. It's one thing to be boring, like Sweet P's outfit. I don't understand how he's qualified to judge anything being too big though. I don't know -- that's weird to me. Rami tells Tim that Torrie loves the color he chose-- Tim isn't sure the judges won't hate it. Tim likes Jillian's. He tells Christian that his design is "fierce" and I really must insist that everyone stop saying that word.
Tim has a lot of problems with Sweet P's design. He thinks it's unrefined (really?). He thinks the robe makes the outfit look like Eva Gabor on Green Acres, which is awesome in its trueness. He says he doesn't want Sweet P to go home from this challenge. He forcefully demands that she make it work, then he's gone.
Sweet P is crying in the sewing room. Christian asks her if she wants him to be honest with her and doesn't wait for an answer. "It's really ugly." She knows, but she doesn't know how to fix it. She interviews that she knows it's bad, but if she adds all of the stuff that Candice asked for, the judges would hate it. I'm not so sure that's true.
The morning, Chris wonders what the judges would have to say about wrestling outfits. Sweet P is worried about what Candice Michelle will say. At the workroom, Tim reminds them that someone will be eliminated that day. Uh, yeah, we know that.
Sweet P thinks that Candice Michelle is happier today than she was the day before. Christian says that this is one of his favorite outfits. Chris said that Ricky's outfit is cheesy. Ricky interviews that Layla looked nervous when she saw his outfit, which makes him feel like he fucked up. Michelle loves Jillian's design. Torrie loves the pink, but Chris thinks it looks awful. Christian says that Sweet P's outfit looked like a craft project, but she fixed it and it looks much better now.
Before they walk to the runway, Sweet P says that she just wants this challenge to be over. Commercials. The question for America to ponder and text this week is "Which fight would you want to see?" A. Christian and Ricky, B. Sweet P and Rami, C. Tim and the Divas from WWE. Come on, they're not even trying. That's a stupid damn question.
On the runway, Heidi is wearing another shiny cocktail dress. Girl likes to party. She introduces Michael, Nina, and guest judges, from Heatherette, Richie Rich and Traver Rains. Okay, that's awesome. They're perfect for this.
The show begins with Christian's design. Kristal is wearing black leather chaps with black lace underneath. She has a bare midriff and an asymmetrical black leather jacket. She has a lace sleeve on one arm and there's fur around the collar of her jacket. It looks good and oddly (given the context) Christian-like. Beneath the jacket is just a simple one-sleeved black lace top. Fits like a glove. There are little flares of leather at the ankle of each chap. It looks awesome. Totally slutty and gross, but awesome. Christian thinks that his is the most wearable outfit.
is Jillian's outfit. It's a metallic blue bra top, with blue straps that wrap all around her torso. The straps lead to some super short boy shorts that fit really well and show you the bottom of Michelle's butt, which should help pay her mortgage. It's really cute and, as usual, fits perfectly. Jillian says that she accomplished what she was trying to do.
is Ricky's outfit. It's a bathing suit. It, however, is a pretty sexy bathing suit, and possibly the best thing that he has made so far on the show. It's, essentially, an orange bikini top with a ring in the middle that connects to the bottom. There is very intricate pleating everywhere and the thing fits her perfectly. That's not hard when you're as hot as Layla is, and she is seriously hot. I think everything's real too. And she's wearing ankle boots, which should make me cringe; but I love it. The downfall is this A-line gold cover-up that she was wearing when she walked out. Totally pointless, except to cinch the idea that design looks like a bathing suit. Ricky says that he is confident in the design but not in what the judges will say.
is Chris' design. It's pretty good. It's a green leopard bra top with criss-crossing straps everywhere. She's wearing black sparkly boy shorts that are really cute. The best part is this leopard print hooded top. The sparkly material is lining it and it looks really good. She's also wearing elbow length gloves of the sparkly material. Chris loves his design.
Candice Michelle comes out in Sweet P's design. It's a white bra top and white boy shorts, with a white robe. I'm sure it's more textured in person, but that's what's happening on my TV. The robe is cut to show her boobs and tummy, which sure does take the steam out of her weird reveal thing that she apparently always does. Nina and Michael giggle when she opens her robe. Sweet P thinks the design makes her look feminine.
Torrie comes out in Rami's outfit and she's completely terrifying. She kind of skips down the runway and I don't know how to explain it. I'm frightened is all. She's wearing that pink fabric and it essentially looks like any number of Rami designs, but this one got caught in a wood chipper. He's afraid this design looks like he has been smoking crack.
All of the designers are onstage and they are all going to get critiqued, so the Divas join them. Jillian explains that she tried to make something sporty. Michelle loves it -- she feels like she could "really go for it" in the ring while wearing Jillian's design. Michael says he feels like "the Pope at a sex club" because he's a gay and doesn't like wrestling. ["He shouldn't feel too bad, the Pope at a sex club would actually make a decent wrestling gimmick." -- Joe R] He feels like Jillian made something entertaining, yet sporty. Traver loves the booty shorts. Jillian says that he can borrow them.
Rami says that he tried to make something flirty. Michael thinks that Rami should have used something based in Americana, like "gingham gone bad." That's actually a really good idea. Nina hates the pink, and Rami's all "I knew it!"
Christian says that Kristal loves leather and lace, so that's what they did. Richie thinks she looks like Vanity, which is awesome. Michael agrees about the "Prince moment." Heidi says that Kristal scares her, but she would still consider having a go at her in the ring. Please, someone make that happen.
Sweet P explains her design and there's silence. Richie points out that there is no reveal with the robe. Candice Michelle says that she's happy, but Heidi pushes her because the producers told her to. She says that the outfit was a bit bare for her. Michael says that, if you have a client willing to go for it...uh, go for it.
Michael says that this challenge wasn't much of a stretch for Chris, but he really liked what he did. Richie and Michael agree that it looks expensive. Richie loves the design.
Ricky says that he chose Layla because she's spunky. Nina says that she likes the design as a bathing suit, but not a costume. They ask her to put the cover-up on again and this shit's over. Richie hates it. He says it's unflattering and boxy. Traver says that Ricky really didn't attack the challenge or embrace the chance to dress a superhero.
Later, the judges discuss their favorites. They all like Christian. Nina says that he was able to make it sexy without revealing too much. Michael thought the jacket was fabulous. Traver thought that Chris' design flattered the model. Michael says that Maria loved how she looked. Nina thought that Jillian's was her favorite. Michael thinks that her design really accomplished the goal of sporty and sexy.
Heidi thinks that Ricky missed the boat. He says that he has seen that swimsuit before and the tunic was unattractive. It looked like a "disco hair-cutting smock." Traver says it stuck out like a sore thumb on the runway. Richie says that Rami's outfit was too "frou-frou" and it looked like "Paris Hilton wannabe." Richie actually looks a little like Paris Hilton in 10 years himself. Heidi thinks she stood out, but not in a good way. Sweet P didn't give her client what she wanted, which was a drag queen. Michael thought her robe looked "chewed up."
America wants to see Tim fight the Divas. Why?
Back on the runway, Jillian is in. Chris is the winner! He seems surprised and really happy. He interviews that of course he would win the tackiest challenge. Christian is in. Rami is in. Heidi tells Ricky that all he made was a bathing suit. Sweet P's outfit did not match the image of her client. Sweet P is in! She seems shocked. She kisses Ricky as he walks off the runway. With dry eyes. Huh?
He says, totally without crying, that he will take away from the show with a stronger sense of self. He's not going to fear what others think. Christian, like, sticks his tongue out at Ricky. Rude. Ricky's still not crying as Tim takes him away. What is this about!? I did not see this freak bawling everywhere over some former fat lady's clothes to see him walk off the show without some DRA! MA! Cry! He says that he has the rest of his life to show at Bryant Park. No crying. At all. Anticlimax much?