Previously on Popstars: the girls went to New York. They talked about themselves a lot. They met Regis and the other one. Tonight the girls go to Chicago. They find out that people downloaded their song (to silence its constant repetition in our heads). They meet their "biggest superfan." The poor girl finds Travis at her front door and freaks the fuck out. Then the girls perform again for fifteen hundred people. Hey, kids, that's today's secret phrase. Every time you hear the words "fifteen hundred people," scream really loud! Okay? Great! Nicole loves this. Maile hates it. Remember? I already recapped this segment at the end of the last recap. "Eden's Crush in the fast lane of fame." Oh, wretched narrator, how I won't miss one single second of your voice when this ends week.
We start with Ana Maria saying, "We're gonna make it look really hot." Cut to screaming young girls. I mean young. Ivette says she's not prepared at all. More screaming nine-year-olds. Nicole says she'll see it when she believes it. Screaming girls.
The narrator says that the girls are in Chicago, continuing their media tour. Maile screams from the cold. Ivette shares her scarf. I can't imagine that Ana Maria is going to survive the temperature here. Maile sings a song about Chicago and the guards try and push her back on the plane. Rosanna sings and dances "Get Over Yourself" to the camera while waiting for her ride at the airport. How annoying is that? I feel so bad for their cameramen. People are taking pictures of them in the airport. Ana Maria tells us in a split-screen: "It's actually really cool when I get to meet people that know me that I don't know." She says it's strange when they know her name. Rosanna cuts in to give her opinion. She says it has been very strange for her.
Shots of the wet Chicago street. The camera is following some limo around. I have a feeling it's not Eden's Crush's.
The girls are at B96, a Chicago pop music station. Nicole wore the stupid hat. The girls huddle together around one microphone. The DJ puts on so much "excitement" to announce the girls on the show that you can tell he has no idea who he's talking to. Maile cuts in to explain that there's a 99.9\% chance that you won't make it in this business, and there's a 0.1\% chance that you will. She says there's a small voice in the back of her head saying that quite possibly no one will come to the show. Why, did St. Elmo stop paying people to like you? The girls sing on the radio as the narrator tells us that "Get Over Yourself" is the most-requested song on that station, so they should get a full house.
Oh, I love this line by the DJ: "Eddie, you know I love amazing statistics. Here's one. Sixty thousand people downloaded the new single 'Get Over Yourself' this past weekend alone. Sixty thousand people!" "Eddie," the saddest intern in the land, gives the required whistling noise. The girls forget that they are on the radio and just make surprised faces and stick their tongues out at the news.
The girls take pictures with the DJ and hug him while the narrator tells us that the single is a hit and fifteen hundred people will be at the show. Scream real loud!
The cameraman finds Nicole stumbling around the wet streets of Chicago. She's looking all around and spinning. "We're here in the beautiful windy streets of Chicago!" Someone wrangle that girl back in before she catches pneumonia.
The girls pile into the limo as the narrator tells us that there are only a few hours left before their live performance. Ivette shares her feelings: "If kids are like, 'Ivette! I love you!' or something, I don't -- I -- I -- I'm just gonna love it!"
A tiny Björk girl says (completely unprompted to the camera), "I think Ivette has the best personality." Perhaps Björkette missed the first couple of episodes. A blonde girl behind Björkette agrees. She bounces up and down rhythmically and says, "Yeah. She has the coolest hair, too." Hired Young Girl #48 to them turns around and asks, "How long do I have to wear this stupid zebra jacket? I look like a fucking moron. Mom! I told you I don't want to be an extra." Ivette giggles and says, "I don't know! I just want them to -- to -- just see me and us and who we are andand think that we could like, hang out or something!" Ivette wants to hang out with eight-year-old girls. Okay.
Okay, again I have to say here that recapping young girls is very, very hard. If you're one of the young girls that I'm dissing here, you should know that I think it's wonderful that you're getting attention and that you're proud of who you are and you just go out there and do things you want to do. Having said that, you're in a very weird time in your life where you will constantly make poor decisions like clothing, food, make-up, and Eden's Crush. Later you will also look back on this and laugh. But for right now, we'll probably be the only ones laughing.
Cut to a blonde girl in a purple "Cutie" shirt. "Hi, I'm Jenny, and I'm twelve. And I am the ultimate Popstars fan." She sits in front of a Pooh bear, a Garfield, and something that looks suspiciously like an Alf.